Why is marriage a besieged city, and how to get out?

Mr. Qian Zhongshu's words resonated with many people, the people in the besieged city want to go out and besiege the city, and the people outside desperately want to go in, as a married person, I think marriage is not a besieged city. The reason why people who feel that marriage is a besieged city is that they have psychologically bound themselves, and everyone is free, whether you are single or married, you should be free. If the heart does not move, the wind is helpless, and it has its own independent personality, its own economic strength, and its own life pursuits and hobbies.

I should be full of self-confidence, have pursuits and goals in life, and the more independent I am, the easier it is to go out I appreciate what a teacher told me, he said that as a person, don't label yourself casually, what menopause? What adolescence, what agitation? Wait a minute.

These labels are all put on yourself, and once you decide to put them on, you will build a siege for yourself. Marriage is not a siege, marriage is just a hand-in-hand for the two of us to be happy, a family formed, a warm harbor, how can it be a siege? We must be full of self-confidence, we must have the pursuit of life, rely on our own hard work to achieve our life goals, the more independent we are, the more we will forget this siege, and we will not easily label ourselves, marriage is for us to come and go freely.

Marriage is your own, everyone should live freely, if you love, you will be together, if you don't love, you will be separated, Liang Jingru sang a song called courage, every girl should have courage, why don't you talk about men here, boys are very active in their bones, he has courage, he did not hesitate, he did what he wanted, he did not do it, girls can't, personality determines that they are hesitant and stagnant. The more confident a girl is, the more full of sunshine, she will be free to do anything, marriage is my own, it is what I want, the two of us will love well together, and the two of us will be separated if we don't love, but we are still relatives and parents of children.

The siege of the city, for us, is the label we put on ourselves, why should we put this label? It's because you've surrendered in your heart, you've bowed your head, and you want to think like this, but in fact, every act and action in reality is completely based on your point of view, your attitude towards life. I don't think of marriage as a besieged city, so I never tie myself up in it, in marriage I want to gain joy and happiness, so let those pain and sorrow away from me, in a marriage without those negative emotions, it doesn't matter to go out and come in.

Marriage is a besieged city, it surrounds your love, relatives and family, there is no colorful fire in this wall, there is just a plain life of your family, outside the city wall can be colorful, but as long as you decorate with your heart, your small home can also be comfortable and warm, but if you go out once you go out, then you can't go back, because there is one less decoration, the small house will be dilapidated. Therefore, the fence is protection, a barrier, and there is no need to go out.

Because people who live in marriage want to come out, and if they want to come out, they will live separately and divorce each other.

Because people in marriage lose their freedom, they can enrich their lives, and have more rituals and romances in their lives, so that they will go out.

I think that in marriage, we must communicate with each other frequently, only in this way can we better solve the conflicts between each other, and also promote the relationship between two people and make the marriage happier.

Maybe most people will still come to the door before getting married, thinking that two people will love each other forever, but when they are together, they will find that you and her in marriage are really unsatisfactory compared to him when they are in love, and there is a big gap, so this kind of gap will make you gradually feel such feelings, which makes you very depressed and very painful, so in a scum-like situation, if two people can't run in well after marriage and compromise with each other, the relationship between two people can fall apart in a year.

Regarding marriage, many people say: "Marriage is a bent tomb of love, and it is a besieged city." ”

Even if tens of millions of people are ridiculing the drawbacks of marriage, tens of thousands of people rush to enter this "besieged city" every year to pursue their own happiness.

What exactly is marriage? Everyone has their own answers.

No matter how you look at marriage, it is undeniable that marriage needs to be managed, not something that can be achieved overnight, it requires both partners to spend energy, time, and affection to slowly temper it.

It doesn't matter if the two have nothing to say when they are temporarily silent, they are relatively speechless, so they are silent for a while, but lying quietly in each other's arms and being lonely, this is the ultimate manifestation of mutual trust between the two, and it is also the highest level. ”

In fact, nothing can be eternal, including love, even if two people once loved each other, there will be friction after marriage, and they will feel unhappy with each other, but over time they will give up this relationship, but they will not deny that they have loved.

Marriage is like a besieged city, where the people inside want to get out and the people outside want to go in.

The once beautiful wedding of the century, 7 years later, ended with both parties announcing their divorce, and the 7 couples who attended their wedding were also divorced, maybe you may ask, what's wrong with this world, is everyone not knowing how to love, walking and walking and scattering.

Two people in marriage are like water and fish, you feel inseparable from each other and rely on each other, but the cruel reality is: fish dies without water but water clears without wishAfter all, not everyone can do it like water, although no fish will be clearer, but still don't let you go.

So you are still water.

We always think in our subconscious that the person you can't let go of will also not let go of you, but the truth is always the opposite, don't assume the one you can't let go of will treat you the same way

We think that the person who needs our own protection will never leave us, but if we continue to move forward, the person who is slow will be left behind, and the distance between the two people will gradually increase, and when the pace of progress is inconsistent, the scenery we see is different, and the person who sees the scenery will also change, because.

There is never only one way to be happy, and it is not limited to one person.

So when you don't get a response for your efforts, or when you're disappointed enough to save up, there's always someone who chooses to quit.

When we become strong enough not to be attached to anyone, we just pursue our own lifestyle and goals, if the other half can be on the same frequency as you, it is lucky, if not in a tall straight line, please turn around in style. We don't have the time and energy to change a person, all we can change is ourselves.

Letting go of others is also fulfilling oneself.

Life is like a train, when you enter the station, someone gets on the train, and someone has to get off the train ......Accompanying a journey, letting go when it's time to let go, this is the best end, because there is not only love between two people, but also responsibility.

When two people are together because of love, they are destined to owe each other, because no kind of love can be repaid, so debt is the way and power of love.

Therefore, don't forget to work hard when you talk about chaos, because when you shelter yourself from the wind and rain, you can also hold an umbrella for others.

A good marriage is like a fish in water.

The perfect marriage is one that knows how to accommodate and tolerate, and the other knows how to stop in moderation.

Marriage and love are like a siege for many people, especially for many middle-aged people, when they have experienced the baptism of marriage, especially after the test of the seven-year itch, some middle-aged people often feel that it is good when they are single, so that they will not let themselves be bound by marriage, in fact, I have not felt like this.

Although it is said that in the days when two people are together, especially when two people have cultivated a positive result in love, and finally become husband and wife, it is a very happy thing, but when two people get married and form a family, they end their single life and face not only happiness and joy, but also face the relatively boring life of firewood, rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar and tea every day, and at the same time, the longer two people get along, the relationship will become weaker and weaker, and they will understand each other and say comprehensively, especially for each other's shortcomings, it is more in-depth, so in this process, the relationship between two people will naturally be affected to a certain extent, often allowing themselves to have a certain sense of loss and nostalgia for the days when they were single.

When the relationship between the husband and wife is not harmonious, there are a lot of estrangements and contradictions in the marriage, and in the case of which one is often quarreled about, I will be more emotional or single is good, more nostalgic for the single days I once had, but no matter what, life still needs to continue, I should still try my best to be a responsible man, therefore, this kind of thinking is just staying in the heart of a certain moment, more often than not, I still have to find a way to eliminate the contradiction and solve the problem with my love Li QishuAfter all, life needs to go on.