There is a joke about a boy cutting the girl s hair, and the girl s brothers come from all direction

When I was a child, I asked the little girl at the table what she meant by "handsome", and she took out a mirror and said to me, "Look for yourself".

I like to eat snacks, and after I got pregnant, my husband didn't let me eat messy, so I ate secretly. One day I went out and bought a bag of marshmallows, hid them in a cupboard with a plastic bag on them, and was found: "What is this?"

There was silence for 10 seconds ......continued to roar: "Do you think I can't see where you can't see at 1.6 meters?" ”

When I met a class flower on the street that I hadn't seen for many years, she asked me what I had been busy with lately. I answered truthfully: I have been very busy in the past two days, I placed an order with PetroChina yesterday, signed a contract with Telecom today, and I will talk about a contract with Unicom tomorrow.

Apple's tripartite cooperation plan. My daughter-in-law gave me a kick from behind and yelled: Refuel, install broadband, buy a mobile phone, what do you have to worry about?

What's the matter? ......What.

I drove with my buddy to run an errand, and I met the police at the intersection and was called by the police because I wasn't wearing a seatbelt.

The policeman said that he would be fined fifty if he didn't wear a seatbelt, and when he heard that he was going to be fined, he hurriedly explained to the police: Comrade, I'm sorry, I forgot to wear a seatbelt after drinking a little wine at noon!!

One day, a woman walked on the street, took out a wet tissue from her bag, wiped her lipstick, threw it on the ground, and was seen by the uncle who swept the street and said: "The ultra-thin one is easy to fall off!" ”

One day, I suddenly found out that I had an aunt, a second aunt, a fourth aunt, and a fifth aunt, but no third aunt. So I went to ask my father: Why don't I have a third aunt?

I also thought about it in my heart: Could it be that the third aunt died when she was young? My dad said angrily

Your third aunt is your mother!!

One day before getting on the bus, a certain gentleman folded a thick stack of paper and put it in the envelope, and found that the envelope was stolen after getting off the bus. The next day, not long after a certain gentleman got in the car, he felt that there was a hard object on his waist, and when he touched it, it was the envelope from yesterday, and the envelope read: Please don't make such jokes, it will affect normal work, thank you!!

1.One day, Xiao Ming and his father went to take a bath, and when Xiao Ming slipped and fell halfway, he dragged his father to that place, and his father screamed.

How many people were injured" The four of them are still fighting there 80,000! The policeman was startled and asked how many people had died, but he didn't hear it, and he was still calling there, saying 50,000!

How's the injury? The police asked Hu La!!

I want to buy clothes when I go shopping.

When I was shopping with my husband that day, I passed by a fashion store and saw that the clothes inside were really good, so I immediately wanted to go in and buy them.

I said to my husband, "The clothes are so beautiful, let's go in and have a look." ”

Husband: "What to go shopping!" The clothes in this kind of store are super expensive, do you have any money? ”

I looked at my wallet and said, "No." ”

Husband: "Let's go, go in and have a walk." ”

One day, Ming Ming went to the forest to play with the knife, and suddenly Ming Ming saw an 8-meter-long python, Ming Ming shouted: "What a long snake!" ”

Once upon a time there was a zombie and he was jumping around. And then let out a fart. Finally dead left.

The title is too vague.

Write a random one that I remember.

The girl said to the boy at lunch.

F: I'm pregnant.

The boy took a bite unhurriedly.

Male: ...I had a ligation.

The girl's expression struggled for a moment, and then she said.

F: Me. Just kidding.

The boy put down the dishes and chopsticks and smiled.

M: Me too.

Once upon a time, 1 American, 1 Japanese, and 1 Chinese were captured by the Savage tribe today, and the boss of the Savage tribe said: "I won't eat you if I'm in a good mood today, but each of you must hit 100 planks, and I will fulfill one of your wishes before you fight." "The Americans hit first

I have to put on 1 mat when I fight. "When it came to 70 boards, the mat was rotten, so the Americans hit 30 boards. The Japanese said when they hit:

I have to put 10 pads on when I play. "The 100 boards have been played, but there are still a few mats that have not been broken. The Japanese came up to the Americans and said:

Watching the good show of the Chinese, haha. The Chinese said, "Give me the Japanese pad."

When the Japanese heard this, they immediately fainted.

There was a child who was going to the toilet, and his mother, Bafa, put it on the table and said, "I finished pulling and eating!! I ate the after pulling it!

Last night, I heard someone say that I was handsome, and I thought about it all night, who leaked the news?

I shouted, "I'm not handsome!" Suddenly, God's voice came from heaven, "No.

Some people said I was handsome, and I stood on the balcony and thought about it for a night, who it was, and leaked the news.

Who else but you, who is not at home, who wants to run out.

I took off my pajamas.

A little girl was alone in the nursery one night when a little boy knocked on the door.

Hi, let me in. The boy said.

I can't let you in," the girl said sadly, "I'm wearing pajamas, and mom says it's not good for a little girl to be in her pajamas for a little boy to see." ”

The boy thought for a moment, and was about to walk away, when the little girl called out, "You can come in now, I'll take off my pajamas." ”

Foresight. Wife: "Why are you wearing my clothes, you have a brain problem!" When other passengers saw what it looked like, quickly take it off. ”

Husband: "Shhhh Don't you also know that when the ship sinks, the female passengers are saved first! ”

Gay jokes.

A guy went to the hospital for a check-up and did a number of tests.

The doctor said, "There is good news and bad news!" After looking at your test results, I found out that you have underlying homosexual tendencies!! And it's hard to **. ”

The guy said, "Oh my God! And the good news? ”

The doctor said shyly, "I found you to be quite cute......."”

I remember that someone sent a picture during the Lantern Festival this year, and there were 6 rice balls in the bowl, which were written as wealth, happiness, success, wishfulness, health, and happiness, but it was a pity that such a good thing was in the soup.

The thing Van der Vaart just ate v sent once to him to plug in wings fever stickers shopping malls have.

On the plane, a flight attendant said to a passenger who did not have a seat, "What seat are you in?" The man replied, "It's Aquarius." What about you? "I'm a Taurus, but I'm asking you what seat you have?" ”