Write a poem and give your opinions!

The deceased meet online, and the deceased is: an old friend or a deceased person.

I hope friendship will go with you, hopefully: derogatory terms, a sense of loss.

It's a pity that the affection has long gone, and I still suffer with me.

Although the artistic conception is good, the rhyme is slightly lacking, and the rhythm of poetry is lost. There are a lot of heavy words! In the next small test, make a slight change, please forgive me for not being thoughtful.

Friends meet in the network, I wish friendship to be close to each other for a long time, but unfortunately the old fate is gone with the wind, and my heart is still obsessed with grief.

The snow is hazy, and the moon is warm and the ivy is hidden.

Dust and smoke are drunk and waiting, and I only wish that Ling Hua is better than purple red.

Jun is devoted to this poem, and this should be a limerick poem. At the end, the word is wrong, and it is one to persuade you to study diligently.

The snow is hazy, the snow is half-clear, and the moon is warm and the ivy is hidden. The shy moon hides the spring and shines on the green vine.

The dust and smoke are drunk and waiting, and the infatuation is waiting for the moon, and I only wish that Linghua will become a ivy. I only wish that Ling Hua would fall into his arms.

The snow is hazy, and the moon is warm and the ivy is hidden.

Dust and smoke are drunk and waiting, and I only wish that Ling Hua will become a ivy.

Yes, but how does the snow appear at the same time as the moon? How can the moon be "warm"?

Two ivies have a repetitive feel to read, so it's best to swap out one of them.

The same two Linghua repetitions seem to pursue repetitive artistic techniques, but in fact, the dog's tail continues to mink.

It was suggested that the fourth sentence should be changed completely.

Here are two most basic questions for you:

First, there are too many problems;

Second, in terms of rhyme, it is a mistake!

Advise!!! Don't say you're writing poetry!

The Milky Way took off and flew snow and Yu Linghua, I don't understand this.

It's sprayed, and it's written very funny hehe. Let me give you some advice.

One, don't write too bluntly, the poem is precious and subtle, and in addition, your words are too poor and not very vivid. You can read more poetry collections, Tang poems and Song lyrics.

Second, the intention should be profound. That is, the feelings and views expressed in the poem should be novel and stand up to scrutiny. Like the first song, it is simply narrated, and the feelings are not reflected.

Third, add some scenery descriptions appropriately. It can reflect thoughts and feelings to a certain extent.

You should be imitating Li Bai's poems, right? Poetry is limerick poetry, in general, it is to add some poetry skills and the like, I suggest you look at An Yiru's life if you only meet for the first time, I like it. Keep up the good work, huh.

Bonus points please.

1.In winter, a flock of geese welcome spring, and in the middle of spring, they are still more sorrowful. In the first sentence, geese generally fly to the south in autumn, so the scene of "a flock of geese in winter" in the poem cannot be seen.

I don't know what the author wants to convey in the second sentence, "more sorrowful", but I think it might be better to change it to "more sorrowful". 2.Jaw joint, neck couplet, tail couplet.

Except for the jaw couplet "Broken Branches and Yellow Leaves" with autumn meaning, the rest are not linked to the title "Autumn Thoughts". 3.Although the meaning of writing poetry comes first, the premise is that the meaning you want to express is good enough.

In this poem, the author probably wants to express his longing for his old friend or lament loneliness, but he doesn't have the right words. There is no rhyme, and there is no attention to the flatness.

First: dare to try, be able to persist in writing, and improve step by step;

Third: when creating, it is necessary to rely on a certain environment, preferably quiet and beautiful. In this environment, you can give full play to your imagination and be able to gallop in the thinking space without distractions, so that you can have inspiration and emotion;

Fourth: creation should be down-to-earth, can be better than life and higher than life, the most important thing in poetry is the display or expression of emotion, language is at most an indispensable shell, so the emphasis is on the tempering of emotions.

1.Read good poems, read famous poems, and draw nourishment from them.

2.Practice the pen diligently, do more hands, and get tempered from it.

3.Communicate more, observe carefully, and grasp the material from it.

Poetry is emotional, emotional and good poetry. Emphasis on simplicity means conciseness. Spread the rhyme between each sentence so that it is catchy. The appearance of the word "abstinence". Pay attention to this, and you will be able to write good poetry.

Read the poem first, and you'll be able to read almost everything, and you'll be there.

Sincere, not pretentious; Concise, no redundancy; Watch more, practice more.

The poems are well written. Intentionally. But there is a little less flavor. (lz don't shoot me) suggests that there are a few things that can be changed:

Meet and then separate.

Germination, is it the story of (flowers) or the love of branches (flowers have more taste of love).

Dewdrops, is it the washing of the heart or the crying (in the morning) (The leaf word feels a little repetitive.) Dew drops are only available in the morning, so to speak, early morning tears).

Autumn frost is the indifference of the season or the (warm) (departure) (warm is used as a noun here.) It just matches the feeling that summer is passing and autumn is coming. You can change it to something else).

Falling leaves, is it the call of the wind or the abandonment of the tree.

What is it that allows us to meet, meet and separate.

What is it, that surprises, surprises and cries.

What is it that makes us love each other, love each other and give up.

What is it that makes us (sad) and (sad) comforted.

I always have to know my weakness and powerlessness when I have to wait for the end (use one word or use different words in three sentences.) more neat)

I always have to wait until I am separated to know that I can't control the outcome.

You always have to wait until you wake up to know that you need to start and give up.

Jealousy is like hatred of the people, and the righteous men of the three Koreas are the sun and the moon.

Hirobumi Ito Matsue was killed, and General Shirakawa was killed in Hongqiao.

So far, I miss An Chonggen, and I will die generously and never escape!

After Ahn Chong-geun assassinated the Japanese chief Ito Hirobumi who had destroyed Korea at the Harbin railway station, he raised his arms and shouted, 'Korea has won!' Refusing to run away, sacrificing one's life for righteousness

Short clothes and long skirts danced, and the sound of long drums and Gayageum was far away.

Confucianism is revered, the people are elegant, hard-working, and not afraid of difficulties.

Very well written, concise sentences, very poetic.

Recommendations:1Replace "autumn frost, is it the indifference of the season or the coolness of the leaves" to "autumn frost, is it the indifference of autumn or the coolness of frost".

Because, the semantics of "season" as a separate "word" are unclear, and the second is the repetition of "leaf" and the previous sentence. 2.Change "always wait until you wake up to know that you need to start and give up" to "always wait until you wake up to know that what you lose is sweet".

Judging from the whole poem, what you are expressing is the thoughts after separation. In order to stick to the poetry, explain what was "realized". Emphasizing the "sweetness" of "encounter", the "bitterness" of separation, and the "inevitability" of "longing".