A little humor, a joke that makes girls happy

Disgusting jokes.

The eldest and second took the plane, and the second was airsick and kept vomiting. The bag was full of vomit, and the boss had to go to get the bag, and when he came back, he found that all the people on the plane were vomiting. The eldest asked the reason, and the second said:

I saw that the bag was also full of vomit, so I had to drink half a bag again, and they vomited it all. ”

A man saw a big sale in a shop and walked in. "What do you buy? "I want to buy dog food.

We have regulations that you have to prove that you have a dog. "Where is such a rule? "That's what it's like for sale items.

The man grinded with the salesman for a long time, but the salesman still did not agree to sell it to him. There was no way, so the man had to go home and bring the dog, so he bought dog food. A few days later, the man went to the store again to buy cat food.

Give me two boxes of cat food. "We have regulations that you have to prove that you have a cat. "It's still the salesperson, and the man rubbed with her for a long time, but he still had to go home and bring the cat to buy cat food.

After a few more days, the man came to the store with a large cardboard box with a hole in it and found the salesperson. "What do you buy? "You put your hand in and know.

The salesman put his hand in: "What is it, sticky." "I want to buy two rolls of paper papers.

Some people like the dish of "spicy vermicelli pot". Once, he went to a restaurant and ordered this dish again. But the waiter told him that the dish was sold out.

Is it really sold out? He asked disappointedly. "Sir, it's really sold out.

You see, the last one was sold to the gentleman at the table. The waiter said. The man followed the waiter's instructions and saw a very decent gentleman sitting next to him.

The gentleman's meal has been almost eaten, but the "spicy vermicelli pot" is still full. The man felt that the gentleman was wasting delicious food, so he walked up to the gentleman, pointed to the "spicy vermicelli pot", and asked politely, "Sir, do you want this?"

The gentleman shook his head graciously. So the man sat down at once, picked up the spoon, and devoured it. After a while, he found a small mouse lying at the bottom of the casserole, but with all its fur grown.

In a flurry of nausea, the man vomited all the vermicelli he had eaten back into the casserole. When he was there with a tumbling stomach, the gentleman looked at him with sympathy and said, "It's disgusting, isn't it?"

I was the same just now. ”

One day, I came to a stall and held out two fingers to the boss and said:"Three skewers of lamb skewers"The boss said:"Yes? "I held out three more fingers and said:"Come on two strings"...

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1. After being with me, you can wash the dishes if you want, and wipe the floor if you want to wipe the floor, which is free enough.

2. As long as you want, when you are lost and frustrated, when you need a shoulder, tell me, and I will appear immediately.

3. It's so windy outside today, I'm so scared. If everyone else is scraped away, I can't scrape it away, that's a shame.

4. Don't be naughty, I've practiced qigong for a few years, and I can make people cry.

5. I really love you, I closed my eyes, thinking I could forget, but the tears I shed did not deceive myself.

6. I do all kinds of evil, all kinds of bad problems, and I hope you will take me for the people.

7. Fortunately, I'm not with you, otherwise on such a cold day, I would have to reach out and type back to your message, hum.

8. If there is something I don't like about you, please overcome it yourself.

9. Every time I feel frustrated, I recall your smile and your encouragement, which make me strong to face it, thank you.

10. I can't forget you, you have the best back in the world.

The humorous jokes that make girls happy are as follows:

1. On the first day of school, I beat my tablemates, and the teacher said that I should call my parents. I said, "It's okay, I can beat him by myself!"

2. Male: Marry me! F: Do you think we will be happy when we get married? M: Absolutely. F: How do you know? M: You are such a gentleman, even if love is not good, friendship can last forever.

3. The doctor asks the patient how he broke the bone. The patient said that I felt that there was sand in my shoes, so I held on to the telephone pole and shook my shoes. One of them passed by and thought I had been electrocuted, so he picked up a stick and gave me two sticks!

4. A: Old classmate, I haven't seen you for a long time, how much is your annual salary now? B:

3 million. A: That's 200,000 or 300,000 a month?

B: Socks Yes, this is the basic work of early investment. A:

Well, what? B: Dreaming.

5. A drunk man accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by to watch, and a policeman came over: What happened? Drunk: I don't know, I've just arrived.

6. On the road, I met my dad buying lottery tickets, so I asked him: "Dad, if you win the jackpot, how do you plan to spend it?" ”

7. "Our manager said: To sell insurance, you must have a shameless spirit" "This is the reason why you go into the women's toilet to sell insurance!" The policeman asked.

8. One day, the home ** rang, because it was not answered at the door of the parents' room, but my parents did not answer, so I had to put on my clothes and get up to pick up **, only to hear my father say at the ** end: Send me the TV remote control.

9. Male: Silly girl, why did you reject me back then? F: Because every time I see you, my heart beats fast and my face blushes, and I thought I would get sick and die with you.

10. Xiao Li in the office said to Xiao Zhang: "Tell you a good news or a bad news, which one to listen to first?" Xiao Zhang: "Bad news." Xiao Li: "The good news I'm about to say is false. ”