After a few years in society, I always feel that I am not as tactful as others, how can I change mys

How to quickly change your way of thinking and living habits?

The first step is to find out what you want to change, such as habits that you get frustrated easily, feel frustrated, or go to extremes, etc. Find out here, it is not a matter of taking it for granted in the ordinary surface consciousness, but to go deep behind the idea, not to be deceived by the surface phenomenon, for example, someone does not like to talk, as soon as he speaks, he is nervous, on the surface, it seems that this person is introverted and does not like to talk, but the real situation is not like this, because he is in front of his relatives or acquaintances, it may be another performance, he may become enthusiastic and outgoing, love to talk, so, we must accurately find out the part of ourselves that we want to change, Under what circumstances would this be the case?

The second step is to find out what you want to change, and find out the corresponding result after the change, or the above example, don't like to talk, introverted, so what do we want to look like after the change? It is to be able to calmly and calmly stand on one's true thoughts and express oneself. This is the desired result of the change, which is often called the goal, and the change without the goal will not work.

The third step is the brain's subconscious pursuit of happiness and avoidance of pain, that is, if a way of thinking or living habits will make you feel pain, then the subconscious will automatically avoid it, which is what psychology calls phobia.

If a lifestyle or way of thinking makes the brain feel happy and happy, then the brain will be happy to repeat the habit over and over again.

The method of change is the method of the 30 days of potential explosion that I found in the spring, which is to associate the habits you want to change with great suffering, and the habits you want to have with great happiness.

Let me give you an example of how I changed my own habit of laziness, I linked laziness with the despisation of poverty in five years, and the despisation of poverty in ten years, and by analogy, the more detailed and specific the imagination, the greater the superimposed pain, and in the end, as soon as the idea of doing it again tomorrow and taking a break appeared in my mind, the great pain naturally appeared, and inspired me to continue working and studying.

Then, associating the part of wanting to have with great happiness is about the same as associating pain, and the more you add it step by step, the more positive the brain will react to when you take action. The whole step of change, which is about that, is very effective and can change a person's habitual personality in a few days.

The ability to express is limited, if you really still can't figure it out, go to the whole set of pirated ones, learn it, the official ones are too expensive.

It is enough to learn some things about etiquette and eloquence. It's more important to keep to yourself. No one hits someone who likes to be slick at heart.

You have to learn the way people do things.

Talk less and listen more, and learn more from the good people around you. But don't learn from people to play tricks, it will be more pleasing to be kind.

I think that "sleekness" is to turn your brain quickly, to think more about what others need, and then to compliment people.

Yes, society will really make people smooth, because there are all kinds of people in society, especially after participating in the work, after experiencing some people and some things, you have to become smooth, which should be called eating a trench and growing wise.

Yes. How much will become sleek. It just depends on whether the attitude towards you is tactful or sincere.

Because you can't get along in society if you don't be tactful. And sleekness is actually not a bad thing, just the right sleekness, sleekness that does not harm others and self-interest can also be understood as high emotional intelligence, don't be afraid.

This is based on your personality and nature, and some of them can't be learned. But it's also good. Whether it is sleek and clever, everyone has their own blessings. Follow your heart, don't think about how to play tricks on people and how to hurt people.

It's just fine, it's honed.

Society is everyone's living environment, and the relationship between people and the environment is nothing more than three kinds: one is to change the environment; the second is to adapt to the environment; The third is to escape from the environment.

Obviously, the first is difficult and impossible for everyone; The third option is not advisable, unless you escape the world and live in seclusion in the mountains and forests, which is also unrealistic. Then there is only the second one, where you change yourself to adapt to the environment.

Therefore, it is not the society that makes people smooth, but the people who slowly adapt to this society in order to survive and develop!

While adapting to society, you can still maintain your true nature! Such as frankness, kindness, sincerity, and so on!