The heart of blame is responsible for oneself, and the heart of forgiveness is forgiven for others.

—"Zengguang Xianwen".

1.When criticizing others, you should think about whether you are doing well enough, and when you forgive yourself, you should also think that you can't be too harsh on othersBlindly forgiving oneself and blaming others will only make oneself unenterprising and unreasonable.

If you always blame yourself, you will find that there are many things that are not as you imagined, and you will correct them. Forgive others, take a step back and open the sky, give others and give yourself a chance.

2.In fact, as long as you look at the problem from the perspective of others and consider other people's ideas, it will not be too subjective and biased, and you can also avoid many misunderstandings. If you can do this, you can be regarded as a real gentleman.

1. The heart of blaming others and blaming oneself and forgiving oneself means to ask and reflect on oneself with the heart of demanding and blaming others, and to be tolerant and considerate of others with the heart of forgiveness and understanding of oneself. This sentence is to hope that we can be strict with ourselves and lenient with others.

2. The heart of blame for others is responsible for oneself, and the heart of forgiveness for oneself is forgiven for others, excerpted from "Zengguang Xianwen I".

3. "Zengguang Xianwen".

It is a Taoist children's enlightenment bibliography compiled during the Ming Dynasty in China. It is also known as "The Sage of the Past" and "The Sage of the Ancient and Modern Times". The title of the book was first seen in Wanli in the Ming Dynasty.

The opera "Peony Pavilion" of the year

Based on this, it can be inferred that this book was written in the Wanli period at the latest. This book is a collection of aphorisms and proverbs from ancient times to the present day. Later, after the continuous supplementation of the literati of the Ming and Qing dynasties, the current "Zengguang Xianwen" was cast.

This is a Chinese proverb that means to blame oneself with the mindset of blaming others, and forgiving others with the mindset of forgiving oneself. This sentence tells people to be strict with themselves, to be lenient with others, to be self-reflective and then to be tolerant of others.

In our daily lives, we often encounter a variety of problems and difficulties. When something goes wrong, we should first reflect on ourselves and see if there is anything we can do to improve. If our actions or decisions lead to problems, we should have the courage to admit our mistakes and try to correct them.

At the same time, we should also be tolerant of the mistakes and shortcomings of others, and not easily blame or criticize others.

When dealing with others, we should treat others with a forgiving attitude, understand their situation and difficulties, and give them sufficient understanding and support. We should believe that everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, and instead of grasping their shortcomings, we should learn to appreciate their strengths and get along with them with a tolerant attitude.

When dealing with relationships, this quote reminds us to maintain a balance and rationality. When facing problems, we should first reflect on ourselves and demand ourselves with the mentality of blaming others. At the same time, we should also understand the situation and difficulties of others, and forgive their mistakes with a tolerant attitude.

This balanced approach can help us build better relationships and reduce conflicts and tensions.

In short, the phrase "blaming oneself with the heart of blaming others, and forgiving others with the heart of forgiveness" tells us an important truth: be strict with oneself and be lenient with others. In our daily lives, we should always maintain this balanced and rational attitude, introspect ourselves and then be tolerant of others.

From: Ming Dynasty Anonymous "Zengguang Xianwen Iji".

Meaning: to demand and reflect on oneself with the heart of demanding and blaming others; Be tolerant and considerate of others with a heart of forgiveness and understanding. When criticizing others, you should think about whether you are doing a good enough, and when you forgive yourself, you should also think about not being too others.

Traditional Chinese culture emphasizes benevolence and teaches us to be loving and generous to others, but we must be strict with ourselves and avoid competitiveness. Therefore, we must see more of our own shortcomings, be more strict with ourselves, and avoid ourselves from embarking on the annoying road of competitiveness and good people worthy of being teachers. Spend more of your mind blaming others on blaming yourself, and more of your mind of forgiving yourself for forgiving others.

The meaning of this plan is to demand oneself with the psychology of being demanding of others, and to forgive and forgive others with the psychology of forgiving and forgiving oneself. It is hoped that we can be strict with ourselves and lenient with others.

In this real world, most people will naturally believe in an unspoken rule: if you are good to me, I will be good to you; You're not good to me, I'm sorry, and I won't be good to you.

This doesn't seem to be wrong, and it makes sense. However, if we can be more understanding, more tolerant, more tolerant, and more generous on this basis, maybe we will have more friends and be more happy.

When mistakes are discovered, it's basically human nature to shift the blame to someone else. Even if it's clear that it's our own mistake, we still find many good reasons to forgive ourselves. Therefore, when persuading people to improve their self-cultivation, it is recommended to be strict with themselves and lenient with others.

"Blame oneself with the heart of others, and forgive others with the heart of forgiveness" comes from "Zengguang Xianwen", which means: to blame oneself with the attitude of blaming others, and to forgive others with the attitude of forgiving oneself. It exhorts people to be strict with themselves and lenient with others; Don't indulge yourself, don't care about others.

Practice in life, live in practice.

Vernacular translation: A rich man suddenly fell ill at night, and ordered his servants to strike stones and make fire. It was cold and dark that night, and there were no knives or stones to be found.

The rich man urged the servant urgently. The servant looked angry and said, "You are too unreasonable to rebuke people, and now it is as dark as pitch, why don't (you) give me light with fire?"

If I can find the tools to strike stones to make fire, then it will be easy to get fire later. ”

The rich man said, "I have a fire, do I want you to light it?" When the people heard about this, they said, "Blame a man with a righteous reason!" ”

Original text: A rich man fell ill at night and ordered his servants to drill into the fire. The night is cloudy, and there are no knives or stones. The rich are urging urgently. The servant said angrily: "It is very unreasonable for the king to blame people, and now it is as dark as paint, why don't you shine on me with fire?" I should be looking for drill fire, and then it is easy to get ears. ”

The rich man said: "I have fire, why do I want to shine more!" When people heard this, they said, "Blame people for their own way." ”

Source: From the Three Kingdoms period Wei writer Handan Chun's "Blame the People Should Be Their Side".

Wen Shuguang. This sentence comes from "Zengguang Xianwen", which means to be strict with oneself with the mentality of blaming others, and forgiving others with the mentality of forgiving oneself.

There is such an interesting phenomenon, when we see other people's good-looking **, we will say: "What camera (mobile phone) did you use to shoot it?" It's so beautiful.

When we see that the ** taken by others is not good-looking, we often laugh at the person who took the photo for his poor skills.

This is because people are accustomed to attributing their own success to themselves and the cause of their failure to the environment. Attribute the success of others to the environment, and attribute the failure of others to yourself.

When we return to our lives, we also reflect on ourselves, when we blame others, do we also have to find the reason from ourselves?

In the same way, when we indulge ourselves, forgive ourselves, and forgive ourselves, can we also use this kind of forgiveness to tolerate others?

If you are particularly tolerant of yourself and particularly harsh on others, it is what we often call "double standards", and this kind of person generally does not get particularly good interpersonal relationships.

In our daily work and life, we should be strict with ourselves and lenient with others. In this way, we can be more open-minded, whenever we see other people's shortcomings in one way or another, or who we don't like.

Do we first have to reflect on ourselves? Do I have the same flaws, and what would happen to me if it were me?

Understanding this is very helpful in our daily life. We are accustomed to seeing the shortcomings of others, and we are accustomed to looking at others with colored glasses. Why not look at things differently?

Many times, the shortcomings you see in others may simply be due to human nature. In other words, if it were you, you would do the same, because it is human instinct to seek advantages and avoid disadvantages.

Blindly forgiving oneself and blaming others will only make oneself unenterprising and unreasonable. If you always blame yourself, you will find that there are many things that are not as you imagined, and you will correct them. Forgive others, take a step back and open the sky, give others a chance, and give yourself a chance.

In fact, as long as we look at problems from other people's perspectives and consider other people's ideas, we will not be too subjective and biased, and many misunderstandings can also be avoided. Do unto others as you would have them do to you. If we can do this, our life path will be smoother and smoother.

In the process of getting along with others, one of the mistakes we tend to make is: to blame others; For yourself, you will open the net. In this way, interpersonal relationships become strained, and it is normal to live a more tired life.

So how can we change this? The ancients gave us the answer:

Blame others, blame yourself; Forgive oneself and forgive others. This is the truth, if you turn the previous way of dealing with people and things upside down, you will find that you will have more and more friends, your mood will be better and better, your quality will be higher and higher, and your popularity will be better and better.

There is also a saying that goes like this: "But to blame oneself, not to blame others, this is the way to resent; But if you believe in yourself and don't believe in others, you will be defeated. ”

The meaning of this sentence is that blaming only oneself and not blaming others is the way to stay away from resentment, and only believing in oneself and not believing in others is the main cause of failure.

Those who want to correct others must first correct themselves. His body is upright, and if he does not order, he will do it; His body is not right, although he can't make it. If a person can't even manage himself, he wants to change others, which can only be said to be a pipe dream.

What you can't do yourself, you can't force others to do so well, because only when your ability is above others, your suggestions will be respected and respected by others, because people admire the strong, not those who are not even as good as themselves, this is the so-called "poor do not visit friends, cheap do not persuade others". When we understand these truths, we should not blame others at will, because that will not win the understanding of others, but will only attract more resentment.

Self-confidence is an indispensable and important factor for a person, but if you are overconfident, you will become conceited, you will not trust others, and you will not be able to listen to the persuasion of others. If you are self-appreciating and insisting on doing your own thing, it will be difficult to get the good advice and persuasion of others, let alone find your own problems, and you will have no opportunity to correct your own defects. In the long run, this kind of person will become self-serving, and his actions will often end in failure.

Therefore, on the basis of a clear understanding of ourselves, we should restrain our words and deeds with higher requirements, tolerate the mistakes of others, listen to the opinions and suggestions of others on the basis of self-confidence, brainstorm and learn from others, so that our work will get more people's attention, and we will also get their supervision and help, so as to make our own things more perfect.

In short, in the process of dealing with others, we "do not do unto others as you would have them do unto you." "It will make my interpersonal relationship more harmonious.