Why is this happening when children don t want to listen to their elders? How to solve it?

As children get older, children's education becomes a big problem. Although every pair of parents has their own "parenting scripture" in their hearts about raising children, children are still becoming more and more disobedient. The following problems are the specific causes.

1. Trust. I don't know if you've ever heard of Zengzi killing pigs.

story. Zengzi killed pigs and godsons in order to cultivate children's integrity, but more importantly, in order to establish a sense of trust between parents and children. This is how many parents and children are lacking in trust.

Parents promise rewards, but children finish but do not get them, and over time they no longer believe in their parents, and naturally they will no longer listen to their parents.

Even coaxing and deceptive education methods are not available, and parents' indifference to their children's needs will eventually lead to the loss of parental authority in their children's hearts.

2. Attractiveness. The so-called attraction is the role of parents as a role model for their children. Parents will be their children's guides, guiding them in the right direction, so their words will carry more weight in their children's eyes.

Only by showing the right ideas to the children through their own actions can the children be convinced of their parents.

Good conduct can win the respect of the child, thus reinforcing the good image of the parent in the child's mind. When children realize that what their parents are doing is more correct and reasonable, they will naturally feel that what their parents say is right, so they will listen and obey it.

3. DependenceThe child was bullied outside and wanted to seek help from his parents when he returned home. If parents are indifferent to this at this time, or even blame it, the child's trust in his parents will not only decrease. Many parents feel that their children's dependence on their parents is wrong, but the child's moderate dependence on the parent is reasonable, and the child's moderate dependence on the parents is reflected in the parents, which is the feeling of "being needed", and this feeling of "being needed" will continue until the child is completely independent.

At this stage, parents should maintain their children's moderate dependence on their parents, and only in this way will children be willing to listen to their parents.

Only by reading their children's hearts and understanding their children's thoughts can parents have effective and high-quality parent-child communication. In this way, children can better trust their parents and listen to their parents.

Children are reluctant to listen to their elders because they have their own temper and should calm down and interact with them to solve problems.

The child's reluctance to listen to the elders' words is likely to be because the child is in a rebellious period and has his own thoughts and tempers.

This is closely related to the fact that parents usually educate their children, and parents do not set a good example for their children. Parents should communicate with their children patiently and guide them slowly.

Many children would rather listen to outsiders than their parents, because their parents talk every day and they feel troublesome, so they think that what their parents say is wrong.

Because parents have no authority in front of their children, and children question their parents' words, and outsiders' words can convince children, so this situation will occur.

Children will feel that outsiders understand themselves very well, especially understand themselves, and their own family members do not understand themselves, no matter what they say to their parents, parents will not listen, and will only blame and scold.

Whether or not a child will listen to the advice of his elders is often influenced by a number of factors. Here are some factors and situations that may need to be considered:

1.Age: The age of a child is an important factor in whether or not they listen to their elders.

Generally speaking, the younger the child, the more difficult it is to understand the words and opinions of the elders, and the more susceptible to their own emotions and desires. Older children may be more rational and independent, and more able to understand and accept the opinions of their elders.

2.Intimacy: The intimate relationship between children and their elders can also affect whether or not they listen to their elders.

If the relationship between the child and the elder is close and harmonious, then the child is more likely to understand and accept the opinions of the elders. Conversely, if the relationship between the child and the elder is distant or poor, the child may be disgusted or ignored by the elder's opinion.

3.Personality and character: A child's personality and personality can also affect whether or not they listen to their elders.

Some children may be more stubborn and self-egoistic, and more difficult to accept the opinions of others. Other children may be more well-behaved and submissive, and more receptive to the opinions of their elders. At the same time, a child's personality and personality may also change as they grow older.

4.Background and culture: A child's family background and culture can also influence whether or not they listen to their elders.

For example, in some cultures, the opinions of elders are seen as absolute authority, and children are more likely to accept and follow the opinions of their elders. In other cultures, the child's autonomy and independence are more valued, and the child is more likely to take his own decisions and opinions.

To sum up, whether a child will listen to the opinions of his elders or not is affected by a number of factors. Factors such as age, intimacy, personality and character, background, and culture may all influence whether a child listens to their elders. For the elders, it is necessary to consider the characteristics and circumstances of the child, adopt appropriate ways and methods to communicate and communicate with the child, establish a good relationship and trust, so that it is easier to get the child's understanding and acceptance.

Whether or not children will listen to their elders depends on many factors, such as culture, family environment, age and personality, etc. Here are some factors that may influence your children to listen to their elders:

1.Cultural Background: In some cultures, older people have a high voice and their opinions are seen as supreme.

In such cases, children are likely to listen to their elders. But in other cultures, young people are often more respected in their way of thinking and behaving than their peers.

2.Family environment: If there is good communication and understanding between the elders and the children in the family environment, then the children may be more willing to listen to the elders.

And if there is tension between the elders and the children in the family environment, the children may be more inclined to make their own decisions.

3.Age: Young children are often more likely to listen to their elders because they are not yet fully developed to develop their own ideas and values. As children grow, they may begin to be suspicious of their elders' opinions and rely more on their own judgment.

4.Personality: Individual differences are also important, and some children are naturally more submissive and more likely to listen to their elders. Other children may be more independent and willing to make their own decisions.

In conclusion, whether or not a child will listen to the advice of his elders depends on a variety of factors, and everyone has their own opinions and ideas. It is important that elders respect their children's choices and provide advice and guidance where necessary.

1.Incomprehension: Children are young and may not understand or accept the ideas and principles of adults.

2.Loss of patience: Sometimes parents will only think about reasoning to educate their children, but ignore the importance of communicating with their children's hearts, resulting in children who do not believe in the sedan chair or are unwilling to listen.

3.Emotional reasons: children's emotions will often fluctuate, sometimes the mood is relatively low, closed to know that if parents educate children at this time, it is easy to cause children to be disgusted and unwilling to listen to their parents' opinions.

4.Resistance: In the process of growing up, children are born with self-awareness and the ability to think, and sometimes, children listening to their parents' education may produce a kind of resistance psychological hail.

I think it's because parents and elders often don't understand the type of kids they like. Parents and those close relatives who care about us and love us always think that they know their children very well, know what they need, what kind of partner they like, in fact, they go to find a partner for their children according to their own preferences, in other words, what they think their children like.

But in fact, when children become adults, their communication with their parents and relatives begins to be stylized, that is, they are very close on the surface, live together, and seem to see each other often, but they rarely communicate effectively. The words are simple communication in daily life, the kind of thought communication that is deep and touches the soul, and it seems difficult to achieve with parents and relatives.

First of all, there is a generation gap between the two generations, different values, and different views on many things.

Therefore, it is difficult for young people to open their hearts to these elders, and their true thoughts will not be confided in them. Because they don't understand it, they are likely to interfere in their own lives. Therefore, parents and elders are always wishful thinking about their children, and they think about it with their own ideas.

The same is true for emotional matters. And this kind of speculation is often inconsistent with the child's real thoughts and actual needs.

First of all, we need to recognize that children have a certain amount of psychological resistance in the process of growing up. This means that they will try to rebel against the expectations and regulations of their parents or teachers in order to prove their autonomy and independence. Therefore, if you simply tell them what to do, they may feel oppressed and restricted, and thus more inclined to rebel.

Second, children may be selective about the information they receive. This means that when they feel that certain messages are not in line with their values or interests, they may ignore them or unconsciously forget them. Therefore, if you try to convince them to do something they don't like, they will most likely choose to ignore your demands.

Third, language and expressions can affect children's obedience. If you use a commanding tone or reproachful language, children may feel attacked and provoked. Conversely, a calm and gentle tone of voice may be more acceptable and understandable by children.

Fourth, in some cases, children may not be able to understand what you are saying because they lack sufficient information or ability. In this case, they may maintain their stance and behavior, and no matter what you say, it won't change their mind. So, if you're trying to convince children to do something, make sure to provide detailed, understandable, and appropriate information, taking into account their stage of development and cognitive abilities.

Finally, we need to recognize that every child is unique. Therefore, you need to understand your child's personality and preferences in order to better convince them to do certain things. Some children may be more logical and rational, while others may be more emotional and intuitive.

To sum up, there are many reasons why children don't listen to you. Whatever the reason, we need to adopt the right way to guide our children to do the right things. This may take time and patience, but it will ultimately lead to better results.

I was like this in high school before, I just didn't like to listen to other people's teachings, even if I knew it was right and good for me, but I just didn't like it, and I would rather others say some nice slander. The main reason is that the pressure of my life at that time was really great, the college entrance examination was coming, and then I encountered some difficult things to solve in my life at that time, and I was very irritable and listened to some people's bad words, which was really uncomfortable. You said that you won't comfort me, even if you still say these things to me, although they are all right, but they are really true.

However, I was not the only one who had this situation at that time, almost everyone around me had this mentality, is this still a common problem of our post-95 generation? When I was a child, I listened to the teachings of teachers and parents a lot, and I was irritable, but now that I have grown up, I am still in adolescence, and I don't like to listen to the truth with the help of rebellious psychology, after all, most of the truth is hurtful, and I only like to listen to those nice words?

In addition, at our age, we really want to hear the affirmation of others, and we don't want our abilities to be denied or doubted by others. Especially for a very good and strong person like myself, I especially want to be perfect, at least try to show my perfect side in the tears of others, and I will always try to correct any shortcomings. But you've worked so hard to correct it, why do you want to hear someone else's denial?

If the child is disobedient, the following methods should be used to adjust the symptoms:

1. Actively analyze why the child is disobedient, such as whether it is the instruction issued by the parents, the behavior itself is wrong, or the words are insincere, and do not set a good example for the child, or the child is rebellious, enters adolescence, and has a sense of independence.

2. Parents and children can be friends, but the premise is to respect each other and communicate actively, express their feelings to each other, express their thoughts about each other, parents have ideal child performance in their hearts, and children also have ideal parent images in their minds.