Psychology Why do you always leave bad feelings to your loved ones?

If your bad mood is left to others, then others will not get used to you, and only relatives can tolerate your bad temper, so we should really control our emotions.

Because in psychology, people are a kind of creatures that need to be moved in both directions, because you may not have a lot of moving needs for outsiders, so getting along with outsiders is relatively more rational, and it will not be very emotional, but your dependence on your family will be heavier, so you need to be moved more, if your family doesn't give it to you, then you will give them bad emotions.

Because leaving bad emotions to others, others will not eat you, which will make your interpersonal relationships worse, and your relatives will tolerate you infinitely.

Because you know that no matter what you lose your temper with the people closest to you or do anything wrong, they will not leave you, so this is the favored one has nothing to fear, but we can't just inch because of this.

Whatever a person does, it is for his own benefit.

He did this, venting his anger on his relatives, he himself was happy, but his relatives suffered.

This kind of person just doesn't take into account the feelings of other people. After a long time, his relatives will not be able to stand it and stay away from him.

To put it mildly, this kind of person is stupid.

Those who are submissive to outsiders, to their relatives, and those who love themselves, have become fattrums.

As a relative, you must have the courage to resist, otherwise in such an environment, you will be angry if you are not depressed.

Why do we always smile at strangers and speak ill of those close to us?

I think it's because this kind of person has a good face and likes to "pretend", and she has two faces, she is an "angel" when facing outsiders, and a "demon" when she faces her family, and she may also be influenced by traditional culture. There are many such people, there is one around, when facing people outside, the smile on his face is very bright, and his speech has become much softer, which is really very polite, but when he faces his family, he becomes another face, and he has a face every day, and he starts to make a lot of noise without saying a word, which is really unpredictable.

This kind of good-looking and like-to-"pretend" person understands a truth very well, he knows that no matter how he treats his family, he will forgive him in the end:The reason why Xu gives all his bad emotions to his family is because they know that their family will be tolerant, and no matter how much grievance and harm you bring to your family, they will eventually forgive you for your excesses. Therefore, they will disguise themselves as a very good-tempered person when facing outsiders, and they will not lose their temper even if they are angry.

may be influenced by traditional Chinese culture, which is more subtle. When facing outsiders, he can open his heart and say anything, but when he faces his family, he feels that he is difficult to say something that he cares about:Being harsh on those close to you and humble to those who are not relevant is a mistake that many people make.

You can take it for granted to say "thank you" for the help of outsiders, but you can't say it to your relatives, I think maybe it is influenced by traditional Chinese culture, and the expression of emotions will be very subtle and introverted, and you can let go of outsiders, but you feel embarrassed to treat your family, although it is not the original intention, but you can't control your temper.

Everyone should know that family is the most important thing, our ultimate destination, and there are some things to be said bravely, not to be a "two-faced person":The family is able to tolerate your bad emotions because he loves you, so. We should leave the best temper to the people closest to us, only home is the ultimate destination, and family is always dependent.

The so-called "tree wants to be quiet but the wind does not stop, the child wants to raise but does not wait", don't wait for your family to leave you to wake up, then it is already too late.

Because such a person has to maintain his own relationships with others. Always keep a smile in front of others. Although the attitude towards the family is poor, it is actually to attract the attention of the family.

Mainly because our family will tolerate us, so we will be unscrupulous, and in front of outsiders it is the opposite.

This may be because they love themselves deeply and give themselves enough security, no matter what, they will always forgive themselves, so they will be so "unscrupulous".

Leaving your worst temper to those closest to you is mainly because only those closest to you can tolerate yourself and truly understand yourself. In the process of interacting with people, we will find an interesting phenomenon, that is, the better our temper will be when we associate with people who are more distant, and the worse our temper will become when we associate with people who are closer to each other. This is due to the fact that we dare not fully release our feelings when interacting with people we don't know, we can be careless when associating with people close to us, and we vent our frustration in front of those closest to us when we are hurt.

When interacting with people we don't know, we don't dare to fully release our feelings and are cautious. When we interact with unfamiliar people, because we are not familiar with each other and do not understand each other, we do not dare to fully release our feelings in front of each other, but will be cautious, for fear of making the other party angry and hurting ourselves because of our bad performance. Because of this, we tend to have a good temper when we interact with strangers, and we don't have seizures even if we are unhappy.

In front of the closest people, we have no scruples, and we can fully reveal our true feelings. When you associate with the person closest to you, because the other party is your closest person and you know each other best, you will have no scruples, dare to fully show your feelings, and if you are unhappy, you will show it unreservedly, even if the other party is unhappy, you are not afraid. It is for this reason that we are prone to tantrums when we associate with those closest to us.

When we are hurt, we tend to vent our frustration in front of the people we know best. In daily work, study and life, we will encounter all kinds of unsatisfactory. For these things that make me unhappy, I don't dare to say or do anything in front of outsiders, I can only hold my unhappiness in my heart.

But when we are with the people closest to us, we can vent our dissatisfaction without scruples and release all the grievances we have suffered. Such an approach can cause harm to those closest to you. This is the most fundamental reason why I always give my bad temper to the people closest to me.

I often hear people say that we always show humility, politeness, and gentlemanliness in front of outsiders, and vent all our bad emotions to our relatives, saying that it is wrong to do so, and that we should not be as humble and good-tempered as we are at home and abroad.

There is some truth to this statement, but it is not comprehensive. I only thought that there should be a harmonious atmosphere at home, and I didn't think that people would collapse after being suppressed for a long time. No matter whether you are a man or a woman, no matter what kind of work you do, in today's society, you have to face pressure from all sides, and there is no bad reputation outside, and people are obliged to tolerate your bad mood at will.

And home is a warm harbor, relatives will understand and tolerate you, if you have to wear a mask at home to hide and suppress emotions to live, just not too hypocritical or too depressed, long-term suppressed emotions people will collapse.

Of course, understanding and tolerance should be mutual, but at the same time, it should not be excessive, and it is not right to only consider oneself without taking into account the feelings of one's loved ones. I think it's okay to vent your emotions in front of your loved ones, but not too much, and appropriateness is the most important thing.

In the emotion, many people will make irrational choices, if the people around them become the emotional punching bag, and the person concerned happens to complete an emotional recovery in the catharsis, obtain an inexplicable "happiness", and the other party and I are safe for a period of time after that, then this occasional injury will become a habit, and the injury will become more and more frequent.

So, the conclusion here is that if the people around you are used to losing their temper with you, then this habit must be cured, otherwise it is likely that you will become a victim because you ignore it.

Emotions always need to have an outlet, and the outlet can be either "the maker of the problem" or "an innocent victim who has nothing to do with it". If the person does something that he regrets emotionally, it is most likely because he does not have the inner ability to challenge the "problem maker" and has to look for the "innocent victim".

So, the second conclusion is that if you can't say "no" to the person who often loses his temper, your boundaries are easily broken every time he is emotional, and in the end you become a "victim" who has no escape.

I'm also afraid that there is a loved one around me who is in a bad mood, so what can I do to help this person who is in a bad mood not only be able to vent his negative emotions correctly, but also be able to manage his "anger" more and more?

You will say to him, please be "professional", can we not get angry and talk well?

It's a pity, it's just your wish, the inner him has burned through, you let him endure it, and the next time it will be more violent.

You would say to him, "That will hurt the children and hurt the feelings of the couple," right?

I think this logic is right, but letting the other party feel guilty does not motivate him to deal with his emotions correctly, it is possible that he suddenly cuts off his emotional perception, although the judgment is suddenly quiet at the moment, and that emotion goes deep into consciousness and continues to hurt him.

Today, Edamame Daddy will tell you how to deal with emotional anger.

When we feel a special indignation, a special imbalance, how can you do this to me? It makes so much sense. How good it is for me to dig up the divination, but you do!

When we are touched by something that inspires us and we feel uncomfortable, it is easy to shift the blame to others instead of calming our own emotions. When we find that these people have a lot of problems, we don't realize that our anger cannot be eliminated. It's like someone has set a fire in front of your house, do you go after the person who set the fire, or do you want to put it out quickly?

Anger, when once generated, we must find an outlet, if we are often angry, we will feel that we have a place called Taichong acupoint, and it will hurt a lot when we touch it, or it will hurt a stomach, or a sore throat. If ignored, the consequences can be very serious. So we have to find a place to vent.

Because they subconsciously think that their family will tolerate everything they have, and there will be no consequences for venting bad emotions.

Everyone in real life has responsibilities on their shoulders, and there are countless pressures in their hearts. Some people choose to keep their bad emotions to themselves, while others habitually keep their bad emotions to their families, and the former is the strong person in life.

No one will tolerate your bad moods, and every discovery has the potential to bring bad consequences to life. I used to work in a certain company, and for a period of time, because the work pressure was too great, the leader always kept increasing the workload, I directly turned against the leader, and left after a big fight.

Of course, the end was obvious, I was often put in small shoes in my subsequent work, and finally I couldn't bear it anymore and chose to quit. In fact, there are many things like this in life, and after entering the adult society, the responsibilities on our shoulders are getting heavier and heavier, and we are less and less able to show our true emotions, and we begin to learn to live with masks.

We know that no one will tolerate our bad feelings, so we can only comfort ourselves silently.

Those who habitually leave bad feelings to their family members think that there will be no consequences in doing so. Family members will give us more tolerance and understanding, and will not choose to leave because of something, which is actually the inner confidence of most people who vent their bad feelings to their families.

They know that their family members will not give up on themselves because of this, and they also know that family relationships will not be severed because of the venting of their bad emotions, and they understand that after venting negative emotions, they will not bring a bad ending to their lives, so they become fearless.

Habits are always scary, and when it becomes a habit to leave bad feelings to the family, the whole family relationship starts to slowly become unacceptable.

In fact, everyone has their own principles and bottom line in their hearts, but family members are often more tolerant of their relatives. But this is not a reason for us to leave our bad feelings to our family members, but rather a reason why we should love them more.

Don't leave your bad feelings to your family, hurting them is actually hurting yourself.

Because only the family members can't quarrel and scold. Even if there is a conflict with each other today because of something, they can still reconcile the next day. But if you give your bad mood to outsiders and others can't accept it, it may be goodbye.

The closer people are to themselves, the less they will hide their emotions, so many people are used to keeping their emotions to their families, which is also their instinctive reaction.