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Probably because of the distance, the two people don't often get together and slowly don't have a common topic, there is less and less content to talk about, and in the end there is no interaction except holiday greetings.
It should be the same between people, two people who used to have a particularly good relationship are estranged because of the distance, and they are slowly estranged. It doesn't necessarily have to be any contradictions, it's just that it's not that intimate.
I was born in a rural area, and the girl next door used to be my best friend, and we were almost inseparable until junior high school. At that time, the whole village knew that we were on good terms, and I would definitely see her within five meters of my appearance.
It's such a relationship, and the two of us drifted apart after going to different junior high schools. At the beginning, the two of us couldn't wait to get together during the holidays, and then we talked about unrelated topics. Later we found outThere really isn't much in common with each other, and being together is either the embarrassment of talking with a duck or the embarrassment of not talking to anyone
This awkward situation lasted for about two years, and then we slowly stopped getting together. When you go home on vacation, you have to have nothing to do, and the two of you will stay together for a while, but there is nothing to talk about, which is very embarrassing. When we grew up, we both had jobs and started our own families, and we didn't have any contact with each other, and even now we don't even have each other's **.
I had very close friends in junior high school, high school, college, and even everywhere after work, and we talked about everything when we were together, and the relationship between the two of us was so close that everyone else would envy me. But as the living environment changed, the relationship between them slowly became estranged.
Especially after being in a different city, it has become a luxury for everyone to want to see each otherSome people haven't seen each other since they separated, and the intimacy they once had with each other has long since been replaced by a sense of strangeness
I don't know when this person's mobile phone number has become a decoration in my mobile phone address book, although the number looks very kind, but I don't have the courage to dial that**. It was as if we had become familiar strangers, and we felt very familiar with each other, but we had no desire to connect with each other.
If there is any gap between us, it is really not, thinking of each other and still feeling that the time we used to be together was very good. But it's too unlikely that you'll let me be so close to my old friends again. What separates us is the strangeness of distance, we all have different jobs and lives, and the past can only remain in our memories.
Probably this is the truth of life, although it is regrettable, there is no turning back.
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Slowly estranged from former friends, this reason is many, especially after graduating from college, going to work, often because of the relationship between work, more time is spent on work every day, or getting married after work, because of family and other factors and former friends gradually become less connected, plus the distance between the two people is relatively far away, naturally the relationship between the two people will be slowly estranged to a certain extent, in addition, there are also some differences between former friends in some things and views, Naturally, two people will also be estranged, but no matter what, the friendship between real good friends is able to withstand the test of time and landmines and other factors, even if two people usually rarely contact, but the heart will care about each other, when the other party encounters difficulties, each other will go all out to lend a hand, to help, to maintain a good relationship with their friends is important is that two people are more tolerant of each other and understand each other, seeking common ground while reserving differences, And real friends are also built on the basis of mutual trust, and can withstand the test of any time, even if some people look at the surface and slowly estranged, but in fact, the two people's deep concerns for each other are not changed and their emotions are weakened.
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Why do good friends become more and more estranged? Psychologists gave the answer, although it was heart-wrenching, but it was reasonable:
1. Time and distance will make each other no longer intimate.
When we go to college, we will find that our good friends, who used to talk about everything, are becoming more and more distant. In high school, good friends who had to go to the toilet together, because they went their separate ways in college, because they no longer contacted each other for a long time, even if they had time to get together again, they would become no topic and lose the happiness and understanding they once had.
Good friends are becoming more and more estranged and less connected, mostly because each other's schedules are full and they are too far apart. Even if they are still close friends, they will have their own new social circles because of the distance, and they will only seek help from new friends around them when they encounter difficulties and problems. Each other is busy with life and maintaining a new circle of friends, so there is less contact and the relationship is weaker.
2. Differences in each other's values.
When we grow up, we are all busy with our work, and we will find that people who used to have a good relationship will have a lot of different choices when they grow up, and there will be a gap between the industries and the speed of progress that everyone is exposed to, because the circle of interpersonal communication is different, the circumstances are different, and everyone's values have changed a lot in the day after tomorrow, and they are not the same as each other.
We also know that people with different values will become "not speculative", so the connection between the two people will become weaker and weaker. Just like Zhang Ailing's self and college friend Yan Ying, because of their respective developments, Zhang Ailing and her friends separated, although there were correspondence, but because of their different circumstances and different values, the friendship between the two people slowly became weaker and weaker.
3. The principle of making friends for adults - gentlemen's friendship.
We used to think that good friends should be inseparable, and we should talk about everything. As we grow up, we realize that friendships that need to be maintained from time to time are even less worthy of mention than those that we don't connect with often. True friendship is someone who doesn't connect often, but who can help you when you're in trouble.
The principle of making friends for adults is: "The friendship of gentlemen is as light as water". When we make friends, we should consider whether the character of our friends and the principles of dealing with the world are compatible with ourselves, but we don't need to be in touch from time to time, because this is the social norm, and it is the principle and way of adults to make friends.
We are born as human beings, so everyone is a lonely traveler on the road of life. Time will filter out those unimportant people and things, and eventually precipitate some beauty and preciousness. So as we grow older, we seem to have lost some friends, but in fact, we really see clearly who the people around us are the real friends.
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If you say that you are slowly estranged from your former friends, then there are many reasons for people to be estranged, and it may be that there is a particularly bad misunderstanding between you. But it may also be because you are slowly losing contact with each other, and then you will slowly become estranged.
In fact, in real life, we also have some very good friends, and these friends are sometimes we don't keep in touch for a long time. We can still see each other at first sight, this is the real friend, and the friend here does not need us to deliberately maintain. Even for a long time, we still trust the other person to throw it, that is, when we are in trouble, the other person can generously help us.
But this kind of friend is difficult to find in real life, and once you can find it, you still have to cherish each other.
But in fact, no matter what, sometimes even the best friends should always keep in touch with each other. Because of the mutual connection, it is possible for your friendship to continue like this, so that you will not become very strangers to each other. Because many friendships can't stand the scrutiny of time, sometimes, no matter how good a friendship is, it may go through the baptism of time.
Slowly, the two people no longer have contact, and slowly, the two people no longer help. may be because of the relationship between time and space, which can make the friendship between two people slowly fade. In the end, it slowly drifted away.
This is probably probably the most important reason why many people are estranged from their former friends, or because of lack of contact.
But for the adult world in the society, no one is easy, sometimes because of work, because of life, we sometimes have a hard time communicating and communicating with friends. Because I don't have time, and if such a vicious circle continues, we will slowly lose more and more time to communicate with friends and communicate, so it will slowly make this relationship cold. Even sometimes we pick up our phones and don't know which friend to talk to, because we may think that the other person's life should not be disturbed anymore, and slowly this relationship may be because of this.
Neglect of contact and slowly faded, slowly no longer had the original enthusiasm, and slowly became estranged.
Therefore, good friends should still contact each other more, contact more, communicate more, and let each other be familiar with each other, so that we can talk about everything. Slowly can ensure friendship, and will not slowly become estranged due to the dilution of time. It's really not easy to make a friendship in life, and let's not let this friendship slowly become alienated by time.
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I believe that the root cause of estrangement among friends is the increasing difference in worldview and outlook on life. For example, most childhood friends are playmates, have a common language, and gather together because of hobbies.
When we step into the society, it becomes a real interest relationship, fighting for different goals, the feelings of both parties will become indescribable, your distress will be incomprehensible, and his worries will be confused.
Drifting away. When I grow up, the people and things I will meet will be very different from before, and there will be a different circle of friends, but I think.
You must have had a great friendship before.
Otherwise, how could it feel like this?
But. Please believe in it.
Friends are bound to be for life.
Friendship can't just be what it once was.
Believe that your friendship with your friends is the most important thing.
As for how to handle your relationship.
It's up to you to taste it.
You can't learn to learn.
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Your question is, why did you and your friend drift apart?
o Generally speaking, most of them are if the relationship is very good, under normal circumstances, they will not be estranged, but unless there is a contradiction in the end, they will be estranged, for example, we are in a unit, we have a few people at the beginning who do have a good relationship, and then recruit a few people, we are particularly familiar with one of them, at that time our relationship has gone for a while, the relationship is particularly friendly, to the time when the family has something, we all go to help each other, When we go to the old man's house every year during the Chinese New Year, that's what happened to us, but then there was a time when we were talking, <>
There is a person who inadvertently said the wrong thing, and then their relationship gradually drifted apart, and later, after a period of contact, after a period of self-criticism, our relationship is very close, in fact, it is inevitable that there will be contradictions when we have friends, at this time we must see each other's mistakes, o instead of just seeing others are not good, they are particularly friendly, often say that the slap does not make a sound, that is, two people must have something wrong, not one person, <>
Therefore, no matter when there is a contradiction, you must self-criticize and see if you are wrong? And someone else's fault**? It mainly depends on what kind of reason you are responsible for, this problem has been strange for a long time, as long as you are such a person, then, the probability of conflict will be very small,
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There are many reasons why you are slowly estranged from your former friends, as follows
1.Because of the pressure of life, each of us went to different cities to work hard in order to live, met different people and got along with them day and night, and became friends. And our former friend also stayed in a different city to start a new life for her
Busy with marriage, busy with friends, busy with work, busy with children, busy with children, busy with children, busy with children, so that many people lose time to contact the outside world, family, children and work have become the whole of life, and former friends have not been in touch for a long time and have more unfamiliarity and suspicion of each other's friendship, resulting in playing together, going to and from class together, going to work together, shopping together in the evening shift, but becoming the most familiar stranger.
2.Society is developing, each of us is upgrading, friends are also upgrading, friends are upgrading, friends are upgrading, friends in the past may just be people who think they are warming each other at that stage, time is advancing, and our circumstances are also changing. People are also more mature and more willing to take on everything independently.
Friends in the past are just in line with what we used to know, and today may no longer be suitable to be friends.
3.Sometimes there is a kind of estrangement between former friends because you are too bad, people think that they can't find the value they need in you, and they are a little worried that your contact or your initiative will be a trouble and a burden for them. So such friendships are not destined to last.
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