There are more and more next generation relatives phenomenon, what kind of psychology is generally

So, why is there a phenomenon of "next-generation relatives"?

When many elderly people are parents by themselves, they have no time due to busy work, because they are young and ignorant, or because of other conditions.

Some have not been able to accompany their children often, and some have been too strict with their children and even beaten and scolded their children, and they feel guilty about their children in their hearts.

Now that my children have grandchildren, they will turn this guilt into compensation for their grandchildren, hoping to make amends.

Therefore, they will pamper their grandchildren in every way, and even turn a blind eye to their grandchildren's "out-of-line" behavior.

Elderly people with grandchildren have basically entered old age. Since he has left his job, he has little contact with colleagues and friends, and his body has gradually begun to age.

In the process of getting along with grandchildren, there is a sense of anxiety that the years are about to pass, and there is a fear of separation from the children.

For the sake of inner sustenance, it is easy to transfer all your love to your grandchildren, so that your grandchildren can grow up in doting.

As they get older, the elderly now have a very mature view and understanding of things compared with when they were younger, and they see things more comprehensively and more tolerantly.

Things that I used to look at when I was young, or what I thought were wrong, are now acceptable, understood, and tolerated.

Therefore, they do not care about the offense of their grandchildren and "don't understand the rules", on the contrary, they will think that the children are innocent and cute, and can make themselves happy.

Due to the strong blood relationship with grandchildren, the elderly will be very kind to their grandchildren and have a strong sense of protection. If they see their parents scolding their grandchildren, the elderly will stand up for it as a matter of course.

When the grandchildren are in need, they will try their best to meet the various needs of the grandchildren, regardless of whether they are reasonable or not, even despite the opposition of their parents.

Due to the excessive spoiling of the elders, the child will form some bad habits and the personality may become selfish and domineering, which makes young parents very worried.

In order to avoid children being affected, parents should carefully analyze the reasons why the elders spoil their children, warn the elders to understand what true love is, know the harm of doting, and appropriately adjust the way of education.

Let the child learn the rules and not touch the bottom line, so as to give the child a better future.

The first psychology is that they are old, and then the little baby looks very cute, so it is particularly close, the second psychology is too doting, the family conditions are too good, which will lead to such a phenomenon, and the third is the lack of a child's psychology, and there is a child in the palm of the hand.

It is generally caused by guilt and anxiety, and guilt is that the grandparents have some regrets when educating their children, so they put all their love into their grandchildren, sadness.

Mainly because the parents of the children have their own family careers and often do not see each other, and the grandparents, grandparents and grandparents have nowhere to store their love, so they pin their love for their children on the next generation.

Personally, I feel that the phenomenon of intergenerational relatives is also very common, in fact, the reason for this phenomenon is because I have a very good relationship with my older generation.

The elderly will have a loss of social function, and they are not the owners of complete social functions, so they will focus on their own generations, such as the grandchildren's generation to obtain the unsatisfied part of the social psychology.

I think that the next generation is that the elders know how to love their children more after they reach a certain age. That's why there is such a saying.

The next generation is because the older generation is older, and there is a small natural intimacy around them, who sees that the child doesn't like it, so there will be the phenomenon of the next generation.

The most exaggerated I've ever seen, the next generation. That is, seeing their grandchildren through their own children, and their grandchildren like them very much.

One. Especially when we are educating our children, sometimes the children are very angry with you, how can you not listen? Even adults have to feed them when eating, so when we shout loudly or are about to do it.

Her grandmother couldn't sit still next to her. You see, you hit it and try it. Maybe when we were young, our parents might kick us well, sit there and eat well.

But his grandchildren were not willing to give up.

Two. It is said that the file is a kiss, and the scolding is love. But in the eyes of parents, their children should be beaten and educated, but in their grandchildren, they are very distressed.

Not willing to fight, not willing to scold. When children don't study well, how can we talk and don't listen? How can you say it and not listen to it?

We even want to get our hands on him. If you are louder than him, can't you remember it? didn't teach the child down, and called grandpa.

Can't you just be gentle with him? You see it scared him, don't learn. It's just that there are grandparents who are used to it.

The children are all dancing in front of us. Don't listen to us.

Three. It is said that letting children participate in the summer camp can make children really become independent, let them know how to cherish the current happy life, and learn to endure some hardships in the living environment of the body. will become stronger.

So you didn't take anything with you when you left? Parents just want to exercise and exercise their children better. But the grandparents saw that Douhong couldn't go on, so they didn't bring anything, and let the children eat and drink what they would eat and drink there.

What should I do if I'm hungry? Secretly put money in the child's pocket. It's okay, don't let us bring it, let's buy it and eat it ourselves.

told the teacher that he was not allowed to bring his grandparents, but he put them in his pocket. You don't say who knows so many things. Our grandparents kept educating us, and we could only nod our heads and not dare to quarrel with them.

In order to protect their grandchildren from being wronged, the grandparents tried their best to fight wits and courage with the child's parents. Same as I thought, so be it!

After having children in the family, most grandparents will love their children more than the children's parents, which is the legendary "intergenerational parent". "Intergenerational parenting" is a common phenomenon in life, and it is also a normal psychological phenomenon, why is this? Let's take a look.

First of all, why is this a normal psychological phenomenon? Because when they are young, even if they have children, in order to earn money and live, they are tired of work, and they must not have the energy and time to take care of their children, so they will have a certain sense of guilt for their children. When the children grow up and start a family, the "burden" on their bodies is lighter, they are getting older with more time, and the children already have their own small families, and they no longer need the care and care of their parents.

Therefore, they will transfer all the debts owed to their children to compensate their grandchildren, and they will try their best to meet the needs of their little grandchildren, and they will feel happy when their grandchildren are happy. For example, a recent touching short film about an old man who stayed in the mountains, when the Spring Festival was approaching, looking forward to reuniting with his son's family, holding an old mobile phone to his grandson **, asking his grandson what kind of New Year's gift he wanted, and the grandson said casually: Page, let the old man embark on a journey to find "Page".

Because the place where the left-behind old man lived was backward, he didn't know what his grandson's mouth was Peppa, so he asked "what is Peppa", and later someone told him that Peppa was a pig, red, he looked at the domestic pigs, there were white and black flowers, but they were not red, and he wanted to paint the pig red with red paint, of course, it didn't work. Eventually, he created a "Peppa" and brought it to his grandson as a gift. I feel the deepest touching is the bitterness of grandpa looking for "Peppa" for his grandson, I have read such a sentence, I don't know anything about what you like, but because you like it, I will give it to you all over the world.

This is a typical interpretation of "intergenerational parenting".

I believe that everyone will also find at home that the intergenerational relationship is indeed very obvious. Personally, I have also experienced intergenerational parenting, that is, my grandmother loves herself very much. No matter what kind of excessive demands she makes, grandma will often agree, and many people feel very incomprehensible to such a question.

Especially uncles, they will feel that blindly spoiling will only make them feel pampered and proud. From my personal point of view, I do feel very happy. Because my grandmother spoils herself very much, then I will feel very happy, as if I have done something and been recognized, and I will have a great sense of achievement.

Grandma loves herself very much.

Children who are loved will always be very confident, and the confidence in their hearts is also very sufficient, this sentence is really very true. And when it happens to you, you will feel that if someone really loves you, then no matter what you do, you will feel that there is a force behind you. If a person is always insecure, or no one makes them feel cared for, then it is very likely that they will feel very inferior when doing things, and at this time, it will also affect some of their actions.

I feel very happy.

So this kind of love, although it is said to be doting, can indeed push us forward. And the intergenerational relatives are indeed much more loving than the parents, because the intergenerational relatives usually respond to their needs. For parents, they will definitely want their children to grow up to be physically and mentally healthy, and for some unscientific or unreasonable requests of their children, parents will refuse at once.

But for the relatives of the next generation, they will not. No matter what kind of request they make, they will do their best to meet it, because they will feel that they are a generation apart, and it is indeed very kind.

Since ancient times, there has been a saying in China that "intergenerational relatives", that is, children will feel that their grandfather, grandmother, grandfather, and grandmother love them more than their parents.

Especially in modern society, young parents are forced to work hard outside the home due to the pressure of all aspects of life, and the responsibility of taking care of their children naturally falls on the shoulders of their grandparents. This has also created the phenomenon of intergenerational relatives becoming more close.

Today's topic is: how close can the "next generation" be?

Let's take a look at what netizens have to say:

Netizen 1: I have already thought about it, my two houses are directly transferred to my grandson, my son and daughter-in-law have no share, and my son is 14 years old this year!

Netizen 2: Going to the funeral, it's a matter of one or two hours. The baby is only ten months old, and he is generally reluctant to let such a young child go.

The husband said to the mother-in-law: Don't go to the child, you can help take it for a while! My mother-in-law immediately went into the room and took a talisman and came out and said:

You can go with this. Speechless!

Netizen 3: Since I had a daughter, my mother has disliked me, and now Yuncha is buried in Erbao, I have no way to live, every day ** said that I should not point the camera at myself, she wants to see the child.

Netizen 4: This kind of next-generation pro-generation is simply unreasonable and unreasonable! Grandpa Wa was very strict with my husband's side of the ants, and he didn't beat him less when he was a child!

Yesterday, I went to pick up the baby, and I saw my daughter let her grandmother hold her grandfather's bald head, laughing and quacking. I looked at her and slapped her daughter on the hand, making her cry. Her grandparents yelled at me

The baby is playing crazy with us, what are you doing beating her! Look at the child who beats him....

Netizen 5: The two sons are 7 years old and 6 years old, my father bought a house in Yinchuan for each person and spent more than 1 million, and bought a new house in his hometown village for more than 300,000 yuan.

There are many similar cases of intergenerational parenting around us. Because the grandparents are more fond of grandchildren, because of the age, they especially like children, the previous people said "the next generation, connected tendons", although the grandparents and grandchildren are separated by a generation of blood relations, but this does not prevent the intimate relationship between grandparents and grandchildren.

Many families will have a similar situation, but the degree of intimacy is different, so let's talk about the intergenerational relatives you have seen, can there be more relatives in the next generation?

The first thing: the grandparents at home love their grandchildren very much, sometimes children do wrong things, as parents we must educate them well. As a result, we didn't say a word, and the grandparents stood up to defend the child first, saying what "the child is still young, you have to teach it slowly, what is it that you beat the child" Yunyun, who originally wanted to educate the child, but he didn't expect to be educated first.

The second thing: Some grandparents love their grandchildren, they do their best to meet their grandchildren's requirements, as long as the children want, they will find a way to get them out. Especially when it comes to spending money on children, you may spend a few hundred yuan, but you can spend thousands or even tens of thousands of dollars on your grandchildren.

The third thing: intergenerational parenting is not only reflected in the grandparents to the children, we can also see the "difference between the two generations" in the children. The child is very well-behaved in front of his grandparents, and his filial appearance is touching, and when he arrives at his parents, he is all kinds of rebellious and naughty, obviously the little padded jacket of his parents, but now he has warmed the knees of his grandparents.

The so-called intergenerational parents are not unreasonable, in many families, some children get along well with their grandparents, and some are estranged from each other, in the final analysis, the emergence of intergenerational parents lies in the two-way emotional feedback between children and their grandparents. A child's mind is very simple, and whoever is good to him at home, he is more willing to be close to whom. Grandparents are very fond of their grandchildren, and grandchildren will always stick to their grandparents.