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It's normal for me to have this kind of thing, everyone will encounter this kind of interpersonal problems, and the most important thing is to persist in overcoming it by yourself.
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You communicate with your husband about this, don't let their trivial things affect the relationship between the two of us, and let your husband watch it.
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You choose to split up, and it's better to live another way.
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For the sake of your young couple's happiness, your mother-in-law and aunt should be accommodating and tolerant. Otherwise, it will backfire. Is this what they want to see? As a daughter-in-law, you should also learn to be tolerant!
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This kind of eldest sister is really afraid that the world will not be chaotic, and when you encounter such a thing, you will directly tell your husband that if he trusts you, he will not quarrel with you because of your aunt's tricks.
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In fact, the real deep feelings are not something that others can influence, or the relationship is not solid, and others have an opportunity. You tell me?!
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As the younger generation, we must do a good job of communicating with the older generation, and we must not let the atmosphere of discord continue.
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It's definitely going to have a little bit of an impact, but there are some things that don't need to be taken care of. It doesn't matter if you think about others, you still have to be angry for a long time, who is the best deal, angry and hurtful.
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You should have a good conversation with your husband, otherwise your husband is really influenced by them, and your aunt is really jealous that you are living too well, so she has been instigating your husband like this.
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In fact, when you get married, you are afraid that your family will mix in, and many things are run by you and your lover together, so you don't have to care too much about what others say and how to provoke.
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Reduce head-on conflicts and see each other less often. This should be a cliché, and it is clear that quarrels rarely solve practical problems. Ignoring it often causes the other party to make it even more difficult for themselves.
The best way is to keep a safe distance, live separately or work less, etc., of course, the specific details need to be communicated and negotiated with the husband, in short, try to take some personal cultivation to solve it as the first choice.
Tips to avoid quarrels.
1. Tip 1: Don't often turn over old accounts.
Two people have been together for so long, both parties will always make some big and small mistakes, husband and wife get along with each other, for past mistakes, don't often mention them, these old things, it is easy to escalate the quarrel. The other party has made mistakes, and he has also made mistakes, so when is it a head to blame and blame? Therefore, forget about the past, and what you encounter now, you should also talk about the facts, and do not involve the past.
2. Skill 2: Quarrel-for-tat, learn to deal with it coldly.
Sometimes the quarrel reaches the point where there is no need to back down, and there is no need to quarrel anymore, because both sides will not back down, it is too tiring. It's better for everyone to pause the quarrel first, rest and rest, calm down and think about it, if there is any solution to it, whether you are not doing well, or whether you have room for compromise, tomorrow.
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First of all, you have to find your husband to mediate. You and your husband don't need to mix your mother-in-law and sister-in-law in your married life, you can euphemistically express this meaning to your husband: don't let others interfere in the family life of the young couple.
Secondly, you and your husband must have an independent life and not live with your mother-in-law and sister-in-law. They don't need to be helped, and they are self-reliant.
Again, treat people with sincerity. Consider from the position of the eldest sister-in-law and mother-in-law, and reflect on whether there is anything inappropriate in your behavior. Communicate with them more, try your best to mingle with your sister-in-law, and then break up your mother-in-law's front.
If they are unreasonable, they will try to destroy your marriage. Your husband is also stupid and doesn't think about you. Forget about divorce, who is not raised by biological parents, why should they marry into your family and be bullied by your family. I can't afford to provoke and hide
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It's quite normal for mother-in-law to do this. She is good to you on the surface because she wants to maintain a harmonious family atmosphere, and behind the scenes she complains to her eldest sister because in the face of her daughter, she can say whatever she wants without scruples.
In order to maintain family harmony, the mother-in-law is reluctant to show her dissatisfaction on her face
The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a very difficult interpersonal relationship. It is very difficult to get a mother-in-law and a daughter-in-law to get along like a mother and daughter, after all, both of them are closely related to a man, and it is normal to have a gap in their hearts. However, not all mothers-in-law or daughters-in-law will show their dissatisfaction with each other, because life will go on and they will have to live as a family in the future.
If the nose is not the nose and the eyes are not eyes to the family members all day long, how can life go on.
The mother-in-law has a dissatisfaction with her daughter-in-law and needs to vent
A new member has been added to the family, and the daughter-in-law did not grow up under the nose after all. Although for the son, the daughter-in-law is the person he loves the most, but for the mother-in-law, the daughter-in-law is a stranger and a stranger who is married to the son. For such a person, the mother-in-law will definitely be picky in every way, even if she is a daughter-in-law who is very popular in the world, the mother-in-law can find a bunch of faults.
And for the sake of family harmony, the mother-in-law can't say it to her son, so she can only nag a few words to the daughter of the same party, which is actually a human nature.
Be kind to your family and try not to expose your shortcomings in front of your mother-in-law
Since your mother-in-law has not expressed her dissatisfaction with you, and she is also very good to you on the surface, this at least shows that your mother-in-law is willing to live in harmony with you. There must be a lot of generation gap between two generations who are strangers, as long as you are willing to pay sincerely, treat each other as your elders, and often care about her, your mother-in-law will also be moved. In addition, you must always pay attention to your words and deeds, if you have a particularly obvious problem, such as laziness, love to support others, etc., don't show it in front of your mother-in-law, because this is obviously sending your own handle to the other party, and your mother-in-law can't complain if she wants to.
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Maybe this is the set behind the set in front of you, or the other party's personality is like this, maybe it's because you don't do some things properly, and the other party will treat you like this. You should use your actions to influence the other party.
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is because the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is relatively serious, although the other party is better to you on the surface, but in fact, he doesn't like you at 1 point, and he often picks thorns; Usually respect each other, understand each other, try not to offend your mother-in-law and eldest sister, and be sure to do what you should do.
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Maybe you have something that hurts the other party, or makes the other party particularly disappointed, and the other party is particularly desperate, so you will treat yourself like this, usually think twice when you do things in the future, think more about the other party, and treat the other party as your own mother.
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They will always feel that their daughter-in-law will always be foreign. I think you can try to tell them what you're thinking. Let them open their hearts to you.
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The best way to do that is not to get along. Since they are all difficult people to get along with, there will be less interaction with them, and less interaction will make fewer mistakes. If something happens, you can ask your husband to come forward.
Look at him to negotiate, you don't come forward. After a long time, he also thinks that you are quite indifferent, so he doesn't like to deal with you. And you don't have a conflict of interest.
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Although the relationship is not good, but there is no problem that cannot be solved, first of all, you respect your mother-in-law as an elder, try not to conflict with her head-on, it is best for you to live separately from your mother-in-law, bring some gifts to visit during the New Year's holidays, and remember your mother-in-law's birthday, so that distant relatives and distant relatives can produce beauty from a distance, and the contradiction will be reduced slowly.
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The relationship between you and your mother-in-law is not good, plus a sister-in-law who loves to mix, so your relationship is not easy to deal with, so you can communicate with your mother-in-law often and then understand your mother-in-law's difficulties more Let your mother-in-law also understand your difficulties People's hearts Change people's hearts You can empathize with it, so that I think your mother-in-law can get along with you a little better, and your sister-in-law who loves to mix You can also talk to him and let him empathize so that you will get along harmoniously In fact, the relationship between you is to understand each other and tolerate each other, so that there are not so many things.
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I think it's best for you and your mother-in-law to live separately and bring something to visit during the New Year's holidays. And if you don't live together, you will reduce conflicts. As for the eldest sister, it's okay to be courteous. Cold treatment is the best way not to exacerbate the conflict.
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Between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, you have to be generous in case of trouble, don't say it's a matter of weight. For this sister-in-law, you are more willing to let him. But don't get used to him.
It's not easy for your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to get along with each other, you have to be generous, and don't go through some things with her. Be humble to each other, so that life will be good. Will your husband not be splinted when he is face-to-face?
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The relationship between the daughter-in-law and the mother-in-law is indeed very delicate, and there are good ones, but the bad ones are the majority. I think it is necessary to deal with the relationship with the mother-in-law, and the daughter-in-law should do the following: The first is to be generous-minded, what the mother-in-law says, do what is right, listen to what is wrong, and then explain later, don't talk back to the mother-in-law.
Second, she has a cheerful personality and calls her mother-in-law mother, shouting diligence and dessert. Third, on birthdays and New Year's Day, buy some gifts for your mother-in-law, such as clothes, or give some pocket money, and your mother-in-law should also coax her. If you do this, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will definitely be fine.
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The contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is an eternal problem, few families can solve it, the best way is not to live together, so that less meeting and contact, can reduce a lot of contradictions.
Originally, if the mother-in-law is a person, and her personality is not so strong, she is diligent and hardworking, and usually does not speak ill of her daughter-in-law, and the daughter-in-law is more tolerant, can tolerate some bad habits of her mother-in-law, and can get along with each other. The complexity of the problem lies in the fact that there is a sister-in-law at home, she generally can't rub the sand in her eyes, and she doesn't want her mother to suffer a little grievance, even if she does a good job, she will pick bones in the eggs and find faults everywhere, and even more excessively, she will blow the big contradiction of sesame seeds into a grinding plate, and she has nothing to do everywhere, fanning the flames, and playing with right and wrong.
Therefore, if this is the case, it is best to move out and live in less opportunity for the eldest sister-in-law to tell the truth, otherwise the family will always be noisy and difficult to be quiet.
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The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not good, and there is a sister-in-law who loves to stir up, the delicate relationship between them should try to coexist peacefully, and there can be less contact at ordinary times, and they can only get together on weekends, so as not to have a head-on conflict, and if they are unhappy, they can leave in time.
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This problem is relatively simple, if you have money, it is easier to solve, and it is good to coax them to buy some small gifts and snacks! Poor couples mourn for everything, which is the reason for lack of money!
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The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is the most difficult relationship in China, you say that the subtlety is more appropriate, if you want to deal with it well, then you need to let go of the mustard as a daughter-in-law, and communicate with your mother-in-law openly and honestly, and you must treat your mother-in-law as your own relatives, and you also need to suffer more, suffer a little, and pay more, which is a manifestation of your kindness and honesty.
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It's okay to try to have as little contact as possible, and to mix things between them less. Don't speak ill of one side in front of the other.
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In this case, it is best to say that you live alone, not to say that it is impossible to live with this mother-in-law and sister-in-law without contradictions, there will definitely be contradictions, so it is normal to get along badly, so the best way is to say that you and your husband are single, and then this means that if there is any problem, it can be solved independently, and alas, there are not so many contradictions that come and go, alas, there are not so many contradictions that come and go, alas, try to avoid contradictions.
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First of all, it is best not to live together, because if you live together, all kinds of conflicts will arise, and if you keep a certain distance, everyone will be polite. Secondly, be sincere to people, there is a saying called Lu Yao knows horsepower, see people's hearts over time, if you are sincere to your mother-in-law, you can also avoid a lot of contradictions, the third is to have a bottom line, because you are also a life, not allowed to be abused by others, I want to do these three points, basically the relationship is easy to handle.
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Do your own thing, in fact, don't worry too much about this family relationship, just do what you have to do, it shouldn't be so difficult. Getting along with your mother-in-law and father-in-law is the same as getting along with your own parents, so there shouldn't be too many problems.
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This is originally my husband's relatives, the most appropriate way to deal with it is to let your husband come forward to communicate with his relatives, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law mainly depends on the attitude of the husband, he as an intermediary, if he is in front of the family, respect you, care for you, then his family is not bad for you, if the sister-in-law is mixed with your family, your husband should come forward to maintain your family, relatives are of course, but the person who is close to you should distinguish which things she should be in charge of, and which things are not in her charge, It all depends on your husband's attitude, hope, thank you.
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