Why do many things convince others, but not yourself?

In life, in fact, we can find a lot of things, we can persuade others in life, but when we face the same problem, we find ourselves helpless, can not solve these problems, so why we can easily persuade others when we persuade others, without any help to ourselves, today I will share with you, my personal point of view. <>

First of all, I don't think people who have really experienced this thing have real empathyThere is often a saying called empathy, but there are a few people who have experienced the pain they have experienced, so when they are facing these things, it is difficult for them to get out of it, and when such pain happens to others, we may think that I understand your feelings, or say something that I can feel what you are feeling now, but in fact, the real empathy is not like this, when it happens to yourself, you may be really difficult to accept. <>

Secondly, I think that in fact, in life, especially when it comes to feelings, it is difficult for us to convince ourselvesThis is true for most people, when facing emotional troubles, it is difficult for us to convince ourselves that we have not passed the passage of time, and let these pains slowly disappear little by little, so why we can't convince ourselves in the relationship, in fact, it is also because we really haven't completely let go of this relationship, or for this relationship, you still have a trace of nostalgia, and you are not willing to let go of him completely, resulting in yourself being unable to convince yourself. <>

I think that even if we deal with many things, we may not be able to convince ourselves in the first place, but I also think that we should still think about it in life, noTo be too persistent in insisting on one thing, such persistence is meaningless, and only when you really come out can you get the answer you want.

Because everyone is often a fan of the authorities, and the bystanders are clear. You can see other people's things clearly, but when it comes to yourself, you are very confused and stubborn.

Many things will compete with yourself, and you can't get over the hurdles in your heart, because you will feel very uncomfortable when you touch the bottom line of your heart.

Because I don't empathize with this statement at all, when things happen to me, I can really appreciate the impact of things on me, so I can't convince myself.

Because everyone is different, everyone's thoughts are different, some things are easy for others, but difficult for themselves.

Because this is human nature, people are like this, you can talk about moving others, but you just can't get over this hurdle for yourself.

Because we know in our hearts that these truths are just self-soothing and can never solve the problem.

People always like to reason with others when they encounter problems, hoping to make others happy through their own advice. But when it happens to us, all the truth seems to be useless, and we can't convince ourselves at all.

It's never the truth that convinces someone, it's the fact that you say your truth at a given moment. Some time ago, my friend fell out of love and was in a very bad mood, so he called me out to drink with him and confided in me a lot. I told him a lot of reasoning at the time, and he nodded yes, and both of them were drunk that night.

When I woke up the next day, I asked him how he was doing, and he said that he was much better than yesterday, and I felt that the previous night's talk had not been in vain.

But is it really the truth that convinced him? I don't think so, it's just that he needs to talk to him at this moment, he needs to be comforted, and I happen to be talking a lot at this moment.

It doesn't really matter what I say, what matters is that I need to be there when he's alone. Even if everything I said was nonsense, he could find a reason for himself not to be so sad anymore.

We know that all the truth is nonsense, and we don't believe it from the bottom of our hearts, how can we convince ourselves? In the same way, when we comfort others, we always have the right thing on our heads, but we always can't accept it when we put it on ourselves. As mentioned above, I said a lot of things when I comforted my friend about falling out of love, but when I actually fell out of love, I still cried a lot.

When I fell out of love, there were people around me who comforted me with reason, but I really felt that I couldn't let go for a while. So those truths just go in the left ear and out of the right ear, and they don't enter the heart at all.

The great truth that I knew in my own heart did not appear at all at this time. This is actually the normal state of our lives, it's not that we can't convince ourselves, we just haven't thought about convincing ourselves.

Life is like a compass that keeps drawing circles, we can tell everyone that this is a fate, but we know in our hearts that this circle is never a standard circle.

We don't need to convince ourselves, we just need time to erase all sad memories.

I think that even if we deal with many things, we may not be able to convince ourselves in the first place, but I also think that we should still think about it in life, noTo be too persistent in insisting on one thing, such persistence is meaningless, and only when you really come out can you get the answer you want.

3. Many truths can easily convince others, but they can't mistake themselves, or because they are deep in their hearts and pay attention to their own self-feelings. In fact, for us, the reason why many truths can easily persuade others is not because others can easily accept this truth, but because the other party can accept the truth itself, so it is still a deep understanding, and for us, as the subject of self-feeling, we may reject some truths in the process of feeling this truth, and it is precisely because of this rejection psychology that we can't stand ourselves.

In fact, for us, many truths in life can easily convince others, but they may not really apply to ourselves, so we should start from our own reality, and selectively divide the truth, that is, if we need to be able to truly convince ourselves, and if we care too much about our subjective feelings, it will also lead to rejection, so we should overcome our own psychological fear.

Because of these truths, we don't feel them with our hearts. And after something happens to you, it's hard to calm your heart and accept these truths.

Because you don't believe in those truths in your heart. Understand that these are all self-deceptive doctrines.

Because I am very stubborn in my heart, I don't want to accept the opinions of others, I think I am not wrong, and I am very unconvinced.

There is a saying that is particularly good, the authorities are confused, and the bystanders are clear, in fact, this truth can better convince others many times, but it can't convince their own hearts.

Because when you reason with others, you are acting as a bystander, and when you convince yourself, you are an authority. The so-called authorities are confused, and the bystanders are clear. It's not that I don't understand some truths, but when it really happens to me, I still want to struggle a little more.

Because standing and talking without backache seems easy to do, it is actually really difficult to do.

Mainly because although I understand the reason, I always fall into this dead circle and can't get out.

He was able to convince others because these truths were exactly what he thought at the time, and he couldn't convince himself because it was not what he thought in his heart.

Convincing a person is hard.

We shouldn't impose our views on others, but what should we do if we want others to accept our ideas?

The first is to be sure not to argue, once there is a quarrel, even if you refute the other person speechless, the other party will not accept your point of view.

It's like a debate competition, do you think you can convince the opposing debater, no, you have to convince the judges and the audience.

Daily persuasion is also like this, express your point of view clearly according to logic, listen to the other party's ideas attentively, and then state your point of view again in a targeted manner, as for whether the other party accepts it, it is not something you can control.

Knowing this, you know that the other party will not be persuaded by you at all, and if you happen to agree with him, it may seem to you that you have persuaded the other party.

Meaningless debates are of little use except for wasting saliva in the mouth.

Most people believe in others and are not confident, even if they are right sometimes.

The fact that you can convince someone is that what you say makes sense and is convincing, and the other thing is that they believe in you.

When a person needs comfort and persuasion, it means that he has no idea anymore, and his heart is very panicked. And my friend's idea just calmed my soul and gave me a reason to face certain things in the future.

Not being able to say anything about yourself means that you are still convincing yourself that your point of view is still spinning in place, and you have not shaken off the shackles of your mind. Another point also shows that you are very unconfident and do not believe that your own methods can do this well.

Given your mental handicap, you can think differently, and even if someone gives you good advice, he is just an outsider, and he can't do something for you. So at the end of the day, you have to believe in yourself, that you have the ability to solve these things, that your way is right, because it's your own business. Of course, this is not aimless.

If you look at it another way, you might feel like these things might be easy to do.

And then I want to say that when you break through yourself, you will find that these things are easy. In this way your path in life will be better than before ...

Hope it helps! Thank you!!!

People are like this, they are very good at persuading others when they are persuasive, because the bystanders are clear, it is not their own business, so it is easy to say, once it comes to themselves, there will be a lot of things to consider, and their own thinking is also limited, because after all, it is their own business.

Usually people who are precocious are late maturers. The evaluation of others is always very level, but they can not always control their own things, this is a manifestation of immaturity, after experiencing more things, you will understand the truth, but also change your state of mind, go with the flow, can not be too wronged yourself, people do not for themselves, the heavens and the earth will be destroyed, when you understand these truths, you will naturally be much more cheerful, but also able to convince yourself!

It's because your mentality is not right, you convince others, what role are you standing in, what role are you standing in, convince yourself of what role you are standing in, think about it.

Because everyone's standards are different.

If you have too high a standard, you won't be able to convince yourself.

It is recommended to read more books on psychology.

There are 3 steps to follow here.

First, you need to be clear about the target of persuasion, and the focus of your persuasion should be on a third party with higher power, not on the opponent. So, you have to choose the scene first, and then attack if there is a third party.

The first critical point of control is called, Clearly Consuasing the Target. That is, you have to figure out who you are trying to convince. For example, if you are a debater, you have to convince the debater, not the other party.

Second, your purpose is not to prove your opponent wrong, but to prove that you are more important than your opponent. You can do this by deliberately exaggerating and abstracting it.

Why is that? Quite simply, only if you are more important than your opponent, you are the focus of the stage, and the people around you will put their minds on you, and the audience will be more likely to be moved. So, next, all you have to do is amplify your own importance.

Third, it doesn't matter if you lose in the end. Because there is no single dimension of winning or losing, even if you lose your opinion, you must show your best side.

ps: Get the notes.

It's an interesting question. It is true that some people always seem to be able to convince others with great confidence without any reason, while some may feel unconfident when they are justified. Why is that?

There are several reasons for this phenomenon. First of all, reasoning usually requires a certain amount of logical thinking and knowledge. If a person does not have these skills or knowledge, then he or she may feel unconfident or uncertain, which may affect his or her performance.

On the other hand, if a person has strong self-confidence and eloquence, he or she may easily convince others without preparation. This is because they are confident, have high self-confidence, and will not be swayed by the dissent of others.

Second, some people may be more accustomed to arguing and arguing than discussing and cooperating. These people may be more inclined to take an aggressive stance rather than trying to understand the other person's point of view. In this case, they may exhibit more impulsive and justified behavior.

Finally, some people may be more adept at using words and expressions to persuade others. They may use techniques to steer the conversation and make it difficult for the other person to refute or raise objections. These techniques may include using emotions or lies to manipulate the other person's emotions or beliefs.

Overall, reasoning and acting confident can be learned and improved in either case. If you want to become more persuasive or more confident, you can do so by improving your knowledge, practicing rational thinking, studying communication skills, etc. Most importantly, don't forget to respect other people's points of view and try to understand each other's ideas, so that you can build a real cooperative and win-win relationship.