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After having children, why couples are prone to divorce is nothing more than the following:
After giving birth to a baby, Bao Ma.
We are facing the first hurdle - postpartum depression.
Their body is weak and needs to be recovered, breast milk has not been put down for a long time, the baby is always crying and I don't know why, and I often wake up at night and I am exhausted, these factors often make the mother feel unspeakably hard. Plus estrogen in the body after unloading.
Declines, endocrine changes can easily cause low mood. It's easy to be impulsive and it's easier to get divorced;
After giving birth to a baby, Bao's father participated in child-rearing affairs less, and Bao's mother felt isolated and helpless, and felt hopeless. After having a child, especially a novice mother, must be in a hurry, if the father does not participate at this time, and is still an outsider who stands by and watches, the mother will inevitably be disappointed or even desperate. Mourning is greater than dying, once Bao's mother doesn't have any hope for Bao's father, there will be a crisis in marriage.
After having a baby, the old man came to help bring the baby, and the contradictions between the three generations living together intensified, the husband did not coordinate well, and the face glue was not done. There are many couples who live alone in the marital house after getting married, and their parents are in their hometown. After giving birth to a baby, in order to facilitate the care, the in-laws will come from their hometown to live with the young couple.
Three generations live under the same roof, because of different living habits and ways of raising babies, there will inevitably be conflicts and disputes.
The increase in the cost of living has led to increased stress for the man. Due to the soaring housing prices in recent years, severe inflation, and the higher cost of living after childbirth, some women are unable to work due to the need to take care of children, resulting in a decrease in income. The man will be under a lot of pressure, and if the man does not have a good financial background, there will often be family conflicts, which will eventually lead to divorce.
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Because after the husband and wife have children, it is easy to have conflicts because of some things about the children, whether it is education issues or ordinary life problems, there will be some different opinions, so there will be a lot of contradictions, and it is easy to form a divorce phenomenon over time!
When we are in real life, the average woman takes care of the children more, but now women also go out to work, they will feel some imbalance in their hearts, when the man returns home and does nothing, the woman will feel particularly wronged, so she will quarrel with the man, so that the relationship between the two people will be damaged, which further contributes to the divorce.
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The couple gave birth to a child, and the wife seems to have taken full responsibility for childbirth, but since the birth of the child, the husband is facing very much financial pressure, and there is still so much money. The mutual incomprehension between the two sides can easily cause friction and contradictions. If this contradiction is not resolved well, it may lead to the breakdown of the marriage.
In these young families, due to the poor handling of the status of the relationship between husband and wife and the parent-child relationship, the child becomes a third party in the relationship between husband and wife, and eventually leads to the breakdown of the marital relationship.
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It's no surprise that after having children, we often feel tired, have frequent mood swings, and overreact to the trivial things in life. We seem to have become a person we all hate, lifeless, unsmiling, and extremely critical of those around us, including our partners and children. Caring for a child can be a difficult challenge, both physically and mentally.
Parents often sleep less and have no time to exercise and socialize. Although the husband and wife are under the same roof, everyone's emotional communication is surprisingly rare. Slowly, we drift away from a healthy lifestyle, and our marriage becomes a red light.
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My husband also had thoughts of divorce when the child was less than a year old, on the grounds that it was not interesting. I just hated at the time, and I had all kinds of resentment. Looking back now, he couldn't blame him for thinking like that back then.
Before we had children, we were in pairs, looking forward to our children together, and felt that we were happier when we had children. It's just that after having a child, all the energy of being a mother is on the child, one is nature, the other is that the workload and intensity of being a mother are full of challenges and pressure, and even feeding the child is an extremely tiring thing, every day is sore, and there is really not much energy in the relationship between husband and wife, and I feel that my husband is the same as myself, and he is wholeheartedly in dealing with the child. I really don't know that the man doesn't think so, he feels that he is abandoned, no one pays attention, no one pays attention.
If the father can understand the pressure and challenges of being a new mother and feel his own feelings and feel the other person, the new mother can also express his expectations for the father after having a child, which will help solve the problem.
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The focus of the couple's concern shifted to the child, and the communication between the husband and wife was not smooth. Men do things roughly, and they have little patience with children, which can easily lead to dissatisfaction with their wives. After giving birth, a woman's emotions become irritable due to the fatigue of taking care of the child, and she scolds her husband and the people around her.
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After having children, my husband and I have had more than many fights. Because before having children, the two were more prosperous and free in terms of energy, time, economy and other aspects than after having children. After having children, the pressure on all aspects will increase, and there is not much time for the world of two, and a quiet rest after work may become a luxury.
Energy is lacking, economic pressure has increased sharply, and problems in all aspects have become prominent.
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Empathize, after having a child, the mother's attention is on the child. A pregnant stupid three years, the night with the child rest is not good, lack of concentration, the spirit is also scattered, the next day to work dragged the tired body, need to deal with pressure from all sides, on the one hand, will feel that they can not keep up with the rhythm, discouraged, self-denial, and then produce anxious emotions. On the other hand, all the discomfort can not find a suitable vent point, before the two of them can say anything, now there are elderly people at home, can not easily show negative energy, in front of the child mother is more optimistic, positive, transmit positive energy.
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Because after the birth of the child, the division of labor between the husband and wife is refined, and there is no area of integration, the child seems to have become a woman's job, while modern women have a professional job, and raising children has become another job for women, and the less men participate in family affairs, the more conflicts between husband and wife.
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In fact, many times, it is not because the relationship has weakened, but after having children, you will spend more time and energy on the children, and sometimes you will ignore the feelings of the other party. So while taking care of your children, don't forget that your lover also needs your love, so that the love will last longer.
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After having a baby, the balance of the two-person world was suddenly broken, and the two people no longer paid attention to each other in their eyes, and the mother's focus shifted to the baby, physically and mentally exhausted feeding, putting and urine, serving this little ancestor, as if the outside time was isolated outside the door, and sometimes the kind of loneliness and coldness that made people shiver, only then did I remember that now I can rely on Dad, but Dad doesn't know whether he is pretending to be stupid at this time, or really eating stupid for a while, Hengzhu just didn't understand his mother's feelings at the moment, and he was so stingy that he was reluctant to give his mother a hug, and even complained that his mother didn't understand his hard work.
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In the family structure, men are the cornerstone, women are arms, and children are the bonds, and the birth of a child will bring vitality to the family at the same time, it will also bring invisible pressure to the family, normal.
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When couples are divorced, they will definitely consider their children, especially women, their first consideration is their children, unless they reach the last resort, otherwise they will not choose to divorce.
Many couples will not divorce because of their children, but in today's society, many parents have the idea that they have the right to pursue their own happiness and will not affect themselves because of their children, so they will not consider their children when they divorce.
Children are very important to everyone, a family with children is a complete family, and many people hope that their children will be able to live a better life in the future when they run a family. But there will also be some problems when the husband and wife are in business, and if the business is not good, they will think about divorce.
For women, the last step they want to take is divorce, after the divorce, they will lose this marriage, and the children will become helpless, women can make do with it, and they will not easily say divorce, but men are different, they will decisively divorce when they want to divorce.
When many people get divorced, they will take their children into account, and we will find such a phenomenon, that is, the divorce rate of parents on the day the college entrance examination ends.
It is the highest day, and it is because parents consider their children that they will delay the divorce until the end of the college entrance examination, because they are afraid that the divorce will affect the children's grades, and they will never divorce if they have children in their hearts.
But for parents, their marriage is really unmanageable, and they will choose to divorce, because they know that two people will not be happy even if they are reluctant, it is better to let go as soon as possible and let each other pursue life again, and now that the children have grown up, they will have the courage to choose divorce.
But as a parent, don't divorce casually, because what children want most is a complete family, and your divorce will only traumatize the child's heart.
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I don't think divorced people think about children at all, because if you really care about children, you can't get divorced.
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The children were not considered at all, and if the children had been considered, the two would not have divorced and there would have been no divorce in the future.
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If you really choose to divorce, you must have considered the children, divorce is a big deal for anyone, and you will not make a hasty decision.
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Some couples also considered their children when they divorced, and it was also because the children finally gave up the divorce and ended up living in a mess.
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After thinking about it, the relationship between the two people has come to an end, and there is no way to continue living, so they will divorce.
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Couples are more likely to quarrel when bringing a baby, mainly for the following reasons:
1.Parenting is stressful, and energy and emotions are easily consumed. Bringing a baby requires a lot of time and energy, and it is easy to produce fatigue and emotional exhaustion, which will increase the probability of friction and conflict.
2.There are differences in parenting concepts, and there are many disagreements. There may be differences in the concepts, methods and requirements of the husband and wife on parenting, and it is more likely to have differences of opinion and disputes in the specific process of raising a baby.
3.Lifestyle habits change, and it needs to be run-in. After having a baby, the original life rhythm and habits of the husband and wife will change greatly, and it takes time to run in and adapt, which is also one of the reasons for frequent quarrels.
4.Communication decreases, intimacy decreases. Excessive consumption of time and energy with a baby, reduced opportunities for couples to be alone, insufficient emotional expression and communication, easy to produce estrangement and uneasiness, and exacerbate conflicts.
6.Private space shrinks, making collisions more likely. With a baby, couples will have less space for private conversations and will need to spend more time in the same room, which will increase the frequency of communication and disagreement in daily life.
Therefore, in general, couples are more likely to quarrel when bringing a baby, mainly due to factors such as high parenting pressure, differences in concepts, the need for run-in of life changes, reduced communication, unclear division of responsibilities, and reduction of personal space. The combination of these factors increases the amount of time couples spend together, the chances of disagreement, and at the same time reduces the opportunities for normal communication and emotional expression, which ultimately leads to the accumulation of conflicts and more frequent quarrels.
To improve the situation, couples need to be aware of these influencing factors, strengthen communication and understanding, clarify the division of responsibilities, ensure private space, and reach a high degree of agreement on parenting concepts. Only when couples reach a higher degree of consensus on all aspects of parenting and strengthen normal emotional communication, this situation is likely to be well improved, so that divorce becomes a smaller probability event in the process of raising a baby.
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Here's an answer to that question for you. First of all, it is easy for couples to quarrel after bringing a baby. The reason is that no one wants to listen to each other in all kinds of small things, and they all want to have the final say.
In fact, the solution is also very simple, to designate a person responsible for this matter. Those responsible can make decisions, but they also have to take responsibility. It is normal for couples to quarrel with their babies in life, and they are both inexperienced parents for the first time.
First of all, after the husband and wife have children, their lives will change drastically. The original two-person world will become a family of three, and some couples are slow to adapt to this mode of getting along with a family of three, so there will be a lot of unaccustomed and unsuitable places in life, and conflicts and quarrels will inevitably occur between husband and wife at this time.
The second is that the birth of a child will increase the financial pressure and life pressure between the husband and wife. Raising a child requires a huge cost, especially for children, milk powder, diapers and other reputations such as all kinds of consumables, if the original life of two people is very poor, the birth of a child will undoubtedly make the life of two people worse, all say that poor couples mourn, naturally will intensify the contradiction between two people.
In fact, the impact of family harmony on children is very huge, for their children, husband and wife, should learn to restrain each other's emotions, learn to care for and tolerate each other, manage their marriage well, do not quarrel in front of their children, and give their children a good and warm family atmosphere. I hope I can help the brigade meet friends in need.
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