How do you get parents not to force themselves to perform in front of guests?

When I was a child, my parents would ask me to do this, and every time a guest came to the house, I couldn't avoid talking about their children, and my mother would often praise me for dancing well, and often participated in school performances, and then I would show the so-called dance in front of customers. At that time, I hated this feeling, maybe my parents didn't think it was anything, just to let others see how good their children were, but in my opinion, I was like a clown, clumsy performing, waiting for others to judge.

Something like this happened a lot, and it also seriously affected my psychology, I began to resist contact with strangers, and even more resistant to the performances arranged by my parents, becoming both introverted and rebellious, and my parents also found out about my reaction and tried to communicate with me. Finally, one time, I told my mother that I didn't want to perform in front of others, because I was afraid, afraid of facing strangers' comments on me, and I hated this feeling very much, and I began to hate my parents. My parents realized that what they were doing had hurt me, and I haven't done it since.

Now it seems to me that if parents often force themselves to perform in front of others, we should talk to our parents and tell them what we think, instead of going into silent resistance, which will only backfire. Tell my parents directly that we also have our own ideas, we have things we don't want to do, that I am not a clown, not an object that my parents use to show off, and I don't need to be recognized by everyone, let alone judged by everyone.

If this method still doesn't work, then be rebellious, direct confrontation, when our parents let us perform, we directly resist, maybe this method is too reckless and impolite, but if parents keep forcing us to perform in front of guests, then as children can only do so!

Generally, when parents meet with relatives, they will let us show our strengths and show our strengths. Sometimes we are forced to perform if we don't want to.

In the past, I was also deeply troubled by this, in my own opinion, I was not very good, and my parents had to let me perform in front of so many people, which was very embarrassing.

However, under normal circumstances, parents are very modest, after all, China is a country of etiquette, and modesty is one of the basic virtues of people. Asking you to perform is just to satisfy your parents' vanity a little, so that your children don't look too bad compared to other children. But they are embarrassed to praise you directly, after all, humility is still very important.

So I can only ask you to perform to show.

Once I understood why, I started to get cheeky. When my parents were communicating with other relatives, I would usually interject a few words when my parents were very modest in introducing me, and it was still the kind that I deliberately exaggerated. I don't think the test results are average, but it's very high, okay?

What's still pretty good at me, better than him, okay?

Usually after a few words, my parents told me to go to the side by myself and not to quarrel with them. Every time I get to this time, I'm happy to go to the side and play by myself.

But this blowing is not pure blowing, you have to blow to let your parents know your intentions, know what you don't want to do, and know what you are deliberately avoiding. Otherwise, your parents and other relatives will think that you are rude, and it will be embarrassing.

If you want your parents not to let you perform in front of everyone, you have to rely on your own efforts to fight for the opportunity for your parents to support you. But there's also a cheeky way that you fall in love with performing in front of a lot of people

Performing in front of guests is a must-do at every festival. Even if you're a cutie with no talent, at this moment of full reunion, your dad will make you suddenly have some talent. For example, singing and drawing.

..I had no talent, and I was urged by my uncle and aunt to draw a picture for everyone to see when I was a child. My aunts and uncles sat in a row, staring at the pencils in my hands.

I was denied the level of painting by my art teacher in the second grade, and I couldn't write at all.

I don't remember how such a grand event ended that day. It's just that when there is such a gathering in the future, I will definitely hide as soon as possible. Children who have been learning various musical instruments and dances since childhood have always been unable to avoid it, even if the instrument you learn is a cymbal.

What's more, there are also children who are asked to write an essay on the spot for the elders to read. From the moment your parents asked you to perform the show, it was destined to be an embarrassing performance.

Suppose you obey your parents' wishes and complete this "I really performed with you", your relatives will not understand it. They can only try to mobilize the beautiful words in their brains, and whether they are suitable or not, they can make an embarrassing statement every minute.

On the one hand, there is the cry of the children: Can't I be a child without talent?; On one side is the anxiety of parents:

My child is too shy, and he doesn't want to let him perform a show, and he still squirms. I said parents, children are not plays, they perform for everyone anytime and anywhere. Even if it's a play, you can't perform this kind of undignified performance.

Teacher Xiao Sa said:Children are born with self-love, they have a strong sense of self-esteem, and this behavior of forcing children to perform in front of relatives is the most damaging to children's self-esteem. This matter is often ignored by our parents because the child is too young.

Before asking your child to do something, parents may wish to think about what kind of mood and attitude they will have if they are asked to do it.

To be honest, it's too hard to change your parents' mindset and it's easy to get conflicted, so I suggest you change your mindset and enjoy performing in front of guests.

Why? First of all, parents must hope that their sons will become dragons and their daughters will become phoenixes, hoping that their children can get ahead and have a bright face. It's human nature to show off to others, and it can liven up the atmosphere and bring joy to your guests, killing two birds with one stone.

Since the visitor is a guest, you have to show respect as the host, so it's best not to be cold-faced if you are reluctant.

Secondly, I think you should have some talent in this area, and your parents saw this, so they let you perform in public, which can be regarded as a workout for you.

Finally, I hope you can hone your skills better and more professionally. When you really devote yourself to the things you are interested in, and see that you are working hard, your parents can't bear to bother you. At this time, if you can tell them more tactfully, can you reduce the performance in front of the guests and let me have more time to do what I like, I think they will definitely agree.

You can try to talk to your parents, if your parents are willing to change, it is good, if your parents are not willing, don't worry about your parents, know that your parents have this idea, when a guest takes the initiative to leave to play with the same family, so that you can avoid performing in front of the guests.

Just say I don't want to do it, it makes me feel uncomfortable.

It's good to just refuse to perform! Life is not acting, and no one can force others to do things they don't like in the name of love, right?

Let's talk to them, but it's hard, after all, they also have vanity.

Your own parents, you can tell them what you think, if it is not someone else, if they don't listen, next time it will be like that, you just refuse directly, and next time they won't let you perform in front of others!!

Communicate well with your parents, express your true thoughts, and talk about the impact your parents have on you.

You can communicate with your parents in advance, express your thoughts and attitudes, and you should be able to convince your parents!

As long as the guest feels impatient or the performance is boring.

When I was a child, I studied piano and took the exam until grade 8. I thought it would be enough to finish Grade 8 as my parents intended, and we agreed that I would never touch the piano again. But I didn't know that my parents still had expectations, that is, every time a guest came, I had to put on a show.

I always take the trouble to show the only ones I know, the ones I am familiar with. The guests sometimes looked helpless, and I could see that they quietly watched my whole family pretend. I don't think that's the way to go.

Until one time, a distinguished guest came to the house, and my parents wanted to sacrifice me, the KFC family bucket, again. He said to me, "Son, play a Mozart." ”

With my shoulders straight, my legs straight, my chest up, and my fingers flicking, I gave my parents and the guests a Hanon etude. What is Hanon Etudes? Hanon is the basic skill of improving finger dexterity, and a piece is full of repetitive fingering and melody.

It is equivalent to a leg press in ballet.

In order to make them listen to it happily and listen to it all at once, I started a single loop in their bewilderment, and the link was seamless. It's equivalent to your parents letting you perform a ballet, and you start to press your legs infinitely.

After I couldn't count the number of cycles myself, finally someone couldn't bear it, and said with a smile on his face that the little brother played really well, and he should rest for a while! My parents also quickly said yes, yes, let's go back and continue to talk and laugh!

But I didn't stop at all, I kept playing and playing, and I played Hanon No. 24 Etude to the groundbreaking, shocking, crying ghosts and gods. The sadness of learning the piano for many years, and the grievances of the parents who forced the performance, are vividly expressed.

I remember when I was emotional, I improvised a scene of my hands smashing the piano in a rage, and I could hear my Pedruff screaming and crying.

When my restless mood calmed down, I opened my eyes and found that my parents had taken the guests away. I think they've seen enough of me performing leg presses, crotch downs, and big jumps on the piano.

Since then, my parents have never asked me to show off my talents.

I think that if you don't want your parents not to force yourself to perform in front of guests, first of all, you have to learn to call relatives, uncles, aunts, brothers and sisters. A little sweeter in the mouth can make your parents happy.

Make excuses to refuse, if you can't refuse, communicate with your parents well, make it clear that you don't want to perform, hate this, and believe that your parents will understand you if they love you.

First of all, you have to make it clear to your parents that you don't want to perform, this feeling is annoying, it will be very unhappy, and your parents will listen to your opinions because they love you.

When a guest comes, you hide or find an excuse to leave the house to hang out. If you really can't leave the house, you have a showdown with your parents, saying that you don't like to perform in front of guests.

If you don't force yourself to perform in front of guests, you'll have to know something about yourself. Just open your mouth and say kind words yourself.

Tell your parents that you don't like to perform in front of guests, then your parents will restrain and won't let you perform in front of guests next time.

This requires you to communicate with your parents, who force you to perform in front of guests just because they want you to show yourself, they are so show-off, and you don't want to, so you discuss with your parents in private.

Communicate directly with your parents, make it clear that you don't want to perform in front of guests like this all day, and ask them to stop forcing yourself to do things you don't want to do.

Directly refuse, say that you don't want to, and then leave, even if you go home and be beaten later, then you will definitely not be forced in the future.

You can communicate directly with your parents and say that you don't like to perform in front of guests, so that they don't always force yourself to perform in front of guests.

This problem cannot be defined one-sidedly, according to our own personality to look at this problem, you are originally generous and cheerful, and it does not hurt to perform in front of relatives and friends. If you're an introverted and convergent type, this is a bit of a strong person's difficulty, at least I've experienced it deeply.

Look at this problem positively and understand the good intentions of your parents.

As the saying goes:"It can make the hearts of parents all over the world", parents have a heart that hopes that their son will become a dragon and their daughter will become a phoenix. If you have a cheerful personality, don't be too rigid about your parents often letting you perform in front of guests.

In the hearts of parents, it is not through your performance to show off to the guests, their original intention is to train you through various channels. In ancient times, there was "how can you sweep the world if you don't sweep a house", you don't dare to show yourself in front of your relatives and friends, so when you go to the social stage outside, can you show your advantages? All of this is also a timely stage for parents to improve your self-confidence, courage and expression skills, so be sure to understand their good intentions rather than show off.

Communicate calmly and speak your mind.

If we are introverted inherently, then we just want to be a beautiful woman or a beautiful man quietly. Then we have to tell our parents what we think, we just want to be a good child quietly, and I don't like to behave in front of others, and then every time I perform at your request, in fact, I am unhappy in my heart, although I know that you are for my good, but after many efforts, I still can't perform in front of the outside without any preparation. After communication, your parents will not let you perform when they meet people again after they know what you think

In short, communication and understanding are the best ways to solve this problem!