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My general rule of guiding children to make friends is to be friendly and honest, and my child has just entered primary school, so I must teach him this sentence.
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Honesty is very important, in the process of making friends with my children, I have been teaching children to keep their promises, so that they can get the trust of their friends, and they must be honest and trustworthy.
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I teach children to learn to be tolerant, let them know that everyone has shortcomings, everyone makes mistakes, learn to accept and be tolerant, and forgive your friends for their little mistakes.
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I don't let my child make any taunts and teases about others, tell him that he can't laugh at others, everyone has flaws, and there is nothing to laugh about in shortcomings.
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Don't hit, scold or swear, when you're angry, face it with a calm mood, and resolutely don't hit or scold people.
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I will let the child take the initiative, if the child feels shy, does not want to say hello to others, and is afraid to join the children's activities, it will affect his relationship with his classmates.
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Let your children know how to share, don't occupy toys, don't let others play, and share your toys with other children.
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I teach children to use polite, friendly language to express their needs. If some children speak impolitely, don't worry about them, just respond simply and calmly.
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I always tell my child to learn to help your friend, and when his friend is in a bad mood, see if there is a way to make him happy.
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When his friends celebrate their birthdays, I always let the children make small gifts and give them to his classmates and friends, so that the children can express some feelings from primary school.
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This is a complex issue because the impact of a child's interactions with other children varies from person to person, and aspects such as the child's age, personality, educational background, and environment should be taken into account.
From a general point of view, parents can appropriately guide their children to associate with children who have good behavior, learning attitudes and morals. After all, in the process of having fun, children may pass on information about behavior, values, beliefs, and attitudes to each other.
But with Sui, no matter who the child is dating, parents should provide enough care, support and education for their children. If there is a child who is not good at learning or has poor character who wants to socialize with the child, parents should let the child understand the other person's situation and background first, and then provide guidance and advice to the child where appropriate.
In addition, parents should also cultivate their children's ability to think and judge independently, so that children can gradually learn to choose who they associate with independently, and avoid imitation or blind obedience. In this way, children can gradually become mature people with independent thinking and behavior, and establish their own independent personality and values.
In short, parents can guide their children's social behavior appropriately, but they should be measured and not overly restrict their children's range of friends. At the same time, through the care and guidance of parents Labi, children's ability to think independently and make independent choices should be cultivated.
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Guiding children to make friends is an important task for parents, and here are some ways to guide children to make friends:
1.Teach children how to get along with others: Parents can teach their children how to respect others, understand other people's emotions, listen to others' opinions, etc., which are all basic skills for making friends.
2.Take your child to participate in social activities: Parents can take their children to participate in some social activities, such as participating in activities organized by school or community organizations, joining interest groups, etc., so that children have the opportunity to meet more people.
3.Encourage your child to communicate with others: Parents can encourage their children to communicate with their peers or others to learn about their interests and life experiences, and enhance their social skills.
4.Provide opportunities for your children: Parents can provide opportunities for their children to pay tribute, such as inviting peers to play at home, attending banquets and gatherings, etc., so that children have the opportunity to meet new friends.
5.Cultivate children's interests and hobbies: Parents can help their children develop interests and hobbies, let them participate in corresponding interest groups, communicate with like-minded people, and increase the chances of making friends.
It should be noted that parents should respect their children's personality and interests, and do not force their children to make friends. At the same time, parents should also educate their children on how to distinguish between good and bad friends and protect themselves.
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First, clarify the principle of making friends, there is an old saying in ancient China, "those who are close to Zhu are red, and those who are close to ink are black," so parents must teach their children to learn to recognize friends. For those friends who are sincere, kind and helpful, they are worth associating. And those who are dark, cunning, strange-tempered, or violent, tell their children to stay away.
In addition, parents should also tell their children to be sincere after making friends, to exchange sincerity for sincerity, and not to be duplicitous.
Second, parents who don't make friends for purpose should clearly tell their children not to make friends for profit. Some children saw that the other party's family was relatively wealthy, and often brought some delicious food, and they could satisfy their vanity, so they rushed to make friends with the regret cherry family. Parents should stop it in time after discovering it, this purposeful way of making friends will not only wronged themselves, but also gradually lose themselves.
Third, make more smart friends, the so-called intelligence is not only high IQ, but also good character. Really smart people, the vision is broad, the mind is fresh, more contact with this kind of people, will burst out of inspiration, and get along with the old age of smart people, will also attract more excellent people, so as to enhance the child's social circle.
Therefore, parents should encourage their children to make good friends, and they will become excellent when they get along with excellent people.
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Everyone longs for their own friends, and so do children. When a child sees children playing, but doesn't know how to join, then we adults need to guide her and help them make friends with their favorite children. The following is how I have compiled for you how to guide children to make friends, I hope you like the article!
1. Teach children to learn to share
Children at this stage have a strong sense of self, as long as it is their own things, they are never allowed to be filial to others, let alone play with their friends. Therefore, you need to teach your child to learn to share and tell him that good things can be shared with friends to play with.
2. Think of yourself as a friend to your child
You are a child. Parents, but at the same time, you are also a friend of your child. In daily life, why not communicate with your children as friends, you can think of yourself as children, play with children, you can use the way between friends to simulate, so that children can be interested in making friends and friends, and master certain methods.
Collapse shed. 3. Invite neighborhood children to be guests
Invite neighbor children to come to the house, teach the child to receive his friends warmly, encourage him to take out his candy, toys, etc. to share with his friends, let him take the initiative to find friends to play, and let him develop a good habit of taking the initiative to greet his friends and help his peers.
4. Teach children to meet real "good friends".
When watching cartoons or picture books with your child, when you see a plot about a good friend or a bad friend, emphasize that "such a friend is really good" or "such a friend is really dangerous, stay away from him" to further let the child understand what a real "good friend" is.
5. You have to set an example for your children
It is said that parents are their children's first teachers, so you have to use your words and deeds to influence your children. You can often take your child to visit a neighbor's or friend's house so that your child can experience that it is a pleasure to interact with people.
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Correctly guiding children to make friends can be: create a good circle of friends for children, encourage children to get along with peers, communicate more, do not force children, and give them a sense of security.
1. Create a good circle of friends for your children.
Parents consciously let their children make good friends, such as the children of relatives, friends or colleagues, parents have contacts with each other to know each other's temperament, and they also know each other's children, and create a reassuring children's social circle for their children under the choice of parents.
2. Encourage children to get along with their peers.
When there is a conflict between the child and his peers, parents should not rush to deal with it, let the child vent his emotions first, and then encourage the child more, so that the child wants to hold a banquet and return to the law to solve the conflict.
3. Communicate more.
This is very important, although children's social interaction is not as complicated as that of adults, you must tell your child what you can and cannot do when you are friends with others, which will affect your child's values and outlook on life in the future.
4. Don't force your child.
Some children are lively at home and more introverted outside, especially when facing unfamiliar environments and people. In the face of children with this personality, do not force children to take the initiative to socialize, let alone force them to become the focus of the children, which will make them hate socializing even more.
5. Give a sense of security.
Insecure children are extremely fragile and insecure, making it more difficult for them to build trust with others and maintain a good and harmonious relationship. On the contrary, children who feel safe will feel the love of others even if they are rejected 100 times.
The above is how to guide children to make friends correctly.
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"Don't play with classmates with poor grades" is not unreasonable.
Wang Ying. Many parents will give their children such "advice": don't play with classmates with poor grades, otherwise your grades will decline, and play with good students more.
Not only will they intervene to prevent their children from socializing with classmates with poor grades, but they also hope that teachers will try to arrange for their children to be at the same table with classmates with good grades.
How to guide children to make friends is a topic that parents must face in the new era. Parents don't like their children to play with classmates with poor grades, indicating that parents have high expectations for their children's growth, and they hope that their children will make friends with classmates with good grades, so that they can absorb positive energy from them and promote their children's academic progress. But children with poor grades are not useless, and if children make friends with classmates with good grades, then children with poor grades will not make friends, and this idea of parents reflects their cognitive bias in guiding their children to make friends.
There are many famous expositions on how to make friends in ancient China. More than 2,000 years ago, in the Analects, Confucius put forward three criteria for making friends: "Those who benefit have three friends, and those who lose have three friends."
Friendship is straight, friendship is forgiving, friendship is more heard, and it is beneficial; Friends are friendly, friendly and soft, friends are good, and losses are also lost. This means that there are three kinds of friends who are good for others: integrity, honesty, tolerance, and knowledge. There are also three kinds of friends who are harmful to people:
Speak crooked ways, be good at flattery, and like to talk flattery. There is a similar record in the book "Mencius": Wan Zhang asked:
Dare to ask friends. Mencius said: "Don't coerce the long, don't coerce the noble, don't coerce brothers but friends."
Those who are friends are also friends and their virtues, and they cannot be coerced. ”
"Don't play with classmates with poor grades" is not unreasonable.
Both Confucius and Mencius believed that the most important thing in making friends is to value each other's virtues. Confucius believed that making friends who call for integrity can help you achieve benevolence. Honest friends are your reliance; It is beneficial to make friends with well-informed friends who can discuss knowledge with you and help you acquire knowledge and wisdom. Mencius made it more clear that when making friends, we should pay attention to the character of the other party, and we should also pay attention to our own mentality of making friends, and do not rely on old age, high status, or the power of brothers to make friends.
According to such dating standards, we can see that "don't play with classmates with poor grades" is not unreasonable. Among the three criteria of "good friends" proposed by Confucius, students with poor grades can be classified as those who are not high in school and are lonely and uneducated. Making friends with such a child does not do much benefit from the perspective of academic improvement.
However, Confucius and Mencius also told us that the most important thing to make friends is to look at the character of the other party, and Confucius also put the virtues of "friendship and forgiveness" in the first and second places, and put "friends and more information" in the third place, which shows that making friends with noble character should be the first criterion for choosing friends.
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First of all, we must understand a truth, children's right to make friends is inalienable, and every child has the freedom and right to choose their own friends. Parents cannot limit their children's range of friends based on their own preferences and standards, nor can they judge a person's good or bad based on grades or other external conditions. Doing so will not only hurt the child's self-esteem and self-confidence, but also make the child disgusted and resistant to the parents, and even lead to the estrangement of the parent-child relationship.
Secondly, we need to know the fact that children's friendship does not necessarily affect their learning and behavior. Sometimes, children who do not study well or so-called bad children are not because they are not born smart or kind, but because they have different growth environments and experiences, and have their own interests and characteristics. They may also have strengths and brilliance that are worthy of learning and appreciation, such as bravery, strength, enthusiasm, creativity, etc.
If we can look at them with tolerance and understanding, we may find that they are not as terrible or pathetic as we imagined.
In the end, what we need to do is to let the child learn to make friends correctly. Making friends correctly does not mean that you can only play with children or good children who study well, but that you must be able to identify and distinguish the strengths and weaknesses of friends, be able to learn from each other's strengths and weaknesses, and help and influence each other. Making friends correctly does not mean blindly following or obeying friends, but having one's own judgment and opinions, and being able to refuse or resist some unreasonable or immoral demands or behaviors.
Making friends correctly also requires us to be sincere, tolerant and altruistic, to be able to respect, trust and care for our friends, and to be able to share happiness and pain.
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