Who has a joke, is there a joke

1.Once I was driving, the female colleague sitting next to me suddenly asked, "Why do you drive without a condom?" ”

2.In our dormitory, if one person drinks too much, he has to pee and then bring out a cold saying: If you drink too much urine, you will drink a lot.

3.Junior Chinese art evening, rush to answer questions.

Then he started to read the question and said, "Now open ...

At this time, one of the contestants rushed to answer.

The host said, "This classmate is a little too anxious. My 'beginning' () is still in my mouth, why did you grab it".

1) The first time Ah Qiu entered the city, he felt that everything was fresh while sitting on the bus, and suddenly he saw a small car coming from behind, and immediately ran to the front. Ah Qiu exclaimed in surprise: "Look, this little thing, he has been running so fast since he was a child, how did he get it when he grew up!" ”

2) "Jenny, can you tell how old your dad is this year?" The kindergarten teacher asked.

Dad is five years old. Jane replied.

The teacher smiled: "Xiao Zhen, think about it again, is your father the same age as you?" ”

Yes, my dad told me personally that he was a dad from the day I was born. ”

Passing by, some of the above ones are quite funny.

It is said that two mentally ill people managed to escape from the psychiatric hospital.

But you have to climb over 100 walls to get to the road.

They climbed 60 walls together, and one of them asked the other, "Dude, are you tired?" ”

The other said not to be tired.

He said, "It's not tiring, let's go on."

When they reached the 99th wall, one of them asked another, "Man, are you tired?" ”

Another said, "I'm tired! Let's go back! ”

So they flipped back again.

I am Ho He, you are the Dragon Boat Festival.

The old leather messer asked Xiao Ming how much 1+1 is equal to, Xiao Ming didn't know how much 1+1 was equal to, Xiao Ming didn't know how much to go home and ask his parents, Xiao Ming asked his mother and his mother was playing mahjong, and his mother said 2 buckets, Xiao Ming asked his father, his father was reading the newspaper of the burning huai, and his father said that he was in the United States, Xiao Ming asked his brother if he was eating popsicles, and his brother said that it was too cool to have another one, and Xiao Ming asked his sister that his sister was in love, and his sister said dear, let's go. The next day, the teacher asked Xiao Ming how much 1+1 is equal to, Xiao Ming said 2 barrels, the teacher asked you where did this answer come from, Xiao Ming said that the United States Ming guessed **, the teacher slapped Xiao Ming Xiao Ming said it was too cool, and then another one, the teacher told Xiao Ming to go to her office for a trip Xiao Ming said dear, let's go. And the following ** topic is:

Where's my car???

There are three brothers, the eldest is called a hooligan, the second is called a kitchen knife, and the third is called trouble. One day, the trouble disappeared, and the boss took the old pai Yu to the Public Safety Expert Bureau to report the case. After arriving at the Public Safety Specialist Bureau, the boss said to the police

The police attacked Picha, I am a hooligan, I came to the Bureau of Public Safety Experts with a kitchen knife to find trouble."

While the plane's crew was resting halfway, the captain took a flight attendant to the city's best places to eat, shop, and spend the night in a luxury hotel. The next morning, after the captain arranged the flight preparations, he found that the flight attendant had not yet arrived. He dialed the hotel's ** and asked the flight attendant what was going on.

She cried in ** and said she couldn't get out of the room door. "Why? The captain asked in surprise.

The stewardess replied, "There are only three doors in the room. One is the bathroom door, the other is a closet-type dug door, and the other has a sign on the door that says 'Do Not Disturb'! ”

On weekend mornings, my grandson was still lying on the quilt, but my friend Lao Li had already visited, so I hurriedly said to my three-year-old daughter: "Quick, go and call Dad." My daughter looked at me, hesitated for a while, walked up to Lao Li, and shouted timidly: "Dad." ”

Two friends discuss what kind of wife to marry the most economically.

A said: It is best to exclude the thin, thin people generally eat more, and they are not afraid of getting fat, chewing snacks every day, and they are not afraid of sweets; And the fat ones are not good, although they eat less, but they make a fuss every day, buy **equipment, eat all kinds of **medicine......I think the cost is not low.

B said: Then find someone who is neither fat nor thin.

A thought about it, but still felt that it was inappropriate: it was too ordinary to be not fat or thin, this kind of woman is often too ordinary, so she always wants to make herself eye-catching by dressing up and makeup, maybe it costs more money to apply grease and powder every day.

B pondered for a long time, and suggested: Then why don't you just marry an ugly-looking dinosaur?

A jumped up when he heard it: Dinosaurs are more terrifying, don't you know that the price of plastic surgery has increased now?

B: It seems that only marrying a beautiful woman is the most cost-effective - neither need to **, nor have plastic surgery, and you can save money on cosmetics.

One day, the three piglets built three huts to escape the big bad wolf. The big bad wolf blew down the grass house, the wooden house, and the brick house without much effort, and the three little pigs ran desperately, but they were still caught up by the big bad wolf. The three little pigs said in despair

You can do it. We gave up, whatever you wanted.

At this time, the big bad wolf sneered, drooled and said: Then tell me that Little Red Riding Hood is in **?