How do you feel when you see your parents fighting?

My parents are good parents and they love me very much. It's just that if there is an afterlife, I want to be smarter, and like other children, I will coax my parents and make them happy. Perhaps, they won't be so noisy.

My parents have been arguing for more than 20 years, arguing every day, no exaggeration, my dream when I was a child was the destruction of the earth, I never came home after school, and I wanted to smash anything I saw when I heard a quarrel in junior high school, but I controlled it, as long as I didn't want to hear any sound at home. As long as they quarrel, I want to feel like **.

After graduation, I watched my parents quarrel and fight, I got used to it, I felt very noisy, and then I put on earbuds and watched TV, I don't know how to watch them feel that their life was too funny, and I couldn't help but laugh a little tears, maybe subconsciously I will still be sad.

Extremely insecure, living in fear of divorce from parents since childhood, so since childhood, they will behave very sensibly, for fear that they will be unhappy and then quarrel or even fight, in memory they quarrel almost every day, hands or falls on the guy is also common, when I was a child, I would cry, and then I would not persuade to fight when I got used to it, but only remained silent.

For many years, they have rarely quarreled until now, and even began to deliberately avoid each other's existence, try to avoid meeting each other at home, and never have any communication other than that related to me. But I still remember those years when I was huddled alone in a corner and watched them insult each other, and they cursed each other with the dirtiest and most vicious words that seemed well-read to outsiders. I didn't dare to fight, I didn't dare to cry, I didn't even pretend I didn't care and said, "Separate," and they haven't separated.

And I didn't believe in love since I was a child.

My parents loved me very much, and they were never beaten by my parents when I was a child, but they were intimidated by the elderly.

I have also had the experience of being intimidated when I was a child, because the general environment at that time was like this, and parents would educate their children like this, so many children were rebellious and cowardly.

Intimidation of early childhood education is not advisable, we need to change, otherwise, our children will have the following situation.

Clause. 1. There will be rebellion.

When a child makes a mistake, parents do not use persuasion and education to talk to him patiently, but use violence to solve it, which will cause a psychological shadow to the child, and he will have a rebellious psychology in his heart for a long time.

will reject the education of parents and be unwilling to communicate with parents, anyway, in exchange for a beating. Therefore, they will hide their hearts, and over time, they may hurt themselves when facing problems.

Some children will beat their heads hard when they can't solve a problem, but this is actually related to the way their parents usually educate them. What's more, children will inflict this violent tendency on others.

When problems arise again, they will not be solved peacefully, but by force, and even hurt others.

Clause. 2. Willing to please others.

Children who grow up under the scare of their parents are prone to be willing to look at other people's faces to please others, and they will follow what others say they are not sure of their inner thoughts, speak carefully, and they will lower their posture.

Because of the fear that others will not like her, the fear of not playing with him, and the desire to please others everywhere, such children do not have their own independent character when they grow up, and they are easy to follow the crowd, and instinctively retreat backwards when they encounter difficulties, so it is difficult for them to succeed.

Thirdly, the child will become very timid.

Children who have lived in the scare of their parents for a long time will become very cowardly and timid, because when facing the parents of the **, they dare not show their hearts, and will only hide behind their backs and secretly observe the faces of their parents to please their parents.

In this way, the child who shouts will also become unbrave to take on problems and responsibilities when he grows up, evade and shirk responsibility, thinking that everything has nothing to do with him, because he has the impression that as long as he bears such a mistake, then he will receive a violent beating.

Clause. Fourth, children will lose trust in their parents.

If parents often carry out threats and intimidation education in the family, when the children are still young, they do not know that what the parents say is false and are all to scare them.

But when the children are older, they begin to have their own consciousness and judgment, they will know that their parents are cheating on themselves, then they will become more and more distrustful of their parents, and when they are really in trouble and danger, they will not want to say anything to their parents.

Our parents do not fight, occasionally quarrel, but not to quarrel, the family is a traditional family, husband and wife tolerate each other, understanding will be harmonious and harmonious.

It must be persuaded that parents generally take care of their children.

This is normal, and this kind of problem is generally like this.

1. The child's sense of well-being is missing. Often witnessing parents quarreling, there will be a feeling of family unhappiness in the child's heart, feeling that his parents are not loving enough, and the heart will feel that his family is broken, and the parents will often quarrel and quarrel because of trivial things, and even fight, the child will be afraid of the separation of father and mother, and will be very afraid of insecurity in his heart, and the sense of happiness will naturally be missing.

2. Character flaws are unavoidable. Parents in front of the child two of them are fighting, sometimes the more noisy the talk, the more fierce they are, they can't control themselves for a while, and they may even fight, showing the ugly side of human nature directly in front of the child, so it is easy to make the child anxious, affected by the original family environment, the child's temper and character will also be greatly affected, and the child's joke will also become explosive and irritable, will not be considerate of others, and even have a certain tendency to violence.

3. The heart is full of fear of marriage. Often facing parents quarrel or even drop things, tear each other apart, children see in their eyes, and slowly will be full of fear of their future marriage, will be afraid that their other half will be like this in the future, the story of parents will once again be repeated in their own source of disadvantages, the heart will be full of fear of marriage, will be reluctant to find a partner, and even unwilling to turn out, which is also a major reason for some fear of marriage.

4. Influence the future of work and parenting. Children who grow up in this environment will be covered with thorns, they will use thorns to protect themselves, it will be difficult to get along with them and not be united, it is easy to distrust others in work and life, and it will be very detrimental to work. Especially if you have children in the future, it will have a great impact on educating your children, and even affect the next generation.