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Obviously, this is a friendship between two men, I'm a girl, I don't know much about men's thinking and the usual rules of doing things, but I know that such friends must be made if you want to make them, because people like him have friends, but it's hard to say whether they have a bosom friend Like my boyfriend, he belongs to the kind of person who borrows even a little money and has to pay them back as soon as possible He thinks it's a matter of character and morality, obviously your friend doesn't have such a sense at all, he will only ask from his friend, and then he doesn't achieve his goal Or throw it aside when you run out of use Actually, if I were your wife here, I would be like this Men sometimes estimate their face and are embarrassed to open their mouths or inconvenient things to do Let women do it There is nothing to criticize Because it is very normal for women to be careful Your wife does this to prevent future troubles I think this is very good If you are still nostalgic for this friendship Please don't invite you to see him get married Can you think of your help to him in the past ten years If he can still remember these You don't have to ignore the past Sometimes the brother still settles the account The purpose of saying ugly things in front is to avoid more ugly things in the back, I hope it will help you.
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You don't want such a friend, what is a friend, you can help each other, and you don't blindly ask for it, if you help him this time, then he takes it for granted.
That's why he asks for it every time.
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...Are you still friends?
Did he help you in any way?
Ten years of friendship, haha, has he cherished it?
You're just a financial friend to him, but you yourself consider him an emotional friend, right??
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Buddy is careless in making friends, you can see that many netizens can see clearly, your friend is not a thing.
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Don't want such a friend, don't worry about it, this is a friend of wine and meat, or a friend who loves to take advantage of a small advantage, why should you borrow a car to hold a wedding for someone else if you don't have a car, what a rich person, this is not a friend!! Top, your wife did the right thing.
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Your wife's fault, because of your wife, after ten years of relationship, if you find him out for a drink again, he will definitely come out. Go back and educate your wife well, and women don't care about men's affairs.
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There's nothing to say, it's true that your so-called friend is too much of this little thing, don't be too embarrassed yourself, we're not saints, there's no need to be so good to everyone, you have to have your own judgment!
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The human heart has a rod and scale, no matter who you want to pay attention to and assert, you must know to say no!
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Of course, I think you shouldn't have promised him behind your wife's back in the first place, so it's okay, it's annoying that you agreed and didn't do anything.
At the beginning, I should have told my buddy the truth, just said that his wife was strict, and found some excuse to let him understand.
Of course, I personally think that you also have problems with your friends and wives, and you should understand each other for everything.
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Friend, it is not only necessary for you to help him, but also for him to be able to help you, and you can't blindly deviate; Although everyone is saying that friends should help each other selflessly and do not ask for anything in return, but one party blindly asks for it, and the other party does not get anything, and does not get benefits and value from this relationship, so there is no meaning in existing. Friends who can eat, drink and have fun together, and will only ask for it, there is no return, you can only intersect lightly, don't take it too seriously. Moreover, friends should also learn to refuse, learn to express your opinions, say your heart, even if it is not right, it is selfish, even if you just want to refuse at that time, and you want to let your friends accompany you to be depressed, this is a friend, it is friendship, of course, this is also what you need to pay accordingly, this is the need for equivalence, fairness, exchange, relative pay.
This is just an unwritten opinion, I hope it will help your mood.
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It's not worth it to quarrel with his wife for this kind of friend, this kind of person will only say that he has never taken actual action, and he still cuts off contact early. bar.
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In fact, you didn't do your friend's job well, borrowing a car is not good, other help is okay, or you go to help his friend drive a wedding car, so it doesn't hurt your friend's feelings. My wife also does work there, I used to owe favors, communicate more with my wife, and I believe that your wife is also reasonable.
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You're not wrong, he's too selfish to get a really good friend with such a friend.
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It's better not to make such friends, and it's better not to make friends like this. It's best not to eat, drink and have fun, and others don't pay for it alone, otherwise it's cheap. It's best not to have too many financial interactions between friends.
It's better not to lend a car to a friend casually, it's too risky. If the wife does not agree to pick up the car, it is best to find a reasonable reason to push down the friend's unreasonable request.
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You have done nothing wrong, even if it is a friend with deep feelings, if he does not understand you, then there is no friendship between you, don't worry about this matter anymore, there will be gains and losses, and after this incident, you don't have to worry about the complicated interpersonal interactions between you.
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It feels like your friend is just using you as a charge card, and your wife probably sees who he is, so she reacts so much, and I think it's strange, if it's a real friend, you should be able to understand your situation, but the other party is angry with you, and it's probably not a good bird.
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A friend is not just a giver = = that's not called a friend = = so it's better to forget it = = you treat him as a friend = = he just because you don't lend him something, it's better not to be a friend = =
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People's hearts have rods and scales, and if they are worthy, they will do it, and if they are not worth it, they will be silent.
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It's not your fault, and your friends are very picky, and you pay for going out to play. You treat him as a brother, and he has nothing when you are a friend.
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Bored!! This question was asked a few months ago.
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Pull it down, you're the wallet.
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It's very simple, if you don't want to give, you can selectively ignore or behave hesitantly or something, if the other party knows Li Qiaozhou, then it won't continue to eliminate the leakage and go down, if the other party is still asking, you can say a word of embarrassment, and then pull a sentence or two of reasons, such as I don't like to deal with strangers very much, or I'm a little introverted or something. Alternatively, you can change the topic directly, which is very effective.
smile] bluntly refused.
We should reject some unreasonable or simply unacceptable demands, and resolutely not be vague or ambiguous, so that the other party will misunderstand us or even have unrealistic expectations.
We have the right to refuse inappropriate requests from others, but sometimes it is difficult to refuse, usually because of feelings, self-esteem, occasions, etc., or because we are too docile, we have to cater to others against our will and agree to others' requests. Over time, people will treat us as "very talkative people", they will make more excessive demands, they will habitually "bully" us, and it seems that it is a matter of course to help them do things. And we will be unhappy, we will be depressed, we will be unbalanced, we will be angry.
So why bother to promise others in the first place? No matter what kind of life or study or work we have, we must skillfully refuse some unreasonable demands of others and be a principled and self-conscious person in order to gain the true respect of others. Refusal can be said to be basic common sense in life, and it is also an art.
Or just say, if you don't leave, I'll call the police!
Or shout help!!
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1.Show gratitude and understanding: First, express your gratitude for their presence and for choosing you as the host of the group. Then show understanding of their expectations and requests.
2.Explain the reason: Be honest about the reason why you can't be accommodated, which can be work, personal matters, time constraints, or other planned arrangements. Make sure your explanations are sound and truthful, and avoid exaggerating or making up excuses.
3.Provide alternative advice: Try to provide some advice or help so that they can find suitable accommodation, travel guides, or local tour services in the city. This is a way to show your concern and help while allowing them to continue enjoying the trip. Jujube touches Hui.
4.Give an apology: Express regret and apologies for not being able to meet their request. Reaffirm the importance you place on their relationship and hope that they will understand your situation.
5.Inform them in advance: If possible, let them know as early as possible about your unavailability so they have enough time to make arrangements accordingly.
6.Stay in touch: Try to keep in touch with your relatives so that you can be there if they need additional help or counseling.
During the rejection process, be polite, honest and sincere. Understand the other person's expectations while insisting on protecting your own personal space and time. It is important to maintain good family relations through kind exchanges and suggestions.
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Outright rejection. There must be a bottom line in life, and nothing can exceed the bottom line. If relatives and friends make excessive demands and exceed their bottom line, of course, they will refuse, because they can't do it, and they can't let themselves do the wrong thing because of an excessive request.
So it's better to refuse. so as not to make an irreparable mistake.
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When a friend makes an unreasonable request to you, you can take the following steps:
1.Understand their needs: First, you need to understand their needs and requirements. Ask them why they need to do this and what their expectations are. This helps you better understand their ideas and needs.
2.Explain your position: Tell them where you stand and why you think the request is unreasonable. You can explain your thoughts and reasons so that they can better understand your position.
For example, your friend asks you to perform a dance at his birthday party, but you don't like to dance or you don't want to perform in public. You can look something like: "I appreciate you inviting me to your birthday party, but I don't really like dancing and I don't want to perform in public."
However, I can help you plan a fun game or prepare a special gift to celebrate your birthday. ”4.Stay calm:
When communicating with friends, it is very important to remain calm and sensible. Don't let emotions control your responses, and don't let your friends' emotions cloud your judgment. Staying calm and sane can help you handle the situation better.
5.Respect the other person: Respect the other person's opinions and ideas, even if you don't agree with their request. Instead of criticizing or attacking them, try to understand their position and respect their decisions.
6.Seek compromise: If you can't fully meet their demands, try to find a compromise. Find a mutually acceptable solution that meets their needs while also not making you feel uncomfortable or inappropriate.
For example, your friend asks you to help him move over the weekend, but you already have other plans. You can do something like: "I'm sorry, I already have other plans, but I can help you move some light items on a Minda Sunday morning, or help you find some other friends to help out."
This way, you can meet their needs without compromising your plans.
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As an office worker, we often keep in touch with our relatives. Most of the time, this kinship is harmonious, and we will support and help each other. However, sometimes we encounter some excessive demands, which brings some problems to our life and career development.
Here are some examples of celery that I would like to share, hoping to give you some understanding and empathy.
1.No Bottom Line Requirement for Financial Assistance: Relatives sometimes have sudden financial difficulties, which is understandable because we all want to be able to help each other.
However, some relatives are more than we can handle. They may ask us for large amounts of financial assistance, regardless of our personal financial situation and affordability. Not only does this excessive demand put us under financial strain, but it can also affect our own lives and future plans.
2.Excessive interference in personal life: Some relatives may interfere too much in our personal life beyond what is appropriate.
They may non-stop asking us personal questions about our love life, marriage plans, career choices, etc., and may even cross the line to directly interfere in our decision-making. This interference makes us feel bound and unfree, causing us additional stress and annoyance.
3.Excessive pursuit of material demands: Some relatives may have excessive expectations and pursuits for our material life.
They may ask us for expensive gifts, attend lavish parties, incur unnecessary expenses, etc. This excessive demand makes us feel stressed, and we may have to work hard to meet their expectations beyond our own financial means, causing unnecessary distress and burden on our own lives.
4.Beyond the scope of work help: As an office worker, we often encounter some work pressure and challenges.
Some relatives take advantage of our professional status to constantly ask us for help with work that is beyond our means. They may ask us to take care of their work matters, provide special career counseling, or even find new job opportunities for them. This excessive demand is beyond our responsibility as office workers, causing us additional burdens and distress.
In the face of these excessive demands, we should remain calm and rational and not be swayed by emotions. We can express our opinions and limitations firmly, clearly informing our relatives of our abilities and boundaries. At the same time, we must also learn to refuse some unreasonable demands at the appropriate time and protect our own interests and rights.
At the same time, we can also build a healthier and more balanced relationship by communicating more with our relatives and better understanding each other's situations and needs.
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