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A person's view of the world is based on her experience, and if she has really experienced a lot of good things, you don't need to say that she is also very positive and optimistic. If she doesn't experience those good things personally, it's just that you tell her that the world is good, she can't feel it, it's useless. You can only provide some perspective on the problem, and whether you adopt it or not is not how much you say, but how much she can feel the empathy.
If one day she wins the lottery and her crush writes her a love letter, and her parents tell her to take her on a trip to Singapore, Malaysia and Thailand tomorrow, she will definitely not be pessimistic and misanthropic in an instant. At this time, you tell her that the essence of life is to constantly overcome one difficulty after another, and she will also feel that this is meaningless, how can there be so many difficulties to overcome hahahahahaha, I used to not think about it for the time being, but now I want to open it.
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My advice to you is to cultivate your own interests, people say that the smell is the same, and this is also the truth, there will be more friends with a few interests, such as fitness, running, reading, etc. Drinking and smoking are not recommended, it is not good for the body! Look at your strong body, will you feel inferior, you will be more confident, friends cheer to change yourself! When many people mention emotions such as pessimism, sadness, and lost love, it is as terrible as having a terminal illness.
Everybody thinks that "I'm really bad, I'm the worst person in the world" is neither true nor helpful. Try to accept this emotion first, and when pessimism comes, at least you don't be afraid and don't add fuel to the fire.
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Is this pessimistic mood really daily pessimism, or is it underlying depression? This must be noted, if it is just a negative complaint every day, you can give him guidance, if it is depression then take her to the doctor, if he wants to talk, listen and try not to say much.
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Such people do not need comfort. We always want others to be as positive and hopeful about the world as we are, but why do we have to do that? You just need to listen to her opinion, even if she is pessimistic and misanthropic, then it doesn't matter, then continue to be misanthropic, why do you have to be optimistic.
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Don't be friends with her anymore. If you are full of negative energy all the time, your heart is not strong, and it is easy to be infected, to be her friend, you must have a strong inside. Moreover, she is easy to vent everything on you with negative energy.
If you think it's just temporary, then distance yourself for a while, and then be together again when she's normal.
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There is always something that will cause you this emotion, find the source and see what the cause is. For example, I have a friend who is always not in a good mood and asks him if he is unhappy, and he says no. Later, after chatting, I learned that he was a left-behind child, so naturally he would have a certain sense of distance and insecurity when interacting with others.
If you just say "I'm insecure, help me, what should I do", it's really hard for people to help you, and finding the reason is at least in the right direction.
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If you are really friends, go down with her and face it together. The premise is that your heart is strong enough, if not, then it is better to distance yourself for a while. Then come back to her when you're strong.
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For the vast majority of you, it's better not to enlighten, what he needs is not enlightenment, it's to give up attachment and desire. If you don't enlighten and become more pessimistic than him, maybe he will enlighten you.
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I really feel the same way when it comes to this issue. I have a friend who can be said to be moody, very pessimistic and negative every day, and takes pleasure in hitting others and pouring cold water on all kinds of things. She is very glassy, others can't persuade her, and if she persuades, she will be very disgusted, and words like not wanting to live often appear in the circle of friends.
I can actually understand that most of her family environment and childhood experiences are caused by her family environment. So I tried my best to comfort her, tolerate her, and be considerate of her, but I was really tired. I also thought about how to dissolve this friendship, but I didn't know how to say it.
Besides, we belong to a relationship where we see each other every day, and I don't think it's good to say this, I .........I was really hesitant and confused.
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Have you ever thought that you can see her now because of how much trust she has in you? I'm also an extroverted girl, very independent, and it seems to outsiders that I'm the goddess of the iceberg. But only those close to me can see that I also have moments of vulnerability, entanglement, and even pessimism and misanthropy.
If you are willing to stay by my side, please still tolerate me and support me when you see the scars behind my glossy.
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To get along with pessimistic girlfriends, you must pay attention to ways and means, because getting along will be more tiring and there will be a lot of trouble, so you must have more support and understanding, and I will share a few ways to get along with each other below.
1. Don't be drawn into their aura.
When facing people with strong negative energy, it is easy to be swept into the vortex of negative energy. But restrain yourself, and restraining yourself does not mean ignoring the other person, but maintaining the emotional distance between you. Negative people love to exaggerate the facts, always thinking about the negative side of things and ignoring the positive side.
Don't try to make the other person realize how negative they are (which will only lead to arguments, and in the end he will think, look, everyone is the opposite of me), just perfunctory with vague phrases like "okay" or "I got it." ”
2. Give sufficient understanding and support.
If you notice someone's negative side for the first time, be a listener and help appropriately. Everyone has times when they're in a bad mood or just need a push. It's hard to tell if the person is a negative person or just happened to be unlucky.
If the other person keeps chattering about the same, it means that it is time for you to get out of his negative energy vortex.
3. Try to alleviate the other party's negative emotions.
If the other person has been complaining about a fixed topic, such as work or relationships, change to a more innocuous topic. Don't try to play the role of a psychiatrist when you're swearing at a friend who is swearing unfairness, try to switch to a light-hearted topic, such as an upcoming outing, or a birthday that is coming up. Talk about a movie you watched recently, or something about a mutual friend.
Try to be light-hearted and enjoyable.
My colleague is also an introverted and pessimistic person, so in the process of getting along with him, I will give him a lot of understanding, let him do everything, and do not have conflicts and conflicts with him, because I know that he has special pain in his heart and needs support.
Everyone's personality is different, so it is not easy for people to get along with others, or you should be more patient, more generous, you can get along, if you really can't get along together, there is no way, you can only choose to stay away, don't let yourself be miserable because of the other party!
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In the same way, you can show him your positive and optimistic attitude, and guide your friend to look at things from an optimistic point of view, after he has expressed his negative emotions, guide him to think about it from the other side, drive his optimistic mood, drive him a few more times, he will also think on his own, and it will definitely improve.
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Be sure to keep a distance from each other, at this time you must be calm, and do not be affected by others when encountering anything, otherwise it will affect your mood and your mental state.
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Stay away from each other, you can take each other to participate in some activities often, you can go out on a trip, and let the other person come out of the pessimistic mood.
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Summary. Hello dear, what should I do if my friend is too pessimistic, try to take it out to play. 1. If a person holds it at home for too long, he will grow hair in his thoughts!
Therefore, in order to enlighten the other party, you can take him out for more travel! Since they are good friends, two people sign up for a group together, or travel by car. Choosing a destination with a charming view that allows him to appreciate a different scenery may open his mind.
2. Affirm his merits. The friend is so negative, the key is to not find a sense of accomplishment. As a friend, of course you should praise each other a lot!
But praising the other party is also skillful, and it should be praised to the point, to the other party's heart, and to the place where the other party longs for others to affirm themselves! 3. Talk about topics he is good at. In order to give him hope for life, you can talk to him more.
And when chatting, it's best to talk more about topics that he likes and is good at, so that he will have more say and talk endlessly. It's also a form of venting.
Kiss! Hello, a rubber blessing, a rolling warmth, a touch. Have a grateful heart.
Life is full of touching! Your question has been received, it will take a little time to type, please be patient and do not end the consultation. You can also take this time to provide more useful information so that I can answer for you.
Hello dear, what should I do if my friend is too pessimistic, try to take it out to play. 1. If a person holds it at home for too long, he will grow hair in his thoughts! Therefore, in order to enlighten the other party, you can take him out for more travel!
Since they are good friends, the two of them will sign up for a group or travel by car. Choose a destination, and ask for the kind of scenery that is very charming, so that he can appreciate the different scenery, and maybe open his heart. 2. Affirm his merits.
The friend is so negative, the key is to not find a sense of accomplishment. As a friend of the air, of course you should praise each other more! But praising the other party is also skillful, and it should be praised to the point, to the other party's heart, and to the place where the other party longs for others to affirm themselves!
3. Talk about topics he is good at. In order to give him hope for life, you can talk to him more. And when chatting, it's best to talk more about topics that he likes and is good at, so that he will have more say and talk endlessly.
It's also a form of venting.
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Many netizens will reflect that there is a good friend who is particularly pessimistic, so when facing some of his more pessimistic confessions, we can choose to respond to him in the following way.
01 Positive and optimistic attitude.
If it were me, I would definitely use some more positive and optimistic attitude to influence him and infect him. If he feels very depressed because of something, then I will help him analyze it and tell him that there are actually many benefits and positive meanings for him, so that the impact of this incident on him will gradually fade. I will also give him some more positive examples to guide him, so that he can also develop in a positive direction and solve problems better.
02 Be patient.
First of all, when we meet such a friend, we must be patient enough when he confides in you his pessimistic emotions. Patience is very important because:Patience is needed when solving anything, and if the other person feels your care and patience with him, he will be more willing to open up and accept your advice. Having enough patience is also manifested in whether we can comprehensively and deeply analyze what the incident that makes the friend sad means to the friend, and how he understands it in the eyes and hearts of the friend, and from what direction.
Only when we clearly know and understand the cause and effect of the matter and the culprit that causes our friend's pessimistic mood can we better help our friend solve the problems he encounters, so as to release his emotions.
03 Be rational enough.
When we meet this kind of friend and pass on our pessimistic emotions, we must be rational enough. Don't feel pessimistic with your friend because of his pessimism. On the contrary, we need to guide him to think in the right way.
If we are as pessimistic as he is, then he may be even more pessimistic and get into the horns of the bull himself.
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In fact, such a person is very easy to get along with, she is only a short period of emotional pessimism, maybe she encounters some problems that she can't think of, as long as you come forward to comfort and enlighten at this time, you will become a friend she treats with heart!
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You should face that pessimistic friend with a sympathetic attitude, and then comfort the other party with your heart, comfort his emotions through the other party's perspective, and slowly calm his mood.
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In fact, in the face of a friend who is emotionally pessimistic, you must use your positive attitude towards life to infect him and make him happy.
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In the face of such a friend, then you should first comfort him with your heart, and care about the other party with a very sympathetic attitude, so that you can stabilize the other party's emotions and not be so excited.
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I think you can treat him to a big meal, a few glasses of wine, release your stress and emotions, and don't have to say too many comforting words, just accompany him.
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