What does it mean to choose the right time to speak?

Many times we need timing to speak and do things, so how do we choose the right moment to do it? Let's take a closer look today.

Tools Raw materials.

Life. Job.

Method steps.

Learn to read words, seize the most appropriate moment, and then take the initiative.

You can ask others about some small gossip, other people's living habits and preferences, style of doing things, and so on.

Don't bother others when they have something to do, unless it's an important emergency, otherwise it will be offensive.

It's not good to think that you can regulate the emotions of others when they are in a bad mood, and don't rush to do it if you don't understand the situation.

Take the initiative to adjust the atmosphere, when you feel that the atmosphere is a little awkward, then you have to adjust the atmosphere at this time, and it is okay.

When others are ready to leave, don't follow them, just say hello casually, and don't talk so much.

Smart children usually know to ask for themselves when adults are happy, and most of their requests will be met at this time. When parents are in a good mood, they will be more tolerant and generous than usual so as not to spoil the atmosphere.

The same situation exists in the process of getting along with superiors and subordinates. Naturally, subordinates are not children and have no personal attachment to the leader. However, there is no doubt about the power subordination between them, and every benefit that the subordinate wants needs to be approved by the leader.

According to the actual situation, speaking according to the scene, what to say on what occasion, with whom to speak, and what to say, are all skillful, which is called choosing the right time to speak.

Choose the right time to speak, which means that the time and environment are more suitable, for example, in public, do not directly contradict your leader, which will embarrass the leader.

The so-called people follow the customs and pay attention to adaptability, that is, we must adapt to the time, occasion and our own identity when speaking, otherwise, it will affect the expression effect and will not achieve the purpose of communication. This is also what people often say, "what song to sing on what mountain", "what identity and what to say". "Warring States Policy" once recorded such a story:

Wei Guo has a family to marry a new daughter-in-law, and the new daughter-in-law points to the people of her mother-in-law's family while getting into the carriage: "Whose family is the horse on both sides of the carriage?" The driver said

It's borrowed. When the new daughter-in-law heard this, she hurriedly said to the charioteer, "Hit it lightly, and don't jerk the horse!"

When the carriage arrived at the door of the mother-in-law's house, the bridesmaid helped the new daughter-in-law to get out of the car, and the new daughter-in-law pointed to the bridesmaid and said: "After cooking, you must put out the fire in the stove, otherwise, there will be a fire!" When the new daughter-in-law walked into the yard, she saw a stone mortar on the road, and hurriedly said:

Move it under the window, it'll get in the way of walking! "People who know about it laugh at her. The new daughter-in-law spoke a total of three times from the time she got into the carriage to the time she entered her mother-in-law's house, and judging from the content of these three speeches, they were all very reasonable and very important.

For the first time, the driver was instructed not to slam the horse that was driving, because the horse was borrowed, so it should be cherished; The second time, tell the bridesmaids to extinguish the embers in the stove after cooking, on the wedding night, the guests are chaotic, the slightest carelessness, leading to ** disaster, will be very happy and sad; The third time, he instructed the servants to move the stone mortar, which was obstructing walking, under the window to facilitate the passage of pedestrians. But why do people laugh at her? The reason for this is that she said these words without considering the specific occasion and identity.

Depending on the occasion, there should be a difference in what is said. Sometimes, it is necessary to say something at the right time, and sometimes, it may be necessary to praise others, criticize others, comfort others, encourage others, etc., and pay attention to the tone of your speech. In any case, the necessary greetings are essential, it is a kind of etiquette or emotional exchange, perhaps the words do not have a specific meaning, but express the friendliness of the speaker.

Greetings must be in harmony with a specific era, environment, and object, for example, in the past, people used to say "long admiration of the daimyo", etc., but now it is rarely said so, and generally meeting is just to say hello, say "hello", etc. In public, even if you have a normal relationship with someone, you can't let him show his ugliness and lose face.

If her three words are said in her mother's house, people will think that she is a good girl who is very considerate of her family and good at living; If it is said three days after the wedding, people will praise her as a good daughter-in-law who is good at running the house. Because according to the customs of ancient times, a new daughter-in-law cannot speak much within three days of entering the door, let alone on the wedding day? So although the new daughter-in-law's words were very reasonable, she was ridiculed by others because of the wrong occasion and different identities.

It can be seen that time, scene and identity have a very important impact on the effect of speaking. So, we have to take care to adapt what we say to the requirements of time, context, and identity.