Boy 12 years old boy, what to do if you don t obey

Students who are now in their teenage years are prone to rebellious mentality. First, there are the mental processes that this period inevitably has; Second, society is becoming more and more individualized and self-oriented, which leads to a more rebellious mentality. Teenagers gradually have a mentality of avoiding the contradictions between modern people and society, and not being able to compromise with them, and they are full of many discussions about the value of life, the meaning of happiness, the worldview, and values.

In the contradiction of growing up, they ask: What is wrong with running away from the things they hate and pursuing the things that bring happiness? There's really nothing wrong with that, but you can't survive unless you face reality and keep telling yourself what makes sense to do it.

Reality or dreams, which one to choose? The frustration of choosing a dream leads to a continuous expansion of aspirations, and the resistance to the surrounding things, parents, and the school leads to a deepening of the rebellious mentality. This has developed the psychology of wanting to do the opposite with others.

There is a barrier between people, and one person can never fully understand the other. But at the same time, everyone must go through others to confirm their own existence.

Pump him directly, he is not big since he was a child, and he will be reversed when he grows up.

Knowing it with affection, moving it with reason.

1. Pay attention to skills in speaking: Pay attention to skills in speaking, don't go straight, such as children's emotional problems, maybe the child has not yet fallen in love, and the parents will directly judge, which will not only hurt the child's self-esteem, but also hurt the feelings. A large part of the reason why adolescent children are rebellious is that their parents are usually too strict with their parents and have to ask about everything, and after a long time, children will get bored and start rebellious.

Therefore, when communicating, parents should think about the problem from the perspective of the child's collapsed mold.

2. Discipline can't be too strict: When I was a child, my parents were too strict, did I have a desire to leave? What adolescent children hate the most is that their parents have to ask about everything and meddle in everything, and they hate being watched the most at this stage.

Parents must be relaxed in education at this time, and must not be over-educated, so as not to make children resistant to you.

3. Give children a certain amount of care: the care here and the above discipline are two aspects, and caring more about children does not mean that the discipline is too strict, because there are just some children who are rebellious because of the lack of parental care. Often, they use rebellious behaviors to attract the attention of their parents, hoping to be loved by them.

Therefore, parents must care more about their children in their daily life.

4. When there are different opinions, adopt democratic decision-making: when there are different opinions and contradictions, you may wish to temporarily deal with them. After a period of time, I will use an opportunity to communicate with my child, and let my child realize his mistakes subtly.

Create a democratic and harmonious family atmosphere. Children are individuals who stand alone and have their own thoughts, so they should be allowed to express their own opinions, and they must not suppress their thoughts.

1. Calm treatment: It is necessary to understand that the existence of a rebellious period in a 12-year-old child is a normal physiological phenomenon, and everyone may appear. It is necessary to deeply understand that the existence of a rebellious period is a relatively normal process, and anyone needs to go through this period of growth and training, so that parents can deal with such situations without being in a hurry and with a relaxed mind.

For example, a 12-year-old child may not know how to control his or her emotions, and when he encounters frustration, is not convinced by the discipline of adults, and feels disrespected, he may be more emotional, and even have excessive words and behaviors. At this time, parents can put the problem aside first, learn to deal with it calmly, the child's temper in the rebellious period comes and goes quickly, and then find a way to communicate after the child is calm, so as to better solve the problem;

2. Listen more: We must have more respect and understanding for children in the rebellious period, and when children have something to say, don't interrupt in a hurry, learn to listen, listen more and talk less, make less suggestions, criticize less, guide less, and understand more. After understanding the child's practice, the child will be willing to tell more ideas to the parents, and the understanding of the child will be more comprehensive, so as to better deal with the child's rebellious period;

3. Believe in the child and rent the child's independent space: When the 12-year-old child has a rebellious problem, parents must learn to believe in the child, believe that the child is good, believe that the child can change, and believe that the child's rebellious period will always pass. It is necessary to consider and solve problems from the child's point of view, and believe that the child can rely on his own methods to solve the problem.

Even if sometimes there is something wrong with the child, try to ignore the trivial things, only choose the most important issues, and choose the time, such as talking to the child once a month or so. In this process, we must give children enough space for independence, so that children can express themselves freely and develop healthily.

1. Understand and respect children as they should be, do not use anger to force children to follow their parents' opinions and make friends with children.

2. Let children understand the truth in the process of understanding and communicating.

3. As the child grows, guide him out of emotional problems or cognitive misunderstandings. The companionship, guidance and guidance of the parents are very important.

4. Let go and give children a chance to grow. Each rebellion represents the child's need for growth. As a parent, you should trust your child and give her some opportunities appropriately, so that she can learn to think independently and solve problems independently.

Children should also be given appropriate opportunities to take responsibility.

1. Understand the needs behind your child's rebellion. The reason why the child is rebellious is because his purpose has not been achieved and has been intervened by the parents, so in the face of the child's rebellion, parents may wish to think more about the child's purpose, for example, some children have been making trouble with their parents, the reason is that they have not given the child a mobile phone to play, in this case, parents can Bibi put forward conditions to the child, the homework is done, done well and carefully, you can play for an hour. If there's a mistake, then you can only play for half an hour, and you can do it yourself.

2. Pay attention to children but not spoil. In order to better cultivate children's mental health, parents should pay attention to their children's psychological changes at any time, control their emotions, do not treat children as emotional trash cans, let children do what they can for their children, and encourage men to cheat children to do more, which can not only enrich children's spare time, but also allow children to get a sense of accomplishment.

3. Teach children to express themselves positively. Some children, encounter a little obstacle, on the tantrums, such behavior is very bad, parents should actively guide the child to express positively, for example: buy ice cream to buy the child does not like to eat the taste, but can not return, the child is very noisy, has been dissatisfied, for such a child, parents to Bu Huai to tell him clearly.