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1.It is not surprising that you know the kindness of your parents when you have children;
2.It is the will of God that your parents gave birth to you, let it be;
3.Your parents are typical petty citizens, and in this way, there is no way to change their behavior and speech without changing their essence;
4.You will take care of the money in the future, and you should follow the trend with filial piety;
5.Learn to be flexible, don't care about grudges, live and work in a relaxed and sunny life, and you will live well.
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I really don't know what your parents think, you should tell them about your situation, tell them your real situation, if they are still like this, I think this kind of parents are not worthy of being parents, then you don't have to worry about them, you have bought a house for them, and in the future, you just need to give them a fixed monthly living allowance.
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It is recommended that you give some living expenses every month, and save some money for yourself to leave a way back.
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That's what your parents can do, and you should raise them, but you can talk to them. In many cases, it is not that the relationship department is good, but that there may be a communication problem.
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It's really hard for parents like you. If it's not easy to do, it's going to be done. The recommendations are as follows:
1. Let them sell their houses and exchange them for smaller ones. It's just a strategy to make them feel like you're not financially strong.
Second, tell them that the last big mistake in business is of course not true. Let them help you borrow money and see if they still blow it.
Third, it should be, for the rare type of parents, there is no too high good recruit for you. Living expenses, owed, can only be given by delay. If it is they who are able, do not give living expenses.
Because of your financial difficulties. If not, they only know about spending, thinking you're the bank.
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There are generally two reasons for this situation, one is that the family is not harmonious, and the family members are relatively indifferent to each other. If the child grows up in this kind of family environment, then it is easy to lack family concept and have no feelings for the family; In addition to the environmental factor, the other aspect is the personal factor, some people are indifferent by nature and have no feelings for anyone. The former can be adjusted appropriately to improve the situation, while the latter is difficult to change.
The way to get along with the family:
1. Mutual respect.
After all, two people grew up and came together from a different growth environment and different educational environments, so there are many values and outlooks on life that will have certain differences. Respect each other, allow each other to treat the same thing differently than yourself, accommodate each other, and try to change for each other while constantly running in.
Consider the problem from the other party's position, no matter what unpleasant things two people encounter in front of outsiders, they must save face for each other, don't talk about each other's things before and after, and always maintain his (her) dignity. This not only improves his prestige, but also saves you face, on the contrary, it is definitely not a good thing for you to lose face with your other half.
Second, be considerate and avoid misunderstandings.
In many cases, what we see with our eyes and hear with our ears is not necessarily the facts, and we need to understand and analyze the facts with our hearts! If the other party has done something that makes you sad, then you have to be considerate of him first, ask him for an explanation, and listen to the whole story! This can reduce some misunderstandings that don't have to be used, and affect feelings!
3. Communicate with each other.
In the life of a couple, communication is very important, if you feel that there are some things that the other party can't help, and then choose to hold it in your heart, don't say this, don't say that, slowly you will feel that the other party doesn't understand you, provided that you have told the other party? So no matter what you do, you have to say it and let the other person know, and at the same time, it also increases the other person's sense of security.
A good way.
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Summary. Hello dear and happy to answer for you. People who have no affection for their parents are psychological defects, and people who are cold to their parents and do not rely on their parents are not independent, but are essentially psychological disappointments.
His characteristic is that he has no intimate feeling with his parents, and he has no desire to share, and when he is wronged outside, he will not tell his parents, even if he has a lot of thoughts and wishes, he is not willing to bring them up to his parents<>
Is it a psychological defect to have no affection for your parents?
Hello dear and happy to answer for you. People who have no affection for their parents are psychological defects, and people who are cold to their parents and do not rely on their parents are not independent, but are essentially psychological disappointments. His characteristic is that he has no intimate feeling with his parents, and he has no desire to share, and when he is wronged outside, he will not tell his parents, even if he has a lot of thoughts and wishes, he is not willing to bring them up to his parents<>
The characteristics of this type of person are that they are not close to their parents, have no desire to share, and will not talk to them even if they have many thoughts and wishes. When it comes to establishing a good emotional foundation, it is the privilege of the conditions that only the parents enjoy, and we are just newborn children, and they have not used this privilege to play it properly, until now, to this point. People living in that era had many ideas that were not particularly open, and the transformation of their thoughts on a thing was often confined to a tendon and blindly pursued, so it would seem so <> to talk about it
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There are many reasons why children and parents do not have a good relationship, such as the most typical, when the child needs to be accompanied, the parents are not around, and when the child grows up, the parents also have time, only then do they think of communication, the relationship has passed the best time, the second kind is, there is no place to think about the problem from the perspective of the child, do not listen to the true thoughts of the child's heart, just blindly ask the child to do according to the adult's ideas, and the child will be more rebellious and disobedient after a long time. The correct approach is to accompany the child as much as possible when he needs to be accompanied, if he can't do it, then he should also try his best to make the child feel the love of his parents, and there is to communicate with the child equally, don't put the parents on the shelf, to stand in the same angle to analyze the problem, after a long time, the child should know that the parents understand him, and will not rebel.
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There are generally two reasons why children and parents do not have a good relationship:
Excessive spoiling causes children to disrespect their parents, do not understand their parents, and cannot think about problems from the perspective of their parents, causing children to be very rebellious.
The second type: parents only know how to satisfy their children's material desires, but rarely understand their children's true inner thoughts, and cannot have a common cognition and processing method of things, resulting in communication difficulties, mutual incomprehension, and inability to enhance feelings.
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When children are young, it is an important stage to build a sense of security, and the sense of security is mainly for parents, if parents often quarrel in front of their children, the fierce emotional struggle of parents, like a whirlpool, will plunge children into deep pain, for children, the battle between parents is the most terrifying thing.
Children who often live in parental quarrels will have a very lack of new sense of security, and will be emotionally sensitive, suspicious, and irritable, and will not learn how to deal with their emotions correctly.
When the child is young, he is full of trust in his parents, and his parents often lie to him, or they do not fulfill their promises, and the more such things happen, the child will become more and more disappointed, and gradually lose trust in his parents.
When the trust between parents and children drops to a very low level, the child's heart will be full of resistance and disgust to the parents, and when the parents are in the process of disciplining the child, even if it is very reasonable, the child will deliberately stand on the opposite side, which will lead to a very poor educational effect.
Many parents are accustomed to favoring the youngest child, so that the child enjoys different treatment at home, which will make other children dissatisfied, easy to spoil the child, whether it is a child who is biased or ignored by themselves, it will have a great impact on their mental health, many introverted children, will be dissatisfied in their own hearts, as they grow older, they will gradually break out, resulting in the relationship between parents and children, brothers and children, becoming worse and worse.
When some parents talk and laugh with outsiders, they will use some of their children's shortcomings and troubles as talking points, or reprimand and scold their children in public, which is easy to hurt their children's self-esteem, and will push their children to their opposites, and children will have hostile psychology.
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Hello, I am Xinyi teacher of family parenting education, and I have your question. Children and parents do not have a good emotional link, there will be many factors in this, let me help you analyze the following aspects:
The first is the importance of children's emotions, in the child's cognitive establishment stage, what role do parents play in his eyes, is it an elder, a friend or an excellent companion?
Secondly: As parents, do we seriously feel the emotional needs of our children, simply put, whether our children's needs have been responded to and met in a timely manner?
Again, is our love and companionship for our children of high quality?
And finally: what do parents look like in the eyes of children? Is there any timely and effective interaction and communication with the child?
These questions of mine are all questions that we need to think about seriously as parents, if specific, I have a more in-depth explanation, and I look forward to continuing to share with you, I am happy to remember, and I look forward to communicating with you at any time ways and means to have a deeper relationship with your child.
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If the child does not have a good relationship with the parents, it may be because the parents are disgusted with the child's education method, it may be that the parents are too harsh and strict, so that the child feels afraid, or the parents' values make the child feel different, at this time we have to find the reason from ourselves.
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It should be that parents have not given enough care to their children since childhood, so children grow up with a lack of love, and they don't know how to express their feelings for their parents, so the feelings are relatively poor.
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It may be that the parents do not give the child a good company, or the child's growth environment is not good.
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How do you deal with your parents' emotional problems? In front of parents, there are some things that you really can't do and can only do according to the situation. If there's a best zero, it's the best. But the scales are always tilted like one side.
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In front of parents, there are some things that you really can't do but go with the flow, and it would be best if you could have the best zero cut-off point, but the balance will always be tilted like one side or the other.
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Summary. Having no affection for their parents and not being able to love them is the normal emotional reaction of a normal person; If you don't have feelings for your parents, but you love them very much, but you are not emotionally and emotionally normal;
has no feelings for their parents and can't love them, this is the normal emotional reaction of normal people; If you don't have affection for your parents, but love them very much, you are not emotionally and emotionally normal;
They have not lived together since childhood, have no emotional foundation, and it is difficult to form attachment relationships; This in itself will have an impact on people's internality, making you more insecure, having a hard time trusting others, and paying more attention to other people's evaluations; And when you live together at the age of 6, they are only your parents in name, and emotionally in your heart, you don't have the emotional connection that your parents should have, so their discipline of you will only make you farther away from them. We can't choose our birth, our childhood upbringing, and our parents, but as we grow up, we can choose our own life. In other words, as we grow up, the image of our inner parents has a greater impact on our psyche than the real parents.
Therefore, even if you repair with your parents now, you will have to love an abnormal family, but it will not be able to simply heal your inner wounds. I don't know your age, when you can be independent, be independent as soon as possible, keep a certain distance from your parents in space, and maintain a relationship with them within the range you can bear; When the inner emotions and plots cannot be adjusted and dealt with by themselves, they may grow through psychological counseling; When we grow up little by little, when we can take 100% responsibility for our own lives, at that time, you choose to love your parents or keep your distance from them, in fact, it will not have much impact on your life.
If you don't love your parents, you are selfish as a child, you don't have filial piety, you don't have the heart to love your parents, and you have less good thoughts than your stool. It's just a blind gnawing on the old with jujubes, and I don't understand the hard work and sweetness of my parents. Suit oneself.
Some were not only ungrateful but also beat and scolded his parents. Parents are very sad, crying bitterly, and sometimes think about it, the children who have just been born are good children. Why do you sell it, why do you raise it, and it changes its taste.
It's all pampered and doted on. Now it's all one, and I want the stars not to give the moon. Parents are also negligent in their education.
I think it's better to keep communicating with your husband and respecting each other, isn't the communication between the two of you not in place, and you don't care enough about each other, more communication and less misunderstanding
Because you have the pimple of the previous breakup, and your personality is more repulsive to that man. Although you are back together, there is still a pimple in your or your girlfriend's heart, and the common language between the two of you can sometimes become perfunctory. >>>More
Agree, in fact, everyone has the right to choose their own life, just live happily for the rest of their lives, in fact, their divorce does not prevent you from loving them at the same time, and they will live the life they want, don't force themselves together, no matter who it is, you won't be happy if they are not together, just love them as before.
Yes, even if there is no emotion, but the days when she was by your side you are impossible for you to forget right away, and when you break up, you will feel that something is missing, and your sadness does not mean that you love her.
In fact, there are two extremes for such a person to tell the truth, the first is very selfish, he doesn't listen to anyone who says, his temper is very explosive, he is very stingy, and he can't stand the slightest grievance, and the second is a real man, who will always feel the most sorry for you, because you are her only, the closest thing in the world is the parents and children and wives, the parents do not, the children are not, the only one is the wife, why doesn't he feel sorry for you? As for which one, you need to judge for yourself!