How to deal with uncomfortable colleague relationships?

Getting along with colleagues, in fact, is not so complicated, in general, it is not to compete for favor, not to attack, not to fight, not to play tricks, not to compare the results of hard work, not to show off, not to be vain, to make progress in a down-to-earth manner, to commute happily, meticulous, to do things seriously, to be a low-key person, and not to punish yourself with the shortcomings of others!

1. Respect and stay away, for character problems, love to take advantage of small advantages, chew the root of the tongue every day, this kind of person will have contradictions, this kind of person will not think about changing him, he can't change, he can't change, and there is no need, this kind of person will reduce the intersection, just hide a little, avoid personal relationships, for this kind of person is not to be offended, not to make a fuss, "everything is a line, and it will be good to see each other in the future", do not approach, after all, out of sight is pure.

2. Don't offend, don't be partial, don't deliberately target anyone, the work itself lies in the duty, not to go to war with the enemy, not to join any small group, the focus is on the quality of the work and improving one's own skills.

Third, to reduce overdue, "colleagues" is a very fragile relationship.

What is a colleague? To put it simply, it is the people who work together, and many people will find that colleagues who get along well will be resigned, transferred, or transferred out once they leave; Slowly, contact was lost. There is also the usual "iron buddy", when there is direct competition of interests, the previous relationship may fall apart in an instant, so I think that for the relationship between colleagues, it is better to go with the flow, everything is fate, help if you can help on weekdays, and sorry if you can't help, plain and calm.

Fourth, within the scope of the ability to treat people with etiquette, try to show friendliness and altruism, for colleagues, can help, some harmless small concessions will be let go, etiquette to others, understand the rules, to create their own professional reputation.

5. Treat people rationally, treat things, speak and do things without any emotion, do business, don't say bad things about others, don't hit other people's small reports, know how to refuse, don't suffer yourself, be happy with others, treat things you don't agree with, don't make evaluations easily, don't spread rumors, don't believe rumors, and don't belittle others.

6. Be honest with each other, don't do things and don't be afraid of things.

7. Refuse to label socializing. It's not hard to find that once we label someone else, it inevitably forms a bias, and it is likely that the mention of this person will make you angry, and psychologically speaking, this bias is called "confirmation bias". For example, if you hear someone say that XX colleague will make a small report, you think that he will make a small report, although he has not made a small report, but you get along with him and think that he will make a small report.

Colleagues are people who work with them, and how well they get along with colleagues is directly related to the progress and development of their work and career. If the relationship between colleagues is harmonious and harmonious, people will feel happy, which is conducive to the smooth progress of work, thereby promoting the development of the career, on the contrary, the relationship between colleagues is tense, tearing each other down, and frequent friction occurs, which will affect the normal work and life. Hindering the normal development of the business.

To handle the relationship between colleagues well, the following points should be paid attention to in terms of etiquette: (a) Respect colleaguesMutual respect is the basis for handling any kind of interpersonal relationship, colleague relationship is no exception, colleague relationship is different from family and friend relationship, it is not a social relationship with family affection as a link, a temporary faux pas between relatives and friends, can be made up with family affection, and the relationship between colleagues is based on work as a link, once the faux pas, the wound is difficult to heal. Therefore, the most important thing in handling the relationship between colleagues is to respect each other.

2) Material dealings should be clearColleagues may have material exchanges such as borrowing money, borrowing objects or giving gifts, but do not be sloppy, and remember each item clearly, even if it is a small amount, should be recorded in the memo to remind yourself to return it in time, so as not to forget and cause misunderstanding. When borrowing money or things from colleagues, you should take the initiative to make an IOU to the other party to enhance your colleagues' trust in you. Sometimes, the lender can also ask the borrower to make an IOU, which is not excessive, and the borrower should understand that if the borrowed money cannot be returned in time, the borrower should explain the situation to the other party at regular intervals.

Taking advantage of the other party, whether intentionally or unintentionally, in terms of material interests, will cause unhappiness in the other party's psychology, thereby reducing one's personality in the other party's mind. (iii) Expressing concern for the difficulties of colleaguesWhen a colleague is in trouble, he usually chooses relatives and friends to help him first, but as a colleague, he should take the initiative to ask about it. Do your best to help with what you can, so that the relationship between both parties will be strengthened and the relationship will be more harmonious.

4) Don't talk about the privacy of your colleagues behind your backEveryone has "privacy", privacy is closely related to personal reputation, and discussing the privacy of others behind the back will damage the reputation of others, cause tension or even deterioration of the relationship between the two parties, and thus is a disgraceful and harmful behavior. （5) Take the initiative to apologize for your mistakes or misunderstandings between colleagues

Secretly observe the preferences of your colleagues, even if you are found to be looking at him, don't panic, return with a kind smile, the purpose of observing colleagues is to see his preferences, words and deeds, mood, tone of speech, etc., so that after slowly communicating with him, you will probably know what kind of person he is, which is conducive to further communication and good relationship.

Find the common ground and interest points between you and the colleagues you want to manage well, and consciously cultivate and develop that side, and when you communicate, there will be more topics.

Break the barrier, use the "materials" accumulated before, that is, the common ground and the points of interest, to chat happily;

The choice of scene is very important, the best time outside of work, such as lunch together, during the afternoon tea organized by the company, when the employee has a birthday party, etc., in short, a relaxed and pleasant atmosphere can make his already good mood better, and it is more conducive to you to promote the relationship between the two parties.

In this process, you should not only talk about your common favorite topics and points of interest, but also show your own highlights and show them a little, because any person will like to get along with excellent people, there is no doubt about it.

After all, it is a colleague, and you can take the method of not taking the initiative, not refusing, and not being responsible to deal with it!

If you don't take the initiative, you are an uncomfortable colleague after all, so you don't need to take the initiative to chat with him, otherwise you are asking for trouble and making yourself uncomfortable!

The second is not to refuse, after all, they are still colleagues, and there is no need to make the relationship very stiff, so if he comes to talk to you, don't ignore it! Otherwise it's rude! The third irresponsible is not to pay attention to everything about the other party!

First, prescribe the right medicine.

The problem is always there, and if we do not find the root crux of the problem, the contradictions will only accumulate day by day, and there will be more and more contradictions, so it is better to find the problem and solve it well.

2. Ignore it.

Out of sight and out of mind, instead of being entangled, it is better to want to be open, adopt a natural disposal method, and reduce the consumption of energy.

3.-for-tat.

If a colleague is really excessive, inch by inch, and constantly make you uncomfortable, then you can use a more direct way to clarify your position with the other party, and it is best to reconcile, if the other party insists on going his own way, there is no need to get used to him all the time.

Which way to go is a matter of careful consideration before you make a decision.

1.If a colleague annoys you, or if there is a conflict between you, don't speak ill of others, and be forgiving and forgiving. If you do something inappropriate in the future, the other party will be more tolerant and understanding.

But if you start with a conflict between you, you can imagine how tragic the consequences can be.

2.When faced with humiliation from colleagues in the workplace, we can feel that our dignity has been violated and our feelings have been hurt. But no matter how domineering and arrogant the humiliator is, we should still be in a sense of proportionality in order to ease our relationships and effectively maintain our dignity.

Remember: don't get angry. If you don't respond calmly, but lose your mind, you create an opportunity for the provocateur to put the other side in an advantageous position and put yourself in an even more disadvantageous position.

If the humiliation comes from your colleague, don't reciprocate the grievance, but explain to the other person that you feel the feelings have been hurt and make it clear that this is the end of it, otherwise it will be difficult for you to trust him anymore.

If someone deliberately embarrasses you by making a fool of yourself, you can break the ice and stop the embarrassment immediately. You can say, "I seem to be upsetting you, didn't I do something to upset you?"

Can you tell me? In this way, the other party is resigned.

3.How to use clever words to ease verbal disputes. When colleagues are arguing over their own opinions, the stalemate that is difficult to alleviate is often not the views of both sides themselves, but the competitiveness and competition of each other.

As a mediator, you should understand the feelings of both parties at the time, and do not rashly favor one over the other, so as not to become more dissatisfied. The right approach is to only emphasize the differences of all parties (not the advantages and disadvantages), and affirm their respective strengths and values, so as to satisfy their self-realization psychology to a certain extent. Based on this, it is easy to accept constructive suggestions that are suitable for all parties.

4.Use self-deprecation to defuse embarrassment. To laugh at oneself is to laugh at oneself.

In the workplace, self-deprecation reflects a free and easy attitude and a wise life. It can create a relaxed and harmonious conversation atmosphere, so that people can see your cuteness and human touch. Being deeply immersed in an awkward environment and "self-deprecation" at the right time and at the right time often has a funny and meaningful effect.

Sometimes it can even save face and build new self-confidence.

01 When colleagues face difficulties, as colleagues, we should help solve them as much as possible. When it comes to helping colleagues solve problems at work, methods are important. You can't blindly help her and him, it's easy to make the other party dependent.

The best way is to let him do it herself, it doesn't matter if she does it wrong or right. If the other person is doing something wrong, you can tell him the right way to try it again. If the other person is doing it right, you can tell her the better way to let the other person try again.

Only in this way can we solve the root cause of the problem, and at the same time, we can also enable colleagues to grow faster and improve their personal abilities.

02 When getting along with colleagues, don't always keep a straight face. I believe that many friends will always meet such a kind of person in their daily work, no matter when and where some of your colleagues will always have a straight face, never give you a smile. Just ask about a very happy work environment, but everyone is unhappy because of your stinky face.

So if you're such a person, it's best to choose to change it.

03If a colleague has helped you, you can try to thank them for a meal. Most workplaces in China are like this, and if someone else has helped you, it's better to say it. It doesn't cost a lot of money to invite someone to dinner, but by inviting someone to dinner, you can not only learn some work skills at the dinner but also deepen the relationship between colleagues, so why not?

04 It's best not to blame your colleagues for their mistakes in front of everyone. It is very wrong to blame colleagues for their mistakes in front of everyone, which not only does not solve the problem but also easily leads to the other party's rebellion, which is very detrimental to the next work. So if there is something wrong with a colleague, it is better to say it in private.

05 If you have strong hands-on skills, you can try to give some small gifts to colleagues. Who doesn't love to receive gifts? As the old saying goes:

The hands are short when it takes people and things, and the mouth is soft when it eats people. "It's not that they have received your gifts, but I believe they will take the initiative to help you when you are in trouble. When you get along with colleagues, you may wish to give small gifts, which can improve the relationship between colleagues.

06 When getting along with colleagues, don't speak ill of others behind your back. When speaking ill of others, it's best to think, "There are no impermeable walls in the world, what if you said bad things about others and let them know?"

The best way to deal with this is to say good things about others after the person, maybe it is because some of the good things you say help your colleagues, I think the other party will definitely remember it. Everyone knows how to repay kindness, and the next time you encounter difficulties, I believe that this colleague will also come forward.

07Complete your own work quickly and effectively. Work is actually a teamwork behavior, and people can't do all the work alone. If you do your job quickly and effectively, you will be able to help your colleagues.

1.Surpass him at work.

In fact, most of the time, colleagues don't get along because of work, after all, there is competition between everyone, and it is normal to have places where you can't get along.

As an adult, it must be difficult to be like a child after a quarrel, you can forget it after a nap, all relieved, the pimple in your heart will always be there, and the deterioration of the relationship may become more and more serious.

What to do at this time? It is inevitable to affect your mood, and if you want to reduce this impact, the first step should be to improve your work ability and surpass that person or those people in terms of performance.

The workplace is based on results and benefits, as long as you are strong enough, he can't accept it.

2.Get along well with leaders.

All of them work to earn money to support their families or to fulfill their dreams, and the reason for making friends is definitely at the bottom of the list anyway.

When you are clear about this, you should know that it is okay to get along with some colleagues, and you must maintain a good relationship with your leaders.

The leader is the manager, and he has the absolute right to say whether you go or stay, and you go and go up. If you have the support of your boss, it doesn't matter if your colleagues don't like you, because you still have a chance to get promoted and raised, and that's the key to grasping the problem.

3.Get support from others.

In a company, you can be at odds with one person or a few people, but don't be an enemy of everyone. If you don't have a good relationship with everyone, anyone will think it's your problem.

Therefore, when you can't get along with a few people, you must manage your relationship with other colleagues, and you can get the support of the majority of people, after all, it is impossible to be friends with everyone.

If you can really do it, it will take a lot of time and energy, and then the attention at work will be reduced, and it will even affect the work, which will outweigh the benefits. So, try to get the support of the majority of the people.