What to do if your child is aggressive during activities

Parent-child education Introduction] Now the child does not know what the reason is, can not speak well, especially love to lose his temper and have a little bit of unpleasant things to start throwing things, in the face of such a situation parents really do not know how to deal with it, let the experts to guide parents how to deal with such children.

Parent: The baby is almost three years old, I began to consciously cultivate his social skills, so I often take him to the children's house, but I found that the baby often snatches the children's toys, and even beats people. I had to keep an eye on him, lest he hurt others, or hurt myself, and I scolded him harshly, but to little avail.

What am I going to do? Baby education.

Expert advice: Perhaps one of the most difficult tasks a child faces as they grow up is learning how to strike a balance between being too aggressive and being too aggressive. Aggressive internal drives are innate, and these internal drives are often expressed at different ages and through different behaviors.

As a parent, you must help your child to control, adjust, guide and manage, but never suppress the child's aggression.

When a child behaves aggressively, parents should first show their attitude. For example, "I don't like it when you pull your child's hair because it hurts." ”

Second, figure out what causes your baby to be too aggressive. Whether it's because he's been bullied by other friends who are noisy, or has experienced something particularly annoying, etc. There is a good chance that your baby will have some of his requests fulfilled through unintentional aggressive behavior, leading him to mistakenly believe that aggressive behavior is the solution to the problem.

Finally, you need to help your child release or deflect aggressive emotions. A 3-year-old child already has a strong ability to speak. We need to let him explain for himself why he is attacking others.

If your baby doesn't want to say it, you can say it for him, such as "I guess you're ......."Is that so? If not, you can correct my ......In this way, your child will feel that his parents care about him and will facilitate his communication with you. Then you work together to figure out how to solve it.

Workarounds for children to be aggressive:

1. Parents should set an example and create a civilized and polite atmosphere in the family. It is very likely that children will be imitated and vented through aggressive behavior.

2. Parents should do a good job of active defense, actively control a variety of factors that may induce their children's aggressive behavior, and guide their children to be friendly with others, help others, etc., so that they can realize the harm that aggressive behavior brings to others.

3. Train children's ability to resist frustration, especially psychologically, to withstand the blow of frustration, and learn to remove the adverse effects of frustration through transfer, elimination, etc., and if there is any dissatisfaction with the Chongchang faction, it should be expressed and resolved through normal channels.

4. Let children learn to use reason instead of force, it is irrational to use force to resolve conflicts, children should be warned not to use force to resolve conflicts with others, and when they encounter disputes, it is best to solve them by reasoning.

5. Treat the child's behavior calmly, when the child has aggressive behavior, parents must remain calm, do not immediately yell at the child, and do not protect the child because they are afraid that their child will suffer, and should let the child explain the reason for the occurrence, let him propose a solution by himself, or put forward some suggestions. It is not hopeless for a child to have aggressive behavior, and parents should guide their children calmly and gradually improve their children's behavior.

There are many reasons why children like to attack others:

1. to"Self-centeredness"The effects of bad character.

Around the age of three is the critical period for the formation of children's personality, children at this stage are obviously self-centered, everything is self-centered, do not consider other people's ideas and wishes, and will be based on their own preferences, how to be happy and how to do, and even more, it is a good intention to do bad things, the intention is good, but unexpectedly do what others are not willing to do. This is due to age, and they do not yet have the ability to distinguish between right and wrong and grasp the serious.

2. The influence of unscientific family education methods.

Children who live in authoritarian or overly doting families are prone to aggressive behavior. In an absolute authority family, parents neglect to teach their children, and once the child makes a mistake, the parents will use punches and kicks to discipline the child.

In overdoting families, whenever a child encounters a small setback, parents will always find other reasons to relieve themselves. For example, if the child accidentally falls, the parents will say: "It's all bad floors, drop xx, hit it!"

Children under this family upbringing, over time, will find other people's reasons when they encounter unsatisfactory things, and they will also have aggressive behavior.

3. The impact of TV, online games, etc.

Mass media such as television and the Internet are indispensable and important contents of children's lives. Cartoons or scenes of violence on TV and online games will undoubtedly have a negative impact on children and provide them with objects to imitate. In particular, some boys are more likely to be interested in violence and action movies, and over time, they will also try it out in their lives, which leads to aggressive behavior.

If a child has aggressive behavior, parents do not guide it reasonably, which will make the child's occasional aggressive behavior become habitual aggressive behavior, which will have a great negative impact on the child's social development. For children's aggressive behavior, parents must guide them reasonably so that this behavior disappears in the bud.

Some parents will find that their children sometimes attack others for no reason. For example, when he wants to play with children's toys and the children refuse to give them to him, he will snatch other people's toys. Sometimes the parents of the bullied child will come to the house, which will embarrass the parents and apologize and apologize.

The frustrated person directs the attack directly at the person or thing that frustrates them. After being frustrated, it causes anger and resentment in the heart, showing angry eyes, sneering at each other, sarcastic sarcasm, and hitting others.

Psychologists from Jinan Nachuan Education and Training School summarized the following reasons why children like to attack others:

1) Using aggressive behavior as a means to an end. If a child unintentionally uses aggressive behavior to achieve a certain goal, it is likely to reinforce the performance of that behavior later on. If parents don't pay much attention or indulge too much, it's easier to become a habit.

2) When the child is frustrated or wants to attract the attention of parents and teachers, there will be more aggressive behaviors, for example: he can't get what he deserves, he will use hitting, scolding, and forcibly taking other people's toys to vent his inner anger.

3) Aggression is not inherent in children themselves, but through learning and imitation. If parents often use corporal punishment to discipline their children, it is tantamount to demonstrating aggressive behavior, and children will learn this way invisibly.

As a parent, if you find that your child is aggressive, you should observe your child more, find out the reason, and educate your child for different reasons.

1 Give children a positive and positive influenceIn daily life, parents or relatives and friends have conflicts, and we must pay attention to how to deal with them. Don't argue or argue loudly in front of your child. In particular, parents who love to quarrel and fight should first change their behavior and resolve disputes in a peaceful way to set a good example for their children.

If your child makes a mistake, do not scold or physically punish your child. For the correction of children's wrong behavior, scolding does not play any role, only through reasoning, to help children analyze why their behavior is wrong, what the correct behavior should be, so that children can make progress. When children have bad emotions, such as being bullied by children or being unfairly criticized by teachers and angry or aggrieved, parents should comfort and guide them in time.

Parental love is the most effective medicine. 2 Avoid children's exposure to violent environmentsDuring their children's growth, parents should avoid their children's exposure to violent environments as much as possible, such as watching violent TV programs or playing violent and bloody computer games. Parents should help their children choose cartoons or other TV shows that are as healthy as possible.

If the child insists on watching such a violent TV show, parents should accompany the child to watch it. While watching, reason with your child and let him understand that violence is not to be imitated. 3. Teach children to be friendly with others, and their interactions in early childhood are mostly self-centered, and from the age of three or four, children have a sense of sharing and cooperation.

Therefore, parents should guide their children's spirit of sharing and cooperation in a timely manner, so that children can know how to be humble and experience the joy of giving and sharing.

Causes of the child's aggressive behavior.

The relationship between parents is not good, there is no education, only blame.

The father's education was simple and crude, and the education and teaching methods were inappropriate.

The child does not know how to communicate, there is no way to communicate.

Parents have a negative role model, and the parent-child relationship is not harmonious.

Parents do not teach their children how to deal with interpersonal relationships and methods.

Genetic factors. Personal emotional self-control.

Expressions. Lack of interpersonal skills.

Perception of aggressive behavior.

The accumulation of the child's influence on other negative emotions.

Negative games of social film and television.

Cognition of a certain aspect of society.

Measures: Parents treat their children's aggressive behavior correctly.

Teach your child about interpersonal communication.

Pay attention to the parent-child relationship.

Help your child regulate his negative emotions and set an example for him.