It s the good people who send you the funniest jokes in the door!

One day they met God while they were shopping! They said to God that they had all died miserably, and they wanted to let them go to heaven! God reluctantly said that there were now too many occupants of heaven and it was full.

But now there is still a spot! Say, whoever dies the worst will go to heaven!

So, the first ghost began to say ......I was a cleaner when I was alive. It's hard work! From morning to night!

One day, I was cleaning glass outside a building! It's the kind of high-altitude dangerous work that hangs outside! On the 30th floor!

Suddenly, my foot slipped and I fell! I thought, it's over! I'm going to die!

But survival instincts keep me scratching unconsciously! Luckily, I grabbed the railing of a balcony, on the 13th floor. I thought, saved!

So I wanted to climb up after I had recovered my strength! Suddenly, someone grabbed my hand, and I fell down again! I thought, I'm really done now!

However, my life should not be decided, there is a tent under me to catch me, I am glad that I must have accumulated virtue in my previous life! I want to wait for the strength to go down. Unbeknownst to me, a refrigerator fell from above and smashed me to death!

The second ghost said ......I was a clerk when I was alive. Everything is fine, I have a wife and it's beautiful. Great figure!

But it's a bit watery. I have a slight heart condition. One day I forgot to bring my medicine to work, so I went home to get it.

As soon as I entered the door, I saw my wife's hair disheveled and her clothes disheveled. There must be adulterers. So I searched all over the house, in the kitchen, in the toilet, but I couldn't find it.

When I got to the balcony, I found two hands on the railing, and I thought: Adulterer! So he took his hand.

I thought, 13th floor! Look at the fall that doesn't kill you! As a result, when I looked, I didn't die!

Caught in the tent! I was in a hurry, so I searched all over the house, went into the kitchen, and found that the refrigerator was big enough, so I threw it down. Finally stoned him to death!

I was so happy! Laughing out loud. Who knew that the heart muscle was so choked with laughter that he died laughing!

The third ghost said ......I was a thug when I was alive, but I didn't do anything bad! One day I went to a female friend's house and hung out! Just finished running errands, her husband suddenly returned!

I've got to find a place to hide. So I searched for the kitchen and the toilet, and finally found that their refrigerator was quite big, so I hid in the refrigerator! I don't understand how her husband knew I was in the refrigerator, and he actually threw the refrigerator down from the 13th floor!

I just fell to death with a refrigerator!

On the road to Chicago Airport, a taxi was driving with a Japanese tourist in board. At this moment, a taxi overtook and the Japanese shouted:"And voila, Toyota!

Made in Japan! How fast! "After a while, another taxi overtook me.

Look, Nissan! It is made in Japan! It's too fast!

Another taxi overtook it. "Hi! It's Mitsubishi!

Made in Japan! Hurry! "The taxi driver is 100 percent American, and I can't help but be a little annoyed to see so many Japanese cars surpassing my own American cars, coupled with the Japanese man's arrogant language.

The taxi pulled into the airport parking lot and another taxi overtook it. "It's Honda! Made in Japan!

Hurry! It's no cure! "The taxi driver stopped, pointed to the meter angrily, and said

1500 USD. ""It's $1,500 so close?! " "Taximeter!

Made in Japan! Hurry! It's no cure!

1.Xiao Li was going to attend a dinner with friends, and when he went out, he stuffed his pockets with rotten paper, cigarette cases, envelopes and other things. Seeing this, my wife asked in surprise

What's the use of those things you put in them? Xiao Li smiled mysteriously and said, "It's very useful!"

The wife said with a look of disdain: "What's the use of those rags, don't be ashamed!" Xiao Li said proudly

You don't understand this, do you? Whenever I finished eating with my friends and paying the bill, I would go to the front and shout, 'I'll settle it!'

Then he pulled out the rotten paper and cigarette case from his pocket, and before he could take out all the things in his pocket, someone else had already settled the account. ” 2.Xiaolan has always been very timid.

One day, she went out on a date with her new boyfriend, and when it was almost dark, the two walked to a park gate. Her boyfriend proposes to go for a walk in the park, but Ran seems hesitant. Seeing this, the boyfriend asked

What exactly are you afraid of? If you are afraid of others, there is me; If you're afraid of me, there's someone else. ” 3.

Xiaofei cut her jet-black hair, and her colleague Brother Zhao asked, "I heard that girls have to go through a fierce ideological struggle to cut their hair short. Xiaofei, how many days have you struggled?

Xiaofei looked in the mirror and said, "I didn't fight." Brother Zhao asked in surprise

So resolute? Xiaofei smiled: "Well, I came out with my boyfriend after getting the marriage certificate, and he said to me."

Baby, let's cut our long hair. Because, from today on, you will not spend your boyfriend's money on straightening, perming, and dyeing your hair, but your family's money. So I agreed.

4.Tom has always believed that "3" is his lucky number, because he was born on March 3, has three children, and lives at 33 Third Avenue in San Francisco. It was Tom's 33rd birthday, and he happily went to the horse race, and deliberately selected the No. 3 horse in the third race, and made a bet of 33,333 yuan.

At the end of the race, the horse really won the third place, but unfortunately the horse racing competition only won the first place, and Tom's 33,333 yuan was all lost! 5.After Jack finished playing at the golf club, he left in a hurry.

On the way, the police stopped him and asked, "Was it you who kicked off on the 16th hole 20 minutes ago?" Jack nodded in surprise.

The policeman continued: "You hit a left-sided curveball, and the ball flew over the bushes and off the court, right?" Jack was even more surprised:

yes, that's right! How do you know? The policeman said solemnly

The ball you hit flew off the highway and smashed through the windshield of a driver. The car lost control and crashed into a fire truck. Fire trucks failed to reach the fire, and the burning building was burned to the ground.

Say, what are you going to do? Jack thought for a moment and replied, "I think my stance should be tighter, my grip tighter, and my right thumb lower." ”