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It's normal to have a moderate amount of comparison, I think everyone or sensible children will have this mentality to some extent, it depends on the treatment of a certain event, if it is academic, it is not necessarily a bad thing, it can make him work harder, but if it is other aspects, it is not necessarily a good thing, it may cause an extreme personality.
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First of all, he should not be given this kind of atmosphere, she may be surrounded by some such children, and the environment is very important to educate people. You may be able to take your children to poor families for children to receive education, often find some poor children's adult video materials, some truths may not need you to talk hard, these things can let them understand by themselves, parents should be correctly guided from it. It is normal for children to have the psychology of comparison, and the key is to guide them to compare.
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Normal, because everyone has a love for beauty! It is recommended to give your child a certain amount of pocket money, according to the economic ability of the people around the child and their own family, pay attention to this appropriateness, which means that the pocket money should be in the middle among the child's classmates, and the child should be dressed up beautifully, and vanity is not manifested here? Of course, it is not to buy clothes every day, the key is to have a neat and plain overall image.
Usually inculcate traditional Chinese virtues ......Don't be too strong in the indoctrination process, and understate it a little.
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Adults also have the psychology of comparison, not to mention the current children, if it is a material comparison, tell him not to compare his own shortcomings with others, other children may not have it, but he has it, other children have not.
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It's not normal, you have to be enlightened
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The main thing to educate children so that they do not compare and spend money indiscriminately is to correctly cultivate children's self-confidence and at the same time correctly understand the concept of money.
The main reason for children to compare is that children's self-confidence is not enough. We want to cultivate children's self-confidence, first of all, the company of parents is the first priority. Give your child a childhood full of security, so that your child will have the confidence to do what she wants to do, and let your child know that parents are the strongest shield behind your child.
Of course, this is not something we can tell our children, but more importantly, the actual actions of parents and their children with behavior. Register.
Nurture your child's hobbies and hobbies, so that children have their own fun and goals. In this way, it is also beneficial to the cultivation of children's self-confidence. Children have their own interests and hobbies, which makes their lives fulfilling.
Not only does the child's self-confidence have a great improvement in the core of Huai Sheng, but also diverts the child's attention from comparison and cultivates the child's strengths. It is conducive to the establishment of children's various concepts.
Let children manage money, cultivate children's money concepts, and educate children not to climb the Zhou family. Work with your child to make a plan about money and spend it in a reasonable and planned way. When consuming, it is best for parents to accompany them and guide their children in a good direction.
For example, books, paintings, art appreciation.
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Living in this society where interpersonal relationships are intricate, everyone is often comparing husbands, children, houses, jobs, salaries, clothes, jewelry, and so on.
Blindly following and imitating can only lead to blind obedience, which will bring harm and negative impact to people's body and mind.
At present, many children also have a comparison mentality.
According to the analysis of psychologists, comparison is not a flood beast, and the key to children's comparison psychology depends on how adults guide them.
Many adults think, since there are good material conditions, why not provide them to their children? Anything should be treated with a normal heart and go with the flow, and it is not a good thing to deliberately make children poor.
Comparison is also related to the family atmosphere, adults set a good example, and children will not blindly compare material conditions.
As the saying goes"Contentment", be grateful for life, cherish the life you have now, whether adults or children, will live freely and happily.
In fact, catching up and overtaking is just a measure to motivate children, and there is no need to really make yourself out of breath in order to catch up.
Comparison learning is a good direction, but while seeing horizontal comparison, we should pay more attention to vertical comparison, that is, compare with ourselves.
Compared with yesterday today, tomorrow and today, there is a little improvement every day, and a week later, a month later will be a big stride.
Psychologists suggest that mindset is crucial in the process of comparing with each other.
It is of course a good thing not to be left behind and not satisfied with the status quo, but everything has a degree, and the goal is to jump up and accompany you to reach it.
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The so-called "comparison psychology" is a state of mind in which children deliberately compete themselves against others and hope to surpass others. In terms of daily living conditions, children with a strong sense of comparison will "want everything" and will never want to have less than others. So, how to educate children so that they do not compare and spend money indiscriminately?
Comparison is a common phenomenon among children nowadays, and parents are often at a loss. But in fact, the child's comparison heart is fundamentally due to the problem of the parents' own pretense.
First, the standard of living is getting higher and higher, parents cherish their children, and parents themselves are unwilling to lag behind others, which is also the root of comparison;
Second, being too accommodating to children will allow them to develop a comparison mentality and form dependence.
Avoid "comparing hearts" and focus on correct guidance
1.You can't be blindly satisfied, children are "vain", see other people's new toys they also want, many parents feel that this is not a problem, children also want to buy for their children. Such a habit will only encourage the child's desire to compare.
2.Cultivating children's concept of money from an early age, so that children can understand that not everything can be "bought, bought", can reduce children's material comparison psychology, so as not to spend money indiscriminately.
3."Comparison heart" is the ability to take advantage of the fact that children have some comparison heart, which is actually very common. Parents should first face up to their children's comparison psychology and motivate their children to develop and grow in a better way.
Children have a comparison mentality, indicating that children have a sense of competition in their hearts. Parents should grasp their children's enterprising spirit, change their children's concept of comparing food, clothing, and consumption, and correctly guide their children to compare themselves in learning, talent, and willpower. In fact, the child raises each one"I'm going to ...... too"It's all scrutinized, and parents need to pay attention to the correct guidance at this time.
Making good use of children's comparison psychology is also a resource.
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1. Children lack self-confidence.
The child thinks that others usually like him and approach him because he has some things that others do not have, so once others have something that he does not have, he will try his best to get the same, or even better than others.
2. Children pay too much attention to appearance.
Some children love beauty very much and attach great importance to their appearance and image, so if a friend around him buys beautiful clothes or accessories, he can't help but buy them, so as not to be compared to others.
3. The child is not convinced.
Some hail children were ridiculed by other Hu Honghua children because of some aspects of themselves, and he felt unconvinced, so he would find a way to show it to those who laughed at him.
4. Children are affected by the environment.
If the child's family and friends usually like to compare, then the child will also be affected and become fond of comparison.
When parents find that their children have a comparison mentality, don't complain about the child, don't be too anxious, correct guidance is very important, you can try these three methods of Kakama.
1. Appropriately guide children to transfer "comparing food and clothing" to "comparing learning".
In fact, the child's psychology of comparison is very positive, indicating that he hopes to be better than others, which can be regarded as a kind of self-motivation. Usually, parents can find ways to let their children shift their comparison behavior from consumption such as eating and clothing to learning.
Parents can usually find ways to arouse their children's comparison psychology in learning, such as saying to their children: "Your good friend did well in the exam this time, but you are also very good, and he is only two points short of him." I believe that if you work hard, you will definitely be able to surpass him next time.
When a child hears something like this, he is likely to work harder so that he will surpass his best friend in the next exam.
2. Guide children to turn comparison into motivation.
No matter what the reason for the child's comparison mentality, parents must find a way to let the child understand that if they want to surpass others, they can only rely on their own efforts. If you want to surpass others in your academic performance, then you must study more seriously; If you want to wear clothes that are more beautiful than others, you have to work hard to make money.
If I were the mom in the example above, I would tell my child that you can buy designer shoes, but mom will only help you pay for a pair of regular shoes, and you have to find a way to make money to pay back to mom. As for how to make money, the mother can arrange some housework for the child and let him earn it through labor.
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1. You can't be blindly satisfied.
Children are "like the new and hate the old", they want to see other people's new toys, many parents think that this is not a big problem, and the child wants to buy it for the child. This kind of doting will only promote children's vanity and comparison.
2. Cultivate children's awareness of Jincong orange money from an early age.
Cultivate children's awareness of money from an early age, so that children can understand that not everything can be "bought, bought".
3. "Comparison heart" can be used appropriately.
It's actually normal for children to have some comparisons. Parents should first face up to their children's comparison psychology and motivate their children to develop in a good way. The child has the psychology of comparison, which shows that the child's heart has a sense of competition.
Parents should grasp the child's self-motivation, change the child's thinking of comparing food and clothing, and consumption, and guide the child to compare in learning, talent, perseverance, etc.
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Because children are more comparative, they may have been influenced by their parents. For example, my mother likes to compare herself with her friends, and today you bought a nice finger shirt trench coat, and tomorrow I will buy one too. Children will learn to dress better, and they especially like to pester their parents to buy things that their classmates have.
If you want to change your child's behavior, parents should first reflect on their own behavior and stop making comparisons. As long as the parents change, the children will definitely be able to change.
Some children are not more interested in learning together, but than their parents are rich, or who wears more beautiful clothes, especially some little girls. Because little boys are more careless and may not care about these things, while little girls are more sensitive and can pay attention to what others are wearing. Parents should also pay attention to their own behavior when raising little girls, and should not be too pampered with little girls.
Some boys actually compare themselves, and they compare their own learning. For example, if a little boy says that he scored 100 points in the test and has been praised by his parents, another little boy will also be very envious and want to do the same. Such a comparison is worthy of affirmation, after all, it is carried out in the good aspect of the divination, not the material comparison.
Parents should tell their daughters that material comparisons are useless and that it is wrong for mothers to do so, and that they will correct them later. After discovering a change in the mother's behavior, the daughter can also make the change, and will not do it all the time. Parents can also tell their children that what they enjoy now is earned through hard work, and that only by studying hard can they live a better life in the future.
At this stage, the main task is to learn, not to compare, which will transform the child's thinking.
Educating children is a difficult task and requires time and patience from parents. At the beginning, the child will definitely not be obedient, will be coquettish on the side, as long as the parents are firm, the child can also understand.
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1. First of all, we must figure out the cause of children's comparison, children want to get more attention, and to get the attention of others, they must have a sense of superiority over others, and the origin of this sense of superiority is the child's demand for materials, so it will naturally compare.
2. Once the child does not have this sense of superiority, he will form an inferiority complex, so try to meet the child's material needs within the scope of his ability, so that the child can reduce this inferiority complex, and also need to correctly guide the child to look at the psychology of comparison; Parents should start from all aspects to help their children build real self-confidence. Children like to compare, in fact, it is a manifestation of lack of self-confidence, which is reflected in extreme external ways, and their vanity is greatly satisfied by their bright appearance.
3. Parents should not let their children get used to relying on the family's money to spend, and let their children try to participate in some social activities and get corresponding remuneration. Spending the money they earn in this way can further let them know that money is not easy to come by.
4. Educate children to establish a correct outlook on life and values. Find excellent learning role models for children, such as a positive image of hard-working students in the same class. They can also participate in poor rural assistance activities, so that they can experience the different difficulties and adversities of other children's lives, so as to cherish the existing happy life.
5. The child's continuous request for a famous brand should be decisively refused, so that the child can work hard to achieve a certain goal and then satisfy him, so that he knows that the things he asks for are not easy to come by, and learn to cherish them.
6. Encourage children to make up for the difference in this comparison psychology from other aspects, such as studying hard, when the child's academic performance is very good, it will naturally reduce the requirements for material needs, because his focus has shifted.
7. Don't spoil your children too much, some parents end up making irreparable mistakes in order to satisfy their children's selfish desires. Parents should also establish a correct education model for themselves, loving children is not doting on children, not giving what they want, and meeting all requirements, in the end it will only make children become bottomless pit and more greedy and unsatisfied. Constant requests for name tags should be resolutely rejected.
How to guide children not to compare and not to be vain.
1. I think that whether it is a rich family or an ordinary family, we should educate our children to establish a correct and healthy view of money and consumption.
2. First of all, we must clearly tell the child that the money is earned by the labor of the parents and through their own hard work, so that the child knows that money is not easy to come by from an early age and must be obtained through his own labor.
The second is to teach children to distinguish between the two concepts of "want" and "need" when children are consuming, teach children to be grateful for what they already have, set a limit for children's consumption, and strictly enforce it.
The situation of each family is different, and the children's cognition is different, so it is still necessary to cultivate children to establish correct concepts from an early age according to their actual situation. The above are some suggestions on how to educate children not to compare and not to be vain.
First of all, it is wrong to educate children to compare, and secondly, you have to tell your children that even if there is money at home, it is the money that your parents work hard to earn, and they earn so much money to make your life better, not to let you go out and compare with your classmates, if you want to compare, you can go out and earn money by yourself, and then you can spend the money you earn at will, and your parents will not say anything about you, but you can't take your parents' hard-earned money to go out and compare with others, this is not right.
What are the disadvantages of the psychology of comparison?
Method 1: Tell your child how hard it is to earn money.
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