Which types of families are the easiest to cultivate excellent children, and it has nothing to do wi

A family that can communicate well when encountering problems, and being in a loving family, a particularly warm family, can cultivate very good children.

The family atmosphere is very good, they can communicate well with their children when they encounter problems, and their parents have a very good relationship, so that these families can cultivate excellent children.

Their family relationship is particularly warm, they also care about their children, understand their hearts and do things more thoughtfully, will respect their parents, often accompany them to live together, such a family will make their children more excellent, speak and do things very elegantly, will not be in a hurry.

1. The mother is very controlling, and the father is absent from education.

Children in such families, especially boys, are either stifled from their self-consciousness and become a "mom treasure", or they are very self-conscious, very rebellious, and disobedient to discipline.

Because of the absence of the role of a father during his upbringing, he had less objects to imitate and learn.

At the same time, his mother's strong desire for control and excessive attention made him in a dilemma: either obey his mother's control, let his mother's will replace his own thoughts, and live as his mother's shadow. Either go completely with your own will and go your own way.

And no matter which option you choose, it is not the best choice for children.

2. Unhappy marriages in families.

A family with an unhappy marriage may be followed by family quarrels, cold violence, etc., as well as the mother's complaints and the father's indifference.

In such a situation, it is easy for a mother to twist her decision not to divorce into a matter of "for the sake of the child".

Then for decades, I kept complaining to my children: "It's all for you, I won't get divorced!" Look at your dad! Isn't it because of you that I have to endure him? I've done so much for you, if you don't listen to me, are you worthy of me?! ”

It is difficult for children who grow up in such a long-term emotional blackmail to be themselves, and they can only carry the burden for many years.

3. Everything is done and overprotective of the family.

For the child's arranging and overprotection, it seems that it is for the good of the child, but in fact, the parent is telling the child with actions: "You can't!" You can't do that! You don't do it! I'm amazing, I'll do it for you! ”

Over time, children become more and more dependent on their parents, less and less confident, and less and less inclined to new attempts. After all, there are still risks in new attempts, and isn't it better to sit back and wait for your parents to help you do a good job?

So one day when the child grows up, as a parent, you blame the child for not being able to do it and gnawing at the old!

He will ask you, "Why do you blame me for not being able to fly when you cut off my wings?" ”

4. A family that has no assertiveness and does not know how to communicate and discuss.

The typical feature of this kind of family is: no one is convinced by anyone!

When encountering a thing, everyone has their own ideas, they all want others to listen to themselves, they don't know how to communicate and discuss, they gossip, and no one can make a decision or make an idea. Whoever is loud often listens to whomever is loud.

Children who grow up in such a family are also difficult to have their own opinions, and they are often very vacillating and can't make up their minds.

5. Parents are not very good in character and habits.

A child who has watched his father gamble and get drunk and speak disrespectfully to his mother since he was a child, it is difficult to be educated as gentle and polite.

A child who has watched his mother bargain for two green onions for a long time is difficult to be educated!

A child who has watched his parents quarrel and slander each other and dislike each other since he was a child is difficult to be educated with warmth and love.

A child who grew up surrounded by prejudices and negative words from his parents is difficult to be taught to be impartial and objective.

These four kinds of families can't raise excellent children even if they are tired. The first type is a family that often quarrels, without a good family atmosphere, it is impossible for the child to have a sense of security. Some couples obviously can't get by, and they always say something, for the sake of their children, and to protect the family, but they end up together every day, and they quarrel so much.

This kind of family, do you really think you are loving children? You are obviously torturing the child, and secondly, in a family where the wife is not respected, if a little boy often sees his mother and is not respected by his father, then he will also disrespect his mother more and more. Then after I get married, I will disrespect my wife, which will lead to a very bad relationship between the sexes in the future.

If it is a girl and sees that her mother is not respected by her father, the girl will have a fear of men, and even a fear of marriage. Therefore, husband and wife must respect each other in front of their children and elevate each other. Some couples are very stupid and like to slander each other's parents in front of their children.

In a child's heart, if he can't be a role model, the child's values will be distorted or even completely shattered. The third type is a family that always makes the child's wishes come true. Plato once said that the most effective way to destroy a child is to make his wishes come true, and if he wants something in front of his parents, his parents will satisfy him immediately.

Then this child will develop a habit of taking. When he grows up and enters the society, who still makes his wishes come true, at that time is the beginning of his suffering, when the parents do their best to meet the child's requirements, it is the time when the child enters destruction, if you want the child to become a talent in the future, at home, you can't let him live too well, you can't spoil him too much. What the society will do to him in the future, how you should treat him at home, if he makes a mistake at home, you should be punished, you should be scolded, if he goes to the society, he will have a stronger ability to resist frustration.

Fourth, if you don't let your child do housework, if you don't let your child do housework, it will make him develop a habit of being lazy and lazy. Then he will be very lazy in his studies in the future, he will be lazy in work, and he will still be lazy after starting a family, so won't it be completely scrapped? A child remembers that at the age of three to four he can throw out the garbage, water the flowers, and hang up the clothes.

At the age of five or six, he can prepare utensils before meals, put away the dishes and chopsticks after meals, and make his own bed and fold clothes. At the age of seven to eight, he sweeps, mops the floor, does the laundry, cleans up the room, washes the dishes and cooks a simple meal. Do you think I'm particularly ruthless, I'm telling you that's how to love him.

It seems simple to join the labor, in fact, it is to let him develop an independent and diligent sense of responsibility, which is the wealth of the child's life, the child goes further, the adult takes a step back, this is called growth, otherwise it will not hurt him? Do you agree?

There is a saying that "the love of parents is far-reaching", parents are looking forward to their children growing up to be successful, but they attach great importance to their hearts, they are slow in action, and it is illegal to educate their children culturally. Seeing that the child has some small problems, it is easy to lose his temper and reprimand, which hurts the child's self-esteem, and the child's ranking is more likely to plummet, and the mood is low, which is also a severe blow to confidence.

Yesterday there was a parent-teacher meeting, and when I went home, I saw a parent at the school gate talking to the child, the child lowered his head and was very depressed, his head was dull, and he was a little afraid to look at his expression. I don't know what's going on with the child, the emotions have reached such a point, others seem to be a little heartbroken about the child, the mother still communicates with the child, learns to let go of the burden in the child's heart, moves forward lightly, and devotes herself to life and learning with an optimistic attitude. To make a child outstanding, parents need to put in a lot of effort and energy, and these 4 types of homes are relatively easy to raise excellent children.

Dr. Quan Huixing raised six children, all of whom were sent to Harvard and Yale, all of whom were social elites. She once read a book "Dedicated Parents Cultivate Big Shots", and she and her husband are not like ordinary people, always urging their children to learn and train, but only "chattering" to them all day long, that is, they must be good Samaritans. Dr. Jeon Hye-sung's father often told her when he was alive

If you want to become a dazzling big person, rather than an ordinary life, you must first know how to think about others. "A person's excellence depends on how much assistance he gives to others. ”

These words are very helpful to their own lives and children, "Those who love love to return, and those who are blessed are blessed." If we always think about how cost-effective it is to take advantage of others, pursue immediate interests, instead of thinking about investing in selfless dedication, there is no big pattern, and it is difficult to have a greater future. Culture educates children to do more things that are beneficial to social development and the collective, such as participating in public welfare activities, sharing personal learning and training tips with classmates, and paying attention to helping others in life.

Cai Xiaowan, an educator known as the "Master of Outstanding Talents", has six children, five doctors, and one graduate student, and his profession is a doctor, but he pays attention to his career as a "father", which is a lifelong career and life goal. He wrote his own educational experience into the book "My Career is a Father", which was summarized into five personal feelings, the first of which is to regard shaping children's success as his own life and career, and put him in the first place in the management of daily affairs, if he needs to give everything else.

An open-minded and democratic family is more likely to raise excellent children, and such a family environment will make the children's life less stressful, family relations will be more harmonious, and they will also behave well in dealing with others in the future.

There are also some children from poor families who are also doing very well, no matter whether they are rich or poor, they will not show off themselves, and it is recommended that this kind of show-off psychology is more than family education.

Respect children, educate children democratically, cultivate children's autonomy, and let children have a clear plan for their future.

Families who do not pay attention to their children's development will not produce excellent children, because in such a family atmosphere, young children are likely to have their self-confidence undermined. Children should be able to grow up in a better way, and children should gain more in the process, but if parents do not believe in their children and do not praise them when educating them, then children are likely to feel that they are not good at all. And in this process, children may also feel that they have been neglected, so they are not willing to take the initiative to work hard.

Parents should guide their children in the right way in this process, and encourage their children from time to time, so that children can get better harvests. And if parents don't know how to encourage their children, then the children themselves are likely to lose enthusiasm in the learning process, and in this case, the children will naturally not become excellent.

The reason why a child can become very good has a lot to do with the child himself, and it also has a lot to do with the child's own parents, and the role of parents in the process of children's growth is very important. If parents can choose the right way to guide their children to become better, then children can become more prominent, so as parents, we must know how to use the right way to educate our children.

Mom and dad can choose to praise their child after the child has done something meaningful, because the little one needs praise from mom and dad. The praise of parents can make the child better, and in the process, the child's personal ability can be improved. Mom and dad are very important for their children's affirmation, so parents must know how to affirm their children.

Families who dote on their children cannot raise excellent children. Because the excellent qualities of children are exercised in ordinary times. Just let the child do more housework and call the child more. The more he does and the more he practices, the more he will be able to grow his skills.

The relationship between parents is very poor, they always like to yell in front of their children, often laugh at their children in front of outsiders, and pay attention to education methods.

Too much doting on children, the family environment is very poor, the family atmosphere is not harmonious, the parents' three views are incorrect, and they do not often accompany their children.

Families who quarrel often will not be able to raise excellent children, and if they quarrel often, they will make children feel particularly inferior.

He is very irresponsible in life, never cares about the child's thoughts, does not know the true side of the child's heart, does not pay attention to a very good rule for the child, and will not have a particularly good child.

Attention to these four types of families.

1. What is the family background?

Family background refers not only to the economic wealth of the original family, but also to the ideology, family customs, family atmosphere, living habits and other aspectsThe marriage of a child is the continuation of the marriage of the parents.

The marital status of parents will be imprinted in the child's life and affect the child's married life. Before getting married, you might as well go to the other party's house, see the life of his parents, and carefully feel the temperature of the other party's family.

1. The living atmosphere of the original family will affect the marriage.

In the original family, what is the family atmosphere, what is the attitude of the parents to get along, and whether the parents' perception of false feelings is good or not, will affect the child's concept of marriage and will be brought to the marriage of the newborn family.

In the original family, parents are affectionateThe husband and wife have a harmonious relationship, never worry about who does the housework, and the parents are meticulous and silently pay for the family, always conveying happiness and joy. Children who grow up in such a family will have a very good personality, and they will have a good feeling and yearning for marriage.

In the original family, the parents have weak feelingsMany times there is nothing to say, and you can only rely on communicating or maintaining the family through children, in such a growth environment, how much enthusiasm will the children have in their future married life?

In the family of origin, the mother is very strongNo matter how big or small things are, you have to listen to yourself, and Dad is weaker. Since the child will form a sense of identity with the same-sex parent, slowly, the daughter will identify with the mother and be as strong as the mother; The son is slowly like his father, cowardly and inferior, lacking responsibility.

In the original family, parents divorced prematurelyLiberated from an unhappy marriage, but it is an eternal harm to the child, in such a growing environment, how can the child who has been insecure manage his future marriage?