Why is communication so hard? Why do I find it difficult to communicate with some people?

Friends: Communicating with others in society is also the so-called "social", so we must pay attention to the basic etiquette of socializing: 1

When others talk to you, you must at least be able to answer, and you can't say the last sentence and you don't have the next sentence, or blindly say ahhh 2.When he left the table after eating, he said:

I'm done, you eat slowly. To be more elegant, you can also say, "I'll quit first, and everyone will use it slowly." ”）3.

Giving people water and food must be hands. 4.Remember to close the door when you enter the last one.

5.It's you who adapts to society, not society that adapts to you. 6.

Don't talk about the rights and wrongs of others, and keep yourself in charge. 7.When you say it, you have to do it.

If you can't do it, don't promise. 8.You will meet all kinds of people in life, and you can't fit everyone in tune, but one thing is universal:

How you treat others, others will treat you. As long as you can learn and follow the basic etiquette of social interaction, you will be able to handle interpersonal relationships (communicate with others) with ease. Be genuine, loving, and tolerant in your dealings with others.

Only by paying sincerity can we exchange for the sincere return of others; When a friend (or another) is in trouble, use your love to help others solve their problems. When others have different opinions from you, be tolerant of all kinds of opinions, and seek common ground while reserving differences. Your "three hearts" will help you get along well with others.

I just found it difficult, so I went to sales, as a salesman. I think you must have talked about everything with your friends in your circle, and you are very open-minded, and when you communicate with strangers, you don't know what to do.

If you feel that communication is difficult, you don't communicate with him, and people who are good at beating around the bush are not worth making friends with! Truth is truth!

Are these your own symptoms or someone else's? I have most of these examples! I can't understand the meaning behind the literal because I'm simple and believe in people!

Sometimes I can't grasp the main point or even the literal meaning because I am not too interested in what she is saying, or I have something else in mind. Anyway....I'm the type who can't see and hear.

The interaction between people is actually about an eye, some people have a temper at a glance, and some people are awkward ...... everythingThere is also a lot of personality that is very related, if the personality is not compatible, it is impossible to deal with it, and many divorces between husband and wife are incompatible personalities, not to mention the ...... between friendsIt's almost okay, don't deal with it if you can't get there!

Communication is an effective way to open the windows of the heart. However, once a person has something that is difficult to explain the cause, it is difficult to communicate.

Yes, there are indeed such people in life, and there are many, it is understandable, the ideas and opinions between people are different, and the level of education is not the same, so it is also difficult to communicate, and there is a type of person who thinks he is big, does not know how to pretend to understand, and thinks that he knows everything, and he doesn't say it when he meets such a person.

Adjusting your emotions first can control communication.

The second is to express your emotions, feelings, thoughts, not to judge the other person.

The third is to listen carefully, believe that others must be conveying something, pay attention to the relationship, not the content, and choose not to accept if the other party is very emotional. Don't interfere with other people's choices, use your emotions to understand others.

There are differences between people, that's why you need to communicate...

That's what communication is all about

Because of their personalities, some are extroverted and some are introverted!

The subject mentions "some people", so are these manifestations yours or the interlocutor?

If these four manifestations appear when communicating with others, in fact, there is no need to worry, people have weaknesses, and it is normal for these phenomena to exist without professional training and conscious cultivation of communication skills.

If the subject is discovering their own problems and thinking about improving them, which is a very wise behavior, the next step is to pay attention to how you think that people with good communication skills overcome these problems.

If this is the performance of others, the subject is inevitably a little harsh, no one is perfect. If the person really can't communicate, just give up, there are thousands of people to communicate.

Hope to be adopted.

Because each person is an individual, and each individual has his own unique thoughts and experiences. When two individuals meet and communicate, because everyone has different experiences, different ideas, etc., it is often difficult to communicate deeply.

If you only communicate superficially, there is no difficulty or complexity, but it is difficult to communicate in depth. Just like falling in love, two people like each other at the beginning and then try to show their best side, and then when they are together, they feel that they have already gotten or have been together for a long time, and it is difficult to continue to disguise, which will lead to the original person you are such a person.

We don't have other people's thoughts and experiences, so how can we empathize and communicate?

In essence, the reason why communication is difficult is that human beings are selfish in nature, people only love themselves, only like people who are similar to themselves, only accept ideas similar to themselves, and when they encounter people or concepts that are inconsistent with themselves, they can't help but reject them.

Because everyone is living with their own values, assumptions and beliefs, values and beliefs are the basis of a person's existence, when their values and beliefs are questioned and evaluated, people will always unconsciously protect and defend them, and they are very easy to be emotionally impulsive.

But is it the right thing to do? If you're right, you don't need to be so sensitive, and you don't have to defend yourself; If you're wrong, why be stubborn? The key reason is that when you see yourself as one with your own opinion, opinion, or concept, what others are questioning is only your opinion, but you feel that others seem to be questioning you, so you have to stand up and defend yourself.

At this time, it was just your own opinion, so you took it as the truth. But in fact, your opinion or perception is nothing more than your own mental assumptions, just your own experience. You form these value assumptions through your past experiences, and then you see these value assumptions as one with yourself and argue for them as a result.

Because if the values assumptions are questioned, one's identity is challenged.

Human thinking is unconscious, and when we are thinking, decomposing things, and making value judgments, we are not aware of it, and this has become a habit for us. The essence of thinking is to constantly look for problems and solve them, but in fact, many things are not problematic. Therefore, thinking is one of the problems, and the more thinking you think, the more problems you will have.

I don't know if you sometimes find it too difficult to communicate, but something so obvious that someone needs to say it again and again. I can't do it if I say it, and I can't do it right if I can't do it reluctantly, it's really terrible. Sometimes there will be a quarrel, obviously just trying to communicate one thing well, but in the end it will break up unhappily.

In fact, we can't communicate with others, and a very important point is the degree of matching of values.

When two people don't have the same values, they can't talk together at all. For example, A will think that going out to travel is to plan the itinerary, but B thinks that traveling is just to meet and go wherever you want. On the surface, it is just whether to make a plan, but it actually reflects a person's personality.

Some people just pay attention to rules and plans, and some people only care about mood, these are just different presentations of personality, and there is no right or wrong. Just if we want to come to an agreement with the other person. We have to say things that are in line with each other's values.

Or for example, if A wants B to plan together, you must agree with him first. Yes, yes, travel is to meet the beautiful scenery at will, come, how about you take a look at these beautiful scenery? Then I handed him the planned itinerary.

Before he knew it, he had finished reading the itinerary, and if he had any opinions, he would finish it in a back and forth chat. On the other hand, if B wants to convince A, he can also agree to say to A: "Ah, it's so happy to have a friend like you, everything is so well planned!"

Let A fly for a while, and then say, "If you come across a place that you like and have beautiful scenery, will you want to stay longer?"

A: "Yes."

B: "Then we will probably follow this plan, but not completely set the time, so that we can see more when we encounter good scenery".

Well, the communication between the two sides was perfect.

The first point is to identify with each other and praise each other first. No one likes to go against someone who is against them. If we want others to follow our ideas, first recognize them.

It is not necessarily a recognition of what the other party says, but also a recognition of the other party's intentions. Generally, only those who have the heart to do things and those who have really thought about it have ideas.

First, adjust the values to the same, so that the other party realizes that each other has the same goal and there is no antagonism. It will be easier for the other party to listen. But often in our daily interactions, the first reaction is to refute.

If the other party does not agree with him, he will refute it first. And then it was even more difficult to talk about. Empathy, when we put forward our own opinions, we don't like others to dismiss us all at once.

Even if what we say is not accurate enough, we should at least ask the other person why they think so. Only by knowing why the other party thinks so can you figure out his intentions, and then you can communicate with the other party with the right medicine.

Communication requires skill, and sometimes we speak louder than others, saying that we win others, but it can be noisy. Sometimes just changing the way of expression, changing the order of expression, can make others listen to you. When we complain about other people's poor communication, we can actually examine our own expressions.

The main reasons why it is difficult to communicate:

1. The individual is too personal and does not care about others.

2. The gap between the interests of the two sides is too great to reconcile.

3. The individual is too closed, does not interact with others, and holds the incomplete.

4. Because of their own or the other party's cautious taste and grade are not enough, there is no common language.

The so-called communication starts from the heart and should be treated sincerely. If it's because of the wide-eyed nuclear communication, you must first dispel his hostility towards you before communicating. The atmosphere and tone of speech are important.

The most important thing is to know how to empathize and think from the other party's position. If you have to talk about the person's shortcomings in the process of communication, it will be easier for people to accept their strengths first.

I was like this in high school before, I just didn't like to listen to other people's teachings, even if I knew it was right and good for me, but I just didn't like it, and I would rather others say some nice slander. The main reason is that the pressure of my life at that time was really great, the college entrance examination was coming, and then I encountered some difficult things to solve in my life at that time, and I was very irritable and listened to some people's bad words, which was really uncomfortable. You said that you won't comfort me, even if you still say these things to me, although they are all right, but they are really true.

However, I was not the only one who had this situation at that time, almost everyone around me had this mentality, is this still a common problem of our post-95 generation? When I was a child, I listened to the teachings of teachers and parents a lot, and I was irritable, but now that I have grown up, I am still in adolescence, and I don't like to listen to the truth with the help of rebellious psychology, after all, most of the truth is hurtful, and I only like to listen to those nice words?

In addition, at our age, we really want to hear the affirmation of others, and we don't want our abilities to be denied or doubted by others. Especially for a very good and strong person like myself, I especially want to be perfect, at least try to show my perfect side in the tears of others, and I will always try to correct any shortcomings. But you've worked so hard to correct it, why do you want to hear someone else's denial?

Because everyone's way of thinking is different.