Why do some people lose their temper and don t change?

Psychologists believe that excessive emotional reactions are related to a person's personality and specific experiences.

First of all, temper is closely related to character, some people are born calm and introverted, such as Han Xin, who has great ambitions and endures the humiliation of his crotch, he is not angry, and endures it for a while. And some people are impatient and emotionally unstable. For example, Zhang Fei in "Romance of the Three Kingdoms", his subordinates said something wrong, it was a leather whip, which made people's skin and flesh open, and in the end he lost his life due to his short temper.

Therefore, one of the reasons why a person loves to lose his temper or not is determined by his genes, and he is born with it.

Secondly, a person's temper is related to his particular experience. If you often get angry about some small things inexplicably, then you should carefully recall whether you have had a similar experience in your own upbringing, maybe your tantrum personality is such an expression from your original family.

Each of us grew up in our own family of origin, and when we spend time with family members, it is usually our parents and siblings who have the greatest influence on us. If a child grows up, he often sees that when problems arise between parents or other family members, the way to deal with them is to quarrel and lose his temper, then his inner subconscious has formed a way to deal with conflicts is to quarrel and lose his temper. If he occasionally uses this way of dealing with conflicts and finds that the other party will be quiet in front of him, it will undoubtedly strengthen his psychology of using tantrums to deal with conflicts.

Slowly, this tantrum will become one of the main ways he deals with interpersonal friction.

In addition, psychologists believe that some people will see tantrums as a symbol of power. Therefore, we can also often see that bad emotions tend to go from the ** with high power to the people with low power. For example, a man who has been criticized by his boss at work returns to his office with a stomach full of anger, and when his subordinates ask him for instructions, he is very likely to lash out at his subordinates.

In fact, a large part of his tantrums with his subordinates is to vent emotions that he is not capable of metabolizing, so he throws these emotions at subordinates in lower positions. Doing so can help you regain your sense of control and power. Treating tantrums as a privilege to satisfy one's own special needs is especially evident in narcissistic personalities.

First of all, the temper is innate, and before the age of 12, the temper, personality, and habits have been set, and it is difficult to change. Secondly, it is just a temper tantrum as long as there is no harmful behavior, (such as throwing things, hitting people, etc.), under normal circumstances, it is normal to lose your temper, and if there is harmful behavior, you should control it more!

Someone has a very short temper, but he can't correct it. That's because the country is easy to change, and the nature is difficult to change. Temper is hard to correct.

Of course, many things are not absolute, as time changes, I experience more and more problems, and slowly my temper has changed.

There's a saying you've heard of before"The country is easy to change, and its nature is difficult to change"。People with a short temper generally have a harder time controlling their emotions. Because of his short temper, the relatives and friends around him usually don't interact much, or they accommodate him.

In short, it seemed to him that it would probably always be him"Win"。This accommodation fueled his temper even more. In addition, the temper tantrum has a tendency to be overwhelming, and if you want to change it, you must have considerable self-control.

As we all know, self-control is hard, especially when you push down a volcano that is about to erupt. Without strong self-control and this awareness, it is difficult to get rid of bad temper. There is also a possibility that this violent temper has brought him too many negative influences, so that he himself feels that he can't change it, like the kind found by his conscience, and if he doesn't change it, it will be difficult to move an inch and gain a foothold.

Only in this way will motivation drive him to make up his mind to change.

Temper is hard to change.

Temper is basically innate, and it is really difficult to change it later due to factors such as family when I was a child.