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Meng Fei said that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is: mother-in-law must know how to keep a distance, and daughter-in-law must know how to maintain politeness. I think that's a good way to deal with it.
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Basically, if you can live together, don't live together. Even if they are mothers and daughters, in the end, the lifestyle and consumption concepts of the two generations may not be the same, and it is inevitable that there will be places that do not please each other, not to mention the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Therefore, staying far away, visiting regularly, and taking care of things actively will help both parties maintain a degree of harmony.
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Some mothers-in-law should be the leader. What matters: attitude. Don't care what tasks the leader explains, whether they can be completed or not, they all nod and agree, and the leader is comfortable and can do anything.
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I am a rich daughter, I have always spent money lavishly, in my mother-in-law's opinion, this is a big problem, I don't know moderation when I have money, I spend money too casually, and I move it home if I have any useful or useless use! The best course of action at such a time is for both sides to take a step back and not interfere with each other. Whether you are a daughter-in-law or a mother-in-law, I would like to give you a piece of advice, when the other party does not ask you to do anything, do not interfere with the other party's choice and decision, it is beneficial for the other party.
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As a new daughter-in-law and a young man yearning for freedom, I have always advocated a small family. It's not that I don't love my husband's parents, but I know too well that the thinking of the two generations is too far apart, and there will definitely be problems living together.
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The status of the daughter-in-law in the in-law's family depends entirely on the attitude of the husband. Husband is the best lubricant to get along. Cultivate a good husband, in the past, he may have been a good son of his mother-in-law, and he was taken care of too well by his mother-in-law, but now he is Optimus Prime in a small family, a lubricant between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
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After all, it is two generations, no matter from the thoughts, living habits, and ways of dealing with things, it is best to live separately, each has its own space, and everyone will be more comfortable.
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I was pregnant, and my mother-in-law didn't take care of me for a day, she served my sister-in-law. I gave birth to a child and was confined, and my mother-in-law didn't take care of me, except for cooking me a few meals a day, I didn't do anything, and the day after I gave birth, I took Xiaobao by myself. Every day when breakfast was late, I told my parents, and then I don't talk to her now, and so does my husband, and I don't talk to him now.
When I was out of confinement, I cooked by myself and would never go there to see my mother-in-law again.
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Conditional children's shoes, you can live closer to your in-laws, or closer to your parents-in-law, the most ideal is the same community, there are things to take care of each other.
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Many men don't know how to deal with the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, which leads to deeper and deeper misunderstandings between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
Husbands who don't want to be splinted and want to have both the deep love of their mothers and the passionate love of their wives, then take a good look at this 12 precepts!
Don't have the notion of "parents who are everywhere".
Many husbands seem to share this notion and like to put this phrase on their lips as a sign of their respect and "filial piety" to their parents.
Especially after the wife was wronged by her mother, the frequency of this sentence was the highest, knowing that her mother was wrong, but she only dared to say it to her wife:
There are all parents in the world, no matter how wrong she is, she is also my mother, so you can bear with it! ”
In this kind of family, because women are not protected by their husbands, their love for their husbands will gradually fade, until they are disappointed in their marriage, and may even turn from forbearance to counterattack, and finally everyone in this relationship will be scarred.
From the day you get married, take the initiative to wean yourself.
Many men forget the change of roles after getting married, always think that they are still the good babies of their parents, the most obvious sign is that they are unwilling to leave their parents to live alone, his most high-sounding reason is: I want to take care of my parents!
In fact, there hasn't been much change from before he got married, ** saw him do something for his mother? My wife didn't dare to assign housework to herself in front of her mother.
Gentlemen, please think about it, did your wife marry you just to find someone for yourself to serve, to become someone else's appendage, to be enslaved by others?
Don't lose the principle of being a human being, only the life of your parents.
Under the influence of thousands of years of feudal ideology in China, "filial piety" has become a supreme virtue, and it has become the most easily used by parents to suppress their children's hats, as long as the children do not obey themselves, or slightly contradict their own opinions, parents will cry and wipe tears and scold: "You unfilial son, I raised you for nothing......."”
Therefore, in order to maintain the "reputation" of their "filial sons", men often give up their principles of being human beings, and they do not know what is right and wrong, and they do not distinguish between good and bad.
Especially when there is a conflict between the wife and the mother, it is the responsibility of the wife to blame the wife without asking, and helps the parents to blame the wife.
In this case, the man does not stand on a fair position to maintain the harmony of the family, but will only blindly ask his wife to endure humiliation and compromise to maintain the peace of the family.
Help your wife integrate into your family, don't help your family reject her.
There is a kind of man who when his parents find fault with his wife in front of him, in order to calm the resentment and anger of his parents, he echoes his parents' words and also says that his wife is not good.
Although you don't necessarily think this way in your heart, this kind of behavior gives your parents a psychological hint that if you are not satisfied with your wife, your parents will look down on your daughter-in-law more and more unpleasantly, and conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will occur more and more frequently.
When you say that your wife is not good in front of your parents, you get together with your parents, but your parents reject your wife and treat your wife as an outsider. The most hateful thing is to come to my wife with this sentence "Our family."
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Both mother-in-law and daughter-in-law should be mentally prepared before or after coming together. Whether it is required by law or fate, each other will become a family and live together. So, accept it unconditionally, no matter what the other person is, and try to maintain a good relationship as much as possible.
The mother-in-law should think more, the daughter-in-law is still young and has no life experience, and all aspects need to be improved and improved, and she does not require full blame. The daughter-in-law was raised by her mother's family and was the lifelong partner chosen by her precious son, who was sent by God to help her son live a fulfilling life, and she should be treated like her own daughter. The daughter-in-law should think more, and the mother-in-law will give away the son who was raised with hard work to become your favorite, and she should be honored like a mother.
Although all people are equal, they must also be distinguished from each other, from the big to the small. According to the principle of respecting the old and loving the young, the mother-in-law should treat her daughter-in-law as if she were her own child. The daughter-in-law should respect and honor her mother-in-law.
If you find that the other party has something inappropriate, don't make a fuss, make a big fuss, take care of each other, tolerate each other, be lenient with others, and be forgiving and forgiving. If you have a large number of adults, the other party will be aware of it, and you will definitely get good retribution. Everyone will meet different mothers-in-law, different daughters-in-law, and different husbands.
Many people say that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is good, so the central system of this relationship is linked - the husband must be a man with high emotional intelligence, in fact, if the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law have high emotional intelligence, this kind of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law conflict can be avoided, because they can talk and behave, and they will be considerate of each other.
Now in the new society and new era, many things are different, women have jobs, income, and the right to speak, and they no longer have to be angry with their mother-in-law, and the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is no longer the inequality it used to be. As a daughter-in-law, you have to think that this is her husband's mother who gave birth to him and raised him, and she should be filial to and take care of her old man with him, which will make him love and respect you more. In such a relationship of mutual love and mutual help, the family will be happier and happier.
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The deep-seated reason for the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is that the husband does not properly handle the relationship between the two people, so there will be a conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. You should keep a certain distance from your mother-in-law, be very diligent in front of your mother-in-law, give your mother-in-law some small gifts during the holidays, and tolerate some bad shortcomings, which can handle the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
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The deep-seated reason is that there is an age gap between the two people and different living habits. When dealing with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, try not to live together, and then the juniors should let the elders, try not to have conflicts with the elders, and hide if you can.
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The mother-in-law's needs for her son and the wife's need for her husband are different; Let your husband act as a glue, always care about your mother-in-law, don't work against your mother-in-law, be self-sufficient, and don't rely on your mother-in-law.
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I think the deep-seated reason for the conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is mainly due to the husband at home; Care for each other, understand each other, respect each other, take care of each other more, and try to disturb each other as little as possible.
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There is friction when living with my mother-in-law, how to avoid the deterioration of the relationship between my mother-in-law and daughter-in-law? How to solve the contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, we must first establish a thinking mode of respecting the elderly. After all, the husband's mother endured all sorts of difficulties to raise her children and pay for her life's work.
As a wise daughter-in-law, you should know the wisdom of "filial piety before pity" In this way, we can establish a good reputation for our daughter-in-law in the neighborhood, which also adds luster to our mother-in-law's face.
<> people have been together for a long time and there will be some contradictions, not to mention a group of people living under the same roof, so fearlessness in life is inevitable. When there is a conflict, you can talk to your husband first and let your husband communicate with his mother-in-law. But either way, don't be ashamed.
In this way, some small contradictions lead to others.
I think a lot of young people don't want to live with older people. Due to the different concepts of life, there will be conflicts between the two generations, especially families with children. The concept of childcare is also an important factor that can easily lead to conflicts.
So today we are talking about how to avoid conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law by living with mother-in-lawWhen it comes to two ecological families, this is about daughters-in-law. When a normal daughter-in-law gets married for the first time, her position is often wrong, because she has to be a complete stranger to the family, so what happens? Sensitive to everything!
In such a sensitive situation, a small problem can accumulate! Isn't that last sentence biological? A lot of things are intolerable!
Your boyfriend said he went to pick up his parents after the wedding. You should say you're related, but don't take your father-in-law and mother-in-law with you after the wedding. Because young people have a young life, especially during the newlywed and honeymoon, your little husband and wife should live in the life of two people, nurture the relationship between husband and wife, have no children now, and consider having children when their relationship, life and work are stable.
Most of them treat their daughters-in-law more than their own children, because they will rely mainly on their daughters-in-law in the future! As long as you treat your in-laws with the heart of your parents, there will be no contradictions!
The relationship between the mother-in-law is not very good, but it is relatively good, although she has been wronged, but she is also an example for the children >>>More
At that time, you had to take the initiative to explain to your mother-in-law that the moon mother-in-law can't blow the fan, and in the end it is you who will end up with the root of the disease, and if you are often in poor health, your husband will also dislike you. I'm in a worse situation than you, because my husband and I are working in Guangzhou, and I'm going to have a baby, I'm afraid that I will be wronged, I proposed to come to my sister's house in advance for confinement, my sister works in the hospital, I gave birth for half a month, and his parents came to see the child, and I brought a few apples when I came to see it. I haven't been back for three years, and once I went back to his house, I didn't have anything for the child, and his parents only had their son in their hearts. >>>More
is good to you, and guards against you everywhere in your heart, after all, you are not her daughter, for fear that you will take advantage of her family.
The general relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not easy to handle, because people are not easy to get along with now, and mother-in-law and daughter-in-law must be in contact, and the longer the contact time, the more they can find each other's shortcomings.
What I value most is mutual respect.
There are only these kinds of problems in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. >>>More