What do you think about your parents who always take matters into their own hands?

I don't think that's a good thing to do. Although parents may be just for the good of their children, everything is for their children. But it is clear that this approach is not good.

No one likes others to control their own lives, and children must also want their own lives to be their own decisions, in this case, I am afraid that the arrangement of parents will cause "disgust" among children. I think it's most important to communicate well with good things in the family, and it's good to talk about everything.

If you oppose it, who can control your life, in the final analysis, is not because you dare not make your own choice, and finally leave the decision to them, and start to be picky about their practices.

You can't like to eat fish and dislike it for having too many spines, your parents like to do it, and whether you want to accept it or not, are completely two different things, don't put yourself in the position of a victim.

Parents are not worried that their children will have a bad life, and if they don't like it, they will refuse, it's as simple as that.

Parents are always good at arrogating everything that is not conducive to the growth of their children, without taking into account the feelings of their children, it is possible that what children need is not what their parents think, which will cause children to rebel, so as parents should communicate more with their children and know what their children want, rather than arguing about everything.

Parents may have been worried about us since we were young, and even if we grow up, we are all children in their eyes, and it is understandable that they always want to help us arrange things in the most appropriate way and let us have less back roads.

But when we grow up and have our own ideas, we should also take responsibility for solving things, so we can discuss this matter with our parents and let them let it go appropriately.

Parents must be thinking too much about you when they do this, they want to do something for you, they are afraid that you will not do it well, they treat you as a child, they forget that you have grown up. If you really don't like it, say it out loud and let them know it's wrong, and you can do what you want.

It is actually very painful for children, because when children grow up, they will definitely have their own ideas. I think that as a parent, we should still think more about the child's first-mover, and try to let the child make his own decisions about the child's affairs, so that the family can live in harmony.

If my parents have the ability to help me do everything, then I am still happy and idle, so that I don't have to think about anything, I don't have to think about anything, just enjoy life, but my parents can't do it, only I can work hard to do everything for my children in the future.

Parents who take care of everything for their children, they will monitor everything about their children at all times, and when any problems arise with their children, they will rush to solve them immediately. Such children grow up usually:

dependent. Because the subconscious has been formed, as long as there is any problem, someone will solve it, so this arranged child, usually when he encounters anything, he will not find a way to solve it himself, but rely on others to solve it. This is an inertia, but there is no one around who can help her solve all her problems like his parents, so it is possible that this person will, retreat to the house, continue to enjoy everything that his parents provide him, such as now there are many, after people grow up and start a family, neither of them goes out to work, and continues to receive funding and arrangements from their parents at home.

The dangers of parents doing everything are as follows:

1. Special treatment can easily cause children to become selfish, have no sympathy, and will not care about others;

2. Excessive attention of parents can easily lead to children being restless all day long, and their attention is extremely distracted;

3. Parents' easy satisfaction with their children will inevitably develop the bad character of children who do not cherish things, pay attention to material enjoyment, waste money and are inconsiderate of others, and have no patience and hardship;

4. It is easy to cause children to live lazy, lack of self-motivation and curiosity, and to get by.

The dangers of parents arranging a vertical cut are as follows:

1. Special treatment can easily cause children to become selfish, have no sympathy, and will not care about others;

2. Excessive attention of parents can easily lead to children being restless all day long, and their attention is extremely distracted;

3. The easy satisfaction of parents for their children will inevitably develop the bad character of children who do not cherish things, pay attention to material enjoyment, waste money and are inconsiderate of others, and have no patience and hardship;

4. It is easy to cause children to live lazy, lack of self-motivation and curiosity, be passable and stupid, and do things with a beginning and no end.

On weekends, the neighbor's children came to play with her son, and the two boys always played with him, and he walked back with his feet covered in mud and a dirty face. The mother did not lose her temper, but when she was changing new shoes and socks for the child, she only put on one shoe and one sock for him and left the ......

You really can't be too diligent when you are a mother!

Why would she do that? In fact, before this, every time my son played with his friends, he would make a mess all over his body, and whenever he saw the appearance of the child coming home, the mother's heart was broken. Fortunately, she restrained the thousands of troops in her heart, and she will clean up a new look every time.

But after a long time, I had to find a way to clean up the mess, so I came up with this idea. That is, the original family labor education law - no matter what you do, only half of it is done for the child, and the other half must be completed by the child independently. When her son's shoes were dirty, she polished one shoe in front of the child, told the child the essentials while doing it, and let the child clean the other shoe by himself, even if the child did not do it well, it also made him feel the hardships of his parents' labor.

She believes that this practice is similar to "it is better to teach a man to fish than to teach him to fish".

You do everything, which is the deepest harm to children

Today's parents almost all know the harm of doting on their children, but there are very few people who can really distinguish what doting is. Many parents pay too much attention to their children and want to do everything - because they see that their children are tired of studying, and their children's schoolbags are cleaned up by their mothers every time, and pencils are sharpened every time; The teacher explained the child's affairs, and the mother was all imprinted in her mind, and she reminded her once in a while!

What's even more ironic is that one day, I was chatting with a primary school homeroom teacher, and she told me that she criticized a few students who didn't bring all the utensils, and several children complained: "It's all my mother's fault for forgetting to bring it to me!" "It's my dad who carelessly took the wrong one."

It seems that I made a mistake, and it has nothing to do with myself. So, as a parent, what do you bring to your children when you do everything? It is nothing more than bringing laziness and incompetence to children, as well as sadness and disappointment to parents.

On the other hand, the mother mentioned above, she neither did everything for her children, nor did she tie her hands, but only helped her children half of everything, helping and educating at the same time, but achieved good educational results. It is worth learning and thinking about.

You learn to be "lazy", and the child is diligent

Mothers should learn to be "lazy" appropriately, and if the child is able to do it, please try to let him do it himself, even if he does not do it well, he should also give praise, which can enhance the child's self-confidence. When implementing, parents must let go of the misconception that "the child is still young, and it will be too late to teach it in the future", and parents can formulate what things to do by the child themselves according to the characteristics of the child. With this arrangement, children are accustomed to doing their own things, and when the time comes, they will naturally do it without the urging of their parents, and they will have the ability to execute.

You are already an adult and have the right to accept and reject what anyone else asks you to do. So in the face of parents like you, be sure to communicate with them comprehensively about this matter. Tell them you don't like that. This should be done concretely.

First, find a time to sit down and talk to your parents about what they think about them always asking you to do things you don't like. If your parents don't think that they make you do something you don't like, it means that they don't pay attention to your feelings at all.

Second, try to do your part well, so that your parents believe that you can make your own decisions and plan your own life, and you don't need your parents to tell you what to do.

Third, separate yourself from your parents. Because you are an adult who has entered society, you don't need to implement everything according to your parents' wishes and decisions, you have your own thoughts and ideas, and if you are not fundamentally separated, then many of your major decisions in the future will be influenced by them.

In fact, I have a deep feeling for this matter, because my mother is a person who loves to worry about my affairs, and even she likes to "arrange", but I am indeed a person who does not like to let others do a lot of things for me, so in order to avoid such things, I silently did a lot of resistance, such as often doing things first and then playing, and only informing them of the final result. It turns out that I have done a lot of things by myself, and I don't necessarily need the advice and participation of my parents, and there are many cases like this, I believe that they will let go of your heart, and they will not ask you to do this and that often. The premise is that you must correct your idea of relying on your parents, and it is not so difficult to listen to them, try to express your thoughts, and your parents will understand you and choose to let go.

I don't agree with this matter, because when we are together, we have something to share together, and always advocating that we do everything by ourselves will bring a lot of pressure to ourselves.

My parents are such people, they do everything, they come to organize, they need anyone to help, although they are appreciated by everyone, they have been recognized by everyone, but they have caused a lot of pressure on themselves, whether it is economic, or mental, it has caused a certain impact, I think it is very unworthwhile, I can't get anything, but it is very hard, why can't we let everyone share some together. I think it's because they want to stand out too much that they do this. It's not worth it, you can divide it appropriately with everyone, and everyone can work together to achieve the same effect.

I think that our own life should be decided by ourselves, although our parents can save us a lot of time and energy and avoid detours, but we may lose a lot of opportunities to exercise and develop dependence on others.

For myself, I will not let my parents interfere too much in my life, because I have already made a plan for my future life, and I hope that my future life will go on according to my plan, step by step, that is the life I want, even if I suffer a lot for this, no matter how many sins I suffer.

I think this is a problem that I can't bear to be my parents, and I love them very much, but I have my own choices in life, and I don't like to do things, which I absolutely can't bear.

My mother and one of my aunts had a very good relationship, and the two of them were pregnant together, so I ordered a baby kiss for my aunt's son, and when I grew up and learned about it, I still felt very ridiculous, and felt that my parents took my marriage as a child's play, but fortunately, I and the other two people didn't look down on each other, so this baby kiss was stopped.

My parents always insist on doing some things, which makes me very distressed, because it makes me feel very unfree, after all, I want to make my own decisions, I do what I want to do, and have my own life.

My parents like to make decisions for me, and if I want to be a good child in front of outsiders, how to deal with people, how to deal with people, and even my college entrance examination aspirations make decisions for me, and they don't respect my ideas at all, which brings me a lot of pressure.

I feel that I don't like my parents who always take care of everything for me, because I also have my own ideas, and I want to do something that I like.

My parents often arranged some things for me without asking me if I liked these things or not, as long as they thought it was feasible, they would do it, and they would not ask my opinion, so that I was like a robot, completely without my own thinking and space.

When I was in high school, my parents were good at advocating and doing everything, when I finished the college entrance examination, I wanted to apply for a school in Chongqing, but my parents took the initiative to apply for a school in Dalian.

At that time, I felt very angry, because I felt that this matter could be solved by myself, and they should not interfere in my future, and they enrolled me in a school in Chongqing, which made me feel very angry.