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Our family doesn't set rules.,Children and everything are learned from adults.,When adults do a good job, it's equivalent to making rules View the original post" Hope.
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If you can teach by example, it is of course the best education. I remember Zheng Yuanjie said: If you want your children to be like you, then be yourself, if you want your children to be better than you, then you have to learn to be an actor.
I can't remember the original words, but the meaning is probably like this. But there is definitely no rule that does not set rules, and then it may be that the definition of rules is different, and the way of establishing it is different, like your family, it may be established through words and deeds. It's rare.
em15] View original post
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Today's parents want to give their children full freedom and exercise their independence. However, blindly indulge "as long as you like him", "the child's happiness is the most important thing", and "these rules will be known naturally when they grow up". Children of this kind of parenting are selfish, impolite, and can even become rebellious.
So, how should parents set rules for their children?
First, parents should be gentle and firm in their rules
Gentleness means that we should restrain our feelings, not rush to criticize and blame, and tell our children what the rules are and what to do in a constant, patient and calm manner. That is, while disciplining the child, let him feel the love and patience of his parents. Firm means that once the rules are made, don't compromise easily.
Many parents and children will be defeated by their children's cries after making rules, breaking the rules and compromising repeatedly.
Second, children should not be allowed to behave rudely
What should mom and dad do if their child behaves in a vulgar manner? First, help your child distinguish between right and wrong. Say to him:
You can't do that later. This is a rude act and should be criticized! "Please be clear.
Parents then guide the child and let the child reflect on himself and come up with a better way to deal with this kind of thing. These rules can help children adjust their emotions, learn how to treat what they want, how to deal with their emotions, etc., in the process, children will constantly adjust their views and attitudes towards things. As he grew up, he used this pattern to treat the people around him and became more rational about others.
Third, the rules should be simple, specific and straightforward
Set rules for your child and pursue something simple, concrete, and direct. Otherwise, if you talk a lot, the child will not grasp the main point and will not understand. Some parents do not make rules after careful consideration, and are completely based on their own feelings, which are not clear or specific, so it is difficult to receive their children's new clothes and slowly develop a sense of resistance to the rules.
Parents should consider the laws of their children's development when formulating rules, and formulate reasonable rules according to the actual situation of their children. In the beginning, let him complete tasks that can be completed with a simple single action. For example, give children simple tasks such as "washing your hands" and "turning off the TV", and do not perform tasks that require complex actions such as "tidying up the room".
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Parents must understand their children's shortcomings when setting up regulations, set up a targeted rule, and set up a reward and punishment mechanism for their children, so that they can give their children certain rewards when they change their bad habits.
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First of all, we can write some house rules at home, and then tell the children that no one can violate these house rules, and then we can also tell the children some correct words to keep in mind, and if the children violate the rules, they should be criticized.
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Parents must communicate with their children, make rules with their children, let them live according to the rules, and cultivate children's self-discipline.
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Some rules can be set for children according to their development, and some rules can better regulate children's behaviors and make children's development better.
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Parents can formulate some rules and regulations for their children, and then let the children strictly follow the rules and regulations, let the children persevere, and the parents should reward the children.
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As the saying goes, there are no rules, not a circle, rules are very important for children, not only can play a restraining role for children, but also make children become very secure, parents to set rules for children, can let children develop good habits, have the right concept of right and wrong. So how should parents set rules for their children? I'm going to talk to you about it today.
When children are young, their comprehension ability is very poor, and their self-control ability is also very poor, so parents must not be too complicated when sending rules to their children, and they must be simple and easy to understand, so that children can understand and accept them at once. If the parent says too complicated, the child will be very confused, so it is necessary to explain the reason clearly to the child, rather than simply and rudely forcing the child to do something. These 20 million don't think that children don't understand anything when they are young, so they can follow a rule.
Although children do not have much judgment when they are young, and children may not be able to understand everything that parents say, children will look at their parents' attitudes, and children will become very obedient if they find that their parents respect them.
Parents must let their children understand clearly after practicing the rules with their children, and if the children do not understand, parents can write them down on paper and tell them that these rules must be followed. After the rules are formulated, they must be strictly implemented in the future, and there must be a certain reward and punishment system in it, so that when children make mistakes, there will be traces to follow.
Although there will be a system of rewards and punishments in the rules, parents must also be timely when implementing punishments, because children's memory is relatively poor, and sometimes they forget what they have done in the morning and at night, so when the child does not follow the rules, parents must give the child punishment as soon as possible, so that the child can remember it for a long time. Of course, when children should be praised if they do something right, parents should also praise their children in a timely manner.
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Be sure to make rules for the child, and make rules in front of the child, both parties should discuss, so that it can be very good, it should be noted that the rules can not be too restrictive, appropriate can be relaxed.
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In the process of children's growth, we should continue to reason with children, and we should also let children understand more things, so that children can grow up better, and at the same time, there can be more changes.
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Parents must lead by example, must choose different rules according to the different personalities of their children, must motivate their children, and should reward their children in a timely manner.
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As the saying goes, there are no rules, there is no square circle, children have no sense of rules when they are young, and they are often easy to do wrong things, and in most cases, they are not aware of their mistakes, so parents should consciously help children establish a sense of rules when they are young, set rules for children to restrain children's behavior, and help children to be a person of good moral character.
When children are young, their earnest ability and understanding ability are not very strong, so for parents' words, sometimes they can't understand it at all, and their self-control is not strong, so parents must make it clear to their children when they set rules for their children, and they should be appropriately simple, because if it is too difficult, children will not be able to comply, but will make children very confused. When parents set rules for their children, they should clearly tell their children what to do, such as cleaning their own rooms, no garbage on the ground, clothes must be put in the wardrobe and hung up, etc., these must be clearly explained to the children.
When parents can set rules for their children, they must clearly establish a sense of rewards and punishments for their children, and tell them what will happen if the rules are not achieved? We should give the child a clear standard, let the child know what to do, when the child does better, parents should give the child a certain reward in a timely manner. But if the child does not do it, parents should punish the child, and punish it in time, because the child's memory is relatively poor and it is very easy to forget, parents must punish the child when the child does something wrong, so that the child can remember it for a long time.
Many parents are very resistant to their children, and feel that they are very aggrieved, parents, at this time, must clearly explain the reason to their children, tell their children that these things are for the good of their children, and use a peaceful tone and respect for their children's attitude, so that children believe in themselves, so that they can seriously abide by the rules.
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When the child is about 5 years old, it is necessary to set rules for the child, tell the child what to do and what not to do, let the child know the importance of the rules, do things in strict accordance with the rules, and pay attention to the rules with the child, so that the child will abide by it.
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There are rules that can be set according to the child's requirements, which can help the child to become better. First of all, we should pay attention to the child's degree of completion, follow the child's opinion, pay attention to the child's opinion when formulating, and pay attention to the child's personality characteristics.
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There must be rules for doing things at home, parents should establish a good concept of education, and they should have principles in doing things themselves, so that they can set rules for their children.
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