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For the situation that it is difficult to communicate with the rebellion, no matter what the reason, first leave him enough private space at home, don't easily touch his things, and don't do things that invade privacy such as looking through diaries and QQ chat records. In short, you need to treat him as an adult. Then, talk to him once when he's happy.
Understand his thoughts and convey to him that you care and support him.
If you find that he does have bad tendencies and need you to intervene, you should show conclusive evidence and then communicate with him. When the results are not good, try to go on a trip, or let him participate in sports activities such as long-distance running, playing ball, etc., or change the environment that you think will affect him (library, public lectures, temples, large exhibitions, university campuses, welfare homes, etc.) and let him find out on his own. Don't resort to violence based on subjective judgment, which will make your relationship difficult to reconcile.
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The child runs away, which means that you haven't paid attention to him usually, and the solution is to say, find you a partner, ask him what he wants, and then don't give money and let him show up for himself.
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As children grow older, their sense of independence will become stronger and stronger, once they were their parents' intimate little padded jackets, well-behaved little babies, but as they grow up, they no longer regard their parents as the only idols.
What parents say may not be right, and they may not accept their parents' criticism, and they will even fight back against their parents' ...... in their own wayAt this time, many parents can only helplessly sigh that their children are not sensible. But in fact, it is not that there is no solution, although the child has grown up, but not completely independent, at this time the correct education of parents is always important, and it also has an important impact on the formation of their good character in the future.
Methods of educating children during the rebellious period.
1. Think carefully about your child's request and respond carefully.
Rushing to a child's request and then rejecting it can make the rebellious child very annoyed and make it harder to trust the parent. Some parents habitually deny and then negotiate with their children, so that the children are opposed to their parents from the beginning. The right thing to do is to tell your child that I need to think about it carefully and then respond in a way that is acceptable to my child.
2. Get to know your child anew and understand his world.
Parents often pay too much attention to and urge their children to learn, and this kind of single communication cannot make their children open their hearts. If you want your child to accept it, you should talk to your child about his life and what he is interested in. Even if the child is reluctant to share, parents should support the child to do what interests him, so as to truly understand his life situation.
3. Change the original way of communication.
Exchange opinions with your child on an equal footing, learn which communication styles are dissatisfying your child, and give feedback on ways that make parents feel upset, and explore new communication methods together. If the child feels that the father always speaks with a straight face, he will be impatient when facing the father. The father will perceive the child as rude and act more serious, and the conversation will escalate into conflict.
However, if both parties understand each other's feelings and change the way they communicate, conflicts can be avoided.
4. Discuss with your child how to resolve the conflict.
If it is difficult for parents to find a way to reach a consensus with their child, try to discuss with your child what to do. For example, if a child wants to go to a distant place with his classmates, parents are prone to reflexively refuse. If you raise your worries about safety, health and other issues, and let your child think about countermeasures to reassure his parents, he will also know how to think about himself over time.
Set a bottom line for yourself: I won't ...... no matter what. Suggest to yourself often that this "self-communication" method is very effective.
Even if you have another argument with your child, don't feel guilty afterwards and continue to improve your behavior, and the results will get better and better.
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Remember to bring your child back for ideological education, and then for behavioral education.
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It's time for parents to change themselves and don't take their words as authority. Be friends with your child and speak in a consultative tone so that he or she is more receptive.
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Don't scold, patient guidance, kind smiles, and mutual respect are the best ways to get along with 18-year-olds! In this way, on the one hand, it will not cause too much pressure on the child, and on the other hand, it will also increase the opportunity for parent-child communication and enhance the parent-child relationship.
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Every day when a child grows up, for parents, as long as they see a little transformation of themselves, their hearts are full of strong emotions. From the moment they fall to the ground, over time, they learn not only to hit their parents, but also to crawl. From standing to walking alone to running, every process is filled with the hardships and sacrifices of parents.
Nowadays, children are getting older, but the relationship with their parents is becoming more and more estranged, especially during the child's rebellious period, most parents are very distressed.
What if a ten-year-old girl rebels?
1.Talk to your child instead of reprimanding him. 2.
Communicate with your child and learn more about their inner world. 3.Listen patiently and let your child release his emotions.
4. Praise and affirm your child more. 5.Communicate with teachers to find out how your child is doing in school.
6.Let go and let your child make their own decisions. 7.
Connect with experienced parents to exchange experiences.
What is the reason for a ten-year-old girl's rebellion?
1. Lack of effective communication. When children reach a certain age, they tend to turn their backs on their parents, not only because they enter adolescence, but also because parents come into conflict with their children very early. So, the child's rebellion is not temporary, but long-term.
If parents don't adjust their communication strategies and don't judge their children arrogantly, conflicts will only escalate.
2.Parents suppress their children's curiosity. Every child has an exploratory mindset and is full of mystery and curiosity about the world, but parents don't think so.
When children see something they've never seen before, they inevitably act or touch, even causing trouble. Parents don't understand that this is out of curiosity, but they think their children are playing tricks. An inexplicable beating or reprimanding will naturally cause them to be dissatisfied.
3.Treat your child like a child. Some parents ignore their children's growth and always treat their children as children. They are not allowed to do this or that. This is also an important reason for children's rebellious mentality.
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If the child has such behavior, the first thing is to analyze the reasons for the child's appearance, start from the reason to solve the problem, and the second is to communicate with the child seriously.
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You can communicate with him well, tell him what the effects and consequences of running away from home will be on him, and show him some examples so that he will understand.
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Parents can ask the teacher or the friends around the child in time, find the child's location first, and then don't be too extreme to beat and scold the child, and communicate calmly.
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Children will have a more or less rebellious period in the process of growing up, some children's reactions are too intense, and some children's reactions are average. As a parent, you should first lead by example and focus on leading by example. The words and deeds of parents indirectly or even directly affect children, and parents are the first teachers of children.
Secondly, after the child understands, he must know how to stimulate the child's learning heart, and many problems in life can be solved through learning. Finally, even if your child has a problem, be patient and love to communicate.
1. Lead by example. Parents are the first teachers of their children and will accompany them throughout their lives, and the growth of children is largely the result of their parents' education. Let your child do it, you do it first. For example, the promise of a thousand gold.
2. Control your emotions. Middle-aged parents face a lot of pressure, work, family, parenting, and so on. Sometimes it's inevitable that you can't control your emotions.
This time you need to take an "active pause". Wait until you are calm down before talking to your child.
3. Be respectful. Respect the child as an individual, respect the child's thoughts, respect the child's whims, respect the child's personality development, and so on. Instead of being a high-ranking elder and pointing fingers.
4. Listen carefully. In the process of growing up, children will definitely encounter all kinds of problems, encourage children to express themselves, and do not comment on the process of children's expression. Your child's confiding is also a kind of catharsis, and you have to learn to listen well.
You can make suggestions for the problem and encourage your child to try. But definitely not a directive.
5. GoalsUnanimous. What do you want your child to achieve? Is both parents consenting?
Is there a gap between your ideas and your child's ideas? You can share your goals well with a family meeting and break down your goals to achieve them one by one.
6. Actively communicate. There are many ways to communicate, such as verbal inquiries, letters, the use of modern means, WeChat, QQ, email, etc., as well as family meetings. The purpose of communication is to understand the situation, make a plan, solve problems, supervise, etc.
The most important thing is for the child to experience the care and love of their parents.
7. Learn to be a parent. We all have an internship period at work, and there is a process of adaptation, but there seems to be no parenting. Don't expect everything to be smooth sailing, but have a heart for active learning.
Problems are inevitable, and actively looking for ways is the right way. We were born in an era of resource sharing, and the use of many platforms such as Accessible, Parental Help, Zhihu, Toutiao, etc., can help us find answers.
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As a parent to educate the child, the first thing to educate the child is to tell him the danger of running away from home, and then to patiently communicate with the child to change his current bad habits.
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Parents want their children to know about the cold storage outside, and they can choose to let their children run away from home, and then secretly follow their children to make them afraid.
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Tell your child that if you solve the problem in this way, it will only make the problem worse.
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Remember to scold. After parents find their children, they should neither beat or scold nor ignore them, and should carry out psychological counseling in a timely manner. Scolding can easily lead to the rebellious psychology of children in the spine hall, and they will continue to run next time; If left unattended, it is easy for children to become arrogant and willful, threatening their parents to leave home and hide in the future.
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Usually give your child more care, encourage and affirm him. Parents must deal with their children's problems calmly.
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For a child in the rebellious period, parents should stay with him for a long time, get along with him like a friend, and don't blame him too much.
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1.Drop the posture. Communicate with children, do not give children a condescending feeling, especially the younger the child, the more parents should bend down or squat down to talk to them, keep their eyes on the level with them, do not let the child tilt his head to talk to you, let them feel equal way of communication.
2.Listen carefully. Regardless of whether the child speaks clearly and rightly, as a parent, you must listen carefully, do not be distracted, and listen carefully to destroy the traces is also a kind of respect for the child, parents can listen carefully, and the child will be interested in continuing to express, in this harmonious and enthusiastic communication, the child's oral expression ability will be well developed.
3.Be responsive. Parents should not only be listeners of their children's hearts and behaviors, but also be their supporters and guides, communicate with their children, respond positively, guide correctly, communicate patiently, let children feel the care and attention of their parents, and don't let children say ten words, but parents do not respond to a word.
4. Understand each other. In communication, children will have fewer problems, especially older children, for rebellious children, they will keep a certain distance from their parents, some things can be said to friends, classmates, but not to parents. At this time, parents should understand that they should not interfere too much in their children's lives or inner world, especially when communicating, the phenomenon of not saying words and arguing with children is not a little beneficial, and it will only make children less and less likely to talk to their parents.
Parents with children, stuffy Liang should understand more about the psychology of children in different periods, understand the art of communication, and have depth of communication, only in this way will children really regard their parents as friends and have nothing to say.
5. Parents should correct their mentality and don't think highly of themselvesTreat the child as a growing child, let go of the identity of parents, treat the child as an equal, speak, be a friend to the child, and make it easy to communicate with the child, and the child will tell the parents what they want. If your child does something wrong, don't blame him or her excessively and reprimand him or her in a lecturing tone. If your child understands the seriousness of the mistake, he will accept the parent's advice and correct his mistake.
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During the child's rebellious period, you can take the child to see more of the hard work of the workers, and tell him the consequences of rebellion if he does not go to school.
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First of all, we should create a good family atmosphere, communicate more with children, encourage more acacia and encourage parents, and take children out to see the spring skin of nature.
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