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Song Ningfeng and Zhang Wanting are a pair. One is used to being a "gas bag", whether he is ridiculed by his partner or hurt his self-esteem, he always looks like he wants to explain but has no chance to explain, and the other is to suppress his partner when he has the opportunity, be aggressive, and never speak well.
Zhang Wanting and Song Ningfeng were married in a flash, they knew each other for less than a month Zhang Wanting was pregnant, and the two got married until the child was born, and there were all kinds of contradictions between the two, Zhang Wanting still commented on this relationship in an interview - we are not familiar with each other.
The audience thinks it's very strange, three or two months of marriage can be said to be unfamiliar, and children have been born for so long and still can't be acquainted, how should this kind of marriage be lived?
In this marriage, quarrels are full of them, Zhang Wanting feels that Song Ningfeng doesn't love her enough, and keeps asking for love, but what is the love in Zhang Wanting's mouth?
It is the partner who has to notice her emotional changes all the time, the one who saves her face in front of outsiders, the one who can't fight back and scolds her, and the divorced Song Ningfeng who meets Zhang Wanting, who is ten years younger than him, who is willing to give birth to him, has to love her unconditionally.
And what did this woman who asked for love from her partner do? Blaming and suppressing the partner, not respecting the partner's right to speak, and removing the partner's face for the sake of his own face......All in all, the series of operations is very suffocating. There are several scenes that are most impressive:
One is three pairs of "husband and wife" sitting on the moving bus laughing and chatting, Zhang Wanting's spearhead suddenly pointed at Song Ningfeng, and said in front of everyone that Song Ningfeng had a good life and found a good wife like himself, unlike his own hard life, he found a drag oil bottle like Song Ningfeng.
If it hurts her partner's self-esteem very much, Zhang Wanting can blurt it out without thinking, indicating that in places we can't see, similar "verbal violence" often happens.
Just look at Song Ningfeng's expression, embarrassed and a little submissive.
The second is that Song Ningfeng and Lu Ge are happily playing frisbee, Zhang Wanting chatting with several other guests, speaking of Song Ningfeng, using the word "sinner", and immediately after Song Ningfeng sat down after playing frisbee, he turned on the attack mode - disgusted that he was not qualified as an actor, because he couldn't even detect his wife's emotions; disliked that he didn't know people, and had such a good time with the insincere Lu Ge; He was forbidden to speak and deprived him of the right to express himself.
Zhang Wanting felt that what she said was reasonable, and finally left very angrily.
The third scene is reading a love letter, Song Ningfeng said what was in his heart, and Zhang Wanting cried while listening. Just when everyone thought she was touched, she said in the interview that Song Ningfeng's love writing was particularly ridiculous and hypocritical, and shouted in front of Song Ningfeng that she would not change it, saying that what he wrote made her very faceless.
Zhang Wanting often talks about "face", most of the moments when she suppresses her partner are for face, saying that Song Ningfeng is dragging the oil bottle to show her superiority, and the accusation against Song Ningfeng after playing frisbee is that she feels that the other party has not maintained her face, and it is not right to write love letters because he has made himself lose face.
But Zhang Wanting should never have reflected that when she suppressed and blamed her partner in front of everyone, she lost her face.
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Getting along with husband and wife is indeed the core problem that plagues thousands of families, and it is also the main culprit of the high divorce rate in some parts of our country.
It is said that it is easy to fall in love, but it is difficult to get along, not to mention that every couple is different, and there are a thousand ways to get along between a thousand couples, and they cannot be generalized.
The reason why it is difficult for husband and wife to get along lies in the following aspects.
First, a husband and wife are partners who are not related by blood, but are closer than relatives and have been together for the longest time.
2. The relationship between husband and wife is the coexistence of two people with completely different growth backgrounds, but they should be based on marriage and family.
Third, in marriage and family, the relationship between husband and wife can be as close as a conjoined baby, or as distant from each other as strangers under the same roof.
Fourth, because marriage is restrictive, it is impossible for husband and wife to come and go like strangers, so when the relationship is good, they can't love enough, and when the relationship is bad, they hate and kill each other, hoping that the other party will disappear from front of them immediately.
Fifth, husband and wife are a community of interests, one is prosperous, the other is lost, and even more so when you have children, you can't get good if you want to, and you can't disperse if you want to.
Sixth, husband and wife have been together for a long time, both the person who knows himself best, and the person who knows himself the most, when romantic love meets the cruelty of real life, without a strong heart, it is difficult to support a marriage, a family.
Seventh, marriage is not only the product of the union of husband and wife, but also the union of two families, and the relationship faced by husband and wife is more difficult than the simplicity of love.
Eighth, the material base determines the superstructure, the so-called"Poor couples mourn everything", without a certain material foundation as a backing, it is difficult for a clever daughter-in-law to cook without rice, let alone love.
9. Home is not only a place for people to relax, but also the source of all contradictions.
In the relationship between husband and wife, releasing oneself too casually can only let the other party see more of their unacceptable shortcomings, and if you don't learn to tolerate each other and understand each other, it is difficult to carry out the marriage to the end.
10. In the relationship between husband and wife, it is necessary to understand that everyone is an independent and equal individual, and no one can belong to anyone forever, and only mutual respect and mutual trust can last for a long time.
In my opinion, the above reasons may be the reason why the relationship between husband and wife is the most difficult in the world.
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Summary. Hello, it is an honor to serve you. The main reason why couples have difficulty getting along is a sense of understanding and tolerance. The main reasons are reflected in the following aspects. <>
Hello, it is an honor to serve you. The main reason why couples have difficulty getting along is a sense of understanding and tolerance. The main reasons are reflected in the following aspects. <>
Clause. 1. Self-worth protection. Everyone needs to embody a sense of self-worth in different fields, hope to be recognized and affirmed by others, and when there are differences and contradictions between the two parties, they all want to prove that they are right. Clause.
2. Maintain self-esteem. Individuals want to be respected by others, which is a need at the third level in Maslow's needs theory, and only when this need and the needs below can be fully satisfied, can it develop to a higher level of needs. Clause.
3. Power struggle. It is a struggle between control and dominance, and it is also a symbol of one's importance and status in the family.
When a man and a woman go from lovers to partners in marriage, they need to go through four stages: passionate love, divergence, comfort and stability. The most critical element in navigating these four periods is understanding and tolerance. Understand and accept the differences between the other party and yourself, tolerate the shortcomings of the other party, do not force the other party to maintain a high degree of consistency with yourself in philosophy and behavior, and allow the other party to develop and grow freely in their own way.
This requires a persistent, constant attitude of acceptance, enough patience and a high degree of self-support to not be overwhelmed by the trivialities of life. Either spouse needs to continue to learn and grow, so that they can constantly improve themselves, become a better version of themselves, and under their own influence, they can help each other meet the requirements of self-growth, which is a requirement and goal that requires lifelong development. Therefore, it is indeed difficult for husband and wife to get along.
I hope I can help you, if you have any other questions, I look forward to further communication and <> with you
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The most important sentence: speak people's words, say what is in your heart, and don't let people guess.
The biggest problem for couples is poor communication. Communication is crucial in a marital relationship because it helps couples understand each other's thoughts, feelings, and needs. If there is poor communication between couples, it can lead to misunderstandings, conflicts, and disagreements.
In addition, couples may face other difficulties when getting along, such as:
Lack of understanding and respect: In a marital relationship, it is important to know and respect each other. If there is a lack of this understanding and respect between couples, it can lead to emotional estrangement.
Different values and lifestyles: Couples may have different values and lifestyles, which can also be a challenge. For example, one person may prefer to be quiet and private, while another person prefers to be social and public.
If couples are unable to resolve these differences, it can lead to conflict.
Dealing with family responsibilities and roles: Dealing with family responsibilities and roles can also be a challenge in a couple's relationship. For example, one person may prefer to take on household chores, while another person may want to take on more money-making work.
If responsibilities and roles are not properly distributed between couples, it can lead to dissatisfaction and imbalance.
Finally, I wish everyone can get along in the most comfortable way for themselves.
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The biggest challenge for couples is to establish and maintain good communication and understanding. In married life, there may be disagreements and contradictions between husband and wife due to differences in personality, habits, values, etc. If the couple does not have an effective way of communication and understanding, these differences and conflicts may gradually accumulate and eventually evolve into larger problems, such as mutual distrust and emotional estrangement.
Good communication and understanding can help couples better resolve differences and conflicts and establish a healthier and more stable marital relationship. When communicating, couples should respect each other's opinions and feelings, not try to control each other or deny each other's views, but learn to listen and understand. In addition, couples can also spend more time together and engage in some common hobbies and activities to deepen their understanding and affection for each other, so as to better maintain their marital relationship.
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Due to the different original families, the husband and wife have different or even completely opposite views on the same event or contradiction, and at this time, if one party can be humble, the incident will soon be extinguished. But life still has to go on, living together, similar events will continue to appear differently, at this time, all are just humble and give in, for a long time, more intense conflicts will escalate, and even affect the ...... marriage
Therefore, the biggest problem is how to tolerate each other and be humble to each other!
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The hardest thing to get along with your partner in a marriage is to give up your obsession. Not only do you give up your obsession, but you also need the other person as your partner to give up your obsession.
Everyone has their own rules of life, and they use this principle to evaluate the right, wrong, beauty and ugliness of things. As partners, both parties must first have a similar or similar three views, which is the basis for two people to come together, and the stage of getting along is the process of understanding each other's three views. It's not about appreciating and admiring, it's about measuring whether you can accept or tolerate it, which is the key to that.
Accept each other's habits, tolerate each other's faults, even if you accept and tolerate them, then how many things you don't know about the other party that have not been exposed, whether they contain the other party's deliberate hiding, and many unknowns need to be resolved after marriage, which determines the uncertainty of married life.
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Trust it! There is also empathy: being able to consider problems from the other party's point of view, and a sense of responsibility.
I think the above points are very important! There is also the ability to understand that no one is perfect, no one is perfect and omnipotent, and to recognize each other's shortcomings and praise each other's strengths.
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Every family has a difficult scripture, there will always be some difficult questions between husband and wife, different couples will have different specific situations, some couples spend money on the understanding is not unified is a problem, education children position, methods and attitudes are different, it is also a problem. Is there love for each other more of a major question? If one of the spouses is seriously ill, this will naturally become the biggest problem for couples.
If you are poor and lack money, you will become a poor couple and mourn.
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Tolerance and understanding, this is the most difficult to do, husband and wife will inevitably make mistakes when they get along, make big mistakes should be criticized, not so serious mistakes depend on your tolerance. Because there are some things that you can't understand what he's doing, don't understand what he's doing, and have a disagreement with his point of view, that's when you need your understanding.
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I think it's the trust that both sides have in each other. If both parties do not trust each other, they will be suspicious every day, and the result will be that both parties are tired and leave.
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It may be that you want to get a divorce right away
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