Women should know what kinds of family internal friction must be avoided in marriage?

A shrewd woman understands that meditation and introspection can be a silly woman who is scathing and mean to transform others. didn't know that not only did this make no progress, but it would continue to bruise and bruise all over his body, and at worst, it would definitely harm the relationship between the two people. The writer Lin Yutang once said:

Wise renunciation is better than stubbornness. "The demand for a man must uphold this standard, it is good to be able to reform his shortcomings, but when he can't be transformed, he must learn to let go, otherwise only he is sad.

After getting married, my good friend complained about her husband more than once, he hated that his husband put his shoes messily every time he came home, he didn't know how to wear clothes and pants that didn't fit well, and he smacked his lips when eating. This kind of problem has become a small detail that she has to pay attention to all the time, and when she sees the problem, she needs her husband to correct it. But what a man wants most at home is nothing more than a comfortable and free feeling, being supervised and transformed by his own woman all day long, which man would be willing to do it.

After that, their marriage only had disputes because of this triviality, and then the man began to come home slowly too late, until the good friend found out that her husband had found a new emotional sustenance outside, and then regretted it. I still remember a psychology counselor once said: "The secret of a happy married life depends on paying attention, not blindly correcting it."

Perfect love is based on the principle of mutual understanding, paying attention to each person's living habits and all his choices, so that the two can achieve harmonious coexistence. And to transform another convenience is to blindly force the other party to do things according to himself, even if this kind of coercion is with love, it is self-righteous love, and the other party does not want to accept it at all. Transforming others is actually a very stupid act, and it is also a huge cost to marriage.

Some people have said that if there is no comparison, maybe everyone feels that they are happy, but if they have comparison, there will be pain. read such a story, a woman was born poor, in order to solve her fortune, she studied hard and was admitted to a very good college, and after graduation, she married a young man in the city. The young man was very kind to him, and although his family was only a salaryman, his parents probably used all their possessions to buy a new house for him.

However, in the comparison with her colleagues, she realized that the house she lived in was the youngest among her friends and the worst location, and she suddenly felt that she was inferior to others and would be looked down upon by others, and she wanted her husband to change to a bigger house. After they finally saved money and changed from a small house to a big house, she began to envy those colleagues who drove good cars, and her husband couldn't satisfy her impulse, so she began to be lonely.

In fact, if you think about it, at first she just hoped that she could come out of the countryside, and she had no extravagant hopes for what kind of house to live in or what kind of car to drive. Happiness is comparative, and pain must be caused by comparison.

Don't always complain about your other half, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law conflicts, children's education problems, these kinds of family internal friction must be avoided.

You can't always complain. Don't always be dissatisfied with your family, don't always be bad with your husband, and don't always speak ill of your mother-in-law.

Men need to ask their parents' families about everything. is still corrupt in thought, and only knows patriarchal families.

Give the other person a little more personal space. Man is alive. Trying to capture someone's heart is sometimes like grabbing sand.

The harder you grasp it, the more you can't grasp it. If you hold it in your hands, you'll instead get more sand! In marriage, each other is unique, and I hope that each other, whether it is a heart or a person, belongs only to each other.

The other party can listen to their own opinions and obey their own ideas, but the stricter the control and the tighter the grasp, it will make the other party more likely to have a rebellious mentality. There is no personal space at all, but it makes the other party feel depressed and sleepy too tight, making him want to escape, so it is easy to quarrel!

Respect each other's parents. Parents are the world of children. No matter who it is, the affection for parents is the deepest.

When couples quarrel, both parents play a very important role, especially girls. Many of them are similar in thought and personality like their parents. After all, the parents-in-law are not the man's biological parents, and the parents-in-law are not the woman's biological parents, so there is no affection between them.

How can the relationship between the two be managed? Very important! Respecting each other's parents does not mean how much it costs.

Many times it is just an attitude of the other party, respect, and a good relationship with the other party's parents. One day, you fall out, and your parents will help you reconcile!

Don't say you're absolutely right or wrong. Home is a place to talk about feelings, not a place to talk about right and wrong. Many marriages fall into long-term internal friction, that is, they care too much about right and wrong.

No matter what happens between husband and wife, they have to argue about right and wrong, and neither obeys anyone, and no one lets anyone. As a result, the louder and fiercer it is, the louder the noise! You have to understand that the purpose of quarrels and conflicts is to let the other party know that their bottom line is in.

This is an exchange of views. Don't touch the other person's bottom line. Once you know the other party's bottom line, try to avoid it next time.

What does the other half care about? What do I need to pay attention to next time? That's all!

Adhere to the principle that big things should be discussed and small things should be given space, and no matter what happens at home, we must respect each other's opinions. We must not act alone and make decisions on our own. Small problems should be given space to be dealt with by the other party, and big problems should be discussed.

For example, children's education, large economic expenditures, and parental support, many problems cannot be solved after they are faced, because once they wait until then, it will be too late.

See each other's core needs. As mentioned earlier, the root cause of internal friction between husband and wife is the unmet needs, for example, the wife wants to be cared for, and the husband wants to be respected......If you don't care enough and don't respect enough, two people may not express it directly, but blame each other in various ways and find fault and quarrel.

Don't quarrel overnight, communicate with each other, play straight balls to express your thoughts, and don't guess.

That is, two people should respect each other, treat each other as their important people, and cannot have little secrets.

Internal friction can have a serious impact on a marriage, but there are a few things you can do to improve the situation and protect the relationship. Here are some suggestions to help you stay away from internal friction:

Communication: Communication is the key to solving internal friction. Be open and honest with your partner and share your feelings, thoughts, and concerns. Listen to each other's perspectives and find common solutions.

Set common goals: Establish shared goals and values, which will help you stay on the same page in the face of difficulties. A common goal motivates you to work together and avoid internal friction over small things.

Personal space and independence: Maintaining personal space and independence is essential to a marriage. Everyone needs time to pursue their hobbies and careers, which helps to reduce over-dependence on each other and reduce internal friction.

Conflict Resolution Skills: Learn effective conflict resolution skills to avoid arguments escalating into a vicious cycle. Respect the other person's point of view, avoid offensive language, and find common solutions. Huai Song.

Time management: In your busy life, make sure you have enough time to focus on your partner. Create romantic and meaningful moments that enhance feelings.

Most importantly, maintain love and respect, and invest time and effort into the marital relationship. Remember, marriage is a process of growing together, and dealing with internal friction requires cooperation and effort from both parties.