Teach you 111 secrets of how to recognize people

The wisdom of the ancients is endless, it is like an inexhaustible treasure waiting for us to excavate, there are hundreds of schools, each has its own strengths, so we can develop our strengths and avoid our weaknesses. For example, the psychology that came from the West was actually called "the art of recognizing people" in ancient China.

Nine signs of observation of people" that is: "the gentleman is far away and looks at his loyalty, near and looks at his respect, annoys him and looks at his ability, asks and looks at his knowledge, is anxious to look at his faith, entrusts him with wealth and looks at his benevolence, tells him to look at his festival with danger, drunk with wine and looks at his side, and miscellaneous with his color." ”

That is to say: a gentleman keeps others away from his position and observes whether he is loyal; Let someone else do things nearby, and observe whether he is respectful; Let people deal with chaotic affairs, observe whether he is capable, ask sudden questions to others, and test whether he is knowledgeable; Make an appointment with him in case of emergency to see if he is trustworthy; entrust one's possessions to others and observe whether they are incorruptible; Tell others about the danger and observe whether he can stick to the discipline and have the manly spirit of not fearing danger; Getting others drunk, observing his manners and behaving in accordance with the rules; Let others get along with people at different levels, and see if their true colors are the same.

Faith is not beautiful, good words are not believed. The good do not argue, and the debater is not good. Those who know are not knowledgeable, and those who are knowledgeable do not know. ——Lao Tzu, "Tao Te Ching, Chapter 81".

Interpretation: True and credible words are not beautiful, and beautiful words are not true. Kind people don't say it by chance, and people who say it by heart are not kind. Those who are truly knowledgeable do not pretend, and those who pretend that they know more are not really knowledgeable.

Lao Tzu attaches more importance to a person's kind, honest, modest, and low-key qualities, and hopes that people will return to the basics and keep the truth in the virtual, so he has always advocated the philosophical idea of "human law and earth, earth law and heaven, heaven law and Tao, and Tao law and nature". People should be more in awe of nature and follow the way of nature in order to comprehend more "heavenly ways". For example, people should learn like water, water is good for all things without fighting, and softness overcomes rigidity; Good at living at the bottom, so he can become the king of a hundred valleys and so on.

Lao Tzu's main ideas are "inaction" and "indisputability", inaction and omnipotence, and the world dare not fight with it. He does not appreciate the beauty that appears on the outside, but appreciates the quality of introvertedness, so he thinks: people who say beautiful things are not real, people who are truly kind do not speak tricks, people who are truly knowledgeable do not show off, and people who love to show off are often half-.

This is also consistent with what modern psychology says, "the more you lack something, the more you show it", and it is precisely because Lao Tzu understands human nature that he has come up with this mantra of knowing people!

Look at the reason, look at the reason, and observe the safety. How are you scared? How are you scared? ——Confucius, "The Analects of Confucius: The Essay on Politics".

Interpretation: To understand a person, we should look at the motives of his words and deeds, observe his experience, and examine what kind of heart he is comfortable with. How else can this person be hidden? How else can this person be hidden? ”

Confucius's method of observing people is more pragmatic and objective, he has always paid attention to "observing his words and observing his deeds", and then combined with the state of mind of others, from a person's words, actions and hearts, a comprehensive understanding of observing a person, then this person has nothing to hide!

The ancestor's ability to recognize people is a bit difficult to understand, so I haven't studied it deeply.

I used to hear an aunt and grandmother say, "The poor don't get land, and if they get land, they pretend to fart." She probably thinks it's about people's experience. I hope it doesn't have a bad impact on her children.

The mantra of the ancestors, I think it is really accurate, basically from some details.

The face is born from the heart, looking at a person's eyes, complexion, and own smile, you can have some preliminary understanding of this person.

Hair, forehead, eyebrows. Ears, eyes, nose, human beings, mouth, teeth, face shape, zhi, lines, yintang, heavenly court, atrium, earth, body shape, physique, limbs, essence, qi, god, color, skin color, posture, posture, gestures, speech, etc.

You can tell from a person's expression whether their eyes are flickering or not.

I know from the heart that I haven't seen other people-recognizing techniques myself, maybe it's a more extensive and profound culture.

Look at one's eyes to see it, because the eyes are the windows to the soul.

The horsepower of the road is far away, and the hearts of the people are seen for a long time! Listening to the sound of speech, listening to the sound of gongs and drums, this is the principle of philosophy.

Look at the eyes, look at the forehead, look at the eyebrows, look at the nose, look at the complexion, look at the spirit, these are very knowledgeable.

When looking at people, we must not look at the surface, but look at how they behave.

The ancestors also said that people should not be disguised.

Look at the eyes, and the eyes will experience for themselves.

Faith is not beautiful, good words are not believed. The good do not argue, and the debater is not good. Those who know are not knowledgeable, and those who are knowledgeable do not know. ——Lao Tzu, "Tao Te Ching, Chapter 81".

In life, it is really difficult to correctly understand the personality of the people around you. But if you can't understand the other person's style of life, it is likely that all kinds of problems will arise in the process of getting along. Next, I would like to share with you 4 tips I have summarized about accurately recognizing people.

First of all, people who like to talk ruthlessly may not be really ruthless, but those who are submissive on the surface are generally cold-blooded and scheming, and they are really ruthless. Previously, because a job was not done well, the unit leader criticized two colleagues in our department (in fact, the main reason was that the leader had problems with the work).

A colleague confronted the leader on the spot and quarreled a few words. Another colleague nodded vigorously to the leader and expressed his acceptance of criticism. But no one expected that after that, the seemingly obedient colleague secretly collected some evidence of the leader's violations and directly reported the leader.

Due to the fatal evidence, the final leader was dismissed from office.

In addition, once the sycophant is in power, it is inevitable that he will bully others. He will obey the words of the superiors, but he basically does not pay attention to human nature to the subordinates, and brutally oppresses the workers. Although there is a colleague in the unit who has average work ability, he has good sycophancy skills and obeys the leader.

The people around him don't look down on him, and he doesn't care.

After he was promoted to the head of the department, it can be said that the people under him were brutally oppressed, and a female colleague did not approve the leave for pregnancy (according to the due date, there will be 10 days before the birth). In the end, the two also quarreled, and the trouble was resolved only by the main person in charge. (According to a female colleague, the "sycophant" went to the leader and pretended to be pitiful and generous, which made people very disgusting).

There is also the fact that people who are useless in reading are generally those who have not read books and have no knowledge。I feel this the deepest, since I was a child, my family was poor, but my parents still provided for me and my brother to study and go to county schools.

Some relatives or people from the same village who think that their family is not bad (they work at home) will say cool words, "What's the use of studying, it's better to go out and work." You see, we didn't study, and we didn't have a good life." Later, it turned out that even now, reading is the best way for children from poor families to change themselves and their families.

Those who persuade you to read uselessly are basically people who have not read books and have no knowledge.

At the same time, a person who has a good temper in front of outsiders often does not have a really good temper. I always believe that everyone has a character, and if a person shows the image of a "good old man" to everyone outside, then this person may be more extreme in personality, and at the same time, he may not have this good temper at home.

My cousin is very polite to everyone outside, and other people's requests can be said to be responsive, and everyone thinks he is a good person. Until one time my cousin-in-law came to my house crying, saying that my cousin was insulting and beating her, just because it was hot at night, and my cousin-in-law turned on the air conditioner. Then my cousin-in-law also said a lot of things that happened before, which also made people shake their views.

Interpersonal communication is definitely a complicated thing, and it fully shows that everything cannot be just superficial. If you really want to see a person, you still have to get close and observe.

<> "How to Recognize People Correctly?"

It is especially important to be able to socialize with what kind of people at what level!

First of all, you have to understand what kind of people you come into contact with, and what kind of path you will take. The people at the bottom will teach you how to be diligent and thrifty, and the villains will teach you how to cheat and deceive. Self-disciplined people will teach you how to be motivated, and successful people will teach you how to improve.

The greatest luck of a person is not to pick up money, but one day you meet a person, he breaks your original cognition, improves your thinking, and then improves your realm, and takes you to a higher realm, this is your nobleman.

Some people say: The strong are indifferent, and the self-motivated are indifferent. First of all, we have to understand a cruel fact, people who can start from scratch and counterattack from the bottom are very ruthless.

If you don't mix well, when you are poor, your relatives, friends, siblings, and even your parents will look down on you, and any little thing will attract all kinds of accusations.

You also have to understand that people like to find faults in the poor and strengths in the rich. When you don't have money, everything you do is wrong, and when you have money, everything you say will be believed as the truth. That's right, the money in your pocket is a label that you can prove yourself, prove your ability, prove your vision, and establish your authority.

They don't believe in you as a person, they believe in the money in your pocket!