Why do some people have a phobia of marriage?

I have a phobia of marriage, let's take it personally. 1. I have seen on the news that there are many divorces and marital breakdowns after marriage, so I don't trust marriage. And I don't have a boyfriend now, and I guess it's a blind date when I get married in the future, so I don't believe how sincere the other party will be to me.

2. I see a lot, before getting married, the man's parents were very good to the woman, but after getting married, everything was wrong. So, I'm quite afraid of meeting a bad mother-in-law. 3. In your own family, you are very relaxed and comfortable, but you are not so comfortable when you marry into the man's family, and you must do everything diligently.

4, after getting married, to have children, to raise children, to have children, to have children seems to be very painful, I am afraid... 5. If the man's home is too far away, he can't see his parents often when he gets married, he doesn't like to be too far away from home, and he has no sense of security. In fact, I think there are many more, and I will say so much about myself.

One of my relatives had a child in her thirties and didn't want to get married, she had been divorced for many years, she raised the child by herself, and hoped that the child would get married as soon as possible.

How terrible is the shadow of marital fear left by the actions of parents in the hearts of children in their early years!

Many boys and girls alike suffer from the symptom of "premarital phobia" before they get married, and they don't even know it when they get it.

So what are the symptoms that can be seen from the side that a girl has suffered from marriage phobia?

What are the causes of the disease?

1. Symptoms of premarital phobia.

Symptom 1: When a man talks to a girl about marriage at a certain point, the girl often changes the topic or avoids it directly, wanting to put off the marriage again and again.

Symptom 2: Even if the girl agrees to get married, she shows a very negative attitude towards getting married, and sometimes she will make trouble when the boy is preparing for marriage, which makes the process of marriage slow, and some even regret the marriage when they are about to get married.

Symptom 3: I often use work or other things to numb myself and make myself not think about getting married.

Symptom 4: Deliberately avoiding relatives and friends, worrying that relatives and friends will congratulate you or ask about the progress of marriage preparations.

2. The reason for the fear of collapse and marriage syndrome.

1. The urging of relatives and friends to give birth to a rebellious mentality.

Many girls get married because they are old enough to get married, but they are not willing to get married so early, and their relatives and friends are around every day to urge them to get married. This is very likely to make girls rebellious, the more you urge me to get married, the less I will get married so early, which will directly lead to girls suffering from premarital phobia.

2. Worry about not being able to balance work and family.

Unlike before, many girls are now able to have a stable job and be able to work to support themselves or even have a better life. After getting married, you have to work and take care of your family, and if you want to have children, you will have to take a break from work for a while, which may have a very big impact on your future.

3. There is less and less time for freedom.

After getting married, you have to continue to work and do housework, take care of your parents-in-law, and take care of your children after giving birth, working during the day and breastfeeding at night, so that your life has no leisure. I can't go to the shopping I usually like, and I don't go to the party where my girlfriends dress up and balance anymore, and a series of things take up my free time.

4. I am worried that the relationship with my mother-in-law is not good.

Many girls have seen too many mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationships in society who get along very poorly, resulting in worrying about whether they can get along well with their future mother-in-law, and they want to change from a little princess to a good daughter-in-law, and strive to maintain the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

"Marital phobia" is a long-term, abnormal, and unrealistic fear of marriage or intimacy.

As for why there is a fear of marriage, there are the following psychological reasons:

1) Trauma in childhood.

Every kind of constant intimidation, in the final analysis, can be found in the boredom of childhood to the epitome.

It is generally believed in modern science that fear of a thing can be traced back to external trauma and internal heredity.

The reason why marriage-phobes are full of fear of marriage is probably because most of them have been hurt by their parents and family in childhood, and they are extremely unconfident in marriage and do not believe in love.

Marriage-phobic people often say that they are emotionally traumatized or have the shadow of their parents' marriage breaking down.

Therefore, many people are afraid that they will have the same experience as their original family in marriage. Therefore, the fear of contact with the opposite sex and the fear of establishing intimate relationships is actually a manifestation of insecurity and fear of abandonment.

2) Don't dare to face responsibility.

Many people have been single for a long time, feel free, do not get married, have no children, and have no constraints.

In fact, it's not that they really hate marriage, it's just that there are too many unknown variables hidden in marriage, which they really can't accept and passively change.

What's more, it's easy to fall in love and difficult to get married, there are no economic conditions, few people dare to get married, the pressure is too great, it's too scary.

In the traditional ideology of the Chinese people, marriage is to perpetuate hope and pass on the lineage. There are only melons and seeds, and there are no children and melons, and the overwhelming response to married life has discouraged many people. Sedan Kai.

All of this is really just two words: "escape".

People who dare not marry because of fear and avoidance have also become members of the army of marriage-phobia, just because they don't want to take their responsibilities and retreat again and again.

In the end, they may not be able to withstand the strong demands of their relatives and find someone to marry hastily, but most of those marriages end in unhappiness.

3) Fear that there is no love in the marriage.

Would you choose a relationshipless marriage?

I'm sure many people's answer is no!

A marriage without love is even hard to speak, and getting along without feelings is a dream along with a bed.

It is always said that marriage is the grave of love. This quote also serves as a reason for an ideal lover to refuse to marry in pursuit of true love.

How easy it is to fall in love! The happiness of the two people is pure and beautiful, not mixed with all kinds of trivial things in life, and it does not involve the details between the two families. It's just that two people have come together because of feelings and hormones.

But this is not a fear of marriage, it is a fear of growing up.

I was scared by the unhappy marriage around me, and then I didn't want to take responsibility! In the end, I am not sure if I really love each other.

1.Fear of commitment: For some people, marriage is a major commitment, and they are unsure if they are ready for it and fear losing their freedom and independence.

2.Fear of failure: Marriage can be beautiful, but at the same time, there are some possibilities of failure and contradictions, some people may be afraid of failure or face the problems in the marriage, and it may even affect their life and career.

3.Suspicion of their partner: Sometimes, some people are hesitant to enter into marriage because they lack trust in their partner or doubt their loyalty.

4.Economic factors: Some people may believe that financial stability is very important for marriage, and they may worry that getting married will bring financial stress and uncertainty to themselves.

5.Differences in personal perceptions: Hesitation and uneasiness may arise when two people have very different perceptions and ideas, including lifestyles and personal values.

6.Family background: Some people may come from broken families or have parents who are marital discord, which can cause them to be skeptical about marriage.

7.Age and life history: Some people may be hesitant to feel scared or uncertain about their age or past experiences.

8.Idealized thoughts: Some people may have overly high or unrealistic idealistic ideas and may hesitate if their partner doesn't match their ideas.

9.Different marital expectations: Some people may have different expectations for marriage, have their own special requirements, and may be at odds with their partner, which may also lead to hesitation.

10.Other reasons for uncertainty: Some people do not want to enter into marriage for no clear reason, and may only feel uncertain, which is also common.

There are usually several factors that contribute to marital fear.

The first is caused by factors related to family relationships. Such factors are mainly due to the divorce of parents, or the poor living conditions of parents, which have left a shadow on their childhood, forming a fear and sensitivity to life.

The second is the frustration of emotional experience. Such a factor is usually due to the fact that I did not handle and grasp the previous relationship well.

Third, the influence of surrounding environmental factors. Before everyone enters marriage, they are affected by the life concepts of the people around them, and then become the standard of their future life, when the surrounding environment is full of bad feelings and marriages, full of bad thoughts and attitudes to life, they will fear that they will encounter the same thing in the future.

Fourth, a relationship is not yet mature. Such factors are usually that a relationship has just started and has not yet really understood each other comprehensively, but it is subject to the pressure of age and relatives around you, resulting in the choice of entering marriage when the relationship is not mature.

Expert tip: The cause of marital phobia may be because of the unhappiness of one's original family and the disharmony of the relationship between parents, which causes psychological shadows; Have had a failed emotional experience; Influenced by the life concepts of the people around them; A relationship has not yet reached the stage of maturity before entering the choice of marriage. It is recommended that patients look at examples of family happiness and change their perception of marriage.