I m too vain and I care too much about what other people think

I am a lively and cheerful person on weekdays, and I don't quarrel with people very much, but I know my character flaws, first of all, I found that my vanity is too strong, but I am "strong when I am strong, weak when I am weak", if someone bragged in front of me that they bought very expensive clothes or cosmetics, I also competed with her, saying that I bought more expensive, if I was a plain and indisputable person around me, I would not compare with her, but would be with her ** which house when the things were discounted. But now I am surrounded by people who love to compare, and my vanity is getting stronger and stronger. I don't like this kind of self, and I reflect on it every time I'm alone, but when I get to those people, I go back to the way I was.

I also care too much about what others think of me, so that I have a lot of friends who can tell me, but I don't want to talk to them, for example, my boyfriend's family conditions are average, and now I am worried about the decoration of the house, I have no one to tell, the problem is me, I don't want others to know that my boyfriend's family conditions are average, and I actually worry about decorating the house, maybe because the current society is comparing, I feel ashamed to say it. It is said that the more there is, the more you compare with something, but the conditions of my family are not bad, when others show off, I always have a feeling that "my family's conditions are better than yours, what are you showing off in front of me". I hate myself more and more, how can I adjust my mentality?

Get out of social fear and build social confidence!

But all individuals have a little vanity to a greater or lesser extent, and they are eager to gain the attention and admiration of others. This is also sometimes a good promoter of progress. But we all hate people who have vanity, who are pretentious, arrogant, who like to boast and only care about themselves, and if you are really disgusted by such types of people, I suggest that you stay away, so as not to look bad.

It's just that in life, for various reasons, we can't stay away from this kind of person, so we can only find ways to change him or change ourselves. One is to be a "dead fish", choosing to turn a blind eye to the various manifestations of people with strong vanity, ignoring them, and letting all his strength hit on cotton; The second is to be a "two-faced person", boasting on the surface, satisfying their vanity, satisfying them, and burying the truest thoughts in the bottom of their hearts. The third is to be a machine gunner, as long as there is an opportunity, he will spare no effort to attack and criticize their vanity, and suppress them with great reason, so that they will doubt themselves.

It's best not to get along, if you have to get along, she has a strong sense of vanity and jealousy, so you don't want to say anything, just say something good.

How to get along with a person with a strong sense of vanity is to hold him in everything, and to praise him in all kinds of ways.

When you get along with people with strong vanity, you should keep a low profile, so that you can get along harmoniously and happily!

Not far or close, not flattery, not revealing people's shortcomings, and objectively evaluating each other's advantages.

People who encounter vanity forces should pay more attention to themselves when they get along with them, as the saying goes, you can't have the heart of harming others, and you can't have the heart of preventing people. Respect and stay away, you can't conspire with big things, and think more about everything.

Then you have to follow vanity, otherwise, you will be honest, others may not be able to follow you for a long time, or you have the ability to slowly change her vanity.

Naturally, it is flattery, and it is the only way to do it.

The root of a person's low self-esteem is the internal negative self-evaluation. There is a learned helplessness in psychology, which tells the story of a scientist who once conducted an experiment that if a person has been hit too many times, he will naturally think that he is not good. The same is true of the root cause of a person's low self-esteem, if you are in negative emotions for a long time, coupled with the habit of comparing yourself with others, then you will often have very low self-esteem.

If you want to change this inferiority, you must learn to take control of your life. I once advised students with low self-esteem not to compare, because comparison is the key to our growing inferiority.

We often say that people are more popular than dead people. Only when a person finds his own rhythm will he become more and more confident and healthy. How to find the rhythm of self is to start from the field of self-interest, actively affirm the value of self, to know that everyone is a unique self, we can only fully tap the treasure of self, we can fully see our own potential.

There is a philosopher who said that low self-esteem does not come from your shortcomings, but from the strengths that you do not have enough to fight against, and when you establish a rhythm of self-development, your strengths will become more and more, and then self-confidence begins to be shaped.

It's vanity! The more people you come into contact with, the more you see the world, and the more you feel at ease. Vanity is nothing but a desire in your heart, a desire for attention and praise from the outside world.

When your heart is rich enough, I believe that you will gradually become calm. The emptier the heart, the more ignorant the person is, the more vain he is.

You have to look a little opener, be a little more open-minded, don't be too greedy for these, too careful, otherwise, life will be very boring.

In fact, if you can express this state in your heart, the problem is not very serious, at least you can find the cause of the problem, so that it is more helpful to solve your own psychological problems, vanity is too strong, and the psychology of inferiority belongs to the growth process, the formation of some habits and the influence of the environment, and even the influence of genetics, these are all things that need to be considered comprehensively, and it is not impossible to solve them, which needs to be changed for a relatively long time, especially after adults, the personality has basically been fixed, vanity is strong, and there is an autistic psychology, these are the shortcomings of the personality, you can do a psychological test through psychological counseling, go to a formal institution to do a psychological test, and then more clearly analyze the value orientation and the reasons for the problem of your psychological personality, and be more able to solve it in a targeted manner. Recognizing the existence of the problem is the beginning of solving the problem in itself, and I wish you to solve your psychological problems as soon as possible.

5. To overcome vanity, it is necessary to overcome inferiority complex and build self-confidence. It is often said that behind strong vanity lies a deep inferiority complex. People with low self-esteem do not see the advantages of themselves, magnify their own shortcomings, and feel that they are like people everywhere, so they feel that their lives are meaningless and have no value of existence, which often causes reactions, and people with extreme inferiority complex will go to self-show-off, pursue vanity, and covet honor.

6 If a person wants to achieve good academic or work performance, he must rely on his own hard work, and those "honors" obtained by deception are false and dishonorable.

7 The value of a person is not determined by how he feels about himself, but by the significance of his actions to society. As long as we establish a correct outlook on life and set lofty goals in life, we will not be entangled by temporary honor and status, but strive to dedicate ourselves to higher values.