We all have weaknesses and dark sides, so why are people so afraid to expose their vulnerable side?

In fact, not everyone really knows that people have vulnerabilities, and even if they do, they are not willing to face them. Because of some experiences, I have learned a deeper understanding of "never test human nature": don't show your dark side (or weakness) to others I don't need to cut the sentence that anyone's heart is black, to put it bluntly, whoever cuts it is a little black, and it's just a matter of how black it is Bury these things in your heart, don't tell others, these things are said, parents may not understand, friends may disdain I remember writing a pretty hypocritical mood before:

Some people, when you finally muster up the courage to open your heart to them, not only will they not sympathize with them and be grateful, but they will dislike your heart for being so disgusting, and even trample on your feet with contempt.

People who are not familiar with it, will laugh when they see it, will be embarrassed, will feel that you are inappropriate, when necessary, it will be used as ** to hurt you, the person who loves you, will be silent after thinking about it, and then carefully try to comfort you with unknown words, people who understand you, even if you understand your situation and make suggestions, you can't decide for you, suffer for you, experience for you, expose the dark side to even if you love me and understand me, I really didn't get better because of this, I told them, And I feel even more painful, everyone is already hard enough to deal with their own situation, and I have to make them worry and even suffer for me, so why do you say that, no matter if you want love, understanding, or help, it is useless for the dark quagmire itself, and the quagmire of pain itself.

Because it's useless, because no matter how much others understand you, don't understand you, hurt you, and carefully try to comfort you. No matter what, the thorn in our hearts or even the knife will not be made better by any action of others, and no one who loves you or understands you will not be able to save you from the quagmire you have fallen into. Whether you're silently praying to the gods in the dark, covering your mouth and crying, or holding your loved one's hand, all of this will do nothing to get out of the quagmire.

You're still going to be bitter, you're going to be angry, you're going to be disappointed, you're going to cry, and then you're going to get through it all on your own.

In psychological counseling, it will also be found that those who are often the most painful are those who think a lot about themselves, but think less about others. For example, in marriage, people who always attach great importance to their own feelings and emotions, hope that the other party will accommodate themselves everywhere, and are self-centered, this kind of person is more domineering and rarely gives the other party a chance to speak. Of course, they also learn not to serve others and put themselves in the shoes of others, and the psychological problems that these people often have are often that they feel that others are sorry for themselves and that they lack the most love.

This extremely self-centered way of thinking is similar to that of a little baby. As long as her mother is not called by herself, she shows that she is very insecure, separated anxious, and guesses that her mother may have lost herself. They need others to love themselves the way they need to be, but they can't accept the way they need others.

When others can't learn, they may push others away in the hope of controlling them. As a result, their intimate relationships can also be prone to failure.

The secrets of the world are often accompanied by strong emotions. There are positive emotions, such as excitement, preparing gifts for surprise, and negative emotions, such as sadness, something shocking, etc. Human beings are controlled by emotions all the time, and we have the need to express and vent our emotions.

Talking to others is the best way to vent and reduce your own psychological pressure, so if you get someone else's secret, which increases your psychological pressure, it is difficult for you to control yourself from venting in certain ways.

Engaging in self-disclosure is an important social skill. We often need to share some "secrets" with others to enhance the emotional connection between the two parties, which is equivalent to a "exchange", making ourselves more easily recognized and accepted by the other party.

Zeng also as a listener wanted to say something to help the crying hoarse friend in front of him, maybe it was a stupid mouth and a panic in his heart, but in the end he couldn't say anything but gave her a hug, empathizing with this thing is easy to say, it's too difficult to do, when you fully expose your heart, maybe you can get the response you expect, maybe not, and the comfort and encouragement of others is a kind of help, and it is still yourself who really wants to stand up and come out, just like a sentence, Everyone is a lonely planet.