My boyfriend is unhappy at work, and now he ignores me

It's really easy to start a relationship, but it's hard to maintain it well, sister, you have to know that a man sometimes deliberately avoids certain things, not that he hasn't thought about it, but that he has no clue, although he is immediately facing the pressure of taking the civil service exam, and there is no job for three months, so he is also uncomfortable now, so as an outsider, I can still see the relationship and contradictions between you, 1. The loss of his first job, with his academic qualifications, It's not difficult to find a job, but it's not easy to find a job that allows you to play, three months without a job, it doesn't mean that he is incapable of working, you have to believe in him, give him confidence, tell him that he can do it!

Second, I haven't heard his laughter for a long time, out of a man's self-esteem, he feels that he can't give you satisfaction now, it may make you can't raise your head in front of others, don't think it won't be like this, in fact, the man's self-esteem is very strong, you can also tell him, rest well, the rest now is just for a longer road in the future! Doing more exercise with him and increasing the interaction between you will make him more cheerful!!

3. The matter of taking the civil service exam, in fact, you must know that he must have been nervous about you in his heart, but he didn't show it, his pressure is really great, and now he may really be watching TV and surfing the Internet, but his heart must be uncomfortable, at this time, you might as well give him more space, I believe he will be able to do it! Your urging not only does not give him confidence, but may also make him feel more depressed, the pressure he is facing is already great enough, and you are about to go abroad, and it will be very sad to lose you by your side! So, please don't increase his pressure now, hang out with him more, and tell him that even if he can't pass the civil service exam, it's not a big deal, that will stimulate his fighting spirit!

Fourth, now he has become inferior, it is because he is unsuccessful in his work, and you are about to go abroad, out of worry, I am still afraid that you will change your mind! If you can, you give him a promise, although the promise should not be said easily, but it is still easier to go abroad to make the relationship fade!

Give him more encouragement now, don't push him too hard, that will only backfire, but will dilute the relationship and interaction between you, so you should accompany him out more sports now, go for a walk in the park, and breathe more fresh air!

Now the only thing you can do is to relax him, so that his nerves are not too tense, and I believe that with you by his side, he will also be happy!!

Anyway, I hope you can be happy forever!!

His first job was good, but for some reason he left the company. After that, I looked for a job for 3 months, but luck never came, and I still haven't found a job.

He was hit a lot, he was in a bad mood, and it was hard to hear him laughing, for more than a month, I took the initiative to find him, and he never took the initiative to find me. I asked him if he didn't want me anymore, and he said I was thinking nonsense. We had an argument two weeks ago, and when it was over, I asked him if he was annoying me, and he said he was annoying himself.

In the past few days, he is going to take the civil service exam, I send a text message to ask what he is doing, he is either watching TV or surfing the Internet, I see that he is depressed, so I urge him to read, but after saying a few times, he is annoyed by me.

We both graduated from undergraduate studies this year, and I was going abroad for graduate school in two months, and he chose to look for a job. In the past, he was very confident and a little arrogant, because he was a prestigious university and I was a second book, and he was very good to me at that time. And now I feel that he is a little inferior in front of me, and I feel more and more distant from him, and I feel very sad to see him like this.

I'm so worried and upset right now, I don't know what I'm going to do. I hope you can help me and help me through this hurdle.

Question add: His family conditions are not very good, so it is impossible to go abroad with me.

This requires a transition. You should always encourage him!

Ignoring you may be his inferiority. Be tolerant!

Think about it from another perspective, if you were faced with this situation, how would you deal with it?

You should understand him, give him a chance, time, care more about him, I understand him very well, his family conditions are average, you want to go abroad, the family should be fine, which boy wants to have a successful career, take good care of the person he loves, I think it's normal to encounter a little setback.

Concentrate on the graduate school entrance examination, and come back to him after the exam, I believe that if he really likes you, he will definitely wait for you!

Let him accompany you on a trip abroad, if possible!

You still care more about him, but don't put pressure on him, he is now under enough pressure to pull, work pressure, and you are going abroad, at this time silently by his side is to give him the best support, don't talk to him about the future of work, he will have his own plans, believe in him, encourage him, give him confidence is what he needs most now.

This man is really emotional.

If you can't find a job, you ignore people.

Let him go abroad to accompany him, and it is safer to be together.

Ignore you when you're unhappy, do you think this kind of man is useful?

The methods of comforting your boyfriend for not going well at work are as follows:

1. Words of comfort should be "pure enough". When a man is not working well, it is inevitable that he will feel anxious as a wife. Many times, when wives are comforting their husbands, they will unconsciously "vent" these anxieties.

There are also wives who will "preach" to their husbands while "comforting" him, telling him what to do.

The result of such "comfort" is that the wife speaks comforting words, but the husband receives anxiety and blame. Not only did it not have a comforting effect, but it also made her husband's mood worse.

The best way to say comforting words well is to be "pure", to express your concern and understanding for your husband purely without any emotions.

2. "Inconsolation" is also a kind of consolation. When a man is not working well, his mood will also be affected. As a wife, if you don't take into account his feelings and blindly engage in chatter to "comfort", it will only make the other person more irritable.

The best thing to do is to be improvised. If your husband is willing to share with you and complain to you, then as a wife, you naturally need to comfort more. However, when many husbands encounter difficulties, they like to face and think alone, at this time, there is no need to "draw a snake" to comfort, do not say or ask, silent support is the greatest comfort.

3. The comfort under empathy is more powerful. When we educate our children, we often mention the word "empathy". The so-called "empathy" refers to the ability to enter the spiritual world of the other party, feel his inner world, and "share" the feelings of the other party when interacting with others.

To put it bluntly, it is to put yourself in the other party's position and feel the other party's emotions, when a man is not working well, if the wife can "empathize" with him, then everything she says and does is the best comfort for the man.

To comfort a man who is not going well at work and is stressed, he should: care about him more than usual, care about him more than usual, do not add fuel to the fire, give the man confidence, and give him the space to calm down appropriately.

1. Give him a smile of trust.

Many women, when men encounter career bottlenecks, many will scold men, and even say that men are useless, which hurts men's self-esteem.

Let the man's heart be indifferent, so as wives, we must not let the man's self-esteem be hurt a second time, we must give the man a warm smile, give him a hug of trust, we choose this man, we must support him, give him trust.

2. Care about him more than usual.

When a man is frustrated, he is very sensitive and vulnerable, and people who have a little bit of wind and grass think that we are insinuating that it is useless to scold him, so at this time we must give him more care, take care of his daily life more carefully, let him feel your intentions, your understanding, and make him feel better.

3. Don't add fuel to the fire.

Career failure is originally a person's lowest mood, if you complain and get angry, it is easy to make a man's spirit impacted. Usually try not to nag in front of a man, annoy him, don't taunt him coldly, and create a good family atmosphere for him.

4. Give men confidence.

Although the career is not going well, but what does it matter, who can guarantee that there will be no setbacks in the future, so we have to tell the man: "The career is not going well, it's not a big deal, as long as we have confidence, we can start all over again, our man is such a smart and powerful person, it must be okay, we must fully support it." "It makes a man feel heartwarmed and increases his confidence, and it's just a big deal to start all over again.

5. Give him the space to calm down.

A man who has a bad career will naturally be in a low mood, sometimes he needs to calm down and clean up his mood, and many men don't like their other half to see their vulnerable side. So we can give the man the right space to calm down and think about the lessons of career failure.

Summary. Hello dear, when your boyfriend is not going well at work and wants to comfort him better, you can also try to divert his attention, which is a good way. When he doesn't have a good time at work, you can have a drink with him, or go on a bike ride with him, go for a walk, and do something that makes him seem happier, so that you can temporarily distract from his troubles.

Maybe you can also go to the movies together, have a new date, and let him relive the sweetness of your relationship, which is also a good choice.

Hello dear, when your boyfriend is not going well at work and wants to comfort him better, you can also try to divert his attention, which is a good way. When he doesn't have a good time at work, you can have a drink with him, or go on a bike ride with him, go for a walk, and do something that makes him seem happier, so that you can temporarily distract from his troubles. Maybe you can also go to the movies together, have a new date, and let him relive the sweetness of your relationship, which is also a good choice.

The specific analysis is as follows: 1. Understand why your boyfriend is in a bad mood. If he is willing to say why he is in a bad mood, listen carefully to what he has to say.

If he doesn't want to speak, say words of comfort to show that you care. Then, according to his reaction, choose to accompany him or let him be alone and quiet. 2. If your boyfriend is in a bad mood because of unsatisfactory work, then you can tell him about mistakes or other problems at work, which will indeed make people feel uncomfortable.

But as long as you take this kind of discomfort as a problem that may arise from cyclicality, and resist these pressures, you will be fine, and you may be able to grow. 3. If your boyfriend fails to apply for a job, you can tell him that we can take our time and then go to other places to apply, maybe this is not the most suitable for us, and we can have a better platform for development. 4. When your boyfriend feels that he is unproductive and looks down on himself too much, give him encouragement and tell him that in fact, everyone has their own advantages and disadvantages, so we must avoid our own shortcomings, give full play to our own advantages, maximize our interests, don't be overly inferior, and know how to be grateful, so that we will be happier.

In short, comforting your boyfriend requires the right medicine to "cure the disease".

1. This is also a manifestation of his love for you. It is impossible for two people to be together with all the beats, and most men will take it to heart when they are unhappy, because he thinks that it is useless to tell you, for fear of increasing your troubles. If he wants to be quiet, you give him a space and be a listener when he wants to talk to you.

I can understand that you love him and care about his feelings, but don't let this lead you up and add to your worries, that's not what he wants to see. My boyfriend once said to me, "If a man tells a woman everything, does he still have an ego?"

That's the difference between men and women.

2. This situation is very common, many of them will have such a situation, he ignores you and don't pay attention to it, if he is a self-regulating situation, he doesn't want to tell you unhappy things, and when he is in a good mood, he will talk and laugh with you, don't worry, let it be. Let's relax.

3, this may be his personality reasons, the two are together to trust each other and understand each other, just get used to it, you don't have to worry, you can communicate with him when he is in a good mood.

4. You think you should relax your mood, the boy has a lot of self-esteem in front of his girlfriend, he may be in a bad mood because he has a bad solution, or difficult to extricate himself, at this time your concern may make him annoyed, because he may want to quietly solve his problems alone, and your deliberate concern may infringe on his carefully maintained self-esteem or face, don't they all say that men love face? Encourage him quietly :) Gentle praise will dissolve the gap in your hearts, and understand him, because he is born with this kind of personality that cannot be changed at once.