My mother in law forced me to give birth to a son for the second child, how to continue the marriage

<>I thought that life would go on so peacefully and happily, but when my daughter was two years old, the country opened up the two-child policy, and my mother-in-law was crazy to hear the news, and asked the couple to give birth to a big fat grandson to her. At first, my husband and I disagreed, as far as I was concerned, the competition in the foreign company I worked for was very fierce, and I struggled from scratch to my current position after the last pregnancy, and if I got pregnant again, the position would definitely not be guaranteed. As far as my husband is concerned, he is also on the rise in his work, and he is very busy every day, so he really doesn't have time to take care of his children and me.

However, my mother-in-law lived directly in our house, almost every day, every moment, every sentence is inseparable from the "second child", saying how good the national policy is to encourage you to have more children, saying that whoever has a second child will give birth to a son is very happy, and all kinds of things can be pulled to the "second child". At the beginning, my husband and I would patiently tell her the reason why we don't want a second child, from the outside to the inside, all aspects of the reasons have been thoroughly analyzed, but my mother-in-law still insists on going her own way. Later, my husband was successfully promoted, and my mother-in-law nagged all day long, and he began to convince me to follow my mother's wish to have another one.

<>My husband and I were college classmates, and after graduation, he joined a design institute and belonged to a state-owned enterprise, while I joined a Fortune 500 private company. When he first brought me home to meet my future mother-in-law, my mother complained that my job was not in a state-owned enterprise, and his family was better off than mine, so the meal was really not delicious.

Although my mother-in-law did not agree with this marriage, my husband and I insisted that we get married. After getting married, my mother-in-law began to urge us to have children, and her words clearly revealed her desire to have grandchildren. In the second year of marriage, I got pregnant and gave birth to a daughter.

My mother-in-law turned around and left after seeing that it was her daughter on the day I gave birth, but after all, this was her son's flesh and blood, and she still helped take care of the child later, and she loved the child very much. Although she always talks about how she is not a son, she is already in the boat.

<> I wasn't working well in the company at the time, so after thinking about it again, I decided to follow my mother-in-law's wishes and have another one. A few months later, I became pregnant again, and my mother-in-law was sincere in her kindness to me, and I stopped thinking about work matters, and my mood was much better. However, when I was almost 3 months pregnant, my mother-in-law said that she had found a relationship and asked me to determine the sex of the fetus.

It turned out to be a girl, and my mother-in-law left in a hurry, and when she came home, she said to me, "Girl, why don't you get rid of this child, let's have another one, anyway, you are still young!" Hearing this, I really deeply understood that my mother-in-law is not my own mother.

Since I knew that I was pregnant with my daughter and refused to listen to her, my mother-in-law's attitude towards me changed sharply, not only sneering all day long that I couldn't give birth to a son, but also still clamoring for me to go. Although my husband also thinks that my mother-in-law is wrong, he can't control his mother at all, and there are more and more quarrels between us.

I don't know if this little life in the womb felt that the family did not welcome her, and I miscarried without warning. During that time, my whole body was in a state of sadness, but my mother-in-law didn't quarrel with me as if nothing had happened, and cooked with me and soup, with only one purpose, so that I could have another son.

When I firmly stated that I would not give birth, my mother-in-law changed her face faster than turning a book, saying that if she did not give birth, she would divorce her son, and our family wanted a daughter-in-law who could pass on the family to us! I was deeply desperate, and every day I quarreled with my mother-in-law and husband like a dynamite bag, and I chose to leave such a broken marriage. After the divorce, I was relieved, and although it is hard to take care of my daughter now, I am very happy.

I should have made this choice a long time ago because that home was not my home and I should have gone looking for my own home.

My first child was born to a daughter, my mother-in-law did not give me a good look, recently the country opened the second child, my mother-in-law immediately changed her face and asked me to give birth to a second child, but I don't want to have a second child, because my daughters are eight years old, and I got married late, and the child is an advanced maternal age, but my mother-in-law just wants to hold her grandson, this very tough idea makes me even more resistant, what should I do in this situation? Should I deal with my mother-in-law?

1.Showdown with mother-in-law

Although your mother-in-law's attitude is tough now, there is a chance that you can redeem it if you open up and talk to her. First of all, explain to your mother-in-law that having a child is decided by you and your husband, and you also have to consider the current economic situation and physical factors, not that you want to give birth, if you want to have a child for the sake of the future, you still have to be fully prepared to have a child, your mother-in-law is now serving the ant and simply wants to hold her grandson, it is not very unreasonable, and it is necessary to communicate with her.

2.Communicate with your husband

Regarding the idea that your mother-in-law wants you to have a second child, in fact, you and your husband are the ones who have the most right to speak and decide, and talk to your husband about their respective thoughts. Having a second child does not necessarily mean having a son, this thing is very clear, in the case of considering the economic situation, what will happen if you have another daughter? There are still many aspects to consider, you can't say that if you want to have a son, you will immediately bury yourself, and at the same time, you must ask your daughter what she thinks to see if she wants a younger brother.

3.Care more about your mother-in-law

Your mother-in-law now just wants you to have a son, and she doesn't say that she has to give birth to you, don't "fight" with her because of your mother-in-law's idea, what you should do at this time is to care more about your mother-in-law's inner thoughts, be more considerate of her daily life, when she feels that you care about her very much, she will consider your position, and the old man's heart is easy to satisfy.

By yourself and Dabao.

to decide, what is the matter with the mother-in-law?

It is not very important whether the husband is willing to bury his will. He is willing to give birth, and if he does well, I will have a second child with him. If he doesn't want to, if he doesn't do well, we will divorce, and I will have sex with someone else.

The womb grows on me, pregnancy, the pain of giving birth, I have to suffer, I can't decide whether to give birth or not? If I want to be born, I will be born, and if I don't want to be born, I will not be born. If you want to give birth to a few, you can have a few.

Those mothers-in-law want you to give birth to oranges, you will give birth, I will advise you, the child is your own, the body is your own, life is your own, a friend of mine is too, the whole family persuaded her to have a second child, only she didn't want to give birth, and finally gave birth, the mother-in-law left it alone, and finally she brought it herself, as long as you have one person to handle the energy and economic ability of the two children, you can do it if you want, but don't be exhausted haha When you live a life, complain about your mother-in-law for letting you have a second child, after all, she just said casually, But the child is born by yourself, and when you are born, you are responsible for him, and even more so for the boss.

In fact, in this life, it is the other half of me who accompanies me, no matter how many children there are, they are a part of our life after all, and children must have their own families when they grow up. I think the most ridiculous second child is to leave her a relative after a hundred years, at that time it is called a relative, a relative who leaves a relative during the New Year, and who else is kissed, and their respective husbands, wives and children are called relatives!

If I am myself, I will not be born, and I must know how to be happy. It's really not too comfortable for a child's life! Children, giving birth to one is called feelings, and giving birth to two is called tossing! To live a good life is to enjoy it happily! Don't add to yourself!

If I am willing to give birth, I will give birth, and if I am not willing to give birth, I will express my thoughts to my mother-in-law and ask my mother-in-law to respect her opinion.

The key to having a second child lies in your husband and wife's decision to take the world, without the mother-in-law's will or keen wishes, the important thing is to be able to figure it out yourself, to give them better economic conditions, to give them companionship, and at the same time you can feel satisfied and happy because of this.

Not raw. The pressure of having a second child is too great, and it is not something that others just talk about, and you have to bear it yourself if you give birth.

At this time, it is still up to you to think about it, if you want it, you can be ready, if you don't want it, you can make Lu Tong good with them, for example, the situation you are facing now, the job is just stable, and the family conditions are not very good, and it is not allowed or I feel that it is good to have a child!

I think giving birth to a second stool tire is to consider the actual situation of the noisy traveler touching Jianting, in addition to the economic and physical life considerations, if you can, then it is nothing to have a second child! If the conditions don't allow it, don't force it!

My mother-in-law is willing to let you have a second child, what should you do? It depends on yourself, do you want to have a second child? Is there anyone to help you take care of the child?

Or would you like to take care of the children at home? As well as the child's roll-over education, can you take care of it?

I'll decide based on my current state, if our life wasn't very good, I wouldn't have a second child.

There are subsidies for the birth and second child, and the state vigorously supports the birth of a second child, and there are many policies.

I will choose according to my own ideas, because this is my body, and I have the right to make my own decisions.

Actually, I didn't have to give birth at that time, because.

If you have the conditions to take the child, you can have it, because now that the two-child policy is open, you can also let the two children have a companion and not be alone, if the conditions do not allow, it is not recommended to have a second child.

You can start from several aspects, emotionally attack, tell your mother-in-law about your worries, afraid that after having a second child, you won't have so much time to see the older child, and let the child be spoiled, and then divert your attention. Either let your husband come forward, let her husband stand in the same camp as you, and let your husband explain his economic situation at that time.

You should discuss with your mother-in-law, after giving birth to your second child, your mother-in-law will help take care of Erbao, so that you can have the energy to work and take care of Dabao.

If the mother-in-law did not help you bring the first child, or the mother-in-law contributed or paid for it, you feel that the mother-in-law is okay in your heart, and you can accept that you want a second child, then you can ask for one, after all, he is now open, but if your mother-in-law just stood next to you and said cool words and did not help you take a day, and the child did not help you pay for it, don't care about it, don't listen to what he says, follow your own heart, you want it, don't want it.

Don't follow the advice of others when it comes to having children, follow your own and your husband's inner thoughts, and don't change yourself because of the advice of others.

Whether you are born or not should consider your own actual situation, not your mother-in-law's opinion.

When the two-child policy was liberalized, parents in many families strongly asked their children to have a second child. But for children, they don't want a second child, and they really can't afford to raise it.

Whether you want to have a second child or not depends on your inner thoughts and the actual situation of your family. If two people are very resistant to having a child and don't want a second child, in this case, they definitely can't have a second child. If your family conditions are very poor, even the money for having children is a problem, and even Dabao's quality of life cannot be guaranteed, then what do you want Erbao for?

Whether you choose to have a second child or not, you need to look at your family situation and what you really think in your heart. Your mother-in-law's opinion can certainly be used as a reference, but it cannot be used as a decisive factor.

The ideas of the two generations are very different, the older generation always thinks that raising children is simple, but we always want to raise children well. If you can't give your child good living conditions, and you can't give your child enough company, it's really enough to have a child.

Whether you should give birth or not should be born is a question that you husband and wife should consider. Your mother-in-law insists on wanting you to have a second child, if you resist in your heart, even if you have a second child under this pressure, when life is difficult or life is tight, what can your mother-in-law help you? How long can she help you?

Whether you want a second child depends on the two of you, and you can ignore your mother-in-law's opinion for the time being. If both husband and wife are willing to have a second child, then whether the mother-in-law supports or opposes it, the child can come and see the world. But if only the mother-in-law agrees, and neither of you likes it in your hearts, then don't let the child suffer with you.

Whether or not to give birth is never a question, whether to give birth or not is a question for you to consider, and the opinions of everyone else can only be used as a reference.

Let's discuss it with your husband, whether you are a family of three or a family of four, it is a matter for the two of you.

You can't give birth just because your mother-in-law wants you to have a second child, but ask yourself if you would like to have another one. To have a child is to get out of the ghost gate, and if you are sure you really want another one, you can have another child.

I think it should be born, it can be regarded as a kind of welfare and gift for the boss, but a person is actually quite lonely.

You should discuss this with your husband, and if the family conditions are good and the relationship between the husband and wife is good, you can consider having a second child. If it's not good, think about it.

Depending on your own situation, if a child has exhausted you, and the conditions at home are only enough to raise one, then a second child is absolutely not wanted.