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The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has always been the most difficult interpersonal relationship.
Being yourself and complaining less is effective in maintaining a balance of mindset.
When the interpersonal environment cannot be changed for a while, it is wise to change your mindset first.
The mentality is broken, and the environment is even worse.
Only with a good mindset can we hope to improve the environment.
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Alas, I feel that you men do not understand your words, and being together is torture. He listens to everything and doesn't have his own opinions. I think you'd better break up!
It's not good to live in someone who is not married. Now that wolves have more meat and less meat, why worry about not finding a good man, love is considered a god horse in front of bread?
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After reading your description, I felt your entanglement. It's normal for couples to live together, but it does take some courage and some skills to get along with each other's mothers. In fact, in my opinion, you can't call cohabitation in this situation, but you went to the man's house as an intern daughter-in-law.
I don't know where you and your boyfriend are in a relationship right now? Are you talking about getting married?
Falling in love and getting married are two different things. Love is a type of person, you list your love standards, you see if there are many people who meet your requirements, not your current boyfriend alone! But marriage is a person, and one person ends.
So is your relationship stable, and is it to the point where you live with each other's parents? In the case you described, it is clear that you don't think so yourself.
Your boyfriend asked for cohabitation, and you agreed on the spur of the moment, but after careful consideration, you felt that it was inappropriate, and you wanted to refuse and were afraid that your boyfriend would misunderstand you and cheat on her. Why do you have such thoughts? It seems that you take this relationship more seriously.
You're afraid of losing the relationship, and you think that if you promise and go back on your word, your boyfriend will look down on you. Have you been in the role of a gleaser in this relationship? Love is the result of two-way interaction, and all relationships are the result of interaction.
In a relationship, who is willing to give all the time without asking for anything in return? In fact, the kind of giver who keeps saying that he doesn't ask for anything in return is the real taker. After a long time, it will inevitably cause imbalance in the heart, and the relationship will not last long.
In fact, you are not exclusive to cohabitation, but to live under the same roof with the other parent. It's as simple as telling your boyfriend that you can live together, but it's just the two of you. Tell him about your concerns, and he should also respect your inner feelings.
In this way, you will not only fulfill your promise to live with him, but also make yourself comfortable and follow your heart, and the days of living together will be much more comfortable in the future. People's hearts are insatiable, I suggest that you are psychologically prepared and then contact your boyfriend's family is not too late, if two people live alone can also be considered, in this case, the girl should think carefully and ask for the opinion of her parents.
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You should be friendly with your mother and take the opportunity to have a good relationship, because in this way you can get the approval of your future mother-in-law in advance.
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I think you should communicate well with your boyfriend and tell your boyfriend that now the two of you are just in a relationship, not married, and his mom doesn't have the right to move in, just let his mom move out.
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Then you move out to live, after all, it's very uncomfortable for three people to live together, not to mention that you are not a husband and wife and it is also embarrassing, so you simply move out by yourself, and it looks more decent and self-respecting.
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What to do with my mother's boyfriend living in my house" is a question that many children do not want to face but have to face. After all, the sudden entry of a stranger into your life can bring all sorts of problems and distress. However, we can deal with this situation by going through the following points.
First of all, it is very important to have a good communication and relationship with your mom's boyfriend. Communicating openly and honestly with him and trying to build a relationship of mutual trust is the first step in getting along. At the same time, we should also respect his habits and lifestyle, and try to match his work and living habits as much as possible to avoid friction and contradictions.
Establishing a good way to get along is the key to solving problems.
Secondly, it is also important to express your feelings and needs appropriately. If you feel uncomfortable or troubled by the arrival of your mom's boyfriend, look for an opportunity to talk to your mom or other close friends. After all, we all need a channel to talk to us to soothe negative emotions.
But we should also try to avoid complaining or attacking each other excessively, and create a harmonious family atmosphere, which is conducive to maintaining our mental health.
Finally, we can also adapt to new family members through our own efforts. This includes learning how to live independently and take responsibility, as well as learning to deal with your own emotions and emotional issues. Growing up brings us to different challenges and difficulties, but it is only through adaptation and adjustment that we become more mature and stable.
In short, my mother's boyfriend living in my house is a reality that we need to face. However, by establishing a good pattern of getting along, expressing our feelings and emotions appropriately, and by working hard to adapt and grow, we can all get through this turning point in the family.
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Summary. Your boyfriend's position is important!
Ignore you and your boyfriend's mother, it's especially difficult to do between your boyfriend alone
I think you should deal with your boyfriend's problem first, if you have a problem, it's his problem, and if his mother has an opinion, it's also his problem!
For Tai, the most important thing is that the two of you can get along, at least he will worry more about this than both of you, you should do his job, make him understand, and also do your boyfriend's mother's job
The reason that mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can't stay together forever What is this truth What is this? Says who?
It's very unreasonable, in fact, you have to solve the restrictions of both sides, I think you and your boyfriend's mother should have to take a step back, if you understand the reason, I want your boyfriend to do psychological work with his mother, so that his mother understands, this will be better, and you yourself have to do a good job, at least getting along is a matter of two people, but here is a matter of three people!
I hope you can handle it well, and I wish you a happy marriage!
Ask for help Don't want to live with your boyfriend's mom.
The position of your boyfriend's manuscript is very important! Ignore you and your boyfriend's mother, it's very difficult for your boyfriend to do it alone I think you should deal with your boyfriend's problem first, if you have a problem, it's his problem, and his mother's problem is also his problem! For Tai, the most important thing is that the two of you can get along well, at least he will worry about this problem more than both of you, you should do his job, let him understand, and also do your boyfriend's mother's work Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law can't stay together forever What is this What is this?
Says who? It's very unreasonable.,Jiansui actually you have to solve the restrictions of both sides.,I think you and your boyfriend's mother should have to take a step back.,If you understand the reason.,I want your boyfriend to do psychological work with his mother.,Let his mother understand.,It's better.,And you have to do a good job yourself.,At least getting along is a matter of two people.,But here is a matter of three people! I hope you can handle it well, and I wish you a happy marriage!
My boyfriend is from the countryside, his father is sullen and his mother has a bad relationship, and his mother must be with her son. We're not in the same city, and he's going to come to my city to buy a house and get married, provided that he lives with his mother after the wedding.
Her mother is very good and has a good temper, but I think it's better not to be filial piety, it's like a family with two hostesses, and there are many things in the family, and there are elders in the family, and I still have to hold on to it, but I can't solve it.
Ask about custom messages].
You have to go with him, or he won't agree.
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Your boyfriend wants you to please his mom and have a good relationship with your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and to come home to spend time with her when her mom is home alone, which is considered normal or not, depending on the individual's values and cultural background. Below I will analyze and discuss from different perspectives.
First, in some cultures, respecting and caring for parents is a traditional value. Especially in Asian cultures, respect and care for elders are seen as an important part of family harmony. In this case, the boyfriend going home to accompany the mother may be seen as a kind of filial piety and responsibility, which is seen as a normal behavior in the cherry blossom to a certain extent.
However, the definition of normal or not also varies from person to person. In modern society, the independence and autonomy of individuals are also valued, and there should be an attitude of equality and mutual respect between boyfriends and girlfriends. Therefore, a boyfriend who is overly focused on his mom and favors her too much in his decisions and actions can raise questions about balance and personal rights.
This may require finding balance and understanding through open communication and consultation.
When solving this problem, you and your boyfriend can try the following:
1.Communication and understanding: Communicate your feelings and thoughts openly with your boyfriend and listen to his explanations. Find a win-win solution through understanding and respect on both sides.
2.Define personal boundaries: In family relationships, everyone has their own boundaries and needs. You can communicate with your boyfriend and define personal boundaries between you, ensuring that everyone gets the independence and autonomy they need.
3.Co-consultation: Find a balanced and workable solution that can schedule time and attention according to the needs of the individual and family to ensure that the relationship is fair and sustainable.
Most importantly, building and maintaining healthy relationships requires mutual understanding, respect, and balance. Whether it is a boyfriend or a boyfriend or a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it should be based on the principles of equality and mutual respect. With proper communication and consultation, solutions can be found that work for all and harmonious family relationships can be established.
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Communicate clearly with your boyfriend, say that you don't like this, don't listen, and reconsider your relationship.
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Your boyfriend's mom often comes to live with you, so you can solve it this way. First of all, you should have a good relationship with your aunt, and secondly, you should warmly welcome each other.
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In our lives, love, marriage, and family are all important themes that we can't avoid. Among them, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is undoubtedly a very challenging topic, and getting a girlfriend to please her mother is even more tricky. So, when our boyfriend asks us to please his mother, or even asks us to live with her, is it normal or not?
First of all, we need to be clear that every family, every mother and child, has their own way of getting along. Some men may choose to maintain a close relationship with their mother, respecting and caring for her, which is not abnormal in itself. However, if this intimacy begins to affect our lives and even requires us to cater to his mother, then problems may arise.
From the point of view of Kodai psychology, if a person is overly dependent on his mother and cannot deal with his emotional and life problems independently, then his behavior may show a certain amount of childishness and immaturity. They may see their mother as the center of their lives and ignore their partner's presence, or even ask their partner to cater to their mother. Such behaviour can be stressful for the partner and affect the relationship between the partners.
However, this does not mean that all men will be like this. Some men may be able to balance their mothers and partners, respecting and understanding their feelings. They will look for ways to approach the relationship in a way that shows respect and concern for their mother without neglecting their partner.
This type of man usually has a mature ability to handle emotions and relationships, and it is worth looking for.
Therefore, when our boyfriend asks us to please his mother or even ask us to live with her, we need to think hard and understand the meaning behind this behavior. If this behavior shows that he is immature or dependent, then we need to seriously consider whether the relationship is worth maintaining. And if our boyfriend can balance the relationship and respect and understand our feelings, then the behavior itself may not have much of an impact on the relationship.
Maybe your boyfriend will be really busy, in order to prevent distraction, the permission to temporarily cancel you, the man's emotional ups and downs are the most unstable when he is busy, and the landlord really shouldn't have a temper tantrum with him, alas....But since it's already in trouble, take the initiative to contact him, probe his tone, and then talk to him as appropriate to admit his mistakes, if you usually have a good relationship, there shouldn't be a big problem, after all, it's not a serious big contradiction, I think your boyfriend will forgive you, unless there is a potential conflict at ordinary times, then this time it may be a fuse, good luck
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It mainly depends on how your boyfriend treats her, if you have forgotten it, then you can rest assured, if you want to be good with her, then you have to fight for it, or break up.