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Parents who are all over the world, this sentence may be a bit big, but it is true that your parents are your heart. And as a child, your main job now is to study, life or something with your parents to help you do well, but you think about your parents, you may be scolded by your boss at work, and you don't dare to talk back, and you have to be careful at home to maintain, the pressure of your parents is much greater than yours, okay, it's just who to tell these hardships. Sometimes parents may be in a bad mood when they encounter some problems, they are easily excited, and the way is wrong, but looking at people on the good side, you think about it, we ourselves are not very good, and we will cause trouble to our parents, but parents often just talk and scold a few words, should we pay less love for you?
And empathy, if you are a parent, how to deal with these problems, of course, it is not right to often scold, you can communicate well with your parents, and you must also set an example yourself, so that parents can worry.
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Are you still young and don't choose to bear what else you can choose?
When you grow up and look back, these are floating clouds, and they are nothing.
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I think you're a good writer. Promising and should have a good IQ.
Some people are in their 20s and still can't write sentences.
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That's a problem of communication between adults, and adults should not quarrel in front of children if they have conflicts.
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In the eyes of adults, everything is wrong with us, and everything is right with them.
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In 10 years, it's actually a trivial thing.
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Parents feel that their children are their own personal belongings. Many parents will think that my own children, I can deal with them as I want, others can't control them, I have my own beating and scolding, and I can't love outsiders. The child is too weak to resist.
After all, the child is a child, and in the face of the sudden firepower of his parents, the child is afraid and at a loss on the one hand, and on the other hand, his wings are not yet full, and he does not dare to resist. Parents war children become cannon fodder, parents war victims, this is a sad thing for both parents and children, children are not at fault, for no reason to be involved in the war, too much harm to children. Parental quarrels can have a detrimental effect on the child, and the impact is even greater when coupled with the abuse and expulsion of the child.
Seeing that the parents quarrel with each other every day, and then concentrate on themselves, the child will not have any hope for the other half in the future, will be unwilling to contact the opposite sex, unwilling to fall in love, and will not even have the idea of marriage, and no longer believe in love and marriage.
Parents, as the closest and most trusted people to their children, should always let their children feel loved, rather than let their children feel heartache all the time. Children who grow up with love have a better chance of success. As parents, they should let their children feel the love and care of their parents at all times, not only reflect the love of their parents in terms of material needs, but also meet their children's spiritual needs and be a qualified "growth coach" for children.
Children grow up in the dislike of their parents, with no sense of belonging, no sense of security, and the only belief is to grow up quickly and leave this humiliating home as soon as possible; Parents may love their children, but this love is insignificant in the face of harm, and they will eventually taste the consequences of bad words.
To sum up, parents often quarrel and turn the finger on their children, and use their children as the object of emotional catharsis, which will cause great harm to their children, which is not the behavior of a qualified parent. Parents should learn to control their emotions, create a harmonious family environment for their children, and let their children feel the love and care of their parents, so that their children can grow up healthily.
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Because they couldn't help each other, so the persimmon picked a soft pinch, and the child was weak, so he sprinkled his anger on the child.
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Because parents are particularly angry and need to vent urgently, they will choose to beat and scold their children, which will cause harm to their children.
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The main reason is that this kind of parents treat their children as gas bags, so they will beat and scold their children when they quarrel.
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Because children are a vulnerable group, some parents use this way to vent their emotions when they are sad and sad.
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Because parents feel that they scold their children, it is to make them grow up better, in fact, this kind of behavior is unreasonable in my opinion, after scolding the child, the child really can't stand it, this is true, many people have such a tendency, there is such a behavior, because the child is in a stage where the heart has not really matured, has not experienced wind and rain, deep down in their hearts desire to be respected, loved, and free, so we must respect the child's decision, Don't blindly insult or criticize children, what they need more is encouragement, support and praise, now children have a wide range of channels to receive knowledge, respect children's ideas, children will respect their parents' behavior after all, give children face is to give their own face, many public occasions, many parents punch and kick their children, in front of many people directly scold their children, and then the children are red-faced, bow their heads, do not say a word, parents' behavior is really undesirable, many children have unspeakable feelings, He felt that this was terrible, that it had no face, and that it had hurt his self-esteem and that it might become a wound that he could not erase for the rest of his life. So parents and children are actually a fateful cultivation, always tell yourself what I'm doing, will he be sad if I do this, not after you scold, you will never feel that you are wrong, always feel that it is because he is wrong, I scolded him, so we can only get a good education after a traffic ditch with each other, I want to say that since the parents chose to give birth to us, we parents should be responsible, when the child makes a mistake, we are the criticism of the criticism, the education of the education, the praise of the praise.
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Essentially, it's because parents can't stand the oppression of life, they can't face all the negative emotions they have.
And by picking and complaining about the child to vent their negative emotions.
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Hello! The child is small. But 9 also has self-esteem. Being scolded by parents all the time will scold the child's self-esteem and easily lead to the child's low self-esteem.
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It's mostly because the child has done something wrong, and the intention is not bad, it's just a matter of way.
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The motive and starting point of parents scolding their children is to correct their children's mistakes and behaviors, and to keep their children on the right track. On the surface, it seems to be an absolute authority, listen to me, I am all right, but in fact it is the most demanding education for children, strict rules.
It should be taken for granted that children cannot be beaten or tempered, and that children understand things through beating and scolding, and understand and accept that there is a price to be paid for the wrong things they do.
From ancient times to the present, there is a saying in educating children that jade is not cut and cannot be made. I didn't teach my parents ever to raise them. Holding this concept to beat and scold children, I feel that I have a clear conscience and take it for granted.
Parents know deeply that the greatest sorrow in life is not poverty, not low income, but the inability to raise sensible and grateful children.
It's not for nothing that parents hit and scold their children. After many lectures to the children, they are reasonable and present the facts. If the child is left to be taught repeatedly, he will adopt the method of beating and scolding, the purpose is to let the child suffer from the flesh and skin, remember deeply and reflect on himself.
There are many ways to educate children, although scolding education is not advocated. But it is undeniable that the way of beating and scolding can play a positive role in educating children with special needs. The appropriate use of beating and scolding children can play a role in setting an example.
Let the child remember that if he does something wrong, he will have to take responsibility.
Children are naughty and willful, and some children sometimes have no effect at all just by preaching, and they are only the wind in their ears. Only by letting children taste the pain of flesh and understand self-discipline can they play an educational role.
Parents beat and scold their children in a violent way as a last resort, especially for rebellious children, and there is no way to communicate and persuade them. Through appropriate scolding, it can have a good effect.
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There are several reasons why parents take their children for granted.
First: Many parents think that stick education can establish the "majesty" of parents
Second: stick education "does work".
Third: stick education is the "spread of culture", many parents have tasted the taste of "stick" when they were young, and some parents think that stick education is effective.
In fact, can scolding education educate obedient children?
Parents should have a rational understanding of beating and scolding education. Some parents think that they provide a living environment for their children, give them a good opportunity to receive education, and it is natural for them to have expectations for their children, and it is natural for children to fail to achieve their parents' goals, which is the reason for their children, and it is natural to "teach lessons" to children.
The view of some parents is that "if you don't fight, you can't be successful". It also builds dignity. Obviously, this notion is wrong.
Parents implement it on children"Stick education"It is because parents feel that their children are not doing it correctly and are not considerate of their own difficulties. Hitting and scolding a child is a relatively incorrect behavior that may backfire and make the child become more and more disobedient.
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1. Traditional upbringing.
It is undeniable that the traditional concept of parenting still has a subtle influence on us, such as "if you don't fight, you can't make a weapon", "filial piety comes out under the stick" and so on. Because in the traditional concept, the relationship between parents and children is top-to-bottom, and there is no concept of respecting children and getting along with children on an equal footing. The respect of traditional culture is mostly focused on getting along with peers, but it is very lacking in the parent-child relationship.
2. Poor self-emotional management.
If the parents' minds are not mature enough, then it is a very heavy pressure and burden for the children. When encountering difficulties or setbacks in life, some parents are prone to vent their grievances on their children. When parents cannot meet their expectations of life or work, they want their children to follow his instructions completely, and if the child's performance is not satisfactory to the parents, then the parents will most likely beat and scold them.
3. Familiar growth experience.
Because they did not receive new knowledge in time, or because they lacked experience, some parents directly applied the original parent's discipline model, and as long as they did not comply with their parents' wishes, they would be beaten and punished in this way. Therefore, when he is unable to get his children to do things or live his way, he likes to discipline them in the way he is most familiar with.
4. Seek a quick and convenient way.
Some parents are too lazy to think of other ways to discipline their children, believing that beating and scolding education is the most convenient and effective way. Therefore, whenever a child makes a mistake, the first thing that comes to mind is to punish the child.
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Because parents are first and foremost born and raised, they have compulsory education for their children, and in the process of education, there may be situations where beating is used as a means of punishment; Secondly, parents are elders, respecting the old and loving the young is a traditional virtue, and the elders can educate the younger ones and even reprimand the younger ones. As a younger child, first of all, because of their parents, they have life, and from this point of view, they should be grateful to their parents.
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Most parents have two common problems:1Always think that you are for the good of your children, and do not put yourself in the shoes of your children's situation and mood.
2.When communicating with children, there is always a high-minded attitude, and once there is a disagreement"You'll understand later""I'm for your good"Something like that.
When I was a kid, I didn't like it when my parents compared me to other children. Even when there are children my age singing and giving speeches on TV, I feel very uncomfortable.
When I grew up, I also looked down on parents who compared their own children to other people's children.
So I really love my child from the bottom of my heart, and I never envy other people's babies, no matter what my child is like, I love him the same. But I still occasionally say in passing, this car is not driven like this, you look at the kid over there, how well he drives, you learn. Something like that.
After saying that, I immediately regretted it and explained it to him for a long time.
Have you ever thought that maybe your parents weren't what you thought they were?
They may wonder why children always feel that they are right and do not take into account their parents' feelings at all.
Only after becoming a parent will you understand what your parents thought back then. Parents will always be the people who love you the most in the world, don't get old and think about what they say, see more of what they have done for you.
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Many parents believe that stick education can establish the "authority" of parents
Second: stick education "does work".
Third: stick education is the "inheritance of history", many parents have experienced the pain of "beating and scolding" when they were children, and some parents think that stick education is useful.
Can scolding education teach good children with excellent character and learning?
Parents should rationally understand scolding education.
Many parents feel that it is normal for them to provide their children with a living environment, give their children good learning opportunities, and have expectations for their children.
Some parents have the concept that "if you don't fight, you can't be successful". Secondly, it can also establish prestige. Obviously, such an opinion is incorrect.
Parents use it for small children"Stick education"It is because parents think that their children are doing incorrectly and do not understand their own hard work. Hitting and scolding a child is quite incorrect behavior.
Will the use of "stick" education make children sensible?
Children are young, and through "stick education", some naughty children can easily admit their mistakes and remember their mistakes.
But,"Stick education"It is a kind of punishment for children when they make mistakes"Stick education"It's really energy-saving, and parents don't need to spend too much energy in this way, they just need to hit when their children make mistakes.
Stick education"It really works very quickly, and after the child is beaten and scolded, there will be a shadow. In order to stop being beaten, children will behave in their own way.
Why can scolding education be passed on forever?
Many people in life have been beaten and scolded by their parents when they were young. When parents use this method, we are really much more honest.
Because of this, many parents are aware of the kind of pain this method will cause to their children, and after the parents, they do not consciously use this method on their children. They were children of men, they know it"Stick education"It is the easiest way, and with such a method, it does not take a lot of effort to make the child very obedient. Summary:
Parents love themselves the most, they see the long term than us, don't be dazzled by love, otherwise you will regret it for a lifetime, life is very realistic, it is a lifetime, how about the man's economy, you will be very tired to be a stepmother, thankless, you have to have a child of your own in the future, men before and after marriage, think about it,
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