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Why is your child reluctant to talk to you?
1.There is a lack of equality in communication with children, and equal communication with children is something that many parents tend to overlook. When a child expresses some thoughts to you, as a parent, you must have said something like this::
You're still a kid, what do you know? This will not only discourage the child's willingness to express communication. More often than not, your child will feel that they have nothing in common with you, which will make them reluctant to talk to you more.
If we want to build a good relationship with our children, we should adopt a calm attitude to understand them and guide them appropriately. Instead of always communicating with others in a tough way. Parents have thought carefully about what we want their children to do.
2.Does the child really want it? Do you understand your child's needs?
Do you know what he wants? Like we said before "I'm doing this for your good", we may think it's for our children's good, but we never ask them if they're okay. A lot of times, we're making decisions.
children, even with the slightest option. Can't give to children, is that respect? It's impossible to empathize with each other, but you can take the initiative to understand your child's needs.
When we communicate, we often say "insincere", but in fact, the opposite is true. When many parents communicate with their children, they always appear in the form of scolding and saying something good to their children, but the tone between the words is sarcastic and hurtful. We must understand that children's sense of security mainly comes from their parents, even the closest people, and children are even more afraid to communicate with you.
3.Common forms of misunderstanding include criticism, abuse, baseless accusations, child suppression, and more. When communicating with children, we often have a misunderstanding:
We always treat questions as chats, and the content of the chat is very simple, either asking for learning or asking for food and clothing. It seems that the child has no other needs than these two. Not only that, but when children show different opinions on certain issues, they will also be blamed by us and indoctrinated with truth.
Many parents don't have a choice when it comes to communicating with their children. Our communication is often accepted by children under the banner of "for your good" and by means of "coercion and inducement". Success, it was a pleasant exchange, which proved that the child was willing to communicate with us.
On the contrary, it is difficult for children to communicate. We want to say that we care, not what children care about. That's why children are increasingly rejecting communication.
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First, I don't care what my child thinks. When parents complain that their children don't communicate with themselves and ignore themselves, they can reflect on themselves and whether they have paid attention to their children's inner thoughts. Second, they keep making demands on their children, but they can't do it themselves.
Third, lack of patience with the child and often interrupt the child's words. Children have a desire to express, and the desire to express is very strong, especially some younger children, but parents often interrupt the child's words, or prohibit the child from speaking, the child will gradually lose the desire to express.
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It may be because you are busy with work, it may be because you spend less time with your children, it may be because you often beat and scold your children, it may be that the parent-child relationship is not particularly good, it may be because you often perfunctory children.
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Your child may feel that he doesn't approve of the way you handled something, so he doesn't want to pay attention to you and wants to calm down for a while.
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Introduction: If parents find that their children are reluctant to talk to themselves, they should understand the reasons why their children are reluctant to talk to themselves. If a parent can't get into their child's heart, the child will have a conflict with the parents, and the child will not want to know what they are thinking.
Today, I will tell you why children are reluctant to talk to their parents.
Parents don't understand why their children are reluctant to talk to themselves, and the reason why children are reluctant to tell their parents is because parents always treat their children with a harsh attitude. If you want your child to change, you must go ahead of your child and help your child change this attitude, and if you can't treat your child with the right attitude, your child will be very sad. Parents want their children to understand one thing, parents do things for their children, good, if they want their children to get a good education, parents must go ahead of their children and tell their children what they should do.
If parents always treat their children with a harsh attitude, the children will also be very upset, and the children will feel that the parents do not value them at all. If you want your child to get a good education, you must tell your child what to do, so that the child will work hard in the direction that the parent wants. If a parent always does not pay attention to their children's grades and always takes their children's grades seriously, the child has no way to understand the parents' practices.
If parents want their children to speak, they must learn to actively communicate with their children, understand their inner thoughts, and don't let their children have conflicting emotions. Parents should find a suitable education for their children, do not let their children be wronged all the time, if the child has been wronged, the child will not be willing to talk to the parents, the child will feel that the parents do not respect themselves at all and do not understand themselves, the child will be sad. Parents should be friends with their children, so that their children can become better and better.
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It may be that the child is usually neglected to care for the child, and the child has a sense of distance from himself, so he should try to get close to the child.
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I think it may be because you don't usually take time to spend with your children, so your relationship with your children has become rusty.
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This is because he puts a lot of pressure on him in his daily life, and he always likes to criticize his children when he encounters things, so he feels unfamiliar.
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Some parents always feel that their children are reluctant to communicate with themselves, but in fact, this is a big reason for this. Some parents will always yell at their children in the process of communicating with them. Moreover, I found that many parents in China will not recognize their mistakes at all after they have done something wrong, but instead put all their mistakes on their children's bright holes.
If it were us, we wouldn't want to talk to people like that anymore.
We must know that children are also a single individual, and children are not a tool for us to vent, so we also hope that parents should seriously apologize to their children if they do something wrong. And we also need to know that no matter how young the children are, they also have self-esteem, and we can't just insult the children loudly outside. Parents should not always put on a high posture for their children, as the parents of children, we are the light in the minds of children, and we should contact and communicate with children like friends.
We can think about whether the child tried to communicate with us before, but the parents did not treat the child with a good attitude, which eventually led to this kind of thing. When your child is frustrated again and again, your child will naturally stop wanting to communicate with you, and parents should help your child establish communication opportunities. If a child is not spoken to for a long time, they will become an introverted person, and over time, they may suffer from depression.
We must lower our own ecology, communicate with our children seriously, and let them feel the warmth of their parents. In this way, the child will understand that he is loved by his parents, and the parents will be willing to listen to what is in their minds. Parents must not be too harsh on their children, in the minds of children, the closest is the parents, although many parents have good intentions, but children do not realize the good intentions of parents when they are young, so at different ages, we have to use different education methods.
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Because we have problems with the way we communicate, we always force the children to do what they want, so the children are reluctant to communicate with us.
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Because my child was scared of me and he thought I was going to scold him, he didn't want to talk to me or share with me what was going on at school.
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I think you always educate children with an adult's posture, and it is normal for children to be reluctant to talk to you, because he feels that he is not respected, so he naturally doesn't want to pay attention to you.
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Every day, the most interesting and practical psychology is the problem of most Chinese children and parents - the psychological distance between the two generations, the method of thinking, values, attitude to life, hobbies of interest and other aspects. But in my opinion, the "ditch" is not to understand the love, is the disappointment of zero communication. Children don't grow up to refuse and communicate with their parents, but most parents and children don't communicate in a real sense.
I am your father, so you must listen to me. "You have to study hard and grow up," "Why don't you listen to this kid, it's not a good kid." ”
Chinese parents habitually put themselves in the position of the absolute authorities, and the children who are incapable of resisting cause anything. They can barely hear what their children say, let alone explore their children's hearts, and they don't have to feel the emotional hurt of their parents. Cutting off the communication bridge is their own protection, once the bridge is difficult to restore.
Every sick child has a sick parent. It's not any problem with the kid. Better reflect on what is wrong with you.
Do you crave to compress your child's around? When the kid came home in the mud, it proudly said, did you face it when I got the first place today? "Sports, got a math test to get first?
Are you always perfunctory? Adults have to face an infinite stall that they can understand as bears children can understand. Of course, if you are perfunctory, do not blame your child after becoming an adult, or even deliberately run away from you.
Because of reincarnation, if you are very young from a child, you will move with him, and when you are old, you will ask your child to accompany you. Understand that the child will eventually lose the opportunity to listen, and the last child is reluctant to tell the parents. The child refuses to communicate with his parents, perhaps because his parents really feel that they will never see it.
of parents treat their children as their own personal belongings, and while they pay for everything, their children are not their own because the starting point is wrong. Your child is not your child. They are children who yearn for life.
They came into the world through you, but they don't belong to you. You can give them your love, but it's not your idea because they have their own idea.
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The child does not want to talk to you, it may be that you usually spend too little time with the child, the child is very strange to you, and you want the child to take the initiative to communicate with you, you can play with the child more, so that the child will take the initiative to communicate with you.
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I think the kid didn't talk to you because of timidity and fear. I think parents should be patient and proactive.
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It may also be because you often hit him, it may also be because the child does not get any words of encouragement from you, or it may be because you are busy with work, so at this time parents must take time to spend time with the child, and then get to know the child.
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It must be because you have scolded your child, or you often ignore him, which is why he is reluctant to talk to you. If the child does not communicate with you, then you should find a way to communicate with the child, be sure to talk to the child gently, you can start with the cartoon toys that the child likes, and open the topic to let the child talk to you.
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Because you are too strict and your child is afraid of being criticized by you, you should communicate with your child as a friend and do not create pressure on your child.
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Because children are unwilling to trust their parents, so they are unwilling to communicate with their parents, at this time parents should take the initiative to communicate with their children, and do not be too perfunctory, blindly ask children, and should also say some of their true thoughts.
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If your child is unwilling to communicate with parents, you can communicate with your child by letter or message, and you must change the way you speak.
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