Why do I always fail to take the initiative in interpersonal interactions?

I always can't take the initiative in interpersonal communication, that's because I need to find a suitable environment for things to be handled smoothly, and some things always have to think of people's approval and lose some opportunities to talk.

This is related to the person's personality, it may be a person who is not sociable, don't force yourself If you are really uncomfortable, there is no need, you can choose some jobs that do not require communication.

If you still can't take the initiative in interpersonal communication, then it is caused by introversion. Because you always have a feeling of strangeness to others, this feeling makes you not talk about it, and you become very passive.

You are not alone, many people in your life are in this situation, this has a lot to do with the environment you were born in and education and other factors, if you want to make a change, then act quickly.

In interpersonal communication, one who is too proactive will make people feel that it is easy to get and not cherished. If you are too proactive in a relationship, it may cause the other person not to cherish the relationship and make yourself passive. There are many reasons why this happens, including that too active attitude will affect the state of equal interaction between each other, that the other party will have a downward view mentality because of their too active attitude, and that being too active with the other party will lead to the other party's contempt.

First, an attitude that is too proactive will affect the state of equal interaction between two people. People should maintain a state of equality in their interactions, so that they can maintain harmony with each other and develop their relationships steadily. In the process of interacting with each other, if one party is too active, it will affect the equality of the relationship between each other, so that the feelings between each other will be affected, and the relationship will not be able to continue.

Second, the other party will have a downlook mentality because he is too proactive. Under normal circumstances, two people in a relationship have the same attitude towards each other, and the perspective is level-headed. This will keep the relationship in a stable state and conducive to the harmony of the relationship between them.

If one party is too active, it will make the other party have a sense of superiority, think that they are superior, have a downward view on the other party, and no longer cherish the feelings between each other, which will lead to an imbalance in the relationship between two people and is not conducive to the stable development of the relationship between each other.

Third, the other party will despise themselves because they are too proactive. In the process of interpersonal interactions, mutual respect and mutual appreciation for each other are very important factors. This is the key to maintaining the long-term development of the Guanbi system.

If one party's attitude is too active, it will surrender its identity, so that the other party will despise itself and no longer cherish himself. If this happens, they will not be able to maintain a state of equal interaction with each other, and the relationship will eventually be greatly affected by the conflict between them due to the delay in their interactions.

Not only young people, but also middle-aged people like me, and many people around me are reluctant to take the initiative to socialize.

I have a friend who lives in the same community, the relationship is okay, and the baby often plays together when he is young. One day during the summer vacation, I said that I wanted to come to my house to play, and I happened to be at work, so I said that I would wait for the rest to find her. I hesitated during the break.

My family is very casual, if Naxiao comes with a friend or goes out together, at least I have to clean up the house, wash my hair and face and make a mess, and it's hot and sweaty, and I feel a headache when I think about it. So I forgot about it by default.

Why are we increasingly reluctant to actively socialize? Personal experience suggests that it is related to these three reasons.

First, the social environment.

When we were children, transportation and communication were not developed, so we needed to have a good relationship with our neighbors and relatives who were close to us, and help each other when necessary. Socializing is a must. Parents will ask their children to be polite and greet their neighbors warmly.

Relatives come to be warmly entertained.

At that time, people were idle, or during the New Year's holidays, they would gather together to play cards and drink, and even get together to watch TV and watch the National Day military parade. Busy and busy, I feel lively and festive, and I won't feel annoyed.

In the past, when I visited relatives and friends during the holidays, I would always forcibly pull my children and spend a few hours to arrive, in order to improve my life and eat a good meal by the way.

Now go to visit relatives and friends, drive, ten minutes to arrive, sit down, a cup of tea has not cooled enough to eat, people have already arrived at the next house. Mere formality. In addition, now children are not very interested in this kind of family affection that has turned sour, so parents will not strongly ask their children to participate.

Moreover, in today's society, everyone is wary of each other, and some people don't know each other for 10 or 8 years. If you don't have to, you won't say hello, so you can't interact with each other.

From "Because It's Your Life".

The second is personal mentality.

The generation of grandparents thinks that it is good for Huiliang people to be prosperous. The more people in the family, the more lively it is. In the years before my grandparents died, there were many young people who went to visit the New Year on the first day of the Chinese New Year, and those parents would ask their children to kowtow to their grandparents.

Grandparents will also feel that this is their own glory. So many people in the village came to visit, which was very face-saving.

In fact, many of those young people are reluctant to come, and some are extremely disgusted and kowtow.

Later, the number of young people who came to pay New Year's greetings gradually decreased, and the number of people who visited the house on the first day of the Lunar New Year was also much less.

They say that instead of greeting and bragging to others and pretending to be themselves, it is better for the whole family to get together, have fun and eat some delicious food.

The same is true for young people nowadays, who feel that it is better to spend time on ineffective socializing than to spend a comfortable weekend alone. Although time may be wasted, at least I feel happy and unrestrained.

In the discussion about the Z era, singer Jiang Xiangui said such a sentence: "The only link to this world is feelings."

There can be many reasons for reluctance to actively socialize, and here are a few of them:

1.Social phobia.

Social phobia is a psychological disorder in which the patient feels extremely uneasy and nervous, especially when facing strangers or social situations. This mental illness can lead to a reluctance to socialize because they feel incompetent or fear of embarrassing situations.

2.Autism spectrum disorder.

Autism spectrum disorder is a neurodevelopmental disorder that affects people's ability to interact and communicate socially. Patients may find it difficult to socialize because they do not have the right social skills and ability to express themselves.

3.Introverted personality.

Some people are naturally more introverted and don't like to express themselves or socialize in public, and may prefer to be alone or with people close to them. This personality may make them less willing to actively participate in social activities.

4.Social anxiety disorder.

Social anxiety disorder is a psychological disorder that makes people worry and fear social situations or dealing with strangers. This psychological condition may cause people to be reluctant to actively participate in social activities because they believe it may make them feel uncomfortable or criticized.

5.Special circumstances.

Sometimes people may be reluctant to actively participate in social activities due to certain special circumstances, such as poor physical condition, emotional problems, etc. In this case, people may need more understanding and support.

Whatever the reason, people should respect the choices and tendencies of others, learn to adapt to different social situations, and conduct social activities in the way that is most comfortable for them.

There are many reasons why others don't take the initiative to communicate with me, one is due to my own personal reasons, and the other is due to other people's reasons.

If you are an introvert and often sit there quietly by yourself and enjoy your life, this is someone else going to talk to you, to communicate with you, to disturb you, to disturb you, to make you feel that he is very annoying. <>

In high school, if you study well and spend most of your time studying, others will not take the initiative to communicate with you because they think you are busy, your paths are different, and there is nothing to communicate with you because of your different personalities.

Maybe the other person in your eyes is a person who doesn't like to take the initiative to communicate with others, he is more introverted, and he is also a person who doesn't like to communicate with others casually. Well, that's why others don't take the initiative to communicate with you.

Maybe he is a person who learns very well, because people who study well generally like to immerse themselves in their own world, he feels that immersed in his own world, he can also think deeply about the problems of life, he believes that knowledge is power, knowledge gives them strength, they will choose to be alone with books, travel in books.

Maybe your first impression is not particularly good, because if a person's first impression of you is good, he will take the initiative to communicate with you, which is the reason why the two people are more familiar. Because communication is a matter of two people, if you both have similar personalities and interests, then you like to communicate with him, and he will take the initiative to communicate with him.

I hope that when you see that others do not take the initiative to communicate with yourself, you can take the initiative to communicate with others, I believe that as long as you treat others with a smile, others will also treat you with a smile, as long as you work hard, I believe that nothing cannot be done.

You have to think about your own problems and your personality, whether you are an introvert or a very cold and arrogant person, and the first impression you leave on people is that you are not an easy person to approach, so it is easy to mislead others and it is difficult to communicate with you.

If you want other people to take the initiative to communicate with you, the first thing you need to do is to change yourself, you can observe the person who has a lot of friends around you, how he gets along with his friends, and you can learn from him.

Be sure to keep your smile and enthusiasm in front of the people around you, and don't have a serious face, which will make the people around you think that you are a person with a temper and a lot of troubles.

Everyone is a person who looks at the face and speaks, don't show your temper in public, once it erupts, it will alienate many people around you.

The people around you don't take the initiative, you can be the one who takes the initiative, you take the initiative to greet them every day, take the initiative to communicate, show your smile by the way, and after a long time, the people around you will also take the initiative to communicate with you.

Amiable people have the most friends around them, and there is not a lot of pressure to communicate with amiable people, but only to feel relaxed, just like communicating with old friends.

Don't show that you don't fit in when everyone is chatting together, it's easy for people to mistakenly think that you don't really like to get along with everyone, people like you are boring, and there are no people who have a common topic with you.

If you want to integrate into everyone's life circle, you must improve your interests more, and only like-minded people will have endless topics. Have a sense of humor, a sense of humor will change people's first impression of you, a joke will make everyone happy, and you will be the center of attention.

Everyone will have their own people who can get along and people who don't, which directly leads to some people who will not take the initiative to communicate with you, but if you encounter a situation where others are not willing to talk to you, you have to learn to find reasons from yourself. <>

1. Are you too introverted? People who are too introverted and don't like to talk will not attract the attention of others, and when there are many people, they will have no sense of existence, and when there are few people, they will feel that introverts are not interesting, so maybe it is because of your introverted personality that others will treat you as a little transparent. If this is the reason, you should try to learn to communicate with others as much as possible, open your heart, and not be too restrictive, so that you can blend in with everyone.

2. Are you a relatively indifferent person? You may have this feeling, the first time I see a person, I already feel that she is not easy to get along with, the reason why I have this feeling is generally because of a person's indifferent face, when talking to her will not smile at all, it makes people feel a little uncomfortable and uncomfortable, if you are in this situation, you have to remind yourself all the time, smile more. Laughing, ten years is less, there is no harm in smiling more, smiling is easy to narrow the distance between two people, and people who often have a smile on their faces will make people feel closer.

3. Are you a person who can't speak? Some people's way of communicating with others will make people very uncomfortable, but she herself can't feel it, for example, the tone of her speech is very impulsive, and when it comes to disagreements, she always has a posture of arguing with others, and everyone will stay away from such people over time, because they think you are too difficult to get along with.

In fact, you have to have a correct way of looking at this kind of problem. Why do others take the initiative to chat with you, they don't take the initiative to chat, you can take the initiative to chat with them, and slowly get familiar with them, and others will take the initiative to greet you. <>

When I was in junior high school, high school, and college, I took the initiative to chat with others. You'll get to know more people and maybe your best friends. In your mind, it is not the right attitude to think that others want to actively communicate with you.

So you have to avoid that attitude. You can start by saying hello to someone, or find a topic that interests them to talk to, and have some humorous jokes or jokes to ease the atmosphere. When you make jokes, you first have to consider whether the other person likes to joke, if the other person doesn't like to watch jokes, the joke will not be possible.

Otherwise, if you make a joke, people may get angry. This will also have a bad impact on your relationship.

Attitude is everything, and when you talk to someone, you have to smile or say something that cares. Make people feel like you're that kind of person. In this way, people will also take the initiative to communicate with you.

Don't wait for someone to talk to you, but think about how to talk to someone and how to talk to someone better. The next time we meet, she will take the initiative to communicate with you, and these are all exchanged through your active communication. So, change this attitude of yours and allow yourself to be more proactive, so that you can better communicate with others.

To do things, you have to take the initiative to communicate with others, so that you have the possibility of success. Waiting for others to communicate with you, then, others also think so, and want the other party to take the initiative to communicate with you, then, you will have no intersection. Active communication will have a positive impact on your life, study and work, and you will go further and further on your future life path.