How to set rules for children, how to set rules for children

How should I set rules for my child?

Find out why your child is resistant to the rules set by her parents, and whether the rules you have set for your children are reasonable and appropriate.

Ten house rules for children.

1. Prepare lessons before setting rules for adolescent children:

2. There are four ways to raise children: captivity, free-range, free-range and mixed. The most suitable for adolescent children is free-range, let go and do not let go, that is, to set rules and fences for children. The size of the fence depends on how your child is raised.

2. How to make rules:

1. Good parent-child relationship - direct establishment.

2. The parent-child relationship is generally - through a family meeting.

3. Poor parent-child relationship - temporarily do not stand, and the parent-child relationship is repaired and then established.

3. Implement rules: kind and firm.

Rules must be based on love, and rules without love will lead to children's resistance, so to sum up: there is a family, there is love, and there are boundaries. Love accounts for seven or eight points, and the rule is two or three points.

Fourth, the process of the family meeting:

1.Identify the chair and secretary for this week's family meeting.

2.Thanks. 3.Conference Theme.

4.Plan family activities.

5.Summary. 5. Precautions for holding family meetings:

1.Preferably once a week.

2.Don't neglect the acknowledgments.

3.The child does not open when he is emotional.

4.The meeting ended, an agreement was reached, and the family signed off to go to the wall.

5.Family meetings are not just about solving the child's problems, otherwise after a few times, the child may not want to have it.

6.Acknowledgments need attention.

1) Be specific: speak with facts.

2) Say how you feel.

3) Recently occurring.

4) Don't judge giving.

First of all, when setting rules for your child, the signal should be clear. It is necessary to clearly tell the child that the consequences of doing this are preferably related to the child's vital interests.

Second, don't label your child lightly. Don't make one thing bigger. If we adults say something like "you've been giving me trouble since I was born," we're going to lose confidence by associating ourselves with bad boys.

Since I was born like this, then I can only do this, so what else is there to change? "So don't make one thing bigger.

Third, set rules for your child, which must be simple and easy to understand, so that children can easily follow them. For example, when the child eats and grinds time, the mother should tell her when she gets up: finish eating in 30 minutes, otherwise she will be gone.

In the middle of the meal, you can remind her once and tell her how much time is left. You can also add some extra conditions, such as eating on time and giving some rewards. If you don't finish on time, cancel an offer.

Fourth, the rules that have been set up, no matter what time, place and occasion, must be followed, and all rules are not only set for children, but parents must also strictly abide by them and set an example.

Fifth, rules are not absolutely unbreakable, and at the child's request, occasionally "relaxing policies" – for example, replacing meals with snacks, watching a TV game at noon, sleeping half an hour late, etc. – will reduce stress and make children more consciously follow the rules.

Sixth, don't use the adult's code of conduct to regulate and restrain children, and don't blame some of children's naughty behaviors as "making mistakes".

Precautions. 1.These rules should be appropriate for children of all ages, and for each individual.

2.It is beneficial for both the child and us to gradually establish orderly rules.

Rules, or rules, seem to be a kind of constraint, but to a certain extent, they are a kind of protection for children.

1. Protect children's freedom.

Although rules may feel like a restriction on freedom, in fact, rules are better able to protect our freedom.

For example, because of the traffic rule of "stop at red light, go at green light", we have the freedom to pass safely; Because of the rules of queuing, we have the freedom of first come, first served; Because of the rule that you can't make loud noises in the library, we have the freedom to read quietly.

2. Ensure the health and safety of children.

Some rules are essential for children because they are related to their health and safety.

For example, we must brush our teeth every morning and evening to ensure the health of our teeth; For example, when sitting in the car, we must sit in a safety seat and wear a seat belt, so as to ensure our safety to the greatest extent; For example, children should not play with fire, so as to avoid burns, scalds and other accidents.

3. Let children have a sense of boundaries, so as to have a sense of security.

For children, the construction of a sense of security is based on the affirmation of parents and the perception of self-boundaries, rather than doting and pampering.

Rules can make children clearly understand what can be done and what cannot be done, children will have a familiar lifestyle in daily life, and can be expected to exert their autonomy in a safe and stable environment, which will make them feel secure and help to cultivate their independent personality.

4. It helps to cultivate children's good habits.

The formation of any habit is always very difficult at the beginning, in this process, children may appear all kinds of tricks, lazy situations, so in the early stage there needs to be a certain amount of compulsion, constantly repeat and consolidate this process, so that children have a sense of "must do", so that children will understand: rules are rules, will not change because of their own preferences or changes in the current mood. With first-hand experience of following the rules in the company of parents, children will be more self-disciplined when developing good habits in the future.

<><How to set rules for your child

1.Be simple and specific in setting rules for your child.

For example, "make the bed and put all the clothes in the closet", etc., instead of "tidy up the room" in general.

2.When talking to your child, don't use questions, just tell him what he should do.

Say "Please put the toys away right away" instead of "Can I put the toys away?" Otherwise, the child will literally interpret "toys can be accepted or not", and reject you with a "no".

3.Talk head-to-head.

Learn to meet your child face-to-face and make eye contact when talking, so that there will be a sense of agreement, and Song Tangerine will be more convincing when he speaks.

4.Punishment must be timely, regardless of the time, place and occasion

When the parents' preaching is not effective, they often start to scare the child, and if the child knows that the mother is just talking and will not implement it, it is not the same thing.

1.Clear rules: In order for children to be clear about the rules, the rules need to be clear, simple, and powerful, and each rule must be clearly expressed. The rules should also be in line with the child's age and ability level.

2.Establish a reward and punishment mechanism: The establishment of rules requires a certain reward and punishment mechanism, so that children know that compliance with rules is profitable, and violations of rules will inevitably be punished.

3.Practice the rules: The best way for children to learn the rules is to see their parents live by them. As parents, we must follow the rules and lead by example.

4.Communicate with children: Let them know why they have these rules, let them understand the principles behind the rules, and communicate effectively with children to understand their ideas and opinions.

5.Perseverance: Rules are not formed in a moment, and require long-term perseverance and patience. As children grow up, we must constantly remind and guide them, so that rules gradually become their code of conduct.

In conclusion, setting rules for children is an important job that requires patience and hard work from parents. By clarifying the rules, reward and punishment mechanism, practice, effective communication and perseverance, children can establish correct values and codes of conduct, and become moral and responsible people.

To set rules for children, you must teach them by word and deed in daily life, so that children will develop habits after a long time.

Establishing rules is not simply telling children what they can do and what they can't do, nor is it completely based on their own will to make rules, if you want to effectively establish rules, you should first do the following:

1. The rules should be divided into situations and reasonable.

Establishing rules for children should be in line with the actual situation such as the child's age and personality.

For example, when the child is only 1 year old, we ask him to clean up the toys by himself, but the child does not understand the concept of "tidying up" at this time, so it is obvious that he cannot complete it. But we can tell the child, "Help mommy put the toys in the box", which is something that the child can understand and do on his own, so we can ask the child to help us clean up the toys together.

Another example is that children are introverted and afraid of life, but we insist that children must greet outsiders every time, and children can't do it, and parents have to criticize children for not being polite, and this so-called "rule" is also unreasonable. In this case, what parents should do is to give their children more patient encouragement and guidance, rather than forceful coercion.

However, in some cases, the rules must be tough, such as when it comes to the safety and health of children: no running on the road, no car seats, brushing teeth every morning and evening...Another example is the issue of public rules: you can't throw objects in the air, you can't take strangers' things casually, and so on.

2. The rules should be clear and specific enough.

For rules to be enforceable, the rules must be clear and specific.

For example, parents usually like to say to their children, "Give me a good meal!" But the children's behavior does not improve, because they do not know how to "eat well". What we should tell our children is:

Now let's go wash our hands, then sit down in the dining chairs, put on our bibs, dig ourselves with spoons and eat, and we'll try this broccoli and this fish later

Only by giving your child specific instructions will they understand what we call "eating well".

1.Sooner rather than later.

The sooner you set the rules, the better, and when the child is three years old, he has almost begun to remember, so this is the time to start telling the child what he can and can't do.

2.Gentle and firm.

For some very naughty children, when communicating with children, you should have a gentle and firm attitude. Say one is one, say two is two, but don't put on a fierce attitude, because that may provoke the child's rebellious heart.

3.The power of example.

In fact, the best way to educate is to lead by example, children have always been with their parents before going to school, only parents make the right approach, imperceptibly, children will know, this approach is correct.