When children are reluctant to communicate with their parents, is there a problem with their parents

Nowadays, many children are reluctant to communicate with their parents, because they lack companionship, and then there may not be a lot of common language, which will cause some generation gap problems with their parents, so when parents want to understand them in depth, they are reluctant to show their hearts to their parents, so when they encounter some things, they may have some contradictions, because there is no good communication and exchange, resulting in more and more contradictions. The relationship between them will also become more and more rusty, because some children are <> when they need their parents to accompany them, when they need their parents' help

Parents are not around, so they learn to be independent very early, learn to do a lot of things alone, they gradually become mature, so when parents want to communicate with them, they will have a more resistant psychology, in fact, for parents, they should balance work, as well as time with children, maybe you want to give children a good education and a good life, but it is also very important to accompany children, because in their childhood, you can't do without you, You should better teach them in life to face some difficulties, some setbacks, teach them how to behave, how to do things, these are what parents should do, in fact, parents' behavior, parents' role models are also many, because many children will be affected by one of your actions, <>

So for children, the education of parents, the company of parents is very important, so when children need you, you should try your best to help them, comfort them, because they feel that you are their safe haven, when they are hurt, they can talk to you, in fact, whether it is children or parents, when there is a lack of communication with parents or lack of communication with children, <>

Because that's your parents, they may want to make your life better and ignore what they feel is most important, so learn to cherish the people and things around you

Yes, it may be that parents are too strict in education, never think about their own children, and always impose their own ideas on their own children.

Yes, at least parents do not accompany their children, rarely communicate with their children, so they can't go into their hearts, no matter what they do right or wrong, they can't get a response from their parents, so they don't want to communicate with their parents.

Yes, parents do not have enough self-confidence in their children, so that children are afraid of making their parents angry, parents must learn to be calm.

Not necessarily, it may be that the child has reached puberty, and this reluctance to communicate with parents may be caused by physiological factors.

Yes, it is the parents who do not guide them well, or who are always harsh when they speak to their children, that can lead to children being like this.

It is not the responsibility of parental education, but there must be some problems in parental education.

Yes. If the parents' education is correct, the child is generally close to the parents and is willing to communicate with the parents.

Why children are reluctant to communicate with their parents.

Why children are reluctant to communicate with their parents. Parents should examine themselves with a critical mindset to see if there is anything that makes children afraid and frightened in their daily life, such as tone, attitude, expression, etc. Did you not listen carefully when your child told you something?

Did you once tell your child what was in your heart to you, and you told it to others as a joke or took it as a joke? Have you ever been harshly criticized by your child when he talked to you about some naughty things that his school classmates were naughty? If this is the case, then of course the child will hurt his self-esteem or be afraid of being criticized by you and will not want to communicate with you.

Children who are 12-18 years old, with the growth and development of children, children begin to have their own independent thoughts, children are willing to hide their secrets in the depths of their hearts, which is a very normal phenomenon in this growth period, but often children in this period are incorrectly educated by their parents, and make them hide everything they do, and they are afraid that they will be hurt, which is also a kind of self-protection consciousness enhancement.

Parents must ensure that they do not nagging in front of their children.

The more stressed the child, the less able he is to study hard, the lower the need for achievement, and the more likely he is to feel hopeless. The pressure of the person should be appropriate. However, children's stress is an invisible pressure that is not necessarily written on the face, but a pressure that spills out from the hearts of fathers, mothers, grandfathers, and grandmothers:

Child, study hard, if you don't study hard, you won't be able to get into a good university in the future, if you can't get into a good university, you won't be able to find a good job, if you can't find a good job, you won't be able to find a good partner, how will you live in the future......"Children are surrounded by such words every day, can he be stressed?

The important relationship in family education is the parent-child relationship, that is, the relationship between parents and children. Parents are the ones who influence their children throughout their lives. The quality and quality of the parent-child relationship largely determine the success or failure of education.

A good relationship is better than a lot of education. If the parent-child relationship is not good, it is difficult to succeed in their education; If the parent-child relationship is good, the success rate of education is also very high.

1. Parents usually ignore what their children say.

If you don't pay attention to what your child says (especially when your parents are busy, it's easiest to ignore what your child says, and you won't ask again when you're busy), then after a long time, your child will reduce communication or even not communicate.

Second, the child feels that his parents cannot understand him.

Most parents can't understand them from their children's point of view, and many things are nothing in the eyes of adults. But in the eyes of children, it is a big deal, their mental development is not yet mature, and they need to be explained and guided by their parents.

3. Parents usually put a lot of pressure on their children.

Nowadays, children are under great academic pressure, and they usually have various tutoring classes and interest classes. The expectation and competitive pressure from school, family, and classmates are all pressed on the children, and the communication with parents is always inseparable from the academic performance, and some children even have depression, but they can't see it at all on the surface, and they are very sunny and cheerful.

In the end, if you want children to be willing to communicate with their parents, you should still care more about understanding your children, don't just look at their grades, encourage them more affirmatively, and find their shining points in addition to their grades.

1. Don't care about what their children think, many parents like to interfere in their children's affairs, and when their children decide good things, parents will intervene and change, and let their children do what their parents want. But children are also independent individuals, they have their own ideas and thoughts, and there is no need to follow the wishes of adults in everything. Especially in the face of children's own affairs, they have the right to decide what to do, if parents blindly interfere with children, children are naturally reluctant to talk to parents, and the resentment of parents is getting deeper and deeper.

2. Your own affairs are not importantWhen happy and interesting things happen in school, they will share them with their parents as soon as they return home, but some parents do not listen to their children carefully, and their hands will be busy with their own affairs all the time, and they will not respond to their children's words. Parents' behavior will lead to children thinking that their own affairs are not as important as their parents, and it is useless to talk to parents, so they slowly do not want to talk to their parents, and the gap between them and their parents is getting bigger and bigger, and the generation gap is getting deeper and deeper. 3. Chat topics are always learning, in the eyes of parents, children's learning is the top priority, so every time you talk to your child, the topic will always be based on learning, parents buy delicious food for their children, tell their children that only good food can be good learning, parents let children go outside to play, tell children to relax appropriately, so that it is beneficial to children's learning.

Parents are learning when they open and close their mouths, and children will definitely feel bored, and if their children do not study well, parents will be furious and think that their children are not good children.

Questions. The second year of junior high school boys cold war parents, don't take a bath in front of them, don't eat in person, don't go to recheck their eyes, first of all, parents have to put down the shelf. Don't always think that you are an elder, you know everything after a lot of things, and you always point fingers and say that this is not right, and that is not right.

Instead, we should find the strengths and strengths of the child, communicate with the child on an equal footing, inspire him in praise, let him do something, help him get the joy of success, and feel his own strength. So as to establish confidence and run towards the goal. Second, discover your child's interests.

It is not only interested in children's learning, but also in various details of children's lives. Learn to appreciate your child, even if it is temporarily difficult to learn, as long as you can find a shining point in him, praise him and encourage him. Children may also gradually transfer other interests to learning.

Third, learn to wait. Education is a slow job, and educating one's own children cannot be boosted. In the process of growing up, children need to find their own living space in the family, and at this time, parents should not talk too much and be in a hurry.

Otherwise, there may be contradictions, even a cold war. So parents need to learn to wait and see what happens. Fourth, we must learn to be flexible and persistent.

That is, we should not only adhere to the principled issues, but also pay attention to the methods, and try not to provoke the children to explain the causes and consequences of the problems and the interests clearly, so that the children can think for themselves.

First, what the child says is useless.

The child says the child, the parent says the parent, the parents' words and deeds are similar to the Huang sect leader, don't you think, I want me to feel.

Over time, the child thinks that what he says is unimportant and useless, so he is naturally reluctant to say it.

Second, parents don't listen or ask anything.

Communication is two-way, and effective communication can only be achieved on the basis of mutual understanding and understanding.

Parents will not, or say they are unwilling to communicate, which leads to at least 3 consequences, 1Parents don't understand their children's troubles, 2Parents' daily arrangements, words and deeds are easily at odds with their children's needs, and children are more likely to think that their parents do not care about themselves and do not understand themselves.

3.Children will not or say they are unwilling to communicate.

Vicious circle. 3. It is called communication, but it is actually preaching.

What impressed me the most was "Juvenile Talk", in which too many parents have this kind of behavior.

Children are communicating, parents are preaching.

The child is apologizing, and the parent is still making demands.

Respect each other, treat each other equally, teach by word and deed, give less orders and discuss more.

Nowadays, there are too many books and online articles on parent-child communication, as long as you are willing to find and learn, from communication methods to conversation skills. I think communication can be done in two steps, listening and speaking

Learn to listen first. Listening to children is not an easy task for parents, and I recommend the book "Listening to Children", which has four principles.

1. Respect your listening partner and believe in the effectiveness of your attention.

2. When listening, focus on the other person's problems and don't be distracted by your own problems.

3. Identify the crux of the problem that the person is talking about.

4. Help your listening partner release tension.

1. Failure to let children be respected.

The reason why many children are reluctant to communicate with their parents is that they are not respected in the process of communicating with their parents. For example:

When parents try to communicate with their children, they will always use "You are still young......"When you grow up......This is the beginning of such a statement, which will make the child feel that he is not being respected.

You know, in the process of children's growth, children are eager to be recognized by parents, if parents always do not agree with children's ideas and things, it will make children feel that they are not valued, so that children have "my troubles, ideas do not need to tell parents, because they don't care at all, but will laugh at me" thoughts, when children have such thoughts, naturally will not communicate with parents.

Therefore, when communicating with children, parents should respect children's ideas and statements, for example, when communicating with children, talk to children like this: "I am listening carefully to what you say......"Your idea is good, but ......This will make the child feel respected and recognized, which will make the child happy to communicate with the parent.

2. Make unreasonable demands on children.

In particular, many parents have not paid attention to this problem, that is: when parents always put forward some unreasonable requirements for their children, for example: when the child is watching TV, parents will drive the child to do homework, and then start watching TV by themselves, when the child asks the parents why, the parents can not give the child a convincing reason at all, and even some parents will reprimand the child.

When parents make unreasonable demands on their children, but the parents themselves cannot comply with this request, the children will feel oppressed, and the children will have the idea of "why should I listen to you, obviously you have done something that you are not allowed to do", so as to refuse to listen to the parents and refuse to communicate with the parents.

Therefore, when making requests to children, parents should first consider: whether their own requirements for their children are unreasonable for children? Or can you comply with this requirement?

If parents themselves are unable to comply with their own requirements, then stop making demands on their children, which will only deepen the gap between them and their children.