How to avoid the disadvantages of intergenerational parenting?

It was agreed with the elderly that the parents were only responsible for the pick-up and drop-off and meals, and the discipline was the parents' business. Disadvantages are unavoidable, as long as you don't have intergenerational upbringing. Although I am tired, my children's temperament and habits are better.

It's simple, reduce the amount of time spent in intergenerational parenting as much as possible. Go home early from work and take care of the children by yourself.

It is best to strengthen communication and achieve the consistency of the educational philosophy of the two generations, and there is a need to open the eyes of the older generation, and many things are better than seeing them.

Unless you don't let your mother-in-law bring it. And live far away and have little contact. Otherwise, it can't be avoided.

To avoid the shortcomings of "intergenerational parenting", we must first avoid multi-headed management, parents should maintain good communication and unity of principles, and grandparents should only help and assist.

It is enough not to "educate from one generation to the next". Generational parenting can create character flaws in children, and the best way is not to let them happen.

Bring your own kindergarten to find a babysitter. Otherwise, it can only be brought by the elderly. In fact, if the relationship between the two generations is close and the concept is similar, it is really a blessing to have the help of the elderly, and the children also have the opportunity to absorb the advantages of their parents and grandparents.

If not, estimate the amount of your purse, choose the most acceptable one among several choices, and take responsibility and consequences for yourself.

All the elders around him have a common character, that is, no matter how strict they are when they are parents, they spoil their grandchildren to the sky when they become grandparents and grandparents. So really, if you have the conditions to bring it yourself, try to bring it yourself, education can keep up with the times, and you can also kiss a little.

Introduction: If you want to avoid the shortcomings of intergenerational education, then you need parents to be dominant, parents can use other time to stay with their children, provide children with high-quality companionship, understand children's needs, and guide children's growth, because children for the elderly, their knowledge will be broader, and they can also educate children more scientifically, help children develop good behavior habits, and can also avoid children being raised as bear children. Parents must do a good job of communication, especially between parents and elders in advance, otherwise there will always be some problems in education, then children do not know who to listen to, and it is easy to have cognitive biases.

Therefore, parents and elders must unite the good front, so as to be able to correctly guide children and let them grow up healthily.

Many elderly people have entered the time of their old age and have enough time and energy. Compared to parents who are busy with life and career, grandparents can educate their babies more carefully, are more willing to spend time on parenting, listen patiently to their baby's complaints, and take care of their baby more carefully. Mom and dad in a modern family are in the stage of career accumulation.

At this time, having grandparents to help take care of the children really helped parents relieve a lot of worries. You can put more energy into your work and create a better environment for your children. The people of the ancestral era have maintained the excellent qualities of diligence, simplicity, frugality, honesty, and filial piety, which are mostly lacking in modern society.

In the process of baby education, these good qualities of grandparents will imperceptibly affect the baby.

The concept of parenting of the elderly is resistant to the influence of the past era, and it is difficult to accept new parenting concepts and methods. However, the original intention was for the good of grandchildren, and this mood is understandable. Some elderly people do not like to talk, which will cause children to lack the language environment in the process of language development, so that language development will lag behind.

Bad character in older people can affect children. For example, some elderly people are very anxious and often worry that their children will be in danger, or they will get sick when they encounter dirty things, so as to prevent their children from doing such and such things, which is not good for their children's growth.

Finally, parents should know that they should not leave all the things with their children to the elderly, after all, taking care of children is a very physically demanding thing, and children also need to communicate with their parents for a long time.

Parents should accompany their children so that they can observe their children's shortcomings in time and correct them in time to avoid serious impacts.

Parents can take care of their children themselves, so that there will be no problems caused by intergenerational parenting.

When raising children from one generation to the next, they should follow their children to play, try not to let their elders use spoken language, and teach their children to read.

Parents and grandparents should communicate with each other and with their children.

"Generation-skipping" has three advantages: First, it is beneficial to the development and growth of grandchildren. Many prodigies "stand out only because they have received the guidance of their knowledgeable and experienced ancestors."

Second, it is beneficial to the children. The children are busy with work, and the children are raised by their grandparents, so they can relieve their worries and concentrate on their careers. Third, it is beneficial to the ancestors.

Not only can Hulu relieve loneliness and gain vitality from the growth of children, but it can also do something for the elderly and exert residual heat. This kind of family fun of playing games with grandchildren can go a long way in helping the elderly maintain a healthy mindset. However, although there are many advantages of "intergenerational parenting", it also brings many hidden dangers that are not conducive to children's health and success.

prolonging the period of childish psychology". The ups and downs of some grandparents' lives doomed them to a preference for grandchildren, which was largely doting. Loving too much will hinder the normal psychological development of children.

As a result of pampering, children are always unable to get rid of the constraints of childish psychology". Agencies compare the psychology of children who come out of nursery schools with those brought up by grandparents and find that they are very different. Children who come out of the nursery school have a strong sense of community, strong adaptability, and a large social circle, can do many things by themselves, are bold, can endure hardships, and generally wrestling, slippery and bruising are like nothing, and can cross the road at a very young age.

This is not the case for children who are brought up by grandparents or maternal grandparents, and some of them have to be picked up by the elderly in the fifth grade of primary school, and they can't do anything, and they don't want to do things like carrying school bags. When encountering problems, I cry when I am not satisfied, I am coquettish, lack of adaptability, and I am not social.

leads to the disintegration of education". The worldview of our ancestors was formed decades ago, and many of them still have a level of understanding of objective things that existed decades ago. In the intimate contact with grandchildren, their view of the world will be inadvertently transmitted from generation to generation, which will make it more difficult for children to accept new knowledge and new things.

In addition, the ideology of the elderly is relatively outdated and relatively stubborn, and the imprint on the grandchildren will have a negative effect on the children's acceptance of new knowledge and experience. On the other hand, some elderly people have physiological decline, inconvenient legs and feet, like to be quiet and lazy, and often can only be confined to the family with children, and the children brought out are easy to grow old and not lively, which hinders the intellectual development of children.

The biggest drawback is doting, grandparents are more fond of their grandchildren, plus there are not many children now, they are more pampered, as the so-called holding in the hand is afraid of flying, holding it in the mouth for fear of melting, everything satisfies the child (whether it is good or bad for the child), so it will have a great negative impact on the growth of the child; In addition, if the grandparents are older or have a hobby such as playing cards, the safety of the child is also a very important issue.

Parents should take time to take care of their children as much as possible, if they really don't have time, then they have to tell grandparents what to do, and ask them not to spoil their children too much, although it is said that educating children should be based on encouragement, but it does not mean that everything is in accordance with the child's wishes, grandparents should know how to do things for the good of the child, even so parents should often call home to ask about the child's situation; When it comes to the safety of children, it is also a very important issue, and grandparents must pay special attention to it.

1. The reduction of parent-child communication is not conducive to the healthy growth of children.

2.Educational philosophies conflict, so that children are at a loss.

3. Most of the elderly are doting, developing various bad living habits, and doing everything instead, so that children lack the ability to take care of themselves.

4. The elderly generally like to be quiet, children are curious and active by nature, and long-term being around the elderly is not conducive to the growth of children.

Therefore, it is not advisable to leave children in the care of elders for a long time. Be sure to have more contact with your child and communicate more.

With the development of the times, some young parents are either busy with their own work, or because of divorce and put all the responsibilities of their children's education and life to grandparents, grandmothers, grandparents, and grandmothers, and these grandparents have consciously become "modern parents" who take care of the third generation in an all-round way. Agree with intergenerational education, but parents cannot completely hand over the right to education and custody of their children to their grandparents.

Favorable factors: If grandparents can have a certain scientific knowledge of modern family education, grandparents also have certain advantages in bringing their children. Advantage 1:

Many grandparents have plenty of time and energy, and are willing to spend time with their children. They not only take care of the child's life, provide the conditions for learning, give appropriate guidance, but are also able to patiently listen to the child's narrative. Generally speaking, it is easy to establish a harmonious and harmonious relationship between grandparents and grandchildren.

Advantage 2: Grandparents have practical experience in raising and educating children, and they know much more than their children's parents about what problems are prone to occur at different ages and how to deal with them.

Advantage 3: The rich social experience and life perception accumulated by grandparents in long-term social practice are favorable conditions for promoting children's development and effectively dealing with children's education problems.

Advantage 4: Grandparents have a childlike heart, and it is easy to establish a harmonious relationship with their grandchildren, which creates a good emotional foundation for educating their children and is conducive to the physical and mental health of grandchildren.

Disadvantages: Factor 1: It is easy to form doting.

Most grandparents often have the idea that they did not take good care of their children due to the living and working conditions of their youth, and compensated more love to their grandchildren. This kind of thinking often leads to the phenomenon of "generational habit". Grandparents love their grandchildren too much and accommodate their children everywhere, which can easily cause children to be willful, dependent and have low self-care ability.

There are also some grandparents who "protect their shortcomings" because they love their children too much, resulting in their children's weaknesses not being corrected for a long time.

Factor 2: Outdated ideology.

Regardless of the great changes that have taken place in the times, many grandparents still demand their children with old views, teach their children too much old experience, and lack the cultivation of pioneering spirit and divergent thinking. There are also some grandparents who unconsciously teach their children a lot of feudal superstitions because of their low education and old thinking, which invisibly increases the difficulty for their children to accept new ideas and new knowledge.

Factor 3: Causing emotional estrangement between children and their parents.

The spoiling and protection of grandchildren by grandparents makes it difficult for children to accept the strict demands and criticisms of their parents, and it is easy to form emotional estrangement and emotional antagonism, making it difficult to carry out normal and necessary education.

Factor 4: Generation-skipping education has a great impact on children's personality development.

Advice: Young parents should also find time to spend with their children, no matter how busy they are. It is irresponsible for children to completely hand over their children's education and custody rights to their grandparents.

There are pros and cons to intergenerational education.

Cons: 1Grandparents doted on their children and were overprotective 2

Parents' and grandparents' educational concepts are inconsistent 3For the education of the fathers, the grandparents do not cooperate 4Grandparents do not feed scientifically 5

The education of the elderly is more conservative (grandparents interfere with the education of their parents) 6There is a discrepancy in communication between parents and grandparents in front of their children. "

Pros: 1Plenty of time 2

The old man is more attentive 3Educational experience 4Be close to your child 5

Solve the worries of the parents 6Closer to life 7Enriching the lives of the elderly 8

Inheritance of culture 9Be a comfort to your child 10Make up for the lack of affection in children 11

The stress of life in the elderly is reduced by 12Ask for a low 13 for your childIntegrating Family Relationships 14

It can ensure the child's work and rest time"