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I made an appointment with my girlfriend to take the baby to play in the water, and I drove to pick up their family. It was past the scheduled departure time, but they were nowhere to be seen. When I went upstairs to look, I realized that it was her five-year-old son who had not finished breakfast.
Say you're in the morning, and it's a grind to do anything. ''After my mother's voice fell, she obviously slowed down the speed of eating breakfast, and she was not in a hurry at all.
There is one at home''Rubbing ghosts''Parents may find that the word you say the most with your children may be''Hurry up''。And often the more you urge, the baby seems to be deliberately working against you, and the more you talk, the slower it becomes. The more anxious things are, the more he is like this, and many parents almost burst into a rage in the end.
What is the reason for the child's procrastination? What can we do to improve such habits? Let's analyze them one by one.
Why do children procrastinate?
I want to understand why some children keep rubbing in the bathroom before going to school, and why they always forget his kettle before going on an outing. First of all''Squat down''to understand this matter from the child's point of view.
Children are really slow to do things.
There are some things that children do very slowly from an adult's point of view. When the child gets up and grinds, when you shout to hurry up, what are you doing? He may be sweating profusely over the unbuttoned buttons on his shirt, and the urging of his parents only makes him more panicked.
He's not slow, he's just slower than you.
But we can't deprive the child of the right to do things on his own, urging the child and doing it for him at the same time, so that the child will never be able to get up quickly.
The child doesn't want to do it.
There was a mother who complained that her child was always struggling when she went to swimming lessons. One moment I forgot to bring a towel, and the next I said I wanted to drink water. But in fact, as long as the mother pays a little attention to the child's emotions, it is easy to find that the child does not want to do this at all.
At this time, patiently talking to your child about the reasons why he doesn't want to go is more effective than blindly urging him to hurry up.
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The first point is that the child may feel that the parents are very annoying in this behavior, so they drag it out, the second point is that the child is deliberate, because he is very rebellious to the behavior of the parents, and the third point is that the child has no concept of time, so it will be particularly procrastinated.
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It is because the child has a resistance mentality, so he feels that what the parents say is wrong, so he will procrastinate more and more.
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The problem lies in the education of parents, which shows that parents do not make their children aware of the importance of time, and then they have not regulated their children's behavior before, so they have procrastinated in doing things.
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Children are always procrastinating, what should parents do? Hello everyone, and welcome to today's parent-child class. The problem of child procrastination is a very common phenomenon, and many parents are also eager to help their children solve such trembling wrong behaviors, because procrastination has a lot of negative effects on children, whether it is for life, study and work.
Sometimes it can affect the people around you. So how can parents help their children correct their abusive habits? Today, I will teach you three tricks.
1. Be realistic and set goals. A person who has no goal is like a lonely boat adrift in the sea, unable to find the direction to shore. Therefore, in the process of educating children, parents must help their children set a clear and realistic goal, so that children can achieve it through hard work, so that they will not give up halfway because of too much difficulty.
After completing one goal, set the next one, increase the difficulty appropriately, and guide the child step by step to overcome the bad problem of procrastination.
2. Reward and punishment mechanism. Many children's time management is three days of fishing and two days of drying nets, and they give up just after a little effect, so that they can never change the problem of rubbing. Parents can develop a set of rewards, even if the child achieves a certain stage of the goal, they will reward him appropriately, if it is not completed, let them suffer the consequences caused by their own friction, for example, you originally planned to take the child to the children's playground to play on Sunday, but because he did not finish his homework on Saturday, at this time, parents must be ruthless, let them bear because they have not finished their homework and can not go out to play.
3. Teach children to recognize the value of time. The problem of child procrastination is a very common phenomenon, and many parents are eager to help their children solve such wrong behaviors, because procrastination has a lot of negative effects on children's life, study and work. Sometimes it can affect the people around you.
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What should parents do in the face of their children's procrastination?
1. Make a schedule with your child.
If children love to procrastinate, it may be because they have no concept of time, parents can work with the baby to make a suitable time schedule, such as getting up at 6:30 in the morning, dressing, washing, and preparing supplies for 20 minutes;
How many words to write in 30 minutes, etc., let the baby follow the schedule, and parents can encourage them more in this process and mobilize the baby's enthusiasm.
2. Play competition games with children.
If there are two children at home, let the two babies compete with each other, such as dressing, washing and other small things, if there is only one baby, father or mother can compete with the child, pay attention to the adults in this process to a certain extent let the baby, so that they have a certain sense of achievement, so that a pleasant family atmosphere helps them speed up their own things.
3. Parents lead by example.
If you want your child to develop a good habit of not procrastinating, parents should set an example, and finally set an example to arrange their time reasonably, such as not being late for work, and things can be completed on time.
4. Let the child bear the consequences of procrastination.
If the child procrastinates no matter what he does, and the parents have urged him many times and has not changed his friends after preaching, then the parents may wish to let him come according to his own time rhythm, such as washing, eating and procrastinating, resulting in being late for school, then he will be criticized by the teacher after going to school, so that he understands that his procrastination will bring consequences.
5. Set incentives and punishments.
If teaching and urging are useless, then parents may wish to take reward and punishment measures, such as rewarding a small heart after the child completes a certain thing on time, and when the accumulation reaches ten, you can get a reward, etc.; If you delay once, such as being late for school, you will be punished with a reduction in pocket money or a week's worth of snacks.
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Parents are anxious, suspicious, small-hearted, distressed children, parents are reluctant to let their children suffer, reluctant to use children, everything is done for children, after a long time, children will become dependent on their parents, for example: even if I don't get up, there are mothers who tell me to get up, over time, just wait for my mother to call, when my mother doesn't call, I won't be able to get up. Another example:
As soon as the child comes back from school and wants to take a break, the mother is anxious and immediately urges the child to do homework. If parents do everything in front of their children, do they still need to think about it? Do you still need to do it?
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Procrastination in children is a common problem, and here are some suggestions that may help:
1.Make a plan: Have your child make a list of tasks to complete each day and post them in a prominent place. You can work with your child to help him set achievable goals and appropriate rewards to motivate him to complete the task.
2.Establish rules: Make some house rules and regulations, such as stipulating that you can only play after completing your homework, setting a certain time limit for completing tasks, and so on. When a child violates the rules, there are appropriate punitive measures to ensure that the rules are enforced.
3.Give encouragement: Give positive feedback and encouragement when your child completes tasks or makes progress, so that your child feels that his or her efforts are recognized and appreciated. This can help build a child's self-esteem and self-confidence.
4.Communicate with children: Understand children's interests, hobbies and needs, communicate and communicate with children, and help them find their own learning styles and methods to improve their learning efficiency and interests.
5.The power of example: As a parent of Volta, you should set a good example and show your diligence and hard work. This can motivate children to learn to imitate, learn to follow the good habits and behaviors of their parents, and thus develop their own good habits.
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If your child is aware of the procrastination habits, there are a few things you can do to guide them:
Set clear goals and timelines: Help your child clarify the importance of tasks and deadlines for completion. Work with them to develop a specific plan to break down tasks into small, manageable pieces and set deadlines for each task.
Establish a reward and punishment system: Set up a reward and punishment system so that children understand the positive consequences of completing tasks and the consequences of not completing tasks. The reward can be a small reward or a special activity, and the punishment should be a reasonable punishment to make the child realize the importance of time.
Provide clear guidance and support: Make sure your child understands the requirements of the task clearly and gives them the necessary guidance and support. Encourage them to ask questions, address concerns, and provide necessary resources or tools.
Develop good time management habits: Teach your child how to plan their time reasonably and establish good time management habits. They can be taught to use tools such as schedules, reminders, etc., so that they can learn to learn and allocate their work time.
Stimulate interest and motivation: Finding your child's areas of interest and associating tasks with their interests can increase their initiative and engagement. Give affirmation and encouragement so that they can feel a sense of accomplishment when they complete their tasks.
Lead by example: As a parent, set an example for your children. By demonstrating self-proactive and efficient completion of tasks, children will learn good habits from imitation.
Most importantly, patience and understanding are key to guiding your child through procrastination. Have an open dialogue with your child, understand their confusion and challenges, and provide support and encouragement to help them develop a proactive attitude.
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In response to your child's procrastination, here are some suggestions that may help:
Set a clear schedule and task list: Parents can work with their children to create a clear schedule and task list so that the child knows exactly what tasks need to be completed and the time requirements. This helps children to be more organized and develop good time management habits.
Encourage your child to try new things: Parents can encourage their children to try new things, for example, by letting them learn a new language, learn a new instrument, or try some new sports, which can help stimulate children's interest and motivation to learn.
Give your child appropriate encouragement and support: Parents can give their child appropriate encouragement and support, such as praising their progress and giving them some free time to explore what they are interested in, which can help increase their motivation to learn.
Cultivate children's self-discipline: Parents can cultivate children's self-discipline through some methods, such as setting some rules and limits to let children know when they can do things and when they can't do things; Or through some incentives, let the child know what kind of reward he will get after completing the task, etc.
Help your child build a sense of task: Parents can help their child build a sense of task, for example, before they start doing something, parents can tell them the importance and goal of the task, so that the child knows more clearly about the task he needs to complete. This will help to make your child more motivated to complete the task.
Guide children to learn to focus: Parents can guide children to learn to focus through some methods, for example, before children start to do something, parents can tell them the importance and goals of the matter, so that children can know more clearly what they need to complete; Or use some methods to help your child concentrate, for example, let your child listen**, do meditation, or do some simple physical activities.
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The problem of children's procrastination must be related to the environment, and the behavior of parents is a mirror of children. Many of the children's behaviors are based on the gourd drawing scoops with the parents of the potato sedan chair. When parents often procrastinate, the PPT to be done must be delayed until the last day before acting, and it is always late to go out when I make an appointment with friends to watch a movie, and I always have to eat for a long ......time while swiping my mobile phone while eatingThen, the child will also become procrastinating, and when parents criticize the child for procrastinating, the child will not be convinced in his heart, and he will not listen to it at all.
Method. 2. Encourage children and recognize their children's progressParents should have a pair of eyes that are good at discovering beauty, observe the progress of children's behavior, and give children encouragement and praise in a timely manner. For example, when you find that your child writes more attentively these days, you can praise your child like this
There are two words in your line that are better written than before! "Your handwriting today is neater than yesterday's. "When you notice that your child has been working on his homework and looking at his watch lately, trying to speed up the horsepower, you can encourage your child in this way:
You've made progress by 20 minutes ahead of yesterday in completing your homework today. "Now I don't need to remind you, you can finish your homework by 9 o'clock." "Encouragement, not only when your child is doing well, but also when your child is not doing so well, or even when he is doing badly, your child will definitely give back to you with more positive efforts.
Method. 3. Improve children's concentration, do one thing Many times, the reason why children have no concept of time is because they are not attentive enough to do things, half-heartedly, not only thinking about playing when doing homework, thinking about drinking water, thinking about going to the toilet, but also not having fun when playing, sitting down for a while and standing up again, moving around is not restless at all. Smart parents, first, try not to disturb the child when the child is doing things, so that the child can concentrate on doing things well; The second is to slowly guide the child and gradually extend the time for the child to focus on one thing, such as reading a book at one time from 10 minutes at the beginning to 15 minutes or 20 minutes. Method.
Fourth, get along with children on an equal footing, supervise each other, and what children desire most is to be friends with their parents, and both parties can communicate on an equal footing. If parents not only criticize their children's procrastination, but also review their own abrasive behavior, and compare their hearts with their hearts, children will be more receptive to parents' opinions and more willing to correct their own behavior. Parents can sign a small contract with their children, both parties supervise each other, and when one of them procrastinates, the other party can directly point it out and accept the punishment; When a party does not procrastinate for a month, they can be praised and rewarded accordingly.
Only in this way can the child procrastinate and grind!!
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