What should parents do if they don t tolerate their children s negative emotions?

After all, it is a family, you can be more tolerant, if you don't want to listen or if you don't like it, you can find more friends to come out and chat and play, and relax, there is no need to stay at home every day and listen to them, the most important thing is to be happy.

Personally, I think parents should not tolerate their children's negative emotions at all, because every time you tolerate your child, it is likely that it will be difficult for him to gain a foothold in society in the future, so when he goes to society, no one will tolerate his negative emotions, so it is best to treat it with a peaceful mind.

The advantage of not being accustomed to children is that he will not be willful when he grows up, because the disadvantages of the habits he has developed since childhood are that he is more psychologically stressed, and his emotions can only be digested by himself.

There shouldn't be people who tolerate negative emotions in the first place, they are all family members, why should there be negative emotions? Every home is our warm harbor, everyone should encourage each other, give everyone a happy feeling, this is home, so children are different, and there should be no negative emotions.

Today's parents only think about their children's learning, but they never ask their children's emotions, how their children are in a mood today, adults will only say that there is something tiring about studying, why don't you just do the classroom and listen to the lectures, do the questions, we are tired from working outside all day, and the children are also very tired, and you adults only have grades in your eyes!!

Whether it is a child or an adult, it is inevitable to encounter setbacks in life and inevitably have negative emotions. If the child copes with these negative emotions properly, then these negative emotions cannot affect the child's life; If your child's emotional control is too poor, it can have serious consequences and even hurt other people or things. So parents should pay attention:

1 Parents need to accept their children's negative emotions.

What a person needs most when he has negative emotions is someone who can understand, someone who can listen, and someone who can give emotional acceptance and support, rather than providing advice too quickly and too early, nor saying some empty words of comfort with no actual content.

The negative emotions that children show in their lives are actually just a way for children to express themselves, don't imagine how serious they are. But we often say, "Don't be like this, why are you so ignorant."

In fact, saying this is tantamount to denying the child's bad feelings. Instead of making the child's negative emotions disappear, this will encourage the child's depression and denial, which will cause harm to the child.

Parents should remain calm when facing their children's negative emotions. Many times, although you love your child in your heart, because you are too angry, you show complete denial and blame, which will make your child ignore the content of your speech and pay attention to your emotions. For example, your child is already annoyed that he did not do well in the exam and is thinking of ways to improve, but you are angry and scold him.

At this time, the child's attention will shift from "not doing well in the test" to "mom is angry". Hope that helps.

When a child has this kind of behavior, the main thing is to attract the attention of parents, at this time we should pay more attention to the child's emotions, and more importantly, see how the parents guide them correctly.

To quote a passage that Xinhe's teacher once said in class: When children look the most unlovable, it is when they need love the most. When a child loses his temper, the parents' handling of it hides what the child's future will look like.

Finally, don't forget to hug the tantrum child and tell them: it's okay, Mom and Dad will always love you.

I hope you find this brief sharing helpful.

Parents' emotions are often affected by their children's bad moods as well, for example, parents may become angry or anxious when they see their children throwing tantrums incessantly. In this way, it will not help the child and may cause more harm.

If parents can easily face their children's negative emotions, it is not only beneficial to the parents themselves, but also conducive to resolving their children's negative emotions. So, how can you face it more easily?

First of all, treat negativity and see its positive significance.

We need to recognize that negative emotions are normal, indispensable, and positive in life. Negativity is a reminder when we are threatened and hurt so that we can know when to protect ourselves. Especially for younger children, it is in line with human nature and normal to show emotions and emotions without concealment.

It's actually a good thing for everyone to be able to express negative emotions so that they don't have a backlog of emotions that lead to physical and mental health problems.

When you see your child have negative emotions, allow them to express them, and be aware of their emotional state in time, if they feel bad, calm their emotions first, the following methods can help you relax and calm down quickly.

Breathing exercises. The easiest and quickest way is to breathe in the abdomen, like a baby's breath, inhale deeply through your nose to make your abdomen bulge, and when you exhale, exhale slowly through your mouth so that your abdomen slowly falls. If you want to feel the changes in your abdomen, you can place one hand on it.

Muscle relaxation. When you are nervous, you will notice that certain parts of your body will tighten. At this point, you can deliberately tighten these areas a little more, and then relax.

Choose a responsive area, such as the shoulders or neck, and do the exercise. The more relaxed you are, the easier it is to cope with anxiety.

Self-talk. The root of emotions comes from our cognition, so correcting distorted cognitions can effectively alleviate negative emotions. Tell yourself:

Bad emotional experiences are caused by catastrophic thoughts in the mind, and I take them seriously, but those are not facts. There are many ways I can try to avoid bad things from happening.

In addition, parents can also guide their children's emotional expressions appropriately to help them find a more reasonable way to express themselves that suits them. I remember a picture book called "Jerry's Cool Space", which was about a little boy named Jerry who broke a clay bowl made for his father's birthday because he fell and lost his temper when he got home. Under the guidance of his mother, he built his own "calm space" and learned how to control his temper.

It can be used as a reference to find your own "calm space" for your children.

Children express negative emotions, more often than not, they want to get the attention of their parents, but most parents will feel that this is not good, can't there be a better way to express it? But have you ever thought that the child still can't express it, and parents need to teach the child how to express it.

So what to do, share what I learned in the Heart and Wisdom Parents class, the worst thing you can do as a parent is to ignore your child's bad mood. Because when a child's mood is really bad, they must be in pain. At this time, children need our love the most, but in this way.

At this time, we may wish to respect the child's emotions first, ask the cause and solve it when the child calms down, and tell the child that your mother respects but cannot accept your behavior just now, because there is a better way to express it so that we can solve the problem together. Then work with your child to make rules, give them choice, and follow the rules together.

Seeing this question reminded me of some of the things I learned in the class of Wise Parents of Heart and Heart, which made me understand that in fact, the family environment has the greatest impact on the development of children's personality, and the parenting style and attitude of parents have an important impact on the formation of children's personality.

Many parents have a misconception that they think, why do children do this? Usually children do not lose their temper and vent their emotions for no reason. When it is found that the child is more emotional, as a parent, we must pay attention to it, guide it correctly, find a way to guide the child in time, and ignore it will only be the child's bad character.

I think the best way to deal with such negative emotions in children is for parents to talk to their children as friends. In this way, the child will be able to better understand some of the parents' thoughts.

For children's negative emotions, as parents, they should educate their children correctly, not criticize, and praise their children more.

Talk to him, know what his crux is, and help him unravel.

There are many parents who are reluctant to accept that their children have negative emotions because they feel that their children should listen to them honestly. This kind of parent actually has an arbitrary character, parents have a particularly strong ability to control their children, and parents hope that their children's every move can be controlled by themselves. This kind of education is actually very wrong, because parents have no way to completely control the child's emotions, and there is no way to completely control the child.

If parents make some excessive control over their children when educating them, then it is easy to cause corresponding problems in children at this time.

Therefore, parents must remember to guide their children correctly, and let their children slowly overcome their negative emotions in the process, rather than forcibly asking their children not to have negative emotions, because negative emotions are everyone's freedom. Just as parents often have negative emotions, parents also need to understand their children's negative emotions as much as possible.

Children themselves have negative emotions, if parents still force the child to change their negative emotions, then the child is likely to feel very uncomfortable, in the process of the child's personal ability will also be affected accordingly. Therefore, parents should not let their children not allow negative emotions, but should slowly help their children to resolve their children's negative emotions, which will be more helpful to children.

When educating children, parents should choose to bring better education to their children, and bring more positive guidance to their children, in this case, the children's personal abilities will be improved accordingly, and parents can also change the negative emotions of their children. The negative emotions of children will make the children themselves feel very uncomfortable, and if parents still blame the children at this time, it will seem a little inhumane.

Parents can't accept that their children have negative emotions, because parents have cognitive problems, too high requirements for their children, and don't know how to educate their children, so they don't allow their children to have this kind of emotions.

There are three main negative emotional harms: first, it is not conducive to the growth of children; Second, under the influence of negative emotions, the child's efficiency in completing homework or other tasks will definitely be greatly reduced; The third is that emotions can be contagious, especially in the shadow of negative emotions, and parents will also become emotionally bad, not to mention that it is not conducive to rational guidance of children.

It is because parents have high requirements for their children, hoping that they can become talents and become excellent people, and do not want them to say that they are at the starting line, so they cannot accept that their children have negative emotions.

How to unconditionally accept children's negative emotions, the famous psychological master Satya has made a lot of observations on how parents should deal with children's negative emotions, and found that for emotional learning, parents often do not have the time and patience, and can not learn from their children to walk, so that children can experience falls, injuries, and feel pain in such a process of learning. So what is the right thing to unconditionally accept your child's negative emotions? The main points are as follows.

Clause. 1. Empathize with your child. To put it simply, it is to stand in the child's perspective, stop useless ignorance, denial, preaching, etc., and put yourself in the child's shoes to understand the child's sadness, sadness and other negative emotions, you will know that the child's crying is the release of his inner contradictions and conflicts, not a bad thing.

Give your child time and space to vent their emotions. The child's willingness to express his true feelings in front of his parents also reflects his trust in his parents to a certain extent. If parents are restless at this time, avoid or immediately let the child change his emotions, then the emotions will be suppressed.

It is the right thing for parents to be by their children's side, to give them time and space, to give them channels and outlets for their emotions, and to comfort them.

Clause. 2. Guide children to express their emotions reasonably. Parents need to understand what is happening around their children to find out the real reasons for their children's negative emotions, guide their children to clarify their emotions, and learn how to express them.

Clause. 3. Don't blindly criticize. When the child encounters frustration and is very depressed, parents criticize them for being useless, crying at every turn, or preventing them from saying that if they don't do well, don't do it, etc., these words are not only unhelpful for the frustration that the child suffers at that time, but also aggravate the child's frustration and affect the relationship between the child and the parents.

In fact, when children are frustrated, parents should give their children practical and useful help, for example, some children will cry after suffering setbacks, such as building blocks are not good, toy buckles are not fastened, etc., these parents can say, we try to see if it is good in this way, or we adjust it a little, change the angle, so as to see if it works. These suggestions are practical and helpful for children.